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i lease my awesome phone from a phone carrier. people who buy are suckers
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Dec 5, 2015 10:33
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i ffail to snype my own posts
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Dec 5, 2015 10:34
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hmmm.. this pitcher of bud light is kind of expensive, i dont know that we need another one, let's settle up and hit the 7/11 and dirnk back at my apartment oh and we're gonna split the check right?
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Dec 5, 2015 10:34
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oh yeah i usually wait until the weekend to steal a lot of food from the break room... i mean its free and i _do_ work hard
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Dec 5, 2015 10:35
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hmmm... why would i buy the apple when I can get a lenovo for $300??? gotta spend smart, gotta make it past the 15th
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Dec 5, 2015 10:35
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i am not great at planning, the accounting class at the community college was boring so i only went twice. yeah im pretty much broke from the 1st - 15th a month since my rent bill is 80% of my paycheck. but it's worth it, I am building up credit and live in a great place!
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Dec 5, 2015 10:36
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I chose the cheaper health insurance plan. It doesn't cover anything until I meet the $3000 deductible but after that everything's free
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Dec 5, 2015 11:24
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here check out this hilarious thing from a TV show that I recorded with my phone camera
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Dec 5, 2015 15:55
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Jimmy Carter posted:here check out this hilarious thing from a TV show that I recorded with my phone camera I tried my very best to sit still
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Dec 5, 2015 15:56
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yeah man but why would you work overtime? all that extra money just goes to taxes
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Dec 5, 2015 16:06
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I hope my annual raise doesn't put me In a higher tax bracket, because then I'll actually make less
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Dec 5, 2015 16:13
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uncurable mlady posted:I hope my annual raise doesn't put me In a higher tax bracket, because then I'll actually make less
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Dec 5, 2015 16:16
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A Pinball Wizard posted:I chose the cheaper health insurance plan. It doesn't cover anything until I meet the $3000 deductible but after that everything's free it's not like you're going to use it anyway. only other people get sick
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Dec 5, 2015 16:26
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Barnyard Protein posted:this but irl
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Dec 5, 2015 16:42
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hell yeah vine owns!
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Dec 5, 2015 16:48
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im thinking about getting into home brewing
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Dec 5, 2015 17:33
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At the crack of dawn every day, I crawl out of bed. My bones and muscles are aching; I can't even remember the last time I had a good night's sleep. With all the grace of a drunk elephant, I trundle my way towards the bathroom down the hallway. When the dog stumbles to get out of my way (I still accidentally kick it at least once a month), my wife stirs awake momentarily. She mutters something under her breath about how she wishes her life was different, and how she didn't have two kids with an oaf like me. Today I'm lucky, because I didn't manage to step on any of the kids' toys during my trek to the bathroom. I flick on the light, and my eyes sear in pain to the sudden burst of light. I wince, but at this point, the pain is simply part of the normal morning routine. Once my eyes adjust to the bright bathroom lights (we sprung for LED bulbs at a recent Lowe's sale), I take a full look at myself. My shirt off, I realize that I have the tits of a 120 pound woman in her twenties. For a brief moment, I think back to my wife when we met. Then I notice the array of thick, dark hair that covers my chest, and extends down past my bulging, distended, round belly. Further down from that ball of lard brought on by decades of Milwaukee's Best, I see my stained boxer shorts. The fabric is so worn that it's been rendered nearly transparent. The button popped off some time in 2011, and from the open flap, I can see the tip of my penis sticking out. It's small, and withered, hiding from the cold morning air within its protective foreskin. I reach down to tuck it back in, my hand brushing up against several ingrown hairs that have developed along my shaft. The same hand that fondled my penis now moves up, to brush at my hair. I think the bald spot's getting bigger. With a maudlin sigh, I slip my boxers down to my ankles and sit down upon my freezing, porcelain throne. What begins is best described as a violent, occasionally bloody test of my inner fortitude, as I push out last night's Ruby Tuesday. My daughter's choice, I assure you, as she finally worked her way to a "B" in Social Studies this quarter. If it were up to me, I would have chosen Outback. My thoughts continue as I squeeze out a troubling black mass. I have to be quick. The wife and kids will be up soon, and the cacophony of the day will begin. Until then, in these few precious minutes, I meditate and poo poo.
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Dec 5, 2015 19:05
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uncurable mlady posted:I hope my annual raise doesn't put me In a higher tax bracket, because then I'll actually make less
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Dec 5, 2015 19:17
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Local businesses are the worst! I tried one once and they didn't take my Discover! Never again.
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Dec 5, 2015 19:51
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Think I'll splurge on the cheese plate during the flight. My per diam is only half because its a traveling day but the trip went really well so I should reward myself 
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Dec 5, 2015 19:58
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maniacdevnull posted:Local businesses are the worst! I tried one once and they didn't take my Discover! Never again. I cannot believe how much more expensive this local store is over Amazon.
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Dec 5, 2015 20:59
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I'm cutting the cord.
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Dec 5, 2015 21:11
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eric posted:I'm cutting the cord. honestly, i've never had a problem with Comcast. it seems like great service aside from the outages, and like all of them will have that. all the haters are just dicks looking for poo poo to complain about.
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Dec 5, 2015 21:16
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my license was suspended again for a dui. i still keep driving though, i would be embarrassed to be seen on public transit
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Dec 5, 2015 21:22
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Mr. Apollo posted:my license was suspended again for a dui. i still keep driving though, i would be embarrassed to be seen on public transit i drive better when im drunk 
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Dec 5, 2015 21:45
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got my parents to co-sign my car loan
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Dec 5, 2015 21:57
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uncurable mlady posted:I hope my annual raise doesn't put me In a higher tax bracket, because then I'll actually make less
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Dec 6, 2015 02:30
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Love this vintage Egan Yardley Fail
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Dec 6, 2015 02:53
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I don't mind working late nights on the weekends, even though I don't make overtime. nobody interrupts my taytay on my earbuds, and it's kinda cool when they turn out the lights. reminds me of the lockins at church when I was a kid.
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Dec 6, 2015 03:19
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*charges Christmas gifts to credit card* *still has a balance from the last 3 Christmases*
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Dec 6, 2015 03:33
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actually, it's about ethics in gaming journalism
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Dec 6, 2015 04:36
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i hope this company offers me at least $60k, that would probably be enough for me to move away from my friends (  )
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Dec 6, 2015 04:48
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i like living in the suburbs, this way i can have a yard for the kids to play in and it's only a 50 minute drive to work in the morning
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Dec 6, 2015 04:51
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I'm pretty sure a katana could easily bisect a knight wearing full plate with a simple vertical slash.
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Dec 6, 2015 07:26
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wide stance posted:I'm pretty sure a katana could easily bisect a knight wearing full plate with a simple vertical slash. furthermore i am in possession of the muscles required to make that happen
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Dec 6, 2015 07:33
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Mr. Apollo posted:actually, it's about ethnics in gaming journalism
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Dec 6, 2015 10:14
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home defense gun
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Dec 6, 2015 10:19
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Wild EEPROM posted:home defense gun Home defense dog
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Dec 6, 2015 10:38
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Smythe posted:Home defense dog a giant pitbull named max that i struggle to feed two days before payday hope u like top ramen buddy
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Dec 6, 2015 10:48
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| # ? May 29, 2024 07:58 |
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as a lower five figgsman i thoroughly identify with the struggles of the higher five figgsman
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Dec 6, 2015 12:01
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