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God the record of the Subterranean Animists is just insane. Seems like the martial trances have been helpful for their all dwarf team.
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Mar 11, 2016 06:40
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| # ? May 11, 2024 16:50 |
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Is Dontellim Pike still available? I'll manage him if no one remotely competent wants him.
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Mar 11, 2016 07:15
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LorrdErnie posted:God the record of the Subterranean Animists is just insane. Seems like the martial trances have been helpful for their all dwarf team. Antwomen who get all their hands chopped off should enter martial trances.
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Mar 11, 2016 07:19
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Holy poo poo That was one of the more intense fights I've seen in the Arena. A couple of unlucky grabs is all it can take to unravel our dwarf solidarity...
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Mar 11, 2016 19:59
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Another way to look at it is: A couple lucky paralyzing blows was all that kept you from losing to a team with my lovely Antwoman on it.
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Mar 11, 2016 21:16
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Spermy Smurf posted:Another way to look at it is: A couple lucky paralyzing blows was all that kept you from losing to a team with my lovely Antwoman on it. Well, if you want revenge, you just need to run their fight first this round. 
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Mar 11, 2016 21:25
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Spermy Smurf posted:Another way to look at it is: A couple lucky paralyzing blows was all that kept you from losing to a team with my lovely Antwoman on it. Shoulda picked a dwarf like me.
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Mar 11, 2016 21:57
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Bought a solid helmet for poor Tyler, then blew the rest of my points on skills. Hopefully someone takes a fatal tail lash to the face due to my point in kicking.
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Mar 11, 2016 23:08
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I'm going to run some fights this weekend, so  get your fighter updates in
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Mar 11, 2016 23:39
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The FARTSTORM has no need for updates at his time. Sure, there's the little matter of his leather pants being slashed to ribbons during his last fight but details. Besides, they breathe better this way.
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Mar 12, 2016 00:07
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Pittsburgh Lambic posted:The FARTSTORM has no need for updates at his time. Sure, there's the little matter of his leather pants being slashed to ribbons during his last fight but details. Besides, they breathe better this way. If you buy armor, someone is just going to steal it and beat you with it, yeah.
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Mar 12, 2016 00:20
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I have thrown in my 6k with foolish bets at the last second to ensure I get the worst possible odds. I forgot to keep any leftover cash for bribes so I can't imagine this round will end well for me.
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Mar 12, 2016 03:42
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ZeeToo posted:I'm going to run some fights this weekend, so Done
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Mar 12, 2016 07:06
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Cant afford anything at this stage, not doing poo poo.
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Mar 12, 2016 08:25
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According to Mr. Rogers we are perfect just the way we are.
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Mar 12, 2016 15:55
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Random rear end in a top hat posted:Is Dontellim Pike still available? I'll manage him if no one remotely competent wants him. Yes you can, but you'll need to follow the instructions to get your account activated on the site first.
