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Solice Kirsk posted:Actually won't be too bad of a way to go. Slip off into a beautiful sleep and never wake up again. Not the way I'd want to go, but still pretty good as far as deaths are concerned. I want my death to involve a chainsaw, a dirt bike, and some pissed off bears
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Mar 3, 2016 23:45
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Literally The Worst posted:I want my death to involve a chainsaw, a dirt bike, and some pissed off bears Same.
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Mar 3, 2016 23:46
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Literally The Worst posted:I want my death to involve a chainsaw, a dirt bike, and some pissed off bears Woah, back of the line buddy. I didn't buy my Suicide-Chainsaw-Dirtbrike Bear-Battle Fantasy Camp tickets a year in advance so some Johnny Come Lately can waltz in and awesomely die before me
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Mar 4, 2016 00:46
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I purposely OD'd on a bunch of narcotics and alcohol (yeah bad idea) and the sensation as I drifted into a coma was not what I had expected. It was pretty terrible feeling all around, I'd much rather die from having my dick stuck in a vag for too long.
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Mar 4, 2016 01:59
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My other ideal death involves seven large breasted women, a small sand dune of cocaine, and a dirt bike
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Mar 4, 2016 02:09
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AnonSpore posted:Sometimes it's the smoke and fire, or explosions Sometimes it's a blood clot working its way loose midflight. 
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Mar 4, 2016 02:29
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ServoMST3K posted:I purposely OD'd on a bunch of narcotics and alcohol (yeah bad idea) and the sensation as I drifted into a coma was not what I had expected. It was pretty terrible feeling all around, I'd much rather die from having my dick stuck in a vag for too long. Don't mean to pry too much, but what was it like? I've done stupid combinations of narcotics and alcohol and benzos and what have you in the past that probably could have killed me but the worst that happened was I peed my bed after passing out on it and I don't remember any negative feelings
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Mar 4, 2016 03:14
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Aesop Poprock posted:Don't mean to pry too much, but what was it like? I've done stupid combinations of narcotics and alcohol and benzos and what have you in the past that probably could have killed me but the worst that happened was I peed my bed after passing out on it and I don't remember any negative feelings I can't speak to their situation, but in mine (with alcohol/benzos/opiates) breathing became a conscious effort every 20 seconds or so. I spent 3 or 4 hours deciding to consciously breathe rather than sleep and die.
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Mar 4, 2016 03:44
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RNG posted:I can't speak to their situation, but in mine (with alcohol/benzos/opiates) breathing became a conscious effort every 20 seconds or so. I spent 3 or 4 hours deciding to consciously breathe rather than sleep and die. That's about when you get super conscious of how slow your heart is beating too. Nothing you can do about it either, just waiting and feeling it slowing and hoping it doesn't stop because you'll have a solid couple seconds of knowing the end is coming.
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Mar 4, 2016 03:49
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Aesop Poprock posted:Don't mean to pry too much, but what was it like? I've done stupid combinations of narcotics and alcohol and benzos and what have you in the past that probably could have killed me but the worst that happened was I peed my bed after passing out on it and I don't remember any negative feelings Basically it skipped the pleasant high/hosed up feeling of smaller mixes of alcohol/drugs and you quickly realize you can't feel/control parts of your body. I recall feeling the loss of sensation in my lower jaw of all places and then it dawned on me that maybe I should call someone and tell them what happened. Can't remember a drat thing after 5-15 minutes after ingesting it. There's very, very little chance of the same thing happening to you unless you swallow a pharmacy like I tried doing.
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Mar 4, 2016 05:25
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Literally The Worst posted:My other ideal death involves seven large breasted women, a small sand dune of cocaine, and a dirt bike Now you're cutting in my line.
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Mar 4, 2016 06:20
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What the gently caress some of you need to learn how to handle your drugs
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Mar 4, 2016 07:11
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pookel posted:He had some kind of mental handicap/impairment, but regularly wrote in mysterious ciphers that no one else could read? Was he autistic? Schizophrenic? It's probably a one time pad, making it essentially unbreakable if the code is in fact random or has a solution known only to the person who wrote it. Another thing no one seems to bring up is that maybe he found the notes. Growing up my friends older brother had some pretty strong mental issues and one of the things he would do was just sort of collect notes and things he found because he didn't have a great grasp on what made certain things people wrote down (like his medication info and what bus to take) really important and so when he saw notes he would grab them because he assumed they shouldn't be lost.
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Mar 4, 2016 08:02
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Apraxin posted:It's maybe the weirdest thing I've ever seen in a serious news program (possibly Wow, today they would have bleeped out the goddamn (Or at least god) Literally The Worst posted:I want my death to involve a chainsaw, a dirt bike, and some pissed off bears A parachute not opening, that's a way to die.
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Mar 4, 2016 08:05
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audio for desperate screaming):
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ElwoodCuse posted:A parachute not opening, that's a way to die. I like to think after a little bit you just kind of go "gently caress it." and just ride it out.
