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His Divine Shadow posted:Are your homes cold or badly insulated? What does it matter what time of year it is inside? It stays the same temperature. Or doesn't it for you? If homes stayed the same temperature inside regardless of the outside temp then nobody would have air conditioners or heaters now would they?
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Nov 29, 2015 10:16
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If your house is badly insulated then even with heating it'll get colder in winter because the heat leaks out and unless you're made of money you can't just crank up the heat to a zillion to compensate. I am just having a hard time imagining such houses being built in cold climates, but I've heard of it before, people having several degrees cooler indoors and resorting to electrical blankets and whatnot, or I guess, mittens for children.
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Nov 29, 2015 11:14
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kells posted:If homes stayed the same temperature inside regardless of the outside temp then nobody would have air conditioners or heaters now would they? Unless you live in a shanty town or an igloo it's pretty weird if all houses are so cold in the winter that kids routinely wear mittens inside.
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Nov 29, 2015 11:41
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They're talking about mittens for babies, the kind they used to put on newborns to stop them scratching themselves. I was recently surprised when I had my second baby 14 years after my first, and the midwives said they don't use or recommend them anymore because having their hands free is important to their development. Our midwives even taught us a new swaddle where the hands are up and can be moved around (so baby can put their hands on their mouth even with arms swaddled. Anyway, just small babies, no one's saying your preschooler is going to be developmentally stunted. I'm pretty sure lots of babies turned out ok too. Edit: they don't use hats anymore either. Big Bug Hug fucked around with this message at 13:15 on Nov 29, 2015 |
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Nov 29, 2015 13:11
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First I didn't want to insult anyone. Just reporting back what nurses and peds have told us. Like I said I did not verify if there was any literature on the subject. After 2 peds and 3 nurses I just decided to accept it. They might be wrong and babies obviously won't explode if they are in mittens 24/7 there are many places on earth where baby spend probably 100% of their times in mitts.His Divine Shadow posted:Are your homes cold or badly insulated? What does it matter what time of year it is inside? It stays the same temperature. Or doesn't it for you? Most people keep their house much colder in the winter because it's expensive to keep home very warm (when it's under -20c for months no matter how well insulated the cost pile up). Also people wear more clothes/warmer ones in the winter so thet don't want to change into light clothes when they come home. also many older houses and apartments are indeed badly insulated -- Question about bottle feeding a breastfed baby. Our baby is 2 months old and we want to give him a bottle every now and then (pumped milk). Both time we've tried he downed a 4 and the second time 5 oz bottle in like 15 minutes and then demanded more. He did spit up some at the end though, so may be he had a bit too much? But when I removed him after 3,5 oz or so (removed him every oz or so to see how he was) he would cry and try to eat everything he saw/putting his hand in his mouth, etc. That seems like an insane amount to me since he's so young. Is this even a remotely normal/acceptable amount or are we doing something wrong here? Could it be that he just wants to get a real breast to comfort himself? Could it be that he does not feel that he's full since he can drink so much faster? He usually breastfeed for close to 1 hour vs a little over 15 minutes with a bottle. KingColliwog fucked around with this message at 13:55 on Nov 29, 2015 |
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Nov 29, 2015 13:33
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KingColliwog posted:First I didn't want to insult anyone. Just reporting back what nurses and peds have told us. Like I said I did not verify if there was any literature on the subject. After 2 peds and 3 nurses I just decided to accept it. They might be wrong and babies obviously won't explode if they are in mittens 24/7 there are many places on earth where baby spend probably 100% of their times in mitts. You weren't insulting anyone. You were stating what you were told is best practice. Can we all take a breath. Best practice is the ideal. NO ONE manages it all of the time and kids generally do turn out just fine. It is still important that we share. learn, and try to do best practices as much as we can without beating ourselves up when we aren't perfect. The reason we have best practices is because some kids did not turn out just fine, so people stating their kids are just fine are missing the broader point. Thank you for sharing this info. and I hope everyone can also share best practices they've learned and we can all just take in the info. and not get defensive. Remember we didn't always use car seats but they are obviously good things. That doesn't mean parents that didn't use them were bad or that kids didn't survive. We all do our best with the info. at hand and the more info. we share the better we all do! Everyone on this thread appears to be wonderful, caring, and thoughtful parents so just remember that you are doing great and new info. is good. On the bottle front, I suspect 2 things. One is that the nipple could be allowing too much milk to flow so he is drinking it faster than he can process it to self-regulate. Maybe try another bottle with a slower flowing nipple? It is also good to stop after every oz for a few minutes (if they will let you!) to give them time to figure out if they need more. But, just like a breastfed baby, you want to let the baby lead the way so I wouldn't worry too much if he wants more. Since it is an occasional thing, whether he drinks a ton or a little is not going to make a big difference for his development or health. The other issue could be comfort. Maybe try having the bottle giver hold him a little bit before giving the bottle. I'm thinking skin-to-skin contact might be helpful. Just an FYI, we did occasional bottles and our little guy was really hit and miss with taking them. He was really good at first, but the older he got the more stubborn he got and he would only drink an ounce if he was starving and then he'd wait until the breast was available (never more than an hour or two). When he was big enough to sit up and started with solids we gave him a little cup and started teaching him to drink from the cup (~6 months). He did well and really liked that. It was just time consuming because we'd only give him a little bit at a time. We used some shot glass sized cups from ikea, cheaper than the Montessori ones.
