BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

Pick'em: Champs lose

Draft: I have two seconds and a huge roster, anybody in the first want to move back?

e: Spreadsheet for the new page because I'm not a jerk.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:32

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# ? May 27, 2024 20:39

Zodiac5000: Jun 19, 2006; Protects the Pack!; Doctor Rope

Pick'em: Champs retain

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:42

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

Super-League XVII, Week 10: A Buncha, Muncha, Cruncha, Update!

Games of the Week

Don May posted:

WOLVERINES DEFEAT KERNELS 7-1, CBX INVESTED WITH HARDCORE AND LARKIN-DOWNING CHAMPIONSHIPS

Mitchell- It wasn't much of a game.

The Kernels, distracted and not all that concerned with the Wolverines, a team they had held off the divisional race on several occasions, played about as poorly as they were capable of, and the Wolverines, wanting a taste of the gold, played as well as they could, and earned a 7-1 decision today, capturing the Hardcore and Larkin-Downing titlings.

For cbx, however, it was not enough to win the titles. Feeling disrespected by the Super-League after season upon season of slights directed towards him and his team, he forced Smasher Dynamo, under an obscure Super-League bylaw, to hold a formal coronation ceremony to mark his team's capture of the titles. The Super-League Commissar protested, noting that such a ceremony had been obsolete for many seasons, and was very time consuming, but cbx insisted.

As is tradition, the ceremony began with the outgoing title-owner, CFBalla, who, per custom, was charging with giving a concession speech. "As the owner of the vanquished team," CFBalla said, reading from note cards, "I hereby officially, and without recourse, relinquish the INSERT NAME OF TITLE to cbx." CFBalla looked at the notecard. "Hey, wait, was I suppose to say the name of the title there? I think I probably was supposed to say the name of the title there. Okay, let me start over." CFBalla cleared his throat. "I hereby officially, and without recourse, relinquish the Hardcore Championship and Larkin-Downing Heroism Award to c-bizzle." CFBalla laughed at the nickname he had given cbx. "No? That's not good? I have to do it again? Okay, fine. I'll take it serious this time. I hereby officially, and without recourse, relinquish the Hardcore Championship and Darkin-Lowning Award to cbx. I do so in-" CFBalla stopped and looked at Smasher, who was shaking his head. "What?"

"Darkin-Lowning?" Smasher asked.

"Oh, holy gently caress, is that I what I said? Oh, man, where is my head at today?" CFBalla took a moment, and then tried again. "I hereby officially, and without recourse, relinquish the Hardcore Championship and Larkin-Downing Heroism Award to cbx. I do so in recognition that cbx has best my team at the game of baseball, and that he, therefore, has proven himself the better team owner and better human being. May he have a long and prosperous reign, and may Marduk heap blessings on his team." CFBalla stopped. "What, no, that's right." CFBalla turned a notecard to the audience. "See, it says 'Marduk'. That's part of the speech, that's not a mistake our anything." CFBalla turned to Smasher. "Am I done now?" He asked.

"Yeah."

"Neat." CFBalla handed Smasher the titles and walked off stage. It was now Smasher Dynamo's job to properly introduce and fete the new champions. "From time immemorial." Smasher began with the bare minimum of enthusiasm. "From time immemorial, the Super-League has been about producing champions, team that shine above and beyond those of other teams. Today, I honor a new star shining the heavens of the Super-League, as a team has proven itself among those immortals. As the Commissar of the Super-League, I hereby, with much pride and admiration, award the Hardcore Championship and Larkin-Downing Heroism Award to cbx, owner of the Detroit Wolverines. Please, cbx, come now, so that I may give these treasures."

At that, it was time for cbx to finally make his entrance. The speakers began to blare James Brown's "Living in America" as cbx slowly emerged on an elevator rising from a trapdoor on the stage. cbx, treating the moment with the solemnity it deserved, was dressed in a red, white and blue suit, along with a star-spangled top hat. As he finally reached the stage level, an enormous amount of pyrotechnics erupted behind him, and he posed for several minutes, caught up in the moment, before tossing his top hat into the crowd and dancing to the stage, ready to receive his titles.

