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MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?

Detroit_Dogg posted:

It is funny! Also I don't pretend to like him, Nick Saban rules.

Seems like kind of a dick. It's okay, I pretend to like Bret Bielema, I understand.

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Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

MourningView posted:

http://deadspin.com/im-a-grown-rear end-man-how-miami-trolled-the-hell-out-o-1723879297

Deadspin excerpt from an upcoming book about Saban. It's mostly about how Dolphin's players reacted to Saban's college dictator bullshit and is basically the greatest thing.

The image of Keith Traylor just standing there relentlessly taunting Saban because Saban is contractually barred from making him run while Saban just seethes in impotent rage is so wonderful.

zach thomas owns

AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel
http://www.wsj.com/articles/the-seduction-of-jim-harbaugh-1439481739

It starts with competitive motorboating

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007



Interesting that it's written by John U. Bacon, who basically shredded the program and alumni in "Three and Out" for actively sabotaging RichRod.

AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel

DJExile posted:

Interesting that it's written by John U. Bacon, who basically shredded the program and alumni in "Three and Out" for actively sabotaging RichRod.

Bacon's the most connected guy in Michigan, who calls it like he (and most everyone else) sees it.

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


AsInHowe posted:

Bacon's the most connected guy in Michigan, who calls it like he (and most everyone else) sees it.

Fair point, I thought they basically ran him out on a rail after Three and Out, but maybe not.

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT
I can't wait for them to go bowl-less this season

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


Detroit_Dogg posted:

I can't wait for them to go bowl-less this season

It's entirely possible they do. They have 4, maybe 5 games they'll be favored in. Sparty and OSU are going to destroy them, Utah gets them out west, and Maryland, Penn State and Minnesota won't be pushovers.

Harbaugh's a drat good coach but he doesn't exactly seem to have much in the cupboard left from Hoke.

D.N. Nation
Feb 1, 2012

How is "John U. Bacon" not 80 years old and bowtie-clad?

Thoguh
Nov 8, 2002

College Slice

D.N. Nation posted:

How is "John U. Bacon" not a false name used by John Candy

Ghost of Reagan Past
Oct 7, 2003

rock and roll fun

DJExile posted:

It's entirely possible they do. They have 4, maybe 5 games they'll be favored in. Sparty and OSU are going to destroy them, Utah gets them out west, and Maryland, Penn State and Minnesota won't be pushovers.

Harbaugh's a drat good coach but he doesn't exactly seem to have much in the cupboard left from Hoke.
Michigan's schedule doesn't do them any favors. Their non-con has Utah (who are going to be very good, and as you point out it's in SLC which is not an easy place to win) and BYU (also very good). Oh, and Oregon State, who aren't going to be good, but still, another P5 team?

If Michigan goes 2-2 into conference play they should count that as a win.

Also, BYU's schedule is something else :monocle:.

Ghost of Reagan Past fucked around with this message at 19:02 on Aug 13, 2015

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


Ghost of Reagan Past posted:

Also, BYU's schedule is something else :monocle:.

Holy poo poo yeah it is :psyduck:

AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel

DJExile posted:

Fair point, I thought they basically ran him out on a rail after Three and Out, but maybe not.

Dave Brandon banned him from the press box and petty things like that. That's all.

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT
Good move by David Brandon not letting the guy who helped run off Rich Rod hang around.

Spintzel
Dec 31, 2007

Distractions makes it better when ya take up the ENTIRE ROAD
I hope that Michigan continues to suck. And I hope that the sucky Michigan beats Ohio State just like your 2015 National Champions Virginia Tech

computer parts
Nov 18, 2010

PLEASE CLAP

Spintzel posted:

I hope that Michigan continues to suck. And I hope that the sucky Michigan beats Ohio State just like your 2015 National Champions Virginia Tech

Someone said this about Urban Meyer but if Harbaugh loses the rest of the season and wins the Michigan-Ohio State game he will have his job in perpetuity.

Detroit_Dogg
Feb 2, 2008
Aaron Rodgers is gay and lame and oh please cum in me Aaron PLEASE I NEED IT OH STAFFORD YOUR COCK IS NOT WORTHY ONLY THE GAYEST RODGERS PRICK CAN SATISFY MY DESPERATE THROAT
Listen here if you aren't placing your bets on the duo of Shane Morris/Jake Ruddock taking the Michigan Wolverines to the playoffs I don't know what to tell you

MourningView
Sep 2, 2006


Is this Heaven?
Poor Jake needs to legally change his name to Jake Rudock With One D.

Groucho Marxist
Dec 9, 2005

Do you smell what The Mauk is cooking?
I'm going to watch BYU lose in the best football stadium on my birthday

Thoguh
Nov 8, 2002

College Slice

Groucho Marxist posted:

I'm going to watch BYU lose in the best football stadium on my birthday

How did Missouri get away with scheduling a real opponent during SEC late-season cupcake week?

Rad Valtar
May 31, 2011

Someday coach Im going to throw for 6 TDs in the Super Bowl.

Sit your ass down Steve.
If Jim Harbaugh leads Michigan to a win over Ohio State it will be the best coaching job in the conference since Ohio State is light years ahead of Michigan at every position.

Raku
Nov 7, 2012

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

Roll Tide

Thoguh posted:

How did Missouri get away with scheduling a real opponent during SEC late-season cupcake week?

they won't be a real opponent once a dirty hit takes out their QB for the game

RumbleFish
Dec 20, 2007

Thoguh posted:

How did Missouri get away with scheduling a real opponent during SEC late-season cupcake week?

Missouri's schedules since joining the SEC have been really weird; I guess it's a hangover from how they did things in their Big 12 days. They tend to play all their cupcakes in a big batch at the beginning of the season. I'm sure they don't mind, as it's awfully convenient to have like a month to warm up before playing any conference opponents.

korrandark
Jan 5, 2009

Ghost of Reagan Past posted:


Also, BYU's schedule is something else :monocle:.

Did you see their 2016 schedule so far? :stare:

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


korrandark posted:

Did you see their 2016 schedule so far? :stare:

holy poo poo

It's like they're trying to get at least one game against every conference

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

RumbleFish posted:

Missouri's schedules since joining the SEC have been really weird; I guess it's a hangover from how they did things in their Big 12 days. They tend to play all their cupcakes in a big batch at the beginning of the season. I'm sure they don't mind, as it's awfully convenient to have like a month to warm up before playing any conference opponents.

Mizzou started the super cupcakes early thing when they went to the SEC for whatever reason. They used to play one at least sort of real team in week 2 or so, Arizona State or Illinois or whoever.

Also I didn't realize BYU has a 10 year bowl streak, they've made one every year Mendenhall has been there.

Scarf
Jun 24, 2005

On sight

Rad Valtar posted:

If Jim Harbaugh leads Michigan to a win over Ohio State it will be the best coaching job in the conference since Ohio State is light years ahead of Michigan at every position.

Which isn't likely to happen since Jim Harbaugh's understanding of astrophysics is probably rudimentary at best.

VDay
Jul 2, 2003

I'm Pacman Jones!

RumbleFish posted:

Missouri's schedules since joining the SEC have been really weird; I guess it's a hangover from how they did things in their Big 12 days. They tend to play all their cupcakes in a big batch at the beginning of the season. I'm sure they don't mind, as it's awfully convenient to have like a month to warm up before playing any conference opponents.

That's how a lot of teams do it though because they're busy playing conference games or P5 opponents later in the year. It's mostly just the SEC that gives themselves Bye weeks by scheduling Southwestern Chattanooga St in week 12.

Pakled
Aug 6, 2011

WE ARE SMART
ACC teams front-load the cupcakes on their schedules too. Almost everyone has an FCS and a G5 opponent within the first three weeks, with Louisville being the notable exception.

D.N. Nation
Feb 1, 2012

RumbleFish posted:

Missouri's schedules since joining the SEC have been really weird; I guess it's a hangover from how they did things in their Big 12 days. They tend to play all their cupcakes in a big batch at the beginning of the season. I'm sure they don't mind, as it's awfully convenient to have like a month to warm up before playing any conference opponents.

Mizzou played UGA the second week in their first SEC season and got their asses kicked. Ever since, their conference openers I swear have been in November.

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


Grittybeard posted:

Also I didn't realize BYU has a 10 year bowl streak, they've made one every year Mendenhall has been there.

Yeah BYU has quietly been a really solid program under Bronco. They usually wind up upsetting (or scaring the hell out of) at least one big opponent per season.

Democratic Pirate
Feb 17, 2010

And they've lately been running the gently caress over Texas, which is awesome.

The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

Pakled posted:

ACC teams front-load the cupcakes on their schedules too. Almost everyone has an FCS and a G5 opponent within the first three weeks, with Louisville being the notable exception.

Until they quit with this 8 conference game nonsense that's basically how it'll stay. There's very little incentive still not to get at least one pay day home game in a year, and until they go totally autonomous G5 teams are going to make their way onto P5 team's schedules.