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Nov 29, 2015 14:42
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KingColliwog posted:
That is a huge bottle for a breastfed baby, so your instincts are correct. Here's a great link on how to bottle feed a breastfed baby in such a way to protect the breastfeeding relationship: http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/feeding-tools/bottle-feeding/. The short version is that you want to really take your time and have the baby work for it like at the breast. Otherwise, it's really easy for them to start to prefer the easy flow at the bottle over the less easy one at the breast. If you're not using one yet, I'd actually recommend a pacifier too. Breastfed babies typically have a high need to suck and they can't stop milk from coming out of a bottle like they can stop it from a breast.
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Nov 29, 2015 16:35
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Sockmuppet posted:Also, wool wool woolly wool. It's the best! I sort of envy my kids the wide selection of lovely and wonderful wool clothes. I have a fair amount of wool myself but none of it is kickin' rad like their stuff.
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Nov 29, 2015 18:50
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My 2-month-old still mostly refuses to sleep while not being held/not near us. We decided yesterday to try to be more consistent during the day in putting her down to sleep, but it's just not working well. We tried three times twice yesterday and once so far today, but she doesn't last more than 10 minutes; usually quite a bit less. We only put her down after she seems to be well asleep (no REM), and we've tried on her back or on her side, and we make sure to warm up the surface before we put her there. What else can we try (in addition to more time, I'd assume)? Also, at what point do you give up and let the drat kid sleep on her face?
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Nov 29, 2015 18:56
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I wouldn't feel comfortable putting a kid down on their belly until after 12 months. Once they can roll there if they get there on their own I don't change their position (still put them on their backs when I put them in) but I wouldn't put them down on their belly that young. My son slept for naps on us for months. He sleeps fine for naps on his own now without us doing anything other than letting time go by.
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Nov 29, 2015 18:58
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hooah posted:My 2-month-old still mostly refuses to sleep while not being held/not near us. Babywearing evangelism time: I don't know how many cumulative hours I've logged with a little boy (I have three of 'em) sleeping on me in a moby wrap or a mei tai, but it's a hell of a lot of hours. Both for naps and for getting 'em ready to be gently moved over into their beds. One big advantage is that you can do other stuff at the same time (such as loading the dishwasher, or shitposting on SA).
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Nov 29, 2015 19:05
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We do wear her a fair amount, but often she still will fuss if we sit down.
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Nov 29, 2015 19:20
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I thought the infant mittens thing was because babies bring their hands to their mouths and choking or suffocating on them.
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Nov 29, 2015 20:21
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hooah posted:My 2-month-old still mostly refuses to sleep while not being held/not near us. We decided yesterday to try to be more consistent during the day in putting her down to sleep, but it's just not working well. We tried three times twice yesterday and once so far today, but she doesn't last more than 10 minutes; usually quite a bit less. We only put her down after she seems to be well asleep (no REM), and we've tried on her back or on her side, and we make sure to warm up the surface before we put her there. What else can we try (in addition to more time, I'd assume)? Also, at what point do you give up and let the drat kid sleep on her face? Our kid was like that too, she would always wake up if we put her down. It sucks so hard since naptime is supposed to be when you get some time off to do your own thing! We tried a bunch of stuff but could never quite face "cry it out". In the end we asked our pediatric nurse about it and she said listening to what your baby is telling you is never wrong, and there's no science supporting the "fact" that you need to teach them to sleep by a certain age or you've missed your window of opportunity. Basically we weren't ruining anything by letting her sleep while we held her, if we wanted to keep doing that. So that's what we did, occasionally (and super inconsistently) we'd offer the crib or stroller or whatever and see how it went. In the end, at about six months she learned to take naps in our bed with one of us next to her (we'd still need to stay with her for the duration of the nap, but there was no need to hold her). Last week (at 8 months) she suddenly started taking long, beautiful naps in her own crib. I'm telling you this because to us it felt so liberating to us that we didn't HAVE to "sleep train" if we didn't want to. Obviously if you feel like you want to keep trying then you should. But at two months old she's still very young, so don't feel too bad if it's not working yet. A lot of my friends with kids said it got better at about three months - though in the end it took a bit longer for us, hah.