Smasher, just wanting to leave, hurriedly dumped them on cbx and then got out of their as quickly as possible. cbx then assumed control of the mic, "This isn't a win for me, it's a win for AMERICA! Who here loves America?" He asked. The crowd gave a polite response. "I said, WHO HERE LOVES AMERICA?" cbx asked more loudly, the crowd, wanting all of this to be over, gave a better response, hoping cbx would accept it and move on. "That's right, we all love America. And that's why I am so proud to have gotten these titles back to the real America, away from CFBalla, who, let's be honest, is as American as Quiche Lorraine." The audience did not pick up that that was supposed to be a laugh line. "Ever since I was a small child, I loved America, and wanted nothing more than to achieve the American dream. And through hard work, sacrifice, and integrity, I have become a true example of what you can achieve if you are willing to fight for it. I see a lot of people out there, I won't name names, but Monicro, Armitage, CraigK, they're all pretty high on the list, who wonder why they can't be as successful as someone like me, why America seems to be holding them back. But, in reality, it's not Anerica who's holding them back, it's them who are letting America down, because they refuse to take advantage of this land of opportunity, and instead just sit around telling everyone how hard it is to build a winning team, they should get off their asses, starting working ten jobs at a time, and then tell me how hard it is! But, let's not dwell on that. Instead, I want to thank everyone who made this possible. There's George Washington and the rest of the founders. Ronald Reagan, of course, the best president, who defeated the Reds once and for all, and American Jesus, who is the Jesus who knows what the real godly country is. Those by name and all others. Thank, and god bless these United States and drat our enemies straight to hell!"

GAME NOTES

-Yaz, you are not a catcher! What are you doing there behind the plate? Oh, look at you, so adorable in your catcher's mask with all of those errors. Well, just make sure that you don't get yourself hurt, okay?

-Considering how old that version of Pedro is, he's not doing that bad. Also, maybe it's just me, but I always think of Pedro as a guy who never won a World Series in his career, and then, a second or two later, remember that he did win one with the 2004 Red Sox. I guess I forget about it because Curt Schilling takes all of the focus in that story.

-Albert Pujols is cooling off a bit, but, seeing as if he hadn't, he'd hit about 75 home runs this season, that doesn't seem all that surprising.

Box Score

The Confession of Robert_Deadford posted:

We would prefer to think of ourselves as good men, who wish no harm to befall others, no matter their trespasses against us. And yet, despite this being the case, we cannot deny entering our series against the Southpaws with no small amount of malice towards Pander.

We have spent a great deal of time and energy building the Krakow Dragons, honing them, making them a team that could contend in the Smasher League. Not two seasons past, we were poised to reach the Finals for the first time in our history, one game away, when the treacherous gingemidget stole our glory and immolated our dreams, and also ourselves personally.

No matter, for we were a resilient team, and not ones to give up. For if we were, then we could hardly be a team that represented the indomitable spirit of the Polish people, who, though conquered by their foes time and time again, would never give up, and instead rise up and up, even if each time they rose up, historically speaking, it would just lead to them being conquered again. In fairness, when one found a country between the Germans and the Russians, there will likely be some difficulties in not being conquered.

The Southpaws were a problem. We knew this, and we could not ignore it. They were an evil team created by an evil mind who sought to leave the league as little more than a blackened patch of ashes. Pander is not, in our estimation, a mind capable of kindness or even neutrality, his is a mind that constantly races to find new ways to cause harm to others. With gingemidget, there is a sense that his hatred of us was due to contingency and a long-standing need to prove himself. Pander merely wishes to see all suffer.

And what choice did we have? We could not afford to lose more games. The last-place team in the Norris-Smythe Division has received reprieves in the past, but we did not feel as if one would be forthcoming this season. We are a better team than the Crows, of that we have no doubt, but fate has conspired to lay us low in the early going, and we found ourselves mired in last place, ill-able to afford a thrashing from the Southpaws.

And yet, we entered this series hoping that we might be able to turn the tide on the Southpaws, who would be forced to travel to Wawel. In our own home, perhaps we could cut the Southpaws down to size, pick up the wins we so desperately needed, and set all things to right.

The first game of the series disabused us of those notions. Even without Eddie Collins, the Southpaws' attack is relentless. We cannot claim to understand what fuels it. This collection of second-tier players and hangers-on should not be effective. They should lose. Early and often. But they do not. It puzzled us, angered us, made us question our conception of the Super-League. With two more games in the series, though, we knew that we could not afford to be swept at this time, and so we were forced to do what we had to in order to prevail.

New Hoss is the engine that powers my team. It is the reality of the situation, even if relying on one player that can only pitch once every five days does carry with it certain risks. but they are risk we have accepted. Against the Southpaws, though, we worried that New Hoss, mighty though he was, could not prevail, as his atomic-powered pitching cannon was mounted on the right-side, giving the advantage to left-handed hitters, of which the Southpaws had a virtually unlimited supply. We could not afford to lose this game, we could not afford to let the world see the Southpaws defeat our best player in our own stadium. To do so would deprive us, and all of our subjects, of all remaining morale, a complete destruction of our elan. This we could not allow.

And so we gave the order to overclock the processors in New Hoss' arm, and to remove the governors that had kept his machinery from performing to their full power. But these restraints were put in place for a reason. To use New Hoss on full power would not only destroy New Hoss, but also potentially hurt many more, as, from what we have been told, attempting to turbo-charge a nuclear reactor can lead to unfortunte consequences. Given the amount of fissile material in New Hoss' reactor, it would be the end of the Dragons. But we pressed on, for if we could not win this game, then we were better as nothing more than irradiated debris, and, in the worst-case scenario, at least we could destroy the Southpaws as well. That would have been fitting, we think, given that, by training, Pander is a man well-versed to using nuclear power as a weapon.

But New Hoss did not explode. He thrived, and the Southpaws were defeated. And now that we have proven that we are capable of defeating even the strongest team in the Super-League, once more do my subjects believe that we can retake third place at the least, and prevent an unjust demotion. And so we have no regrets over our actions, only regrets that we have been pushed so far.

We are a good man. And now we must destroy the Crows, because that, in this cruel league, is what good men must do.

Box Score

Don May posted:

SHEIKHS CHOKE LIFE OUT OF NINE, WIN 7-3

Animeland!- Realistically speaking, there are things that a team can and can't get away with if they want to survive.

Holding a tie against the Sheikhs, with two outs in the bottom of the ninth, the Slaughterhouse Nine found themselves with a golden opportunity. For reasons that defy rational explanation, Buck Leonard had been taken out of the game and replaced with Mickey Tettleton, likely the easiest out on the Sheikhs. In his first at-bat, Tettleton had struck out on three pitches, and there was no reason to think that he would do any better this time up. Get Tettleton out, the game would head into the bottom of the ninth still tied, and the Nine would be able to win the game with a single run. With the Wolverines surging, or as close to surging as they can get, and the Dinos being mildly threatening, it was not a chance the Nine could pass up.

And that's when Mickey Tettleton hit a three-run shot to give the Sheikhs a 6-3 lead. That the Sheikhs added another run on a Roger Breshnahan triple didn't matter, nor did the fact that the Nine had one last chance in the bottom of the ninth to tie or beat the Sheikhs. Once Tettleton hit that home run, the game was effectively over, because there was simply no way that Nine could come back from that.

"It's a win, and I'm glad to have the win, but, for the life of me, I can't understand how Mickey Tettleton got into the game." Beet said afterwards. "I've checked around, and everyone is saying that I'm making these substitutions that keep putting Tettleton into the field, but it's not something I remember doing."

"MACHINE may have an explanation." MACHINE offered. "MACHINE has been using holographic array and vocal modulator to create false image of Beet that will put Tettleton into the game."

Beet was shocked. "What? Why did you do that? That's bad! Do you understand how that's bad? Yeah, we won the game today, but putting Tettleton in the field is super-dangerous. If we were in the DH league, maybe things would be different, but as it stands, using Tettleton is risky. RCMP are looming out there, just waiting to take this division, and whatever DannoMack is doing in Belfast, well, I don't know, I just know that nothing good ever came out of Belfast. I'm getting off track. Why are you putting Tettleton into games, MACHINE?"

"Tettleton is player with low batting average who hits for power, draws walks, and plays a premium defensive position. Tettleton is like MACHINE. Tettleton is only player MACHINE knows who is like MACHINE."

"That's really something." Beet tried to moderate his response, "But I wouldn't get too attached, when the Pirates come back, Tettleton will be gone."

"That makes MACHINE feel, MACHINE believes that humans call it sadness."

"Sadness is an important part of the human experience, it's best to get used to it." Beet explained.

"MACHINE had no interest in human experience or becoming human. MACHINE believes you are conflating its experience with the depiction of other robots in fiction, written by humans, that imply that robots have strong desire to be more human as a result of anthropocentric views of human writers."

"Beet-kun! Machine-chan!" Monicro excitedly ran up.

Beet grabbed Monicro by the collar, "The gently caress did you just call me?"

"B-Beet-kun?"

Beet let Monicro down, "That's that Japanese stuff, isn't it?" Beet asked, "You need to be a bit more careful on how you say it, I guess."

"Right, Beet-Kun. Anyway, I wanted to show you a drawing I made. It's of this super-cool mecha that I call the Gundamonicro." Monicro handed Beet the drawing, which he took a glance at as MACHINE skittered around to get a look as well.

"Are you married to that name?" Beet said, still looking at the drawing.

"Kind of." Monicro said.

"MACHINE has questions for the spawn." MACHINE said, directing its unblinking lenses at Monicro.

Beet kept looking at the drawing, trying to make sense of it. "We usually call them 'children'."

"MACHINE will comply. Children-Monicro, MACHINE must raise questions regarding engineering of prototype Gundamonicro. MACHINE notes presence of large multi-barrelled gatling-gun apparatus located in chest."

"There are two of them! Because that way, if you get into trouble, you pop open the chest plates and just shoot away." Monicro mimed shooting bullets out of his chest.

"MACHINE understands basic conception. MACHINE finds fault with design. Volume of chest cavity compared to size of the machine would require that, for maximum efficiency, power reactor be located in there. MACHINE's concern is that to fit weapons of this size in chest, power reactor would need to be reduced in size and capacity. Further, MACHINE's understand is that the guns in chest fire solid-ammunition carrying explosive element, correct, Children-Monicro?"

"Totes."

"MACHINE is concerned that having weapon in that location, with the attendant ammunition stores to feed said weapon, in so close proximity to primary power reaction carries with it incredible risk of chain reaction that would lead to complete destruction of Gundamonicro, and, assuming you were pilot, located in chamber directly under chest cavity, your irreversible death."

"Well, I mean." Monicro thought about it. "You're right. The Gundamonicro would be a death-trap. Well, back to the drawing board."

GAME NOTES

-MICKEY TETTTLETON! The extra 't' is for how tterrific he was.

-Get a real bullpen, Monicro. Please, if not for me, then do it for the dashed dream that is Gundamonicro.

-Roger Bresnahan is the fastest catcher that ever was! A stolen base! A triple! Truly, an amazing man. And he didn't have an error in this game! He's doing it all, folks!

Box Score

Don May posted:

BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO KOBE CROWS, COMMISSION WIN 10-7

St. Paul- Poor HulkaMatt.

It's received wisdom that when a team is up by four runs, they don't use their closer in the ninth inning. The thinking is that it's not a save situation, and there is little need to use the best relief pitcher on your team when the other team has such a poor chance of making the comeback.

And so, instead of David Robertson starting the inning, the Crows turned to Ugueth Urbina, who, as history showed, had trouble closing out a murder even with a machete in hand, to get them the final three outs. The inning did not start well, with Big Oh getting a single. But Urbina felt like he had things under control. In fact, he felt so confident that he decided to start the next at-bat, with Albert Pujols at the plate, with a challenge fastball down the middle.

It is assumed that, at some point, that ball's orbit will decay and it will burn up in the Earth's upper atmosphere.

With the lead now down to 7-5, HulkaMatt decided to see where Urbina was going with this. As it turns out, Urbina did have a little gas left in the tank, getting two quick outs. And then he let Cristobal Torriente reach base on an infield single, and HulkaMatt, having finally seen enough, brought in David Robertson, who walked Eddie Mathews, which was bad, and then walekd Chick Hafey to lead the bases, which was worse. And then gave up a two-run single to Johnny Pesky, which tied the game. Robertson then got the last out to force extra innings but, at that point, you have to wonder whether that was a kindness to the Crows at all.

To no one's surprise, the Crows failed to score in the top of the tenth inning, and that gave the Commission another chance to put the Crows out of their misery. Robertson, in for another inning of work, did get two innings, but also allowed two baserunners. Then again, with two outs, that didn't matter so long as Robertson could get an out from Torriente. Unfortunately, he could not, and those baserunners became meaningless in an entirely different way when Torriente jacked the ball over the left field fence, the Commission talking the walk-off win and the Crows finding yet another way to lose the game.

The Goog spoke first at the post-game press conference, "You know, dogs, I just want to say, we should be ashamed of losing to a team that started a French teenage girl at shortstop. There's no shame in that."

"What?" HulkaMat cut him off, "Okay, before we get into the rest of this bidness, let me make it clear that we should definitely feel shame about that. A lot of shame."

"It's some Invicta-class shame." kensei agreed. "It's Miesha Tate vs. Rin Nakai level shame."

"I don't know what means." The Goog said, "But, like we've lost to Yoshida before, and moved on, right?"

"That's different, because how much does a reliever matter?" Asked HulkaMatt before realizing the course of this very game, "Well, it doesn't matter much when you compare it to a starting position player. A starting position player that can't hit! And I respect the French people. Derrida? Great philosopher! Foucault? Man can discipline and punish me all he likes. Marcel Proust? I ever had a spare 15 years, I'd def get around to reading Remembrance of Things Past. But losing to Melissa Meyeux? That hurts. I'm hurt. And Rickey's hurt. Moose, what are our legal options about that? Is there, like, some sort of lawsuit I can file to make Rickey not hurt?"

"Well, according to the law, I think you can file a wrongful death suit." Moose said in his expert opinion. "I think I've heard of things like that."

"Doesn't he need to be dead for that to work?" The Goog asked.

"I don't think he has to necessarily be dead, just legally dead." Moose said. "So, like we can get him declared dead, and then sue."

HulkaMatt rubbed his chin, "Okay, well, I don't know, something about this doesn't seem quite right, but how do we do that?"

"The thing about that, you see..." Moose trailed off, "Is that it's a very complicated question what you're asking, there are a lot of moving parts. I mean, there are procedures, and forms, and a whole bunch of stuff that needs to work for that to happen."

"Well, I guesss, get on it, or something." HulkaMatt said, defeated. "And we probably should put someone better than Jason Giambi in left field in the meantime."

"We should probably start drinking too." The Goog suggested.

"Yeah, I guess we should probably do that too."

And they did.

GAME NOTES

-Stan got five hits! And can play LF! And will almost certainly be playing LF in the very near future for the Crows, assuming that HulkaMatt is not driven completely catatonic by this latest update, which seems like it has a very good chance of happening.

-Robertson is no Rivera, that's for sure.

-Big Oh has four triples. That's not exactly how I designed him, but it's where we are.

-There, Torriente is working, Turkey Stearnes on the Marmosets is working, and now the Triad owes me. Unfortunatly, they have nothing I want.

-This update rendered short due to exigent circumstances.

Box Score

Team Statistics

Analysis

The revolution is gaining strength!

Analysis

This team!

Analysis

The Wolverines are outperforming their pythag record by a dangerous amount.

Analysis

Is the Kid really the guy?

Analysis

It's unfortunate that this team is treading the water when it could be picking up ground.

Analysis

We could debate what you should be doing to save your team, but I think that replacing Mathews' .173 batting average is probably up there.

Analysis

Why can't this team play to its potential? I blame poor leadership.

Analysis

Hilton Smith is a-coming back soon.

Analysis

It's about time the Doom got back on track.

Analysis

Actually, despite how crushing that loss in the Game of the Week was, the Crows have mostly managed to stop their slide.

Analysis

TheMcD, FIX IT! Do it for FairGame!

Analysis

The Dragons haven't had a bad start, but it's not a fatal one.

Analysis

This team continues to impress me by not dying a terrible death. That's something.

Analysis

Everyone has a bad week now and then.

Analysis

Is it time for Plan REGGIE?

Analysis

Dear Bombers,

Please be better so that mentholmoose won't be as angry at me.

Your pal,

Smasher D.

Analysis

On the one hand, sweeping a team with three one-run games is kind of fluky. But, hey, the Rakers are back in first.

Analysis

Are you a bad enough dude to take your division back?

Analysis

Pass.

Analysis

The great Tanana experiment didn't go perfectly.

Analysis

It turns out then when almost half of your lineup is from a team that won 125 games, your team is going to do okay.

Analysis

Over .500 is an improvement, I suppose.

Analysis

These things happen.

Analysis

At least you aren't in last place.

Standings

# ? Sep 22, 2015 20:49

Pash: Sep 10, 2009; The First of the Adorable Dead

Hmm... this is nice, lets hope this can keep going. Considering the is the least optimistic I have been going into a season with the Commission this is quite shocking... Or maybe it just means I' don't know what I'm doing...

DL Collins
Call up Lyn Lary to sit on the bench.

Lineups:
DH vs RHP:
1. Joe Jackson LF
2. Roger Connor DH
3. Big Oh! RF
4. Albert Pujols 1B
5. Joe Mauer C
6. Cristobal Torriente CF
7. Eddie Mathews 3B
8. Melissa Meyeux SS
9. Johnny Pesky 2B

DH vs LHP:
1. Roger Connor DH
2. Albert Pujols 1B
3. Big Oh! RF
4. Harmon Killebrew 3B
5. Johnny Bench C
6. Cristobal Torriente CF
7. Chick Hafey LF
8. Ernie Banks SS
9. Johnny Pesky 2B

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:06

TheMcD: May 4, 2013; Monaca / Subject N 2024
---------
Despair will never let you down.
Malice will never disappoint you.

I don't know how to FIX IT! All I can think to do is make changes and hope things get better, but then you get mad at me, and then everything gets worse and nothing is fixed! So maybe if I don't make any changes, things will be good? Let's try that, no changes for this week.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:11

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Let's get Greg Maddux a few more innings. Swap Maddux and Phillippe in the rotation, and change Start on Short Rest to -2. Also, change Pitch through Trouble and High Pitch Counts to +3.

Also, the lineup needs some new blood. Demote Stan Musial, call up Joe Jackson.

Lineup:

code:

2B - Collins
CF - Hamilton
LF - Bonds
RF - Ramirez
SS - Vaughan
DH - McGraw
3B - Santo
C  - Berra/Torre platoon
1B - Jackson

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:38

Forzelt: Jul 23, 2012; Variance? Fuck that noise.

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Analysis

Why can't this team play to its potential? I blame poor leadership.

Yeah, in combination with a terrible bullpen. Swap Cano and Myer. Thanks.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 21:51

Ice To Meet You: Mar 5, 2007

Sub-Par Week 10 Injury Report

Antigua Unspecifieds
Roy Halladay (SP) () - 66 days

Genoa Janus ah gently caress. God drat it
Brian Downing (C) (Sad) - 83 days
Willie Mays (CF) (Sad) - 44 days

Stoned Lightning
Steve Carlton (SP) (The Great Outdoor Fight) - 95 days

# ? Sep 22, 2015 22:13

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

Ice To Meet You posted:

Sub-Par Week 10 Injury Report

Stoned Lightning
Steve Carlton (SP) (The Great Outdoor Fight) - 95 days

Damnit. Call up Larry Dierker to the 4 spot and move Brown to SP3.

# ? Sep 22, 2015 22:32

Armitage: Aug 16, 2005; "Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

I was tempted to use Berkman against RHP this week at first to sit the slumping Olerud, but I think that wouldn't be the best of ideas going up against the Marmosets and Kernals this week.

Also because I don't want Smasher to yell at me.

No changes! Hold the fort for one more week, guys!

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:06

DannoMack: Aug 1, 2003; i love it when you call me big poppa

Dude...

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:30

Grinnblade: Sep 24, 2007

HulkaMatt on Twitter posted:

@grinnblade wait - any reason you WOULDN'T pick a 23yo Teddy ???

<mentholmoose> don't do it
<mentholmoose> take teddy

<mentholmoose> take teddy

<Monicro> Yeah But Ted Williams
<Monicro> (tm)
<mentholmoose> he's ted goddamn williams, pick him

<mentholmoose> grinnblade pick the teddy

okay okay i get the point

The Diamond Dogs select 1941 Ted Williams.

Pungry and the Antarctic Coldplayers are on the clock!

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:47

rabidsquid: Oct 11, 2004; LOVES THE KOG

My Ted Williams is batting .288 :unsmigghh:

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:48

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Pungry, if you want Greg Maddux, now is probably your last chance. You know what you must do.

I'll even give you Hanley Ramirez as well!

# ? Sep 23, 2015 00:52

Ice To Meet You: Mar 5, 2007

rabidsquid posted:

My Ted Williams is batting .288

Not anymore.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 01:01

Monicro: Oct 21, 2010; And you could feel his features in the air
A wide smile and perfect hair
He had complete control of the rising tides
And a medicine bag hanging at his side

In the flowing blue world of the death-dealing physician

Rommell immediately imploded so Swap Rommell and Reardon i guess??

# ? Sep 23, 2015 01:19

Mornacale: Dec 19, 2007; n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

Ice To Meet You posted:

Sub-Par Week 10 Injury Report

Antigua Unspecifieds
Roy Halladay (SP) () - 66 days

Genoa Janus ah gently caress. God drat it
Brian Downing (C) (Sad) - 83 days
Willie Mays (CF) (Sad) - 44 days

Stoned Lightning
Steve Carlton (SP) (The Great Outdoor Fight) - 95 days

lol

# ? Sep 23, 2015 01:39

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

Mornacale posted:

lol

hold on

hold on

i've got something for this

Monathin posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKLmZNnMT0A

there it is

# ? Sep 23, 2015 01:54

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

it took me a minute because i thought mornacale posted that video but i got confused because 40% of this leagues' owners' names start with eithre "mon" or "morn"

# ? Sep 23, 2015 01:56

Mornacale: Dec 19, 2007; n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

Monateam Confusion claims another victim.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 03:17

HulkaMatt: Feb 14, 2006; BIG BICEPS SHOHEI

1.) DL Rickey Henderson. Call up Bernie Williams I guess.

2.) With Rickey out for pretty much the rest of the season, it's time for new lineups:

code:

VS. RHP		                          |  VS. LHP
##    Position	 Player	           R/L/S  |  ##    Position   Player            R/L/S
01    2B         Joe Morgan         [L]   |  01    2B         Nap Lajoie         [R]
02    RF         Ichiro Suzuki      [L]   |  02    LF         Stan Musial        [L]
03    LF         Stan Musial        [L]   |  03    DH         Mickey Mantle      [S]
04    C          Josh Gibson        [R]   |  04    C          Josh Gibson        [R]
05    DH         Mickey Mantle      [S]   |  05    3B         Alex Rodriguez     [R]
06    3B         Alex Rodriguez     [R]   |  06    1B         Jeff Bagwell       [R]
07    CF         Duke Snider        [L]   |  07    CF         Duke Snider        [L]
08    1B         Jeff Bagwell       [R]   |  08    SS         Alan Trammell      [R]
09    SS         Alan Trammell      [R]   |  09    RF         Ichiro Suzuki      [L]

3.) SOON

# ? Sep 23, 2015 04:33

CraigK: Nov 4, 2008; by exmarx

also dunno why you guys think im complainin about my team. theyre doing fine. everybody has to deal with injuries, and my team is holding itself against a 88-90 win team in the super league that got flukily demoted. c'est bien

# ? Sep 23, 2015 05:31

Mornacale: Dec 19, 2007; n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

SuperChallenge Finals, Game 7: Survival of the Moosest

On the Origin of Comebacks by Means of Run Production, or the Acquisition of Hits and Runs in the Struggle for Wins

Chapter 1: Conditions of a Comeback
WHEN we compare the games of the same variety or sub-variety of our recorded base ball sport, one of the first points which strikes us is, that the type of game known as the "come back". And if we reflect on the vast diversity of the scores and events which pertain to such comebacks, we must also observe that this great variability exists in respect to certain factors which nevertheless remain invariant. We are driven to conclude, therefore, that the excitement of the comeback is due to the admixture of these invariants as well as the accidental elements, and consequently that each class must be worthy of our attention if we endeavor to make a complete study of the phenomen.

