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Smythe posted:*watching DBAN run on dead gramms compy* You're free now. Rest in peace, old friend. Smythe posted:*on my deathbed* son... pls dban my gaming rig. theres some poo poo on there u dont want to see. Smythe posted:son: dban? whats that???
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# ? Dec 2, 2015 22:52 |
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# ? May 11, 2024 09:45 |
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Desuwa posted:How do you prove that I exist? Likewise I cannot prove that you exist. I could be a brain in a jar being fed sensory information. Eponine posted:It's like Plato's cave except I'm on fire and screaming.
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# ? Dec 2, 2015 23:27 |
El Spider posted:Make me the GBS moderator Spanish Manlove posted:Please don't do it.
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# ? Dec 2, 2015 23:41 |
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sharktamer posted:Posting actual jokes in GBS already seems high brow. Modern GBS is a Breitbart FYAD-light, there's no room for jokes.
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 00:57 |
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Let's rename it Fozzie's Lair, in honor of our favorite joke-telling Muppet.
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 12:22 |
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Only if it's made a rule that all posts end in "wakka wakka".
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 16:21 |
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"Today my History class took a feild trip to the Museum of Tolerance. Its a museum showing kids not to be prejudice and all that good stuff. Anyways, one exhibit is two doors next to each other. One door has a sign hanging over it saying "Those with prejudice walk through this door" The other door's sign said "Those without prejudice walk through this door". Obviously the door for people without prejudice isn't openable because as the tour guide says "Everyone has prejudice". So, I start tugging on the door and say "What the hell is wrong with this drat door, did some drat Jew make this?" and the tour guide kicked me out and i had to sit in the bus for 15 minutes"
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 17:02 |
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Non-EuclideanCat posted:Only if it's made a rule that all posts end in "wakka wakka". And maybe throw this in too:
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 18:30 |
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CowboyKid posted:"Today my History class took a feild trip to the Museum of Tolerance. Its a museum showing kids not to be prejudice and all that good stuff. Anyways, one exhibit is two doors next to each other. One door has a sign hanging over it saying "Those with prejudice walk through this door" The other door's sign said "Those without prejudice walk through this door". Obviously the door for people without prejudice isn't openable because as the tour guide says "Everyone has prejudice". So, I start tugging on the door and say "What the hell is wrong with this drat door, did some drat Jew make this?" and the tour guide kicked me out and i had to sit in the bus for 15 minutes" Bash quote http://bash.org/?349135
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# ? Dec 3, 2015 23:09 |
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On old video games:Big Mad Drongo posted:I just want you to say you're a monster and thanks to you I went through a bunch of rigmarole to get this thing working last night and my wife made fun of me for going through the trouble for a game that, in her words, "looks so bad" and now I'm about to blow a bunch of free time playing a 20-year-old game when it could be wasted on Fallout 4 or something. GreenNight posted:Tell your wife that just because it looks bad due to it's age, doesn't mean you don't love it the same as when you first met it.
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 01:59 |
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Does anyone have that quote where the guy related his pathetic and made up story about how he made a joke in a theater and and the whole place turned into an 'MST3K-style riff fest'? I may have been reading that thread as it happened.
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 07:47 |
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cheerfullydrab posted:Does anyone have that quote where the guy related his pathetic and made up story about how he made a joke in a theater and and the whole place turned into an 'MST3K-style riff fest'? Mister Glockwork posted:I saw Ghostrider with a bunch of my friends on opening night just to heckle it. We even held a contest to see who could throw out the best heckle. Falstaffs Honor posted:I don't think this story is true, because I doubt most of the audience was familiar with internet videos about Wicker Man. Adrianics posted:Just like that time I went to see Atonement and when that faggy guy with the stupid moustache gave the chocolate to that kid I yelled 'YOU GONNA GET RAPED' and I swear that the audience was laughing so hard they had to stop the film for a few minutes
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 08:29 |
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Mister Glockwork posted:I saw Ghostrider with a bunch of my friends on opening night just to heckle it. We even held a contest to see who could throw out the best heckle. Apparently my friend had the same exact idea as me because as soon as Ghostrider first appeared we yelled out "HOW'D IT GET BURNED?" in our best Wicker Man impressions. The audience loving lost it and the rest of the movie turned into a MSTK riff fest. Falstaffs Honor posted:I don't think this story is true, because I doubt most of the audience was familiar with internet videos about Wicker Man. Factor Mystic posted:BUT IT WAS A MST3K RIFF FEST I TELL YOU FitFortDanga posted:When I went to see Schindler's List, the first time Amon Goeth appears onscreen, I shouted out "ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!" and the whole audience cheered and asked for my autograph. It was awesome. Adrianics posted:Just like that time I went to see Atonement and when that faggy guy with the stupid moustache gave the chocolate to that kid I yelled 'YOU GONNA GET RAPED' and I swear that the audience was laughing so hard they had to stop the film for a few minutes Zach Hoagie posted:When I watched No Country for Old Men I yelled out "ADDITIONAL PYLONS" then Jesus came from heaven itself to give me a high-five and all the women in the audience formed a line to blow me. jdwalsh posted:Haha, yes. When I watched [POPULAR MOVIE] I yelled out [OBSCURE INTERNET MEME] and [POSITIVE FEEDBACK FROM AUDIENCE] Falstaffs Honor posted:This one time, I saw Meet the Spartans and I said "hey that's not funny" and the audience sacrificed a heifer in my honor E: shoot, I probably should have refreshed before posting
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 09:54 |
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kickascii posted:I was around 12 or 13 when I got a 300 baud modem for my commodore 64. Kid at school had access to pirated games aka “warez" and hooked me up with a list of BBS phone numbers. I finally successfully connected and got into filling out a registration form. I got stumped on the "ANSI or ASCII" question when suddenly the screen went blank and a message slowly scrolled across. It dawned on me that someone was typing the message out in real time and it terrified me for some reason. "you are the worst lamer i have ever seen. never call here again."