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Mar 4, 2016 09:41
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ElwoodCuse posted:Wow, today they would have bleeped out the goddamn (Or at least god) Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go....
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Mar 4, 2016 09:53
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Degenerate Star posted:If it's 'penis captivus' like the article suggested, that means that it's her muscles refusing to let go of him, not his dick that's the problem. quote:Scanzoni's patient was "a completely healthy young woman, married for six months". She and her husband had to abstain from sexual intercourse because her intense vaginal contractions were "most painful to him and ... did on several occasions end in a spasm ... which sometimes lasted more than ten minutes and made it impossible for the couple to separate". quote:In her memoir An Impossible Woman (1975), Graham Greene's friend Dottoressa Elisabeth Moor recounts how she was once urgently called to the Hotel Eden-Paradiso in Anacapri, Italy. "And there I found a young German girl, in the bathtub in a pool of blood, who begged me to do what I could; I should help her as she was bleeding to death" from "a tear in the vagina". The girl had been having sex with a man and her vagina had clamped tightly around his swollen penis. In freeing his penis, the man had inflicted "a heavily bleeding tear. A very deep wound." He had then fled. After Dottoressa Moor had stanched the bleeding, she and a colleague she had summoned stitched the girl up. "She healed very well." Dottoressa Moor adds, "These cases are not as rare as you think." She mentions – though only as hearsay – "a much worse case" involving a Swiss girl that occurred in Lucerne, Switzerland, during the war and resulted in "dreadful injuries" when the man panicked: "they had got stuck inside each other. It needed two or three doctors to help to undo them."[3] 
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Mar 4, 2016 10:28
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Marijuana Nihilist posted:What the gently caress some of you need to learn how to handle your drugs I like to eyeball my doses, no biggie. And I'll share the trip reports afterward so we can learn from the experience; after all, it's all about
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Mar 4, 2016 10:43
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Ms Boods posted:Getting caught in the gears of a combine... having your nuts bit off by a Laplander, that's the way I wanna go.... Oh deer...
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Mar 4, 2016 11:31
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What the gently caress. I literally didn't know humans could get stuck together like cats or dogs if they hosed and I really don't appreciate this information
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Mar 4, 2016 11:37
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Aesop Poprock posted:What the gently caress. I literally didn't know humans could get stuck together like cats or dogs if they hosed and I really don't appreciate this information In form and moving how express and admirable! In action how like an Angel! in apprehension how like a god! The beauty of the world! The paragon of animals!
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Mar 4, 2016 12:02
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In the spirit of Freudian vagina dentata has the fish that swims up the urethra and deploys spikes been mentioned yet e: please no https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru
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Mar 4, 2016 14:03
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Literally The Worst posted:My other ideal death involves seven large breasted women, a small sand dune of cocaine, and a dirt bike
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Mar 4, 2016 14:12
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vaguely posted:you freaked out in a chat thread because your cat peed on a wall socket and you thought your house was going to burn down Well, he did specify 'ideal' death, and not 'most likely' death.
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Mar 4, 2016 15:17
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vaguely posted:you freaked out in a chat thread because your cat peed on a wall socket and you thought your house was going to burn down To be fair, cat piss guy was a different dude. Literally the Worst was the one who constantly whined about not having money or a job, then posted pictures of the three hundred dollar robot man toy he'd just bought.
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Mar 4, 2016 15:25
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Dylanthulhu posted:I like to think after a little bit you just kind of go "gently caress it." and just ride it out. The running joke is, if your reserve malfunctions, aim for your rigger's (reserve packer) car.
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Mar 4, 2016 18:18
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vaguely posted:you freaked out in a chat thread because your cat peed on a wall socket and you thought your house was going to burn down I definitely did not because I have only had one cat in the last ten or fifteen years and he never peed on a light socket that I know of poo poo on my roommate when she was bringing him home, though. That was funny.
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Mar 4, 2016 20:10
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Crow Jane posted:To be fair, cat piss guy was a different dude. Literally the Worst was the one who constantly whined about not having money or a job, then posted pictures of the three hundred dollar robot man toy he'd just bought. Not having a job came after that, and coincidentally was about the same time I was literally so manic that I was hallucinating for most of a month So that was just a real bad time for me, overall
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Mar 4, 2016 20:11
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Literally The Worst posted:Not having a job came after that, and coincidentally was about the same time I was literally so manic that I was hallucinating for most of a month Wow I really care a lot. Bitch
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Mar 4, 2016 20:23
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Nobody talk about yourself in this thread unless you finally get confirmation from the FBI that your grandpa was the Chicago Tylenol killer.
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Mar 4, 2016 20:24
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Jack Gladney posted:Nobody talk about yourself in this thread unless you finally get confirmation from the FBI that your grandpa was the Chicago Tylenol killer. Whatever happened with that, anyway?
