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So we got our first quote from a caterer and it was gently caress off expensive but I have nothing to base this on. We wanted to do a light buffet brunch to be as simple as possible and the quote came back as 2x what everything else combined will be so far. e: are there any resources out there for providing us with an idea of what a reasonable cost would be?
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Oct 1, 2015 19:04
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putang posted:Hi wedding people. I'm mitztronic's other (better) half. I'm currently deep in planning our second wedding for our family members and I just came across a really handy spreadsheet template on google sheets. Thought someone in here would appreciate it! Did you link to this spreadsheet? I don't see one but then again I'm on my phone.
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Oct 1, 2015 19:28
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Re:catering quotes I think that will vary a lot depending on location. I just scanned the website for the caterer we are looking at, and the median price per head for something like brunch or light lunch is $9 a head, while dinner runs around $13 a head. That's including poo poo like delivery, setup, plates, etc. I'm also in western ND, so ymmv John Cenas Jorts fucked around with this message at 19:33 on Oct 1, 2015 |
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Oct 1, 2015 19:30
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Massasoit posted:So we got our first quote from a caterer and it was gently caress off expensive but I have nothing to base this on. This is entirely dependent on your area and your budget. Around me, $10/head will get you a basic nice sandwiches and snacks. Apparently in North Dakota that will get you a full dinner, which is laughably impossible in most eastern metro areas. So, yeah, we need more information to help you. Where are you, what is your budget, what were you quoted, how many guests?
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Oct 1, 2015 20:11
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Greater Boston Area. About 100 guests. They quoted 35/guest + another like 5.5k for other stuff. Total estimate was 9.7k We want a simple brunch buffet, but the sample menu they gave us was all fancy crap. 3.5k food 3.2k for staff 1.5k for dinner wear, glasses, linens 700 misc
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Oct 1, 2015 20:25
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Massasoit posted:Greater Boston Area. About 100 guests. They quoted 35/guest + another like 5.5k for other stuff. Total estimate was 9.7k Yeah this sounds right for Greater Boston Area since I got married in Boston proper and dinner buffet was like > 100/guest I wanna say? (Yeah just checked, was definitely more than $100/guest though that includes open bar.) Was worth it for the venue we got but sucked having to use their caterer. Food was really good though.
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Oct 1, 2015 20:52
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Well poo poo. Definitely not in the budget. This should be interesting.
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Oct 1, 2015 21:23
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Massasoit posted:Greater Boston Area. About 100 guests. They quoted 35/guest + another like 5.5k for other stuff. Total estimate was 9.7k Food seems reasonable, glasswear...a little bit reasonable, staff seems high. How many people were they using and what were they doing? Overall I feel like it's on the high side but not laughably unreasonable. What do you mean by "simple brunch buffet" versus "all fancy crap"? EDIT: And what is the budget for your whole wedding? Food is usually a huge chunk of the budget. Like, 50-70% sometimes. LogisticEarth fucked around with this message at 21:32 on Oct 1, 2015 |
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Oct 1, 2015 21:29
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I mean it will be closer to $15/head, but yeah. The best thing for your budget is to get married in a state that no one wants to visit, much less live in, so everything is cheap Edit: food is still like 50% of our budget though
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Oct 1, 2015 23:08
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We're going to do a small wedding in China, and we will probably make money because of how Chinese weddings work. Also, it's pretty cheap to host it even in a 5-star hotel venue.
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Oct 1, 2015 23:31
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^^We're doing a wedding in Thailand next year for my wife's family and we got a quote at $4-5k for the whole thing. Sure her parents are paying for it anyway, but I was pretty surprised to see that number the first time.Chessna posted:Did you guys do anything in particular to make it fun, or was it more the people? I love our scenic outdoor venue, but I'm a little worried that people are going to leave after dinner because there won't be much of a party atmosphere since it's outside. We are getting a big dance floor and a DJ, but there probably won't be special lighting. I was thinking of getting some LEDs to put around the dance floor, but it won't be the same as being in an inside venue specifically made for weddings/parties. Honestly, not really. Our main goals in planning the whole thing was to have a simple wedding, to make sure people had a good time, and for drama to be kept at an absolute minimum. Our wedding & reception were held in a botanical garden and we also lucked out with both the weather and the state of the gardens, as the cocktail hour between the ceremony and dinner allowed for people to walk about and enjoy the grounds. Also most of the guests were family or friends of my parents, so of course they're going to tell my mom to her face that it was the best wedding ever  It might be too late for you, but as far as making sure people had a reason to stay we actually had a split in our musical lineup. For the reception, dinner, and first dances we had a little jazz trio that was kind enough to play on the patio that was the main hub of the reception, then move inside for dinner. Once they left and people were drunk enough, we had actually rented a jukebox and loaded it up with songs and told people to go to town (an idea that my parents used at their own wedding). It gets people more involved with dancing since they can pick the songs themselves. If you're planning a wedding and haven't planned the music part it's worth looking into, it was a huge hit. C-Euro fucked around with this message at 23:42 on Oct 1, 2015 |
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Oct 1, 2015 23:39
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Massasoit posted:Greater Boston Area. About 100 guests. They quoted 35/guest + another like 5.5k for other stuff. Total estimate was 9.7k We paid $6700 for catering for a similarly sized wedding in the DC area wedding (dinner reception), so comparable prices. Does your venue offer linen service, plates, etc? Ours included basic white linens and table settings in the cost of the rental so we didn't have to get them through the caterer. There are also a lot of services where you can rent linens yourself that may end up cheaper. What's included in the misc category?
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Oct 1, 2015 23:41
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Mandalay posted:Did you link to this spreadsheet? I don't see one but then again I'm on my phone. I don't know how to share the actual link to the Google template, but I can share this sheet which can be copy and pasted https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1eRLLOjSH51IexMj6Z2AH9IqsDf-amPiMJO1AvvD1fWA/edit?usp=sharing Also regarding catering, I'm going to use this really nifty website https://www.catercow.com/ to find a caterer. I'm not sure how wide their coverage is but I know they have the entire California Bay Area covered and I think New York. Also it seems like the average for lunch is $8~/head and dinner $13/head. I was looking at holding our wedding at the SF Zoo and they only do in house catering for like $15 for lunch and $30 for dinner. The food didn't sound that good either  Or you can just order Chinese or Filipino food. They give you so much dang food for a decent price.
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Oct 2, 2015 00:42
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I've found myself in the rather odd situation of basically needing to get married before the end of the year for tax reasons. My girlfriend and I have been together for a pretty good amount of time and have already planned on getting married, but we haven't made any "official" engagement plans yet. We're already in a tight financial situation, so anything more than a dinner with immediate family and friends is off the table. I'm just wondering the best way to make a proposal that balances making a beautiful gesture with the cold financial fact that we'll go broke otherwise.
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Oct 2, 2015 19:20
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Flip Yr Wig posted:I've found myself in the rather odd situation of basically needing to get married before the end of the year for tax reasons. My girlfriend and I have been together for a pretty good amount of time and have already planned on getting married, but we haven't made any "official" engagement plans yet. We're already in a tight financial situation, so anything more than a dinner with immediate family and friends is off the table. I'm just wondering the best way to make a proposal that balances making a beautiful gesture with the cold financial fact that we'll go broke otherwise. 
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Oct 2, 2015 20:18
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Flip Yr Wig posted:I've found myself in the rather odd situation of basically needing to get married before the end of the year for tax reasons. My girlfriend and I have been together for a pretty good amount of time and have already planned on getting married, but we haven't made any "official" engagement plans yet. We're already in a tight financial situation, so anything more than a dinner with immediate family and friends is off the table. I'm just wondering the best way to make a proposal that balances making a beautiful gesture with the cold financial fact that we'll go broke otherwise. There are a lot of thoughtful cheap/free things you can do, like making dinner for her, jotting down some nice words/memories in a letter, going to a place of significance in your relationship. You can also quietly get married at the courthouse and then plan something later on for family/friends (so no need to worry about the wedding yet). IMO the best proposals are personal and private, and don't require flashmobs or elaborate gestures.
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Oct 2, 2015 20:22
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Hi_Bears posted:There are a lot of thoughtful cheap/free things you can do, like making dinner for her, jotting down some nice words/memories in a letter, going to a place of significance in your relationship. You can also quietly get married at the courthouse and then plan something later on for family/friends (so no need to worry about the wedding yet). IMO the best proposals are personal and private, and don't require flashmobs or elaborate gestures. Oh, yeah, I absolutely wouldn't want to do anything flashy like that, and I can think of nice ways to have that conversation. I'm more wondering about the best way to say "by the way, we basically need to get married in a couple of months." Honestly, it's not really a good question for a Something Awful thread, and I'm not actually wondering about it. I just wanted to vent my stress after running some numbers and realizing how urgent this was. Flip Yr Wig fucked around with this message at 20:37 on Oct 2, 2015 |
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Oct 2, 2015 20:35
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Have you considered just getting legally married and then doing the ceremony later?
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Oct 2, 2015 20:46
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Yeah, we've discussed that, and it's what we'll likely do. Of course, we also suspect that we'll lose the drive to actually commit to that pain in the rear end once we have the money and have been married for a couple of years. But such is life.
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Oct 2, 2015 20:54
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Flip Yr Wig posted:Oh, yeah, I absolutely wouldn't want to do anything flashy like that, and I can think of nice ways to have that conversation. I'm more wondering about the best way to say "by the way, we basically need to get married in a couple of months." Well if you have an open and honest relationship (and it sounds like you've been together for a while and talked about getting married already), it shouldn't come across as such a surprise. You can always have a separate discussion about your finances, come to the agreement that you need to get married, and then make a sweet proposal gesture later.
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Oct 2, 2015 21:13
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We just sort of agreed to it when I was home sick one day. I had a really bad first marriage and always said I would never go through that again, but it's different when it's the right person. It makes more sense for us to be married now than to keep pretending we don't want to. We literally just had like a casual conversation about it and agreed okay it's time.
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Oct 2, 2015 23:14
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So, after rain ruined the outside wedding we had planned, another $600 to have it at the reception (which wasn't expected) and running out of fucks to give around noon the day of...we finally got married after 2 years of engagement! The photographer got us this today as a teaser until all the pics get touched up in a month or two.
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Oct 6, 2015 14:10
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So I'm shopping for engagement rings for the lady. I have her sister doing some recon on some styles she might like in a couple of weeks but I'm big on research and making sure I get the best deal I can so I'm starting shopping around now. I just had a couple of questions for the SA collective which are pretty subjective but I'm interested in opinions regardless. 1. Solitaire vs Halo for the engagement ring. I see solitaire thrown in my face everywhere on the internet as the go-to for the engagement ring but is it really that much of a fashion fopah to roll with say a Halo design or other non-solitaire design if I can save money buying a wedding set? Let me be clear I'm not trying to pinch every penny but I'm generally thinking of ways to lower cost as I initially do the research and it seems that if i go for a matching wedding set I tend to save some money on the deal. 2. 18k vs 14k for the band - Does it really matter? 18k tends to be more expensive but is this one of those things you'll really notice? MAN QUESTION! I like the idea of a unique ring style like Tungsten or Titanium - how are they feel/wise wise? Are they obnoxiously heavy? Do you have any personal preferences on metal types? Last time I wore a ring on any finger was some bullshit high school class ring 15 years ago.
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Oct 6, 2015 14:21
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vyst posted:So I'm shopping for engagement rings for the lady. I have her sister doing some recon on some styles she might like in a couple of weeks but I'm big on research and making sure I get the best deal I can so I'm starting shopping around now. I just had a couple of questions for the SA collective which are pretty subjective but I'm interested in opinions regardless. Gold, it won't be noticeable unless she is a sorcerer. Just make sure you get the right color (white or yellow). For the diamonds...get what she likes. My fiancé wanted a black diamond surrounded by white diamonds. Ok, done. It is all about what she likes as she has to wear it. Don't cave in to what the interwebs tells you (hooray irony). My wedding band is titanium with channel lock CZ in it. I don't notice the ring, but you can also get a silicon ring if you do an active job and worry about needing to cut it off ever. I like the rings these guys make. This is the exact band I have.
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Oct 6, 2015 14:47
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vyst posted:So I'm shopping for engagement rings for the lady. I have her sister doing some recon on some styles she might like in a couple of weeks but I'm big on research and making sure I get the best deal I can so I'm starting shopping around now. I just had a couple of questions for the SA collective which are pretty subjective but I'm interested in opinions regardless. 1. This is all personal preference and something you should get the sister to help you figure out. IMO solitaires are more timeless whereas Halos are very "in" right now - they've been trendy for the past few years, and in a few decades people can probably look at her ring and know exactly when you got engaged. But on the other hand, halos can really make a ring look much bigger than shelling out money for a single rock. If you are set on diamond, and are into nerding out about diamond knowledge, I suggest you read this forum: http://www.pricescope.com/ This site also has a great primer: http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamonds-thebasics.html However, if you are not set on diamond, I would strongly suggest checking out moissanite. It's a lab-made alternative that is in some ways shinier, almost as hard, and doesn't come with the guilt of supporting blood diamonds and/or the De Beers family. Here's a primer on why many people think it's a great alternative (besides saving you a lot of $$): http://diamondssuck.com/ 2. 14k gold is actually stronger and more durable than 18k (less gold... more alloys) and nobody will notice. You should also check out palladium, which is more durable and requires less maintenance (and is sometimes cheaper). Also if your lady is allergic to nickel you won't be able to use gold, and will instead need to go for hypoallergenic metals like palladium and platinum.
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Oct 6, 2015 15:51
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Hi_Bears posted:1. This is all personal preference and something you should get the sister to help you figure out. IMO solitaires are more timeless whereas Halos are very "in" right now - they've been trendy for the past few years, and in a few decades people can probably look at her ring and know exactly when you got engaged. But on the other hand, halos can really make a ring look much bigger than shelling out money for a single rock. As a recent giver of a platinum-and-moissanite ring, I Agree With This Post. Depending on how your relationship is with the lady, you might just talk it out in general terms (thin band vs thicker band, gold vs platinum, stone shapes) between the two of you--that's what we did (and I'm glad we did because it helped me pick The Right Ring).
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Oct 6, 2015 15:56
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overdesigned posted:As a recent giver of a platinum-and-moissanite ring, I Agree With This Post. Depending on how your relationship is with the lady, you might just talk it out in general terms (thin band vs thicker band, gold vs platinum, stone shapes) between the two of you--that's what we did (and I'm glad we did because it helped me pick The Right Ring). Also, consider going to a local jeweler. Avoid Sterling Company locations (Kay Jewelers and the like). Local jewelers should be able to make you almost anything you want. Get into discussions with them on doing it.
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Oct 6, 2015 16:07
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Hi_Bears posted:Well if you have an open and honest relationship (and it sounds like you've been together for a while and talked about getting married already), it shouldn't come across as such a surprise. You can always have a separate discussion about your finances, come to the agreement that you need to get married, and then make a sweet proposal gesture later. And that's basically how it went. It was already a continuation of previous conversations we'd had on the topic. Last Friday was the first time I'd seen the tax bill on some work benefits we're receiving, and it was significantly more than we'd anticipated. We both agreed that getting married was the best option, but we were both a little disappointed that the decision had to be made on those terms (although we also congratulated ourselves on being so realistic). I said we should table the topic until I propose to her. So it won't exactly be a surprise, but it can still be a nice moment. I'm still not sure if I should buy her a ring or if we should do that together. (I'm pretty sure I should be asking her that question). My main regret now is that it's getting too cold to take her to some of our favorite outdoor locations.
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Oct 6, 2015 17:13
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vyst posted:I like the idea of a unique ring style like Tungsten or Titanium - how are they feel/wise wise? Are they obnoxiously heavy? Do you have any personal preferences on metal types? Last time I wore a ring on any finger was some bullshit high school class ring 15 years ago. Tungsten is heavy, titanium is light. You can try them on at any mall jewelry store nowadays. When I did that, I felt the weight of the tungsten ring was a bit noticeable when I moved my hand around, even though I liked the idea of it. Personally, I ended up getting this ring at e-weddingbands, it is titanium with a white gold inlay: http://www.e-weddingbands.com/store/product168953.html
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Oct 6, 2015 21:45
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Came back at the caterer with a lower budget and suggested a simpler menu and they basically told us to gently caress off
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Oct 7, 2015 19:09
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Massasoit posted:Came back at the caterer with a lower budget and suggested a simpler menu and they basically told us to gently caress off Sometimes I think we should postpone the wedding until the next recession.
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Oct 7, 2015 19:47
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Massasoit posted:Came back at the caterer with a lower budget and suggested a simpler menu and they basically told us to gently caress off Ironically...I told my venue to go gently caress themselves the day of my wedding when they tried to nickel and dime me. Get used to telling people to go gently caress themselves. If you don't have a deposit that you will lose (or its a small one that makes sense to lose), then it may be beneficial to look elsewhere. *crosses fingers and hopes this is the case*
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Oct 7, 2015 21:28
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Massasoit posted:Came back at the caterer with a lower budget and suggested a simpler menu and they basically told us to gently caress off This is why we are choosing a general caterer (cater cow, my wife posted it earlier). They will have no idea that it is for a wedding so they can't price gouge us.
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Oct 7, 2015 22:45
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Massasoit posted:Came back at the caterer with a lower budget and suggested a simpler menu and they basically told us to gently caress off From your posts and name, I'm guessing you are south of Boston? That's the area I'm in. Getting married in Hanson. I may have some suggestions.
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Oct 7, 2015 23:11
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A Proper Uppercut posted:From your posts and name, I'm guessing you are south of Boston? That's the area I'm in. Getting married in Hanson. I may have some suggestions. We're in Boston area - if you have any recommendations feel free to pm me! If you don't have PMs I'll post an email.
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Oct 8, 2015 00:12
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mitztronic posted:This is why we are choosing a general caterer (cater cow, my wife posted it earlier). They will have no idea that it is for a wedding so they can't price gouge us. This is an excellent way to piss off your vendors and potentially cause a problem or have them pull out. Maybe not catercow specifically (hard to tell exactly how that works for weddings without going through the whole order process). It's usually a bad idea to tell someone that "this is totally not a wedding" and then have them show up and, whoops, it's a wedding. There absolutely is some price gouging going on, but there are also legitimate reasons weddings are more expensive. They are usually way more complicated events, with higher service and quality standards, and often odd or unforseen situations.
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Oct 8, 2015 02:21
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Last minute cancels are killing us. Fiancée's brother doesn't bother getting a plus one and doesn't tell us. (WTF.) Two older folks have the flu. Someone has to travel for business. It's understandable, but trying to fill spots at the last minute sucks. For stress reasons, I'd really prefer to just leave the spots open and treat them like no-shows, but at the price we are paying per head, that's a hard sell.
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Oct 8, 2015 19:08
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LogisticEarth posted:This is an excellent way to piss off your vendors and potentially cause a problem or have them pull out. Maybe not catercow specifically (hard to tell exactly how that works for weddings without going through the whole order process). It's usually a bad idea to tell someone that "this is totally not a wedding" and then have them show up and, whoops, it's a wedding. There absolutely is some price gouging going on, but there are also legitimate reasons weddings are more expensive. They are usually way more complicated events, with higher service and quality standards, and often odd or unforseen situations. I'm essentially just planning on throwing a house party with food. I don't care to have wait staff or servers or assigned seating. People can put food on their own plates. Just like a typical family and friends gathering. All my guests just want to see me and the hubby being happy and in love and to eat and dance. If I were planning on throwing a standard banquet hall assigned seating and coordinated food serving then I wouldn't be a dick about it to my chosen caterer. The ceremony itself will be more intimate for the folks who weren't able to make it to burning man. I honestly just want to see my family, let them be able to be a part of the exchange of vows and unity stuff, and then dance the night away. My mom is really the only one expecting a typical wedding setup as she's constantly asking me about my flowers, decor, food/cake tastings, venue etc. etc. I just want to decorate my backyard and home all cute and just have fun with my fambam. Why does this have to be some extravagant money-sucking party. blah /rant
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Oct 9, 2015 22:13
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I got my ring today!
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Oct 9, 2015 23:21
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appleskates posted:I got my ring today! I love the band especially. And speaking of rings, we pick our bands up next week and besides my nail polish it's the last piece to the wedding puzzle. 3 weeks from today I will be married!
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Oct 9, 2015 23:30
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