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Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!




Huh, I guess quoting Jeb!'s fevered pleas to his donors could work as a campaign slogan.

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pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib
Jeb's new campaign slogan is Jeb can fix it, then we get:

"Jeb's not dead"


"Jeb's getting better"


*The Metal Gear Solid Game over screen with Colonel Campbell yelling "JEB? JEBBBBB!!!!"*

Tenzarin
Jul 24, 2007
.
Taco Defender

jeb is not winning

babypolis
Nov 4, 2009

i hope no one listened to joemomentum when he said it was a good time to buy jeb shares like a week ago

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

babypolis posted:

i hope no one listened to joemomentum when he said it was a good time to buy jeb shares like a week ago

Yeah, they're probably an even better buy today.

Three Olives
Apr 10, 2005

Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

Joementum posted:

Harry Reid is a brilliant troll.



I don't read it as much of a troll as much as pointing out that the guy is immature. He has little to no apparatus in the Senate, he is a junior Senator who has yet to prove himself at anything, he's still young, the guy should be buckling down and getting his hands dirty, it's really kind of outrageous for him to compare himself to John McCain in all honesty.

Epic High Five
Jun 5, 2004



Three Olives posted:

I don't read it as much of a troll as much as pointing out that the guy is immature. He has little to know aparatus in the senate, he is a Junior Senator who has yet to prove himself at anything, he's still young, the guy should be buckling down and getting his hands dirty, it's really kind of outrageous for him to compare himself to John McCain in all honesty.

No he should be burning all bridges to run too soon so that we never have to seriously worry about him again

DaveWoo
Aug 14, 2004

Fun Shoe

pathetic little tramp posted:

Jeb's new campaign slogan is Jeb can fix it, then we get:

"Jeb's not dead"

"Jeb's getting better"

Close:

quote:

Just one day after a lackluster showing at the Republican presidential debate in Boulder, Colo., Jeb Bush acknowledged to donors Thursday afternoon that he needs to improve his debate performance.

“I realize I need to get better,” the former Florida governor said, according to one person present on the call.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
Here's what Jeb!'s campaign was telling donors before the debate

Raskolnikov38
Mar 3, 2007

We were somewhere around Manila when the drugs began to take hold

did he leak this? i hope not what will the insulting voters slide

Tenzarin
Jul 24, 2007
.
Taco Defender

4 senators actually like him

Captain_Maclaine
Sep 30, 2001

Every moment that I'm alive, I pray for death!

"But won't."

Pinterest Mom
Jun 9, 2009

Three Olives posted:

I don't read it as much of a troll as much as pointing out that the guy is immature. He has little to no apparatus in the Senate, he is a junior Senator who has yet to prove himself at anything, he's still young, the guy should be buckling down and getting his hands dirty, it's really kind of outrageous for him to compare himself to John McCain in all honesty.

i think you might not be familiar with harry reid

coopting Jeb!'s criticism manages to hurt both Rubio and Jeb!, and Reid knows it

Epic High Five
Jun 5, 2004




Getting 18 pages into this and realizing I was barely 10% of the way through and consequently despairing has more or less convinced me that I would be terrible at politics

Raskolnikov38
Mar 3, 2007

We were somewhere around Manila when the drugs began to take hold

Epic High Five posted:

Getting 18 pages into this and realizing I was barely 10% of the way through and consequently despairing has more or less convinced me that I would be terrible at politics

Did you get to the Rubio attacks page at least?

e: oh wow it even has his campaign's districts in iowa

heard u like girls
Mar 25, 2013



:devil::devil::devil:
:frogdowns:

Mc Do Well
Aug 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
I like the certainty that the process doesn't really matter and the press is just playing up the horse race - like the whole primary is fixed and Joementum is right about that bet.

Epic High Five
Jun 5, 2004



This is bad news because it will hurt Jeb, and we need him just strong enough to take Rubio down with him to usher in the Yooge Age

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
Note that Right to Rise has spent $33m in ads that haven't aired yet. Rubio's campaign has spent $17m on advance ads, with Jeb! spending $8m.

Raskolnikov38
Mar 3, 2007

We were somewhere around Manila when the drugs began to take hold

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ
:lol: The Texas Land Commissioner is listed as a "notable endorsement" on page 77.

pathetic little tramp
Dec 12, 2005

by Hillary Clinton's assassins
Fallen Rib
Obama was down 80-20 in the polls until the Texas Land Commissioner endorsed him in a huge October surprise in 2012.

Intel&Sebastian
Oct 20, 2002

colonel...
i'm trying to sneak around
but i'm dummy thicc
and the clap of my ass cheeks
keeps alerting the guards!

Besides the obvious here we have yet another GOP chart implying things the numbers don't actually show.

heard u like girls
Mar 25, 2013

This doc cant be real right ?

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Humans Among Us posted:

This doc cant be real right ?

Yes. Someone leaked it to US News & World Report.

memy
Oct 15, 2011

by exmarx
http://www.theonion.com/graphic/winners-and-losers-last-nights-debate-51758

Highlight:

quote:

Losers
CNBC: Independent of the night’s proceedings, CNBC remains a terrible network

fade5
May 31, 2012

by exmarx

Humans Among Us posted:

This doc cant be real right ?
It is very, very real.

There's a reason Jeb! is doing as bad as he is, this is just one more brick in the wall fuckup in a string of fuckups.

Rocks
Dec 30, 2011

Joementum posted:

:lol: The Texas Land Commissioner is listed as a "notable endorsement" on page 77.

Isn't that Jeb's son, Neil?

HMS Beagle
Feb 13, 2009



pathetic little tramp posted:

Obama was down 80-20 in the polls until the Texas Land Commissioner endorsed him in a huge October surprise in 2012.

If you don't know who the Texas Land Commissioner is, you should look it up! It's truly shocking Jeb! got that endorsement.

Joementum
May 23, 2004

jesus christ

Rocks posted:

Isn't that Jeb's son, Neil?

George P., but yes.

Mc Do Well
Aug 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Heckuva job, Gampy - 50th President of the USA George P. Bush

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdVNp7elw4w

Jeb'll Fix It :reddit:

Winkie01
Nov 28, 2004
Trip Gabriel
‏@tripgabriel
This is frustration: for Jeb in Iowa, 70,000 calls made, 76 county chairs & 129 precinct leaders recruited. But only 1,281 Id'd supporters.


:lol:

Tender Bender
Sep 17, 2004

Rocks posted:

Jeb! doubling down on the Rubio attack: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvv6vZvzq3E

It's just sad now Jeb. Just stop.

This is really worth a watch or at least a listen if you just skipped over it. Jeb wants to be president and he's floundering and getting shut down by a random Fox News anchor. There's also clanging bells and sirens that start up halfway through which give it a delightfully Lynchian quality.

babypolis
Nov 4, 2009

Joementum posted:

Yeah, they're probably an even better buy today.

so you think hes gonna be able to ride this out? the media narrative so far is incredibly negative and the guy doesnt seem to perform well under pressure

babypolis
Nov 4, 2009

honestly rubio seems like a shoe in at this point. should have gone with my gut and bought some of his shares months ago

fade5
May 31, 2012

by exmarx
A list of some of these amazing slides, each more amazinger that the others:






William Bear
Oct 26, 2012

"That's what they all say!"
Jeb is right that fundamentals matter.

Something fundamental: having supporters.

Tender Bender
Sep 17, 2004

Do Not Resuscitate posted:

Nah, I come at it from a different angle. It was the worst moderation that I've seen at a presidential debate, full stop.

We could have had some righteous inter-party squabbling if the moderators had just mellowed out, asked normal questions, and let these clowns do their thing. Instead, the moderators wanted to get in on the action and drop some sick burns in response to some of the answers they got to their questions like it was a hard-hitting 60 Minutes piece or something. Let the other candidates chime in to dispute the questionable claims someone made, you retards! In fact, the candidates tried to do that but they were shouted down -- by the moderators!

CNBC was scrub league trying to do "investigative journalism" during a debate lol. Ask your question then sit back and let everyone have at it. Keep everyone honest about the clock and bam -- you'll have fireworks naturally. That's all that was needed.

I dunno, isn't it irresponsible to have ten idiots on stage spewing lies to millions without trying to do basic factchecking? Like the poo poo that was said about Social Security and the economy last night was just completely made up and most viewers probably don't realize that because all these guys were fighting with each other but held a few things to be understood truths.

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Mitt Romney
Nov 9, 2005
dumb and bad
Didn't some of the anti-Marco slides make an appearance about a week ago?

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