Comic Strip Megathread XV: So smile, Margo, and move on.

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Comic Strip Megathread XV: So smile, Margo, and move on.

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Sweaty IT Nerd: Jul 13, 2007

I'll blast a text on this gizmo here, hold on.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 15:39

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# ? May 24, 2024 23:09

Shugojin: Sep 6, 2007; THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...

Julet Esqu posted:

Luann

The current state of Luann's room is meaningless. Long term maintenance of your personal space is not the same as a one-time cleanup of somebody else's space. I hope Luann and her pals are good with a bucket of spackle!

I hope they're good at performing structural maintenance because I saw that warehouse and it doesn't look sound.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 15:47

goatface: Dec 5, 2007; I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.; Grimey Drawer

ZeeToo posted:

Pearls Before Swine

I wonder how he'll turn it into a bad pun.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 15:52

Evil Mastermind: Apr 28, 2008

Shugojin posted:

I hope they're good at performing structural maintenance because I saw that warehouse and it doesn't look sound.

I hope they don't actually spend a lot of time repairing the place, since TJ's probably going to burn it down for the insurance money.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 15:53

flavor.flv: Apr 18, 2008; I got a letter from the government the other day
opened it, read it
it said they was bitches

You thought you were safe? Think Again Comix.

Pooch Caf�

Would you say she came to the wrong neighbourhood?

Ballard Street

There's a trend on Ballard street of people making tiny models of whatever they're currently thinking about. Once again I find myself belonging on Ballard street.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 15:53

dr_rat: Jun 4, 2001

Shugojin posted:

I hope they're good at performing structural maintenance because I saw that warehouse and it doesn't look sound.

I hope they all get bitten by rabid bats in the ceiling and die, but to each their own.

A good anti rabies PSA as well as a fitting way to end Lunna.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:04

Johnny Aztec: Jan 30, 2005; by Hand Knit

Shugojin posted:

I hope they're good at performing structural maintenance because I saw that warehouse and it doesn't look sound.

Hey, why pay someone when you can plop down some cheap pizzas and your daughters retarded friends will do menial labor for nothing!
They can get the bulk of it, remove any trash/debris, and give the place a good scrub.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:16

EasyEW: Mar 8, 2006; I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.

Skippy (June 19, 1928)

Ed Milliband feels Uncle Louie's pain.

Peanuts (August 20, 1968)

gently caress You, Les Moore

IT'S LISA STORY. IT'S ALWAYS LISA'S STORY. :suicide:

Wonder how Cayla feels about having the back end of her anniversary present delayed by Ghostwife Revisited? Going to China to see it roll off the presses was supposed to be their vacation this year.

Rip Haywire

Out Our Way (September 28-29, 1927)

Comics Kingdom went rear end-over-elbows, so Thimble Theater isn't here yet. Check back later.

EasyEW fucked around with this message at 16:28 on Aug 18, 2015

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:19

Mr. Squishy: Mar 22, 2010; A country where you can always get richer.

EasyEW posted:

That's certainly a man getting gunned down in the funny pages.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:30

flavor.flv: Apr 18, 2008; I got a letter from the government the other day
opened it, read it
it said they was bitches

J.R. Williams was not afraid to tell it like it is. Was. Whatever, point is he's cool.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:35

Green Intern: Dec 29, 2008; Loon, Crazy and Laughable

EasyEW posted:

gently caress You, Les Moore

When you start cracking wise about writing yet another dead cancerwife book, maybe you're not really sad about it anymore and you just like money?

EasyEW posted:

That is a lot of people to fit into that one carriage.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:36

Selachian: Oct 9, 2012

EasyEW posted:

IT'S LISA STORY. IT'S ALWAYS LISA'S STORY.

Wonder how Cayla feels about having the back end of her anniversary present delayed by Ghostwife Revisited? Going to China to see it roll off the presses was supposed to be their vacation this year.

It's not really clear what Les means here: are they going to wait for him to finish Lisa's Story II: The Lisaning, and bring both books out together? Or are they going to actually add the new material to the existing book?

Both of those are ridiculous, anyway. Delaying the book means the publisher has to deal with annoyed printers and vendors who were expecting the book to come out at the promised time, and it fucks with your scheduling and budgeting, so you don't do it lightly. And adding new material to a book that's about to go to press is unthinkable -- you only change a book at that stage for massive showstopper errors, not because the writer wanked out a bunch more pages.