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Mar 13, 2016 18:03
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Round 12, Fight 8  Cool Rad Awesome Pals is on the left side of the arena. Punc Hant (Silverminnow) is a female soldier ant woman. She is empty handed and wears a steel breast plate and steel gauntlets. BS-45 "Apeliminator" (alcharagia) is a male strangler. He wields a copper pick and wears an iron cap. Jimbo Akimbo (Bad Munki) is a male dwarf. He wields two copper war hammers and wears an iron cap, an iron mail shirt, iron gauntlets, and iron low boots. The Krying Bowbold Returns! (Krysmphoenix) is a female kobold. She wields a steel bow and wears no armor. Team Laser Explosion is on the right side of the arena. Anthony (dasmause) is a male tigerman. He is empty handed and wears an iron helm, an iron mail shirt, iron greaves, iron gauntlets, and iron low boots. Mogwai (Dark Off) is a female gremlin. She wields a copper large dagger and a silver buckler and wears a copper helm. Molegrim (Maugrim) is a male molemarian. He wields a copper spear and wears a bronze helm, copper gauntlets, and bronze high boots. Turquoise Tonic (Hihohe) is a male human. He wields a silver mace and wears an iron cap, an iron mail shirt, leather leggings, leather gauntlets, and leather low boots.  Cool Rad Awesome Pals is a 1.23 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 863.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 703.00 dwarfbucks for Team Laser Explosion. Sometimes no one much bets on fights. I still love these teams, I just had a limit on how much money I had to bet. For some reason.  Krying shoots through the enemy line. Molegrim is the one who actually lands the first attack, putting a hole in Apeliminator's kidney. Turquoise takes a shot at Jimbo. Anthony punches Punc in the head. The ant goes "squish". CRAP's front line is a little more outnumbered than usual.  Jimbo dodges a step back. That leaves Apeliminator a little surrounded. Molegrim puts an unpleasant hole in Apeliminator's foot.Turquoise and Molegrim take another round on Apeliminator, who surrenders to pain.  Krying shoots again. As it's in the air, Mogwai stabs Apeliminator through the skull. The arrow hits now, ripping through Anthony's spine and doing the first damage of any sort to team Laser Explosion this fight.  Everyone goes after Jimbo. Molegrim puts that same copper spear in Jimbo's leg, and the dwarf is floored. Krying is still trying to pull the whole team's weight, and she throws her arrow into Molegrim's leg. Jimbo, meanwhile, is busily trying to defend himself, which is working okay for now, but he's horribly outnumbered. The whole team decides to bit Jimbo. Mogwai and Anthony bite his thighs, then Molegrm bites him in the head. Jimbo is out. Only Turquoise isn't really into this whole thing, and just bashes the dwarf with his mace instead. After everyone's had a bite, Molegrim stabs Jimbo in his well-bitten skull and kills him.  Another arrow hits Molegrim. Plucky Krying isn't giving up yet. The visitors surround her and she begins to take damage. She takes a zero-distance shot at Mogwai and still misses. Mogwai and Molegrim finish her off; Molegrim takes the lethal stroke. Kills Anthony: 1 Molegrim: 2 Mogwai: 1 Combat Log
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Mar 14, 2016 03:16
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I think Jimbo's wailing was justified, on account of all the gnashing of teeth.
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Mar 14, 2016 03:21
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An interesting result for the Explosion. Their kill leader doesn't get on the scoresheet, so Molegrim gets within one death of taking that title. Mogwai and Anthony are barely blooded and double their kill counts, putting them on par with Apeliminator. Sometimes bows work, sometimes not.
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Mar 14, 2016 03:27
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v v
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Mar 14, 2016 03:30
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That was a lot of dudes biting and shaking one guy. And in a fight before he had like two dudes eating his goddamn legs. Why does everyone want to bite this guy?
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Mar 14, 2016 05:17
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in the future im going to have to not give my tiny guy an axe since it just makes people bite and biting is actually super loving powerful
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Mar 14, 2016 05:32
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Ramc posted:Why does everyone want to bite this guy? Biting Bad Munki is a pretty normal and natural impulse.
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Mar 14, 2016 05:35
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Tiler Kiwi posted:in the future im going to have to not give my tiny guy an axe since it just makes people bite and biting is actually super loving powerful Biting is situational but neat.
