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 "Man, the Universal Studios tour is a lot more realistic than I remembered"
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Aug 1, 2015 04:42
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 'DINSDALE?!?"
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Aug 1, 2015 04:45
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 "I sure hope the king doesn't find out we're throwing all his money off the balcony."
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Aug 1, 2015 04:51
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 "Not everything's about you, Lena Dunham."
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Aug 1, 2015 05:40
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"Bill... What the hell did you think you were doing there? I couldn't... I couldn't even begin to imagine how you'd even heard about it, let alone got yourself through the front door. And then I remembered seeing you talking with that prick piano player, Nick... or whatever the gently caress his name was, at my party the other night. And it didn't take much to figure out the rest. "
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Aug 1, 2015 06:41
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 "...proving gender is a social construct"
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Aug 1, 2015 06:52
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 "Quit staring at my hosed up parrot face."
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Aug 1, 2015 07:11
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"Ever since that day, I cannot look to the right." "So this is what you came to see on a Thursday, huh?"
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Aug 1, 2015 08:04
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...AND BOY, ARE MY ARMS TIRED!
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Aug 1, 2015 09:11
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"My nickname in high school was Brundleparrot."
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Aug 1, 2015 09:17
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let me in mom!!! posted:
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Aug 1, 2015 09:27
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Aug 1, 2015 10:30
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let me in mom!!! posted:
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#
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Aug 1, 2015 12:16
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Applewhite posted:
Joke is on them, this money will be worthless when bitcoin really takes off.
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Aug 1, 2015 14:37
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"I still say boiling oil works better."
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Aug 1, 2015 14:39
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"Really glad this is the Middle Ages and paper money doesn't exist yet."
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Aug 1, 2015 14:51
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"Allahu Akbar"
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Aug 1, 2015 14:52
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"Wanna hear a joke?" "Sure" "That hack Mankoff has sold his ugly rear end scribbles to The New Yorker"
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Aug 1, 2015 14:53
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 "And over the weekend we'll have... Oh, wow. I'm sorry, folks, I'm just... in shock over how bad our map's representation of Canada is. Dear Lord, that's awful. We have recognizable borders for a good 40 states on this thing, and yet Canada is just, like, a blob? On behalf of the entire News 10 team I would like to offer my most sincere apologies. We'll do better from now on, I promise." "...oh, also I guess some kind of Instagram joke?"
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Aug 1, 2015 15:00
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Aug 1, 2015 15:11
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 "Oh you're dying of thirst? You want water? Well luckily for you I've got some. But seeing as how this is a post apocalyptic capitalist society, some quid pro quo needs to transpire here... *zzzzzziiiip!*"
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Aug 1, 2015 15:22
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 "Oh my god! Should I call 911!?" "Should I call 911!? I'M loving DYING OVER HERE AND YOU'RE MAKING JOKES!? THE gently caress IS WRONG WITH YOU ALICE!? *cough* Oh god the pain!!!"
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#
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Aug 1, 2015 15:35
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Pudding Huxtable posted:
I posit that a person dying of thirst would not be a very fun person to receive a blowjob from on account of super dry mouth
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#
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Aug 1, 2015 15:42
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loquacius posted:I posit that a person dying of thirst would not be a very fun person to receive a blowjob from on account of super dry mouth Bleed b4 u seed. Basic cummies 101
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Aug 1, 2015 15:44
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 "Remember that you too will die"
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Aug 1, 2015 16:39
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"Oh my God, the New Yorker is in my house. It's finally returned for me."
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Aug 1, 2015 16:43
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 "I'm the wang in the bottom right"
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Aug 1, 2015 16:43
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 "Why do you have coat hangers as decoration?"
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Aug 1, 2015 16:47
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 "Excuse me, waiter? I would like the check, please. My blind date is a magician."
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Aug 1, 2015 16:53
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"Wait, make that two tampons."
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Aug 1, 2015 18:37
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Nash Regex posted:
Amazing.
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Aug 1, 2015 18:51
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"Larry called to tell me his party was the bomb."
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Aug 1, 2015 18:56
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Doctor J Off posted:
What won't you do for a Klondike bar?
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Aug 1, 2015 20:24
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 "Man up, you're only going to lose one of them."  "Nice work getting your shirts back. You'll earn your pants back after the Feminism lecture."
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Aug 1, 2015 20:30
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steinrokkan posted:"Wanna hear a joke?" Mankoff and BEK have parties with ted rall about holding down comics as serious art
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Aug 1, 2015 20:34
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"Never let yourself take night calls from the IMF."
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Aug 1, 2015 20:35
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 cuck cuck cuck cuck
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Aug 1, 2015 20:40
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 hmm yes after a very thorough analysis i've determined your wife's a oval office, dale
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Aug 1, 2015 20:46
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 we're learning how to dougie
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Aug 1, 2015 21:08
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| # ? Jun 7, 2024 16:47 |
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"I REALLY want the D"
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Aug 1, 2015 21:08
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