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 11:31 |
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flakeloaf posted:i wouldn't download a cat because i don't know how to set up a decent sandbox
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 12:29 |
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Sleeveless posted:Modern GBS is a Breitbart FYAD-light, there's no room for jokes. This is a really bad quote.
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 14:55 |
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Regarding inevitability of smart, driverless cars:ReelBigLizard posted:We're howling down the 12 lane hyperway now, the old contraband R1 and me. An old crash-salvage track bike, it wasn't registered when the black boxes became mandatory and I managed to clone a licence chip from another registered bike of the same colour. I'm riding the faded painted remains of a lane divider, dead centre of the road, they painted them on when the road was new. They never bothered to re-paint them.
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 15:09 |
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:This is a really bad quote. It wasn't a quote until you made it one. It's all your fault.
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# ? Dec 4, 2015 15:24 |
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Sham bam bamina! posted:Those are riffs on an old Star Trek episode. Yeah, but it's fun imagining a beatnik reading them in a coffee shop. Anyway, new AI quote from a discussion of self-driving cars: Edit: God drat it. Edit 2: Next section: ReelBigLizard posted:The old Yoshimura pipe is pumping out a high, flat howl somewhere behind me now. The speedo has all but frozen at 184mph and the commuter pods are struggling to get out of the way without jostling the digitally sedated inhabitants. I catch flashes of startled faces through toughened glass and allow myself a little smirk thinking about hot, spilled lattes flying around the cabins. A pole bristling with sensors and antennae marks 3 miles to the exit, one minute at this speed but I'll have to start slowing down before then. Exit 0x2AF3 is a rough splice onto an old section of legacy highway going east into the rough country and it's used so little that there is often a fine film of green moss on the surface. A Shitty Reporter has a new favorite as of 18:52 on Dec 4, 2015 |
# ? Dec 4, 2015 18:13 |
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tbh that's better than what neal stephenson grinds out.
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 02:03 |
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and there's more!ReelBigLizard posted:Seven or eight pods from the trailing group have split off into a C-shaped formation in my blind spot and now they're strafing towards me at an alarming speed. As I whip my head back towards the exit lane I'm left with the impression of faces obscured by various devices livecasting the imminent arrest, backlit by red interior lighting. The entertainment systems will be busy telling the occupants to remain calm while their vehicles are commandeered for important law enforcement business. ReelBigLizard posted:As the bike runs up against the barrier the bars twitch and I know I'm just along for the ride now. I keep the throttle steady as the corner tightens and I get pushed down into the seat, not daring to change a single input. As my head gets pushed down towards the tank I catch a glimpse of something in the mirror. It must be one of the pods, the red light is now complimented by orange hazard lights flashing as the traction control slowly loses the fight with the moss. In normal operations the TC in these things would have had no trouble but evidently the law enforcement protocols were overriding several safety interlocks for improved performance. ReelBigLizard posted:In Kampala, First Technician Mbire finally remembers to breathe as the call gets auto-prioritised up to Task Co-ordinator Onek.
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 02:34 |
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Ok its too much now
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 02:36 |
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When does it turn into a thinly-veiled plagiarization of Red Barchetta
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 02:38 |
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StringOfLetters posted:Are they going to dramatically re-work the Stress system, or is that just how it is? A lot of it doesn't make much sense. After the fifth or sixth time getting a cup full of blood thrown at you, you know, you're going to be pretty soaked already, it's not going to keep being a startling new development. Normal Adult Human posted:Hey nerd im gonna give you six swirlies and each time you'll cry a little harder
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 04:23 |
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From the Wikipedia quotes thread in YOSPOS:Improbable Lobster posted:The September 11, 2001 attacks drastically changed the fashion world. Denim became hugely popular, with almost all forms of it being distressed. computer parts posted:so i wonder which national crisis brought on yoga pants theflyingexecutive posted:the great pumpkin spice famine of 08 theflyingexecutive posted:times were lean, woo girls were collapsing in their uggs, bodies of basic bitches bundled like the brawny man's bounty
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 16:22 |
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ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:Another amazing Triticum Guzzler post. Anyone have links to the threads in the "proposals"? I've read the zipline one and obviously the last one is an entire subforum.
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 20:49 |
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There's not much I like better in life than a cruel burn out of nowhere.infernal machines posted:
Moist von Lipwig posted:lol i just realized i can see my girlfriends office in this pic Hogge Wild posted:the street?
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# ? Dec 5, 2015 22:44 |
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Trig Discipline posted:There's not much I like better in life than a cruel burn out of nowhere. agreed aw man i had a good one but its gone now. gently caress everything.
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 04:36 |
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Snapchat A Titty posted:gently caress everything. I see you take after your mother.
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 04:57 |
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I'd like to request that age-old quote about weight loss, it's in the form of the dialog of a lady on the phone with her friend Barb. She talks about what she ate all day (a ton of unhealthy poo poo) and then laments how the weight just won't come off! Need it as motivation to mind what the hell I eat.
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 05:03 |
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VanSandman posted:I see you take after your mother. 9.1
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 05:11 |
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On the Richter scale, maybe.
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 05:22 |
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Bertrand Hustle posted:On the Richter scale, maybe. You know drat well measures of magnitude do not equal measures of weight.
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 05:54 |
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coronatae posted:I'd like to request that age-old quote about weight loss, it's in the form of the dialog of a lady on the phone with her friend Barb. She talks about what she ate all day (a ton of unhealthy poo poo) and then laments how the weight just won't come off! anyway like I was saying, Barb, I don't understand why I can't keep weight off, why today I didn't even have breakfast, just grabbed a quick bagel and creame chease and a glass of OJ from the fridge! I was starving from skiping breakfast but I kept to my diet and all I had was a chef salad you know the kind with like cheese and ham and eggs and stuff, goes great with some ranch, and two slices of that garlic bread they make on thursdays. Of course it was Pam's birthday at the office so I had a little slice of the cake. I was feelin' a little tired around 2:30 so I went to the cafeteria and grabbed some coffee to wake me up, it was great they had the 24 oz carmelattaccinos on sale for $3.85, anyway the coffee woke me right up and I made it through the day, didn't want that left over cake to go to waste so I had another slice before leaving. And all I had for dinner was chicken! Chicken is good for you! And this recipe was so good, too. You take the chicken and roll it in egg, then bread crumbs, and fry it for about 5 minutes, then pour some cream sauce and a sack of cheese on the top and cook it for about 30 minutes, it comes out SO good it's like a pure orgasm, orgasming into your mouth anyway just some vegitables on the side, i think it was cream corn, and some mashed potatoes just like gramma used to make and she was never fat, she didn't even have a job all she did was stay at home while dad worked and spend most of the day working the land and wrangling five kids but yeah that chicken was great, and since I was "good" today with skipping breakfast and just have salad for lunch I figured I'd treat myself to a nice bowl of ice cream before bed, with some of that butterscotch sauce on top. Bobby didn't finish his, said something about the cream corn making him sick, so I ate that up too just so it didn't go to waste so yeah as you can see I'm a VERY conservative eater but these stubborn pounds just will NOT go away. Oh well must be genetic, ahh it's getting close to bed time OOOHH macguyver reruns, better make some microwave popcorn have you tried this kind Butter Explosion, you can tell it's good cause the guy on the picture is surfing on a wave of butter anyway talk to you later
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 09:51 |
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LadyAmbien posted:For real. I would LOVE to see every response coupled with a picture of themselves. numberoneposter posted:ive been working out a bone to pick posted:mmm I love a hairless pussy Germstore posted:how can you tell he's bald with the bike helmet on?
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 11:59 |
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many johnnys posted:International Student: Snake... do you... like me?
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 23:17 |
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ahaha what a thread
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# ? Dec 6, 2015 23:27 |
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Meg From Family Guy posted:The only time passion enters into his voice is when he mentions islam. Chokes McGee posted:Shut up, Meg.
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# ? Dec 7, 2015 08:17 |
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maniacdevnull posted:*dives over pile of other posters and shouting* No ring
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# ? Dec 7, 2015 23:00 |
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# ? May 11, 2024 09:45 |
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Sham bam bamina! posted:ahaha what a thread Seriously, it's magic. "Goons help this girl might like me or may want to be friends with me, either way I'm very uncomfortable should I consult an authority figure or what"
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# ? Dec 7, 2015 23:17 |