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Mar 14, 2016 05:41
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when youre a small fighter it fucks you up badly since its a wrestling attack, and being wrestled means you cant dodge so you just get shaken around until you pass out from pain against a dude missing his dumb rear end arms e: really the whole "kobold with an axe" fails for reasons i totally didnt expect. albrik has no problem hewing limbs but hewing off limbs is surprisingly ineffective compared to things like stabbing which cause debilitating pain and it invites the style of attack that small fighters are not really capable of dealing with. that and any decent armor just shits on the whole parade since it seems like approx 0% of the force from the blow becomes blunt damage. stabbing attacks seem to go through armor a lot more consistently; i should have gone with my initial impulse and gotten a spear. Tiler Kiwi fucked around with this message at 05:47 on Mar 14, 2016 |
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Mar 14, 2016 05:43
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Tiler Kiwi posted:when youre a small fighter it fucks you up badly since its a wrestling attack, and being wrestled means you cant dodge so you just get shaken around until you pass out from pain against a dude missing his dumb rear end arms Albrik is fun to watch though, and not exactly ineffective. Don't be too hard on him
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Mar 14, 2016 08:59
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You don't lead the kills if you're crap. Albrik does solid work.
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Mar 14, 2016 09:02
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im not angry at him just disappointed
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Mar 14, 2016 10:53
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Hey Munki, your fighter looked liked Antwoman out there. By that I mean he sucked.
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Mar 14, 2016 11:56
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Spermy Smurf posted:Hey Munki, your fighter looked liked Antwoman out there. By that I mean he sucked. Welp, when you're accused of sucking by the preeminent expert in the field, there's not much argument to be made. Gotta trust all that experience.
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Mar 14, 2016 14:49
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Recognize. 
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Mar 14, 2016 15:19
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Spermy Smurf posted:Recognize. I recognize the need for more blooood.
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Mar 15, 2016 03:38
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Poor Punc.quote:Anthony (Laser Explosion) punches Punc Hant (CRAP) in the head with his left hand and the injured part explodes into gore! This is the only mention of Punc in the logs at all. 
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Mar 15, 2016 03:41
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SynthOrange posted:Poor Punc. Punc is dead.
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Mar 15, 2016 04:27
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SynthOrange posted:Poor Punc. Personally my favorite fight so far just because of this. Tunicate posted:Punc is dead. Also this. At least she isn't unblooded, somehow.
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Mar 15, 2016 05:32
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It's almost as if helmets are important.
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Mar 15, 2016 08:19
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Splode posted:It's almost as if helmets are important. At least if your head is basically modeled like an egg.
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Mar 15, 2016 22:48
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Subterranean Animists vs. The Plump Helmets is in process... Might not be our shortest fight ever, folks.
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Mar 16, 2016 02:37
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ZeeToo posted:Subterranean Animists vs. The Plump Helmets is in process... 
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Mar 16, 2016 02:49
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| # ? May 11, 2024 16:50 |