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Nov 29, 2015 22:47
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That's good to hear. We're certainly not considering any form if "cry it out" until she's at least four months. Our concern now is more that we have things we need to do, like work or school work, and it's harder to get stuff done with her in tow.
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Nov 29, 2015 22:52
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I hear ya. For us, when she got a bit older we ended up doing our productive stuff while she was awake and could entertain herself for a bit in a bouncy seat or something like that. I'm sure that's terrible parenting and I should have spent that precious bonding time singing educational songs and doing baby yoga but whatcha gonna do. Also, my MIL lent us her rocking chair so we could sit down while the baby was in the sling. It didn't work consistently enough that I would advocate buying one, but if you get the opportunity to borrow one it's worth a shot.
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Nov 29, 2015 23:08
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We've adopted "cry it out" as an unavoidable part of life for our 10m old. Pretty much every nap time, as soon as he realizes he's going down for a nap (meaning that if we change him around naptime he starts crying immediately) He is not soothed by anything, not anymore, and left to his own devices he will stay up so long he's crying over the fact that he might fall asleep while playing. Is this normal? What can we do? He usually cries for between 10-30 minutes before falling asleep. Any stimulation at all (holding, rocking, singing, whatever) only prolongs things. Once in a while we can "trick" him into watching a video in his mom's lap and he'll fall asleep like that, but only if it's way past his bedtime - otherwise any attempt to hold him will have him struggling to escape until he ends up in tears.
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Nov 30, 2015 02:15
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Does he need to drop a nap?
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Nov 30, 2015 03:27
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Re mittenchat: I was just curious about where an infant/baby would be wearing mittens so much that it might affect their development, since I grew up north of the Arctic circle, and babies don't routinely wear mittens inside here. And concerning babysleep - I think we've just been handed a crappy sleeper by the baby gods - she's now going on 2.5 years old, and the last six months she's slept through the night less than a handful of times, and we've tried everything. It's been getting slightly better now that we can talk properly about things, I'm hoping it'll continue that way.
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Nov 30, 2015 09:25
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My just-turned-5-year-old little guy has suddenly developed a mighty high sense of himself. We are finding he is resisting the family rules much more than he used to, he's having a lot more stomping tantrums, and all I can figure it he either picked it up from elementary school or it's just his age. I am trying to make sure I explain everything to him clearly, give him a chance to respond with his own point of view, and gently remind him that he is responsible for his own behavior and if he throws a toy or refuses to listen to us or whatever then he has to have a consequence. It's a little odd for us to have an actual verbal argument with him, as his language skills and growing by leaps and bounds and he's able to make rather clear arguments for himself, but...am I getting a taste of the next 10+ years? Seriously, this is getting annoying!
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Nov 30, 2015 09:27
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My 5 year old is going through that stompy phase. For the angry bit, I've been using "it's okay to be mad, but it's not okay to take it out on other people", and then offering some alone time to go be mad on her own. For the stomping thing, I make her turn around, go back to where she started, and walk without stomping. Sometimes we get to do this several times! It feels nitpicky, but after sticking to it pretty good, it's basically gone and I have the goodhearted kid I sent to Kindergarten back.
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Nov 30, 2015 18:00
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My 2.5 year old is really pushing limits lately too. I feel like most of it is my fault as I don't know what to do so I'm not consistent with one type of approach. I'm working on it though. He's picked up on my tone of voice and body language and mirrors it riiiiiight back at me when he's angry/frustrated, so I definitely need to rein that in myself. (Like, if I get frustrated I'll kinda go "GRRRRR" under my breath and huff a sigh. He now does this.) I read a book, recommended by my therapist (who is a family therapist too, I don't bring him cuz he's too young but am laying the groundwork) about the 1-2-3 Magic method http://www.123magic.com/ and at the time thought it stupid and facile, but I have to say, I'm using it (not very well, I do "argue" with him) and it's sort of working. I HATE counting and feeling like a behaviourist, but the past few days if he's not listening to me, I can just say "One..." and hold up a finger, and he knows I mean business. I dunno. I'm trying. It's hard. He's with me all the time, so I think a lot of it is he's just sick of me, because he's good for other people!