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Mar 4, 2016 20:30
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Jack Gladney posted:Nobody talk about yourself in this thread unless you finally get confirmation from the FBI that your grandpa was the Chicago Tylenol killer. I don't know about that, but I think my Senator may be the Zodiac killer...
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Mar 4, 2016 20:31
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HUNDU THE BEAST GOD posted:Whatever happened with that, anyway? The person came back from contacting the Feds, said the FBI 'would look into it' and I think that was that.
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Mar 4, 2016 21:05
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Wedemeyer posted:The person came back from contacting the Feds, said the FBI 'would look into it' and I think that was that. Yeah didn't seem like there was really enough evidence for them to actually do anything or even look into it further
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Mar 4, 2016 21:30
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Literally The Worst posted:I definitely did not because I have only had one cat in the last ten or fifteen years and he never peed on a light socket that I know of sorry for making GBS threads up the thread, friends! have some photos of an abandoned theme park that i intend to get drunk in next halloween   
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Mar 4, 2016 21:42
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vaguely posted:guess i was thinking of a different sad man Talk about a pain in the ol' Gulliver.
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Mar 4, 2016 22:35
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Choco1980 posted:Oh deer... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n08mNz9f0FQ&t=56s The Naked Gun is a series that everyone should be made to recognize quotes from. quote:Prior to the delivery of this instrument of conveyance, the grantee herein has been advised by the grantor that the premises above described have been filled, in whole or in part, to the present grade level thereof with waste products resulting from the manufacturing of chemicals by the grantor at its plant in the City of Niagara Falls, New York, and the grantee assumes all risk and liability incident to the use thereof. It is therefore understood and agreed that, as a part of the consideration for this conveyance and as a condition thereof, no claim, suit, action or demand of any nature whatsoever shall ever be made by the grantee, its successors or assigns, against the grantor, its successors or assigns, for injury to a person or persons, including death resulting therefrom, or loss of or damage to property caused by, in connection with or by reason of the presence of said industrial wastes. It is further agreed as a condition hereof that each subsequent conveyance of the aforesaid lands shall be made subject to the foregoing provisions and conditions. This was a clause in the sale of the Love Canal toxic waste dump to the Niagara Falls City School District in 1953. Initially the owner Hooker Chemical Company was against the sale and were upfront about why it was such a bad idea. After a time of continued insistence from school representatives, the company realized that they had an opportunity to unload a major liability. The entire area was then sold for a dollar with the above quoted clause. In the span of a decade, Hooker Chemical had managed to dispose of 21,000 tons of chemical waste right up to the year of sale. The first school (yes FIRST) was built 85 feet away from the preferred location when digging found clusters of 55 gallon barrels filled with toxic waste in two separate locations. A second school was made two years later only six blocks away. The remaining land was later sold to property developers without any mention of the site history or the continued discovery of more barrels. This managed to make things worse as construction punctured clay linings that kept toxins from being spread by rainwater. The only outlet for this water to the Niagara River was then cut off by the construction of an expressway. Waste continued to concentrate for two decades before alarms were raised in the late seventies. The EPA Administrator for the region stated "I visited the canal area at that time. Corroding waste-disposal drums could be seen breaking up through the grounds of backyards. Trees and gardens were turning black and dying. One entire swimming pool had been had been popped up from its foundation, afloat now on a small sea of chemicals. Puddles of noxious substances were pointed out to me by the residents. Some of these puddles were in their yards, some were in their basements, others yet were on the school grounds. Everywhere the air had a faint, choking smell. Children returned from play with burns on their hands and faces." The result was the first time that US Congress approved emergency funding for something other than a natural disaster. Now the word superfund is as toxic as the waste they are intended to clean up. Well worth the time to read through
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Mar 4, 2016 23:51
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Wedemeyer posted:The person came back from contacting the Feds, said the FBI 'would look into it' and I think that was that. Always wanted a nice capper to that story. Oh well.
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Mar 5, 2016 00:26
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Harold Stassen posted:In the spirit of Freudian vagina dentata has the fish that swims up the urethra and deploys spikes been mentioned yet That's just a myth, so far no one's found conclusive evidence of it ever happening. Wikipedia posted:These smaller species are known for an alleged tendency to invade and parasitise the human urethra; however, despite ethnological reports dating back to the late 19th century,[5] the first documented case of the removal of a candiru from a human urethra did not occur until 1997, and even that incident has remained a matter of controversy. Wikipedia posted:When subsequently interviewed, Spotte stated that even if a person were to urinate while "submerged in a stream where candiru live", the odds of that person being attacked by candiru are "(a)bout the same as being struck by lightning while simultaneously being eaten by a shark." [22]
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Mar 6, 2016 05:53
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Another horrifying elevator story. Take the stairs, everyone.quote:Elevator maintenance men returning to work after a month-long break for Chinese new year made a horrific discovery last week when they opened the cab of a broken lift and found the body of a woman who had been trapped inside since late January and starved to death.
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Mar 6, 2016 14:20
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