Personally (although it would impact the FCS budgets) excluding them from play and requiring P5/G5 opponents I think is the way to go. With 3 OOC games that gives you space to play a bottom feeder, a marquee game, and another whatever you wanted without it being overly embarrassing to watch.

Scarf
Jun 24, 2005

On sight
drat do I wish my coach's name was Bronco.

RumbleFish
Dec 20, 2007

VDay posted:

That's how a lot of teams do it though because they're busy playing conference games or P5 opponents later in the year. It's mostly just the SEC that gives themselves Bye weeks by scheduling Southwestern Chattanooga St in week 12.

I know everyone loves to poo poo on that late-season cupcake since it allows SEC teams to interrupt the conference grind. But most SEC teams play at least one conference opponent in the first three weeks of the year, which is pretty hard in its own right. We tend to play Georgia in Week 2 or 3 and have had SEC/Power 5 openers on top of that as well.

Scarf
Jun 24, 2005

On sight

RumbleFish posted:

I know everyone loves to poo poo on that late-season cupcake since it allows SEC teams to interrupt the conference grind. But most SEC teams play at least one conference opponent in the first three weeks of the year, which is pretty hard in its own right. We tend to play Georgia in Week 2 or 3 and have had SEC/Power 5 openers on top of that as well.

gently caress, this year is the first in a long while where we've started out with a non-power 5 (SEC specifically) opponent. Auburn 3 years in a row, home and home with UGA... Even next year we start a home and home with Auburn again. I think in 2017 we start with Kent St., then have to host Auburn.

VDay
Jul 2, 2003

I'm Pacman Jones!

RumbleFish posted:

I know everyone loves to poo poo on that late-season cupcake since it allows SEC teams to interrupt the conference grind. But most SEC teams play at least one conference opponent in the first three weeks of the year, which is pretty hard in its own right. We tend to play Georgia in Week 2 or 3 and have had SEC/Power 5 openers on top of that as well.

While I'm not going to pretend that those games aren't difficult, the flip side of playing tough games early on is that those losses don't hurt as much as if you had lost in week 12/13. Your guy's 20 point loss to A&M last year, for example, bumped you down from like #9 in the country to #21. A big fall, but still recoverable. It also conveniently boosted A&M's ranking up to the top 10 because hey if they beat a highly ranked SEC team then they must be incredible! To be clear I'm not going to hate on the SEC for taking advantage of the system that rewards them for their scheduling shenanigans, but to pretend that they're not scheduling games the way they are for a very specific purpose is kind of silly.


In random UCLA news, Mora made a "major personal financial commitment" to the new football facility, which bodes well for us wrt him leaving any time soon. Sounds a lot like what Graham did at ASU last year. No idea what the amount is but apparently it's the biggest donation ever by a current head coach, and some fuzzy math and guesstimating puts the figure at at least $500k. I'm going to be really bummed when Mora eventually leaves and we go back to being a dumpster team for another decade and a half.

Speaking of being bummed out, Adidas unveiled this year's alternate black uniforms for us. Spoiler alert they're black, have a barely-visible barb wire pattern, and have lines through everything because Adidas still thinks that looks awesome.




At least they can't do anything with the helmets to screw them up I guess.

Spiritus Nox
Sep 2, 2011


What is Adidas' fascination with meaningless visual noise?

RumbleFish
Dec 20, 2007

VDay posted:

While I'm not going to pretend that those games aren't difficult, the flip side of playing tough games early on is that those losses don't hurt as much as if you had lost in week 12/13. Your guy's 20 point loss to A&M last year, for example, bumped you down from like #9 in the country to #21. A big fall, but still recoverable. It also conveniently boosted A&M's ranking up to the top 10 because hey if they beat a highly ranked SEC team then they must be incredible! To be clear I'm not going to hate on the SEC for taking advantage of the system that rewards them for their scheduling shenanigans, but to pretend that they're not scheduling games the way they are for a very specific purpose is kind of silly.

I understand that argument, but think it held more weight in the BCS era. Given that the playoff polls don't arrive until Week 9 and aren't beholden to what other ranking outfits are doing, this could/should be less of a concern. (In theory, anyway -- I guess we'll see how well that bears out.) I'm also not trying to turn a blind eye to the SEC's machinations. Just pointing out that the conference can and does schedule difficult stretches of games, which for some reason tends to get lost in the outrage over late-season cupcakes.

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Ghost of Reagan Past
Oct 7, 2003

rock and roll fun

korrandark posted:

Did you see their 2016 schedule so far? :stare:
There are 11 teams on the schedule so far. 10 made bowl games last year. 4 made New Years bowls.

If that's not the toughest schedule in the country in 2016 I'd be seriously surprised.

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