Maybe if Les was some hybrid of J. K. Rowling, Stephen King, and John Updike, a publisher would be willing to go to extraordinary lengths like these for him. But he's, well, Les.

(Yeah, I wasted a good chunk of my life in publishing.)

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:44

Endless Mike: Aug 13, 2003

Is Lisa's pre-cancer life really that interesting that it needs a book written about it?

No. No it's not.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:45

SomeMathGuy: Oct 4, 2014; The people were ASTONISHED at his doctrine.

EasyEW posted:

gently caress You, Les Moore

Oh god that loving time travel dream arc was building up to this. I should've known.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 16:46

goatface: Dec 5, 2007; I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.; Grimey Drawer

The publisher has actually canned the book after a market reappraisal. Les' agent is just too embarrassed to tell him

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:01

EasyEW: Mar 8, 2006; I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.

Selachian posted:

about publishing

A key point that TomBat obviously hopes we forgot: the Cayla book is a graphic novel published by a vanity press. Wouldn't the only reason for cancelling a vanity press project be that the author's check didn't clear?

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:05

GorfZaplen: Jan 20, 2012

Mandrake the Magician

The Phantom

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:17

Evil Mastermind: Apr 28, 2008

EasyEW posted:

gently caress You, Les Moore

IT'S LISA STORY. IT'S ALWAYS LISA'S STORY.

Wonder how Cayla feels about having the back end of her anniversary present delayed by Ghostwife Revisited? Going to China to see it roll off the presses was supposed to be their vacation this year.

What kind of reality is this that the American people want more information about Lisa?

I just...I don't understand.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:25

greatn: Nov 15, 2006; by Lowtax

Kind of hosed up that Luciphor was going to take Narda as his wife by force, but I'm totally on his side of wanting to kill the hell out of these assholes.

This is a place of peace and love and acceptance and you need to get the gently caress out of here.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:26

goatface: Dec 5, 2007; I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.; Grimey Drawer

Are they going to have a cook off? Will there be a secret ingredient revealed by a man who is far too enthusiastic?

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:31

dirksteadfast: Oct 10, 2010

goatface posted:

Are they going to have a cook off? Will there be a secret ingredient revealed by a man who is far too enthusiastic?

IRON CUISINE!*

*In the Bandar tongue

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:45

ikanreed: Sep 25, 2009; I honestly I have no idea who cannibal[SIC] is and I do not know why I should know.

syq dude, just syq!

Kipawa is going to win, but discover a newfound respect for Guran and yield leadership. That's obviously where this is going.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:49

Green Intern: Dec 29, 2008; Loon, Crazy and Laughable

goatface posted:

Are they going to have a cook off? Will there be a secret ingredient revealed by a man who is far too enthusiastic?

If it's a cook off, Guran will win. He's clearly taste-tested enough food.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 17:51

Julet Esqu: May 6, 2007

Endless Mike posted:

Is Lisa's pre-cancer life really that interesting that it needs a book written about it?

No. No it's not.

She did have a rape baby. I'm sure Les could make some hay out of that.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 18:53

Murdstone: Jun 14, 2005; I'm feeling Jimmy

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

Mark Trail

I think Mark's buddy is from Metaluna.

Manuel Calavera posted:

Compu-Toon

Other than the awkward but not-quite-incorrect phrasing, this is really good for Boyce.

EasyEW posted:

Out Our Way (September 28-29, 1927)

The social results of poor distribution of wealth in society?

# ? Aug 18, 2015 19:34

goatface: Dec 5, 2007; I had a video of that when I was about 6.

I remember it being shit.; Grimey Drawer

The gunmen in the first panel haven't even shot anybody. They were a better class of bandit.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 19:38

Evil Mastermind: Apr 28, 2008

Julet Esqu posted:

She did have a rape baby. I'm sure Les could make some hay out of that.

Wait, what? Is that the daughter with one arm for whatever reason?

# ? Aug 18, 2015 20:03

BigDave: Jul 14, 2009; Taste the High Country

Evil Mastermind posted:

Wait, what? Is that the daughter with one arm for whatever reason?

I thought it was one of the two blonde twins who almost hosed.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 20:41

Darthemed: Oct 28, 2007; "A data unit?
For me?"; College Slice

Calvin and Hobbes

Ripley's

Fish-man's expression is creeping me out.

# ? Aug 18, 2015 21:37

BlankIsBeautiful: Apr 4, 2008; Feeling a little inadequate?