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Nov 30, 2015 18:31
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KingColliwog posted:Question about bottle feeding a breastfed baby. Our baby is 2 months old and we want to give him a bottle every now and then (pumped milk). Both time we've tried he downed a 4 and the second time 5 oz bottle in like 15 minutes and then demanded more. He did spit up some at the end though, so may be he had a bit too much? But when I removed him after 3,5 oz or so (removed him every oz or so to see how he was) he would cry and try to eat everything he saw/putting his hand in his mouth, etc. That seems like an insane amount to me since he's so young. We had to finger feed and then bottle feed our daughter along with breastfeeding from birth until she threw off the nipple shield at 5 months old. During that time I was seeing our local group of IBCLCs (lactation consultants) once a week so I can just repeat what they said: breastmilk in bottles should be given in 2-4 oz portions (at 2 months we were doing 2 oz in the finger feeder). Do paced bottle feeding and aim for about 1 oz per hour mother and baby are separated. It's normal for some breastfed babies to cry after bottles of any size (mine does). It's so easy for them to overeat with a bottle that they don't realize they've gotten enough. My daughter prefers to be held upright in general, so after a bottle whoever is giving it just gets up with her and walks around a little. After a minute she's happy again and ready to play.
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Nov 30, 2015 19:59
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sudont posted:I read a book, recommended by my therapist (who is a family therapist too, I don't bring him cuz he's too young but am laying the groundwork) about the 1-2-3 Magic method http://www.123magic.com/ and at the time thought it stupid and facile, but I have to say, I'm using it (not very well, I do "argue" with him) and it's sort of working. I HATE counting and feeling like a behaviourist, but the past few days if he's not listening to me, I can just say "One..." and hold up a finger, and he knows I mean business. I dunno. I'm trying. It's hard. He's with me all the time, so I think a lot of it is he's just sick of me, because he's good for other people! I do a 1-2-3 counting thing. Some people say you should only have to say something once, but I truly think kids get so wrapped up in their own tantrums and internal stuff that they simply can't hear half the things you say to them. When I say 1, they usually just do whatever I have told them to do, but if I get to 2 or 3 it's usually when they realize what is going on and do it. I really don't get past 3 to the time-out or whatever, only lately with my 5-year old who is really into testing us these days. And I don't do it very often, maybe once a day per kid. It's hard to remember, I'm with them 24/7 (the oldest goes to elementary school so we get a break from each other) but being consistent is KEY. And don't worry about pissing them off, they are not your friends. I know lots of parents who treat their kids like friends, give them whatever their kids whine for to keep them happy and stuff, and those kids turn out...not very friendly. I really hope that by being firm and consistent with them now (with lots of hugs and kisses and goofiness, of course) that we can have a great relationship when they are older and be more friends then! I don't have that kind of relationship with my own mom, I want to be the parent who their kids actually want to hang out with when they are older. I think creating solid boundaries now, reinforcing rules of behavior, and providing a solid foundation for life is a good start.
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Nov 30, 2015 19:59
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VorpalBunny posted:And don't worry about pissing them off, they are not your friends. This should be tattooed onto the forearm of every new parent.
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Dec 1, 2015 09:51
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VorpalBunny posted:And don't worry about pissing them off, they are not your friends. Parenting Megathread: They are not your friends.
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Dec 1, 2015 11:32
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I'm not worried about pissing him off, I'm pretty sure that's half my job  I was remarking more on how be behaves better for others.
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Dec 1, 2015 14:58
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Behaving better for others I think is a direct side effect of the condition of "being 2.5"
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Dec 1, 2015 16:22
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What age do kids really learn to share? Or at least start learning? Nora definitely doesn't like to share. She's 15 months so I of course don't think this is an easy concept for her to grasp yet, but I just want to make sure I know when to start reinforcing it.
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Dec 1, 2015 16:43
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In my opinion, sharing well is kind of like eating well - you get dealt a kid who is either by nature pretty good at it or pretty bad at it, and you can make it better or worse from there. I'd say at 15 months you can start reinforcing it, but I think it's a long road until they're good at it.