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Round 12, Fight 6  Subterranean Animists is on the left side of the arena. Braun Strowman (Frozen_Flame) is a female soldier ant woman. She wields three copper short swords and wears an iron helm, two copper mail shirts, iron leggings, and iron gauntlets. Baldwin (captaindirtnap) is a male dwarf. He wields an iron spear and a wooden shield and wears an iron helm, an iron mail shirt, iron gauntlets, and steel low boots. Qwarf (C7ty1) is a male dwarf. He wields an iron spear and a wooden shield and wears an iron helm, an iron breast plate, iron greaves, and iron gauntlets. Dusseldwarf (decoy badger) is a female dwarf. She wields an iron spear and a wooden shield and wears an iron mail shirt, iron leggings, iron gauntlets, and iron low boots. The Plump Helmets is on the right side of the arena. Dory (my dad) is a female minotaur. She wields two copper spears and wears a bronze cap, leather armor, a bronze mail shirt, bronze gauntlets, and bronze high boots. James LargeSausage (Afriscipio) is a male human. He wields an iron halberd and wears an iron helm, an iron mail shirt, iron leggings, iron gauntlets, and iron low boots. Josie the Bludgeonatrix (Ramc) is a female elf. She wields a copper mace and a wooden shield and wears leather armor, leather gauntlets, and leather high boots. Return of Panty Thief (Mr. Vile) is a male yeti. He is empty handed and wears a bronze helm, a bronze breast plate, bronze greaves, bronze gauntlets, and bronze low boots.  Subterranean Animists is a 1.08 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 20610.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 19152.00 dwarfbucks for The Plump Helmets. The number one and number three ranked teams, both tops of their divisions, and the highest bet total on a single match this entire tournament. Maybe ever. This one is going to be a good fight, I'm sure; it's certainly a bit of a meaningful one. I missed the screenshot, but Qwarf and Panty Thief lag slightly as these top teams come together. All three of the spear dwarves immediately attack Josie. She parries Baldwin, but the other two put spears in her leg and arm, dealing serious harm. She drops her mace and surrenders to pain. God drat, when the Animists are on, they are on. Baldwin moves on, and stabs Dory in the gut. Dusseldwarf smashes out Panty Thief's teeth. Qwarf stabs Josie to death. Dear god.  Dory takes her first real move, removing one of Braun's four dwarven hands. Braun attempts the same attack back, but she's only holding copper short swords, and Dory is armored with the much tougher bronze. Dusseldwarf keeps at Panty Thief, stabbing his foot.  Panty Thief explodes out of the shower of his own teeth with an unexpected charge, bowling over Dusseldwarf and knocking her to the ground, stunned. Dory, also, is hard at work on Braun, and her chitin cracks and she falls to the ground from the minotaur's spear. James and Dory keep at Braun, and halberd and spear deal further wounds to her extremities. Braun's counter-blow is a punch that knocks Dory's front teeth out. I seem to have accidentally added the spirit of the Hell's Dentists to the match. That was her last effort, though; James puts a halberd through her dwarven thorax, and she checks out. Dusseldwarf is still stunned; Panty Thief yanks her tongue. Off-balance, Dusseldwarf stabs at Panty Thief's leg, but it is deflected.  Teeth rain down. More are still in the air, scattered over several Z-levels. Dusseldwarf joins them in the air, as Panty Thief tosses her by her tongue. James takes a slash at Braun's head, but iron fails to bite at iron. The surprisingly deflection-focused Dory misses an attack, now, as Qwarf stabs through her boot. James takes a second literal stab at Braun's head, and it comes off. One kill on each side. While in mid-air, Dusseldwarf blocks a one-two combo from Panty Thief before she bounces off the ground, completely unharmed. Armor does that. Dusseldwarf stands up, dusts herself off, finds Panty Thief has grabed her thigh, and stabs at the yeti's foot. Her iron fails to penetrate his bronze. He punches her and bruises her. I get the impression this is a duel that could go on for a while, but the other four are even more ineffectively matched.  Not pictured: like six more teeth, some of which have flown outside the arena, but are on other Z-levels Panty Thief finally tries something more effective, taking the thigh he's grabbed and bending it until it pops out of its socket. Again he grabs her tongue.  Today's forecast: cloudy, with a 100% chance of tooth precipitation Panty Thief grabs Dusseldwarf by the neck, then lets go. Dusseldwarf stabs her and fails to penetrate bronze. Then, finally, Dusseldwarf gets over her stun from that first charge Panty Thief did. Finally, finally, someone else does something of note: Baldwin gets an effective stab on Dory's arm. Bone cracks from the spear's force. Dory drops her spear and is out like a light. He left himself exposed, though. James stabs off Baldwin's left arm. Baldwin has lost his shield. Qwarf comboes well with Baldwin, though, and efficiently strikes down Dory. Five fighters remain.  Subterranean Animism fill the very air around James. While Dusseldwarf's back is turned, Panty Thief grabs her boot, clearly meaning to pull it off and beat her to death with it. But it was a ruse. She stabs him in the hand, and even yeti bone cracks this time. It's too much; Panty Thief collapses to the ground like an avalanche, insensate.  Again the phalanx goes after James. His armor is holding, for now, but he's not managing to deal them any further damage in exchange, either. Qwarf sees a chance one more time, and stabs Panty Thief's head apart. James finds an opening. Baldwin's ribs break, and the dwