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Borland just finished his catte playthrough it's not his fault he thinks crocs are the same way.
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Sep 27, 2015 22:54
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Dr Cheeto posted:You sound like a skink, Borland. Always "meritocracy" this and "power to the people" that. Its "devour the people" Not "power to the people."
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Sep 27, 2015 23:39
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skinks aren't people 
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Sep 28, 2015 00:42
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Update The last page reassembled (312):  We're going right after those robots, because of reasons. The bad news is that those guys are gone. Regardless of whether they've been killed or not (and they probably have), Caiman society demands that someone lay claim to those empty bridge titles. Even if those poor bastards got back on board they'd be finished as officers. But anyway, revenge is a dish best served cold-blooded. Turning to 43:  This will cost 50 energy. There's no point spending less - if we chose to be economical then the Ganymed would get away and we might not get to robocide their entire species with a computer virus. We turn to 165, just in time for the Battle at Arich:   Since we were in the Forge for another day I deducted another 10 ENERGY and rolled on the radiation chart (adding one for the rad leak). We just got another leak, luckily. It's +2 to radiation rolls from now on. There's no need to bother with a crapulence check because almost all the crew are dead. I blocked off the Ganymed's stats because we need to pick a replacement crew before we duke it out. If you don't have any preferences then I'll shuffle the deck and pick randomly. We have to be a little careful from now on! The Caiman deck starts with 15 senior officers and 5 valets, and we've lost 6 crew and a valet already. This isn't the disaster it would be for other races because Caimen can go into any bridge position. Still, we can't keep up this rate of crew loss for a lot longer. We need a Weapons, Shields, Navigation and Engineering officer. Here's our manifest and map:   ------- DmitriX posted:
Well, you caught me out. Life's a hard thing and what most people do to get from one side of the day to the other doesn't usually bear scrutinising, so I was hoping you'd be decent enough not to poke too many holes in my story. But here we are, so I'll come clean. (spoilered for tale of woe): You might remember me buying a copy of the Bastard Elf from Two-Fisted Steve for an obscene amount of money. Steve runs the second-hand 2FF market with two iron fists as he's usually the only one with any copies of the more popular books. When he found out that I wanted his only copy of Void Racers he refused to sell it to me for any amount - instead he's the one that actually still has the book. Knowing what the book and these LPs mean to me he's the one scanning in the pages - I have to call him every day to tell him what page we've picked, he rips off the numbers we want to look at and then charges me to scan in the complete page. It's usually about £5 a page but he's talking about upping his rate again. I'd stop but he tells me he'll send me the book once the LP's complete and also if I have to stop this LP I'll have nothing left in my life. My old lady left me because she said I love these books more than I loved her and I didn't disagree. I've been impoverished by the divorce, medical costs from the damage the Bastard Elf did to my hand and buying the other Two-Fisted Fantasy novels that no one wanted to play (Cocksmith and Skytrap Temple) has left me destitute and I've sold everything but my books, my scanner, my computer and a blanket I spread on the floor. To pay Steve I often miss out on meals and sometimes rent. At least I had my pride but even that you had to rip away from me. And now you've heard my shameful tale, let's go on with the LP! Saint Isaias Boner fucked around with this message at 00:51 on Sep 28, 2015 |
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Sep 28, 2015 00:47
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Now this is a goon with his priorities in order
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Sep 28, 2015 01:13
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DmitriX I hope you're happy. Look at what Gilganixon goes through for us.
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Sep 28, 2015 01:27
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DmitriX posted:
Gilganixon posted:
You absolute bastard.
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Sep 28, 2015 01:46
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Dmitri you dick! Couldn't just enjoy things and leave well enough alone!
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Sep 28, 2015 02:40
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When we finish this fight we need to carve off as much meat as our holds can manage from that space giant. That's a fuckin' decadent delicacy right there. Edit: Oh no! Did we lose dippy bird with Chubbs?? 
hazardousmouse fucked around with this message at 02:49 on Sep 28, 2015 |
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Sep 28, 2015 02:43
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Oh poo poo they killed Galactus.
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Sep 28, 2015 02:48
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Weapons: Humuhumunukunukuapuaa Liliokulani VI Shields: Crocko the Lionhearted Navigation: Crocmelia Crockheart the famous Navigatrix Engineering: Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht
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Sep 28, 2015 02:56
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Okay guys, we need a plan. I say we do a heist to steal the book from Steve and get it into Gilganixon's hands. Otherwise, we run the risk of him starving to death. So, Ocean's Eleven anybody?
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Sep 28, 2015 03:11
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Can't we skip the weapons officer? We're going to use a Valet on this fight, and it'll probably be on weapons. Unless there's anyone Google isn't helping much, I found some old rpg fansite forum posts but I can't tell the official, approved Caimen from the homebrew garbage. Is there really some angry old marshbilly with a rusty blunderbuss (prized family heirloom) and an obsession with shooting strangers? I suggest: Weapons: Pappy "Trespassers-Will-Be" Munchon. Shields: Valet! Navigation: Some loser who'll get deposed Engineering: Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht sounds like a solid pick.
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Sep 28, 2015 03:35
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We're a race of rear end in a top hat reptilians, our base level of aggression towards strangers is high. However; the most virulently belligerent rednecks of us would've been too poor ... wait. Did the millionaire founder of Kuckoo Kingdom, famous for its birdcalls and reality show get on board? He would certainly qualify for weapons station!
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Sep 28, 2015 03:48
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Blurry Gray Thing posted:Can't we skip the weapons officer? We're going to use a Valet on this fight, and it'll probably be on weapons. You can't use the valet that way - they only get one roll per system. We need to have a crewman in every position if possible.
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Sep 28, 2015 08:59
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Gilganixon posted:You can't use the valet that way - they only get one roll per system. We need to have a crewman in every position if possible. Do they truly? The rulebook says it's one "task" per system, and i am pretty sure fighting a ship IS a "task".
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Sep 28, 2015 09:07
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poo poo, I need to pay more attention to GBS. Just got caught up. Leave our crew replacements to Fate. The crocs don't know what the hell they're doing and neither should we!
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Sep 28, 2015 09:31
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the_steve posted:Leave our crew replacements to Fate. Yup. Word economy and good sense right up in there. Also, is there any chance we should be using our gigantic disgusting butthole machine to throw off the DA scan? I mean, our ship has an anus. Let's expel justice.
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Sep 28, 2015 12:15
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J.D.Salinate posted:Yup. Word economy and good sense right up in there. That's the proper use of that thing. Not only will you get the first shot off, you save the energy you would have spent on the sensor round. DmitriX posted:Do they truly? The rulebook says it's one "task" per system, and i am pretty sure fighting a ship IS a "task". Yeah this issue caused a flame war on the 2FF forums as well. Using the valet at all in combat is pretty much gamebreaking and doesn't work with the valet's theme. The consensus was that by "task" the author meant those skill checks that come up sometimes - communications rolls, captain's leadership tests and things like that. Using his ability once in a space battle is considered a borderline exploit but using him for the whole battle is pretty much cheating.
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Sep 28, 2015 12:35
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e:nm
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Sep 28, 2015 12:36
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I also vote for chance to pick our crew. Besides, there is no way any Caiman, no matter how minor, can lose to a filthy circuit-back!
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Sep 28, 2015 13:20
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Gilganixon posted:That's the proper use of that thing. Not only will you get the first shot off, you save the energy you would have spent on the sensor round. Then Cloacaing Device! We can literally poo poo on our enemies. Also, chance.
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Sep 28, 2015 13:24
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Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax for weapons. Dude is bloodthirst personified chance for everyone else
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Sep 28, 2015 18:14
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Claven666 posted:Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax for weapons. Dude is bloodthirst personified I'll second the vote for Digby and chance but tack on a rider for Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht for engineer. So my vote goes like Weapons: Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax Shields: chance Navigation: chance Engineering: Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht
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Sep 28, 2015 18:24
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I know you're dedicated to giving us the full experience, so I have to ask if you were able to find the legendary Space Katana pack? This took some research to even learn about, but apparently, they made an add-on pack in a blatant attempt to rip off Return of the Jedi. For a number of reasons, it actually wasn't released until 1990, a good 7 years after it was in theaters. The only way to even get the card was to be at a con where the creator was selling special "collector's editions" of the vhs (see: bootlegged as all hell), and get the card as an insert. The artwork is about as close to a lightsaber ripoff as you can get, and it's possibly one of the most useless items to have ever been released. See, in order to use it "properly", you had to complete a mini-module that was 1. Ridiculously difficult, even by 2FF standards, and 2. Never actually printed or released due to legal issues. Without the module that would allow the proper training, any attempt to use the Space Katana in combat came with an increasingly likely chance to cut off your own hand, losing it and one of your Fists. It did allow you to cheese 1 or 2 encounters, but almost every other time, having it in your inventory was a death sentence, as you'd either kill yourself, or punch a hole in the ship and kill everyone while you swung it around like an idiot.
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Sep 28, 2015 18:35
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the_steve posted:I know you're dedicated to giving us the full experience, so I have to ask if you were able to find the legendary Space Katana pack? stop shilling, "not two-fisted steve" steve. if you've got something to sell you know i'm in the market. But yeah there area few modules like that floating around, they're usually made up a pamphlet, a few cards and a couple of pictures or a map or something. Not all of them were any good but they were cheap (back in the day at least). I have one about a slave uprising that I was thinking about running during this playthrough, I can ask Two-Fisted Steve about the Katana and see if I can put the katana item into circulation.
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Sep 28, 2015 19:00
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Gilganixon posted:stop shilling, "not two-fisted steve" steve. if you've got something to sell you know i'm in the market. Fine, but I'm not taking plasma again, not after what happened last time.
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Sep 28, 2015 20:24
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Applewhite posted:Navigation: Crocmelia Crockheart the famous Navigatrix and three randos
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Sep 28, 2015 21:09
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on second thought, I'll throw in another vote for Sir Raymond for engineer, considering his back story. should be hilarious so my vote is like Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax for weapons Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht for Engineer chance for the others
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Sep 28, 2015 21:50
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CHEAT Use the valet for the entire fight then! Remember people, we want to clear this run ASAP for reasons obvious to everyone reading this thread. We can leisurely explore failure states and other branches later on~.
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Sep 28, 2015 21:52
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DmitriX posted:CHEAT Cheaters never win.
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Sep 28, 2015 21:56
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Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax for weapons Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht for Engineer Navigation: Crocmelia Crockheart the famous Navigatrix
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Sep 28, 2015 21:57
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Pyroi posted:Cheaters never win. http://io9.com/remember-inside-ufo-54-40-the-unwinnable-choose-your-o-1552187271 I think that should qualify as a proper counmterpoint.
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Sep 28, 2015 21:59
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I vote we do whatever so long as it lets us investigate the giant rotting corpse because that poo poo is interesting right there
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Sep 28, 2015 22:02
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The crew is selected: Weapons: Spencer Digby von Ragetooth, Third Lictor of Thrax Shields: chance (Dented Garnnnnnn, 5, 1) Navigation: Crocmelia Crockart Engineering: Sir Raymond Luxury Yacht From now on I'm going to assume we're attuned enough to the crocs' way of doing things that we can live with randomly drawing replacements from the deck. We've got 6 crocs left in the pack and three valets, so we can churn through another crew if we have to. Warning: the leftovers are pretty worthless. I'll scan in the cards and run the battle, update in an hour or two. Speaking of the battle, I intend to use the Cloacaing Device and burn the maximum possible energy at every stage, using the coffee machine where appropriate. We have a big advantage in that it's not a fight to the death, we just need to get those shields down, so we can worry about recovering energy when something isn't trying to kill us. If you have any other ideas about how to run this battle let me know.
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Sep 28, 2015 22:14
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Gilganixon posted:If you have any other ideas about how to run this battle let me know. Do we have a torpedo that takes the form of a robot when it penetrates the hull and pretends to be one of them but then betrays them at a critical moment? Or a cannon that shoots two balls of plasma joined by an arc of electricity that whirl like bolas? What about a beam that rapidly accelerates time in the area where it strikes, causing the enemy to crumble to dust before our eyes? Maybe a spiked sphere that adheres to the hull before it detonates. All good options.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:26
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We could point at their feet and say "Your feet aren't bolted on properly" then shoot them when they look down to check.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:31
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Order that a manually-loaded "special charge" be placed into the Cloacaing Device for maximum efficacy. I recommend the lower reptiles sweep the deepening remnants from the bridge floor into the exhaust ports.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:38
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Perhaps fry them with some sort of logical paradox? Or bombard them with terrible anti-disco, except they probably have better sound systems than we do and could drown us out.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:39
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the_steve posted:Perhaps fry them with some sort of logical paradox? I like the anti-disco idea. Make the anti disco out of anti matter and let's watch them try and drown that out. We could do it if we reverse the charge and magnetic movement of the atoms of the enemy ship through the use of precisely modulated sound waves.
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Sep 29, 2015 01:42
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