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Dec 1, 2015 17:54
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GlyphGryph posted:He is not soothed by anything, not anymore, and left to his own devices he will stay up so long he's crying over the fact that he might fall asleep while playing. Just curious, what do you mean by this? Our 11 month old sleeps during naptimes via me bouncing on an exercise ball while wearing her in a carrier. I'd suggest giving it a try if you haven't already with your son. Some people can do it cradling their kid without a carrier, and can then just put their child down afterwards.
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Dec 1, 2015 20:43
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photomikey posted:In my opinion, sharing well is kind of like eating well - you get dealt a kid who is either by nature pretty good at it or pretty bad at it, and you can make it better or worse from there. I'd say at 15 months you can start reinforcing it, but I think it's a long road until they're good at it. I think there are ways to make your kid much worse at sharing, and I see parents doing these things all the time.
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Dec 1, 2015 22:40
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notwithoutmyanus posted:Just curious, what do you mean by this? The only way (other than bottle to sleep) we can get our daughter to sleep easily (usually) is walking outside in the carrier. Has to be outside walking around the block, inside or the yard doesn't cut it. Luckily she transfers to the bed well once home.
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Dec 2, 2015 03:54
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Avalinka posted:The only way (other than bottle to sleep) we can get our daughter to sleep easily (usually) is walking outside in the carrier. Has to be outside walking around the block, inside or the yard doesn't cut it. Luckily she transfers to the bed well once home. Heh, yeah. I think my child has a distraction preference - notably, none when she wants to sleep some of the time - and on rare occasion everything. I've had a few times where walking did the trick in public and a few times where seeing her reflection in the TV/windows or seeing our hanging pot rack (a holy poo poo item from her perspective complete with surprise noise) basically kept her awake. I'd be guessing this falls under "Every kid is different" Edit: has anyone seen this before? I hadn't. I guess it's like swaddling via a handhold? http://boingboing.net/2015/12/01/how-to-calm-a-crying-baby.html notwithoutmyanus fucked around with this message at 05:25 on Dec 2, 2015 |
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Dec 2, 2015 04:17
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Sockmuppet posted:Unless you live in a shanty town or an igloo it's pretty weird if all houses are so cold in the winter that kids routinely wear mittens inside. I wear gloves inside in winter sometimes and it never goes below like 8c. Maybe houses are poo poo in Australia.
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Dec 2, 2015 08:31
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Papercut posted:I think there are ways to make your kid much worse at sharing, and I see parents doing these things all the time. And vice versa. Same as good manners / politeness. Live the behaviour you want your kids to absorb. kells posted:I wear gloves inside in winter sometimes and it never goes below like 8c. Maybe houses are poo poo in Australia. That and to make sure you don't leave prints
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Dec 2, 2015 11:47
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Well we got the kids casts taken off today and the surgeries look like they went well. Everything is still very swollen though and it will take months for it to recede fully and for proper function to return, but yeah, he's got a thumb now
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Dec 2, 2015 19:21
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BonoMan posted:She's 15 months so I of course don't think this is an easy concept for her to grasp yet, but I just want to make sure I know when to start reinforcing it. I think it's never too early to start reinforcing things (in a positive, age-appropriate manner, of course). Make a point of sharing stuff with her, and when she shares with you, praise her. Even if she doesn't really get it yet, you're modelling good behaviour and interacting with her, which is all good stuff We're really big on praising positives in our house, which has resulted in my two year old praising us when we do random stuff that she gets praise for doing, which is cute when it concerns us cleaning up something we've spilt, and downright hilarious when she goes "Wow, you're a big girl, mommy, you're peeing on the toilet! Daddy, mommy is peeing on the toilet! I'm super proud of mommy!" 
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Dec 2, 2015 22:25
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Which age can you start expecting them to at least pretend to be putting stuff away when they're done with it? Like I've got no idea when that's even possible, and mine has only just discovered that putting stuff into other stuff is even possible so I know it's not coming soon, just wondering.
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Dec 3, 2015 17:32
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We started singing a made up 'Put-away' song for our 1.5 year old and he figured it out pretty quick because we made it a game to put all the Legos in the boxes as quick as we could. Our guys also learned a different 'Clean up' song from their respective day area, but they seem to listen to our home-made on better. Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere Clean up, clean up, everybody do their share Is the school one. Our made up one is bad and the words change depending on what we need them to do
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Dec 3, 2015 19:32
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