Consequently, we will state that the first invariable condition of a comeback is two teams in a state of competition; that the second condition is that some team attains a multiple-run lead over the other; and third, that the other team ultimately gains a tie or the lead. We might further create two separate sub-varieties of the comeback, namely the "successful comeback" and "unsuccessful comeback", which each are subject to an additional invariant condition: a successful comeback requires that the team which began out of the lead finish the game as the victor, whereas an unsuccessful comeback requires that same team ultimately fail to secure the win. The accidents attending to each of these conditions include the particular compositions of the teams, the sequence of events that lead to the various leads.

For instance, in the example of the well-known 7th game of the SuperChallenge Finals between Mentholmoose and Mooseontheloose, the accidents of the first two teams included the following: starter Cy Young versus starter Pedro Martinez; the shared inclusion of Honus Wagner, Babe Ruth, Ted Williams, Stan Musial, & Mariano Rivera; & the presence of Billy Wagner and Rich Gossage in the bull pens. We know that one team must have reached a lead of several runs, the specific manner of which we will relate here:

Firstly, the top of the second began with a Ted Williams double, who was then brought across home by an error by the catcher. This placed a second runner on, who then scored after a Bill Dickey single. Furthermore, the lead was increased in the following inning due to two doubles and a single by Bonds, Williams, and Brett respectively. The Menthol Mooses led with a 4-0 score.

Next, having as our intent to study this phenomenon in depth, we must consider the particular circumstances of Mooseontheloose returning to take the lead. He remained scoreless through the first five innings of the match, but in the sixth inning his team was able to plate three runs: they made successive hits by Hornsby, Ruth, and Williams; then, an error on shortstop Wagner, and eventually a sacrifice fly by Gehrig. Next inning, more small-ball led to a tie score, as pinch runner Mike Trout crossed the plate. And again in the 8th, Billy Wagner was punished for his questionable control by allowing a go-ahead run. After the 8th, Mooseontheloose led 5-4.

Finally, the question of whether the game would qualify as a successful comeback or an unsuccessful comeback. In the top of the 9th, second baseman Rogers Hornsby committed an infamy when he launched a ball into the stands rather than putting out Honus Wagner. When Ruth followed with a triple, the score was once again tied, and it remained to be seen which category the game would fall into. This was determined in the 10th inning by Ted Williams, who misplayed a Jackie Robinson single. After this error, only one more single was needed to bring Robinson around, and it was provided by Ron Santo with two outs. Consequently, the condition for the successful comeback sub-variety was fulfilled.

Tomorrow, the series shifts back to Mentholmoose's home stadium, where he'll try to close Mooseontheloose out before facing the horror of a winner-take-all Game 9. The starters will be Rogers Clemens and Old Hoss Radbourn; they combined for a bizarre 10-9 game in Game 4, so we'll see if Game 8 is similar.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 10:49

Pungry: Feb 26, 2011; JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

The Coldplayers select Ted Williams '42.

For the love of god, please get better soon, '95 Maddux.

BagofDucks is up.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 12:37

Pungry: Feb 26, 2011; JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

Young Vlad to Minors, call up Bobby Abreu. Carl Willis for Daniel Bard, as well.

New Lineups:
VS Righties:
1. Tim Raines, CF
2. Ted Williams, RF
3. Rafael Palmeiro, 1B
4. Fred McGriff, DH
5. Billy Williams, LF
6. Aramis Ramirez, 3B
7. Jackie Robinson, 2B
8. Ivan Rodriguez, C
9. Barry Larkin, SS

VS Lefties:
1. Derrek Lee, 1B
2. Ted Williams, LF
3. Aramis Ramirez, 3B
4. Miguel Cabrera, DH
5. Billy Williams, RF
6. Kirby Puckett, CF
7. Jackie Robinson, 2B
8. Barry Larkin, SS
9. Ivan Rodriguez, C

VS Non-DH:
1. Tim Raines, RF
2. Ted Williams, LF
3. Kirby Puckett, CF
4. Rafael Palmeiro, 1B
5. Aramis Ramirez, 3B
6. Jackie Robinson, 2B
7. Barry Larkin, SS
8. Ivan Rodriguez, C
9. Pitcher

Yeah, I have Derrek Lee leading off, whatever. If we could just float away and fly up to the surface and just start again...

# ? Sep 23, 2015 12:50

Beet: Aug 24, 2003

Alright, let's get things back in order for the rather crucial RCMP series next week.

vs. RHP No DH
1. LF Tim Raines
2. 2B Frankie Frisch
3. 1B Buck Leonard
4. RF Babe Ruth
5. C Roger Bresnahan
6. SS The MACHINE
7. CF Earle Combs
8. 3B Paul Molitor

And, since Tettletonmania won't stop, please further set defensive replacements to -5

# ? Sep 23, 2015 13:53

CFBalla: Sep 16, 2009; Yeah, I just made that shot.

Someone broke George Grantham from last season. Last season he rolled 94 and was doing fine. drat you, random person!!! Or it might be the Super Draft pool. Either way.

Changes:

Replace Darrell Porter with Ted Simmons in all line-ups. Replace Rogers Hornsby with Johnny Pesky in all-lineups. I'll only replace Brett and Masked if they are injured, really. I need them in the line-up.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 15:05

DannoMack: Aug 1, 2003; i love it when you call me big poppa

Smasher will it be too late to post lineup changes (just noticed Cy Young is hurt) when I get home in an hour or two?

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:56

Smasher Dynamo: Oct 16, 2008; ~~Eternal~~ Commissioner of the Super League. A new avatar. A new age, of the same old embittered Smasher that failed to escape the bonds of the SL, FM3, Johnny Hopp and Eri Yoshida "The Knuckle Princess". "The flames of Smasher's ire scorch the skies... Igniting St. Bellhorn's funeral pyre."

DannoMack posted:

Smasher will it be too late to post lineup changes (just noticed Cy Young is hurt) when I get home in an hour or two?

Yes. There are a lot of things I have to do today, and don't really have time to wait.

Super-League XVII, Week 11 Injury Report

CSKA
Rod Carew (2B) (Purged) - 23 days

Detroit Wolverines
Old Hoss Radbourn (SP) (Pressure Test!) - 11 days

Oklahoma City Bombers
Tom Henke (RP) (Terminated) - Out for Season

Rockford Losers
Barry Bonds (LF) (A setback) - 8 days

Pick 'em: Too Late

Canadian Championship
South Dakota Marmosets (c) @ Florida Oranges

Hardcore and Larkin-Downing Championships
Detroit Wolverines (c) @ Sindhi Sheikhs

Grand Slam Championships
Chicago Southpaws (c) @ New World Symphony

# ? Sep 23, 2015 17:16

StupidSexyMothman: Aug 9, 2010

Pick 'em: Too Late

Canadian Championship
Florida Oranges

Hardcore and Larkin-Downing Championships
Sindhi Sheikhs

Grand Slam Championships
New World Symphony

# ? Sep 23, 2015 17:17

Armitage: Aug 16, 2005; "Mathman's not here." "Oh? Where is he?" "He's in the Mathroom."

Pick 'em: And It's Too Late, Baby, Now It's Too Late, Though We Really Did Try To Make It

Canadian Championship
South Dakota Marmosets (c) @ Florida Oranges

Hardcore and Larkin-Downing Championships
Detroit Wolverines (c) @ Sindhi Sheikhs

Grand Slam Championships
Chicago Southpaws (c) @ New World Symphony

# ? Sep 23, 2015 17:22

Pash: Sep 10, 2009; The First of the Adorable Dead

Sheikhs take, rest retain.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 17:22

Forzelt: Jul 23, 2012; Variance? Fuck that noise.

Pick 'em: Too Late

Champs retain

# ? Sep 23, 2015 18:15

TKBomber7285: Feb 20, 2011

Pick 'em: Too Late

Canadian Championship
South Dakota Marmosets (c) @ Florida Oranges

Hardcore and Larkin-Downing Championships
Detroit Wolverines (c) @ Sindhi Sheikhs

Grand Slam Championships
Chicago Southpaws (c) @ New World Symphony

# ? Sep 23, 2015 18:25

Mornacale: Dec 19, 2007; n=y where
y=hope and n=folly,
prospects=lies, win=lose,

self=Pirates

Pash posted:

Sheikhs take, rest retain.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 19:32

Robert Deadford: Mar 1, 2008; Ultra Carp

Pick 'em

Oranges take, otherwise Champs retain

# ? Sep 23, 2015 20:14

mentholmoose: Nov 5, 2009; YKNOW THERES ONLY ONE DIRECTION I KNOW AND THATS DRIVIN STRAIGHT TO THE NET

Smasher Dynamo posted:

Oklahoma City Bombers
Tom Henke (RP) (Terminated) - Out for Season

I'd say this was addition by subtraction but the remaining options might be just as bad.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 21:52

Edward Mass: Sep 14, 2011; 𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen𝅘𝅥𝅮

Oranges
Wolverines
Southpaws

# ? Sep 23, 2015 22:16

Pungry: Feb 26, 2011; JUST PICK ONE. ANY ONE.

Pash posted:

Sheikhs take, rest retain.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 22:41

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 27, 2024 20:39

rabidsquid: Oct 11, 2004; LOVES THE KOG

Champs retain

# ? Sep 23, 2015 23:12

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > BBM Super-League XXIX: The World Ends With Yu Darvish

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