Johnny Walker posted:

I think Mark's buddy is from Metaluna.

My god, you're right! Ken's forehead is approximately half the size of his entire face!

# ? Aug 18, 2015 21:46

EasyEW: Mar 8, 2006; I've got my father's great big six-shooter with me 'n' if anybody in this woods wants to start somethin' just let 'em--but they DASSN'T.

Thimble Theater finally came in from the rain. And appropriately enough, it's singing "Pennies From Heaven". (March 6, 1929)

Peanuts: Year Three (February 2-4, 1953)

# ? Aug 18, 2015 21:49

Stultus Maximus: Dec 21, 2009; USPOL May

Julet Esqu posted:

Luann

The current state of Luann's room is meaningless. Long term maintenance of your personal space is not the same as a one-time cleanup of somebody else's space. I hope Luann and her pals are good with a bucket of spackle!

And familiar with EPA and OSHA requirements for the removal of lead paint and asbestos!

# ? Aug 18, 2015 23:05

Slammy: Mar 30, 2011; Great speech.
PPHPFT!!

Rarebit Fiend (click for huge)

Outbusts of Everett True

Fritzi Ritz

Sick, Sick, Sick (click for big)

Text: A Statement by the Editors
We assure our readers that no labor issue is involved in this paper�s controversy with Jules Feiffer, ex-Voice cartoonist. We resent the actions taken by Mr. Feiffer�s partisans who invaded our offices last Tuesday and chained themselves to the publisher�s desk. How does it look for the publisher to call up Mayor Wagner when all around him some crazy people are singing �Solidarity Forever!�?
We are in debt to the mounted police for their speedy assistance. Regrettably, one of our editors was arrested by mistake, and by the time we got him out they already had him confessing to several crimes on Long Island.
Despite the cries of �R-A-T spells Scab,� hurled at him by his West 3rd Street contemporaries, Alvin Camus (age 5) assures us he will continue his cartoon. We salute his courage.

Text: A Statement by the Editors
Alvin Camus (age 5) has left our pages for greener pastures. Fans of his may view him in future weeks as a contestant on �The $64,000 Question.� His category will be Dr. Spock. We wish him whatever luck he deserves. His predecessor now resumes in this space.

Wee Pals

# ? Aug 18, 2015 23:41

Julet Esqu: May 6, 2007

Evil Mastermind posted:

Wait, what? Is that the daughter with one arm for whatever reason?

Originally it was just a baby she gave up for adoption after getting Teen Pregnant. Eventually it was revealed that one of those two blondes was the long lost baby.

Recently Batiuk decided that story didn't provide enough pathos/sullied St. Lisa's perfect purity, so he retconned that Lisa was date raped. Just to make sure we all know that the father/rapist was an evil pig not worthy of Lisa's attention (and not just a dumb kid with a tenuous grasp of what constitutes consent), he had the guy come back to meet his kid and be an rear end in a top hat the whole time. Thus we can be assured that it was RAPE rape and not, you know, "rape."

(Just in case it's not completely clear, I'm not trying to trivialize date rape. I am trying to trivialize Batiuk's stupid attention grab of a story.)

# ? Aug 19, 2015 00:22

Medenmath: Jan 18, 2003

# ? Aug 19, 2015 01:03

SomeMathGuy: Oct 4, 2014; The people were ASTONISHED at his doctrine.

Evil Mastermind posted:

Wait, what? Is that the daughter with one arm for whatever reason?

That'd be Becky, she used to date and/or be married to Wally, and lost her arm in a car crash (I think because she was going to go to school for music and, well, Batiuk). IIRC she's not actually directly related to any other cast members, aside from now being married to the comic store owner.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 02:07

BigDave: Jul 14, 2009; Taste the High Country

SomeMathGuy posted:

That'd be Becky, she used to date and/or be married to Wally, and lost her arm in a car crash (I think because she was going to go to school for music and, well, Batiuk). IIRC she's not actually directly related to any other cast members, aside from now being married to the comic store owner.

And she lost her arm after going on a ride w/Funky, who was DWI.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 02:55

Evil Mastermind: Apr 28, 2008

quote:

Funky Winkerbean stuff

The thing that really pisses me off the most is that Batuik clearly thinks he's an amazing writer when he's really one of the hackiest hacks that ever hacked a hack.

He legit does not seem to get that there's more to drama than just having terrible things happen to his characters. He won't let them be happy or get a win once in a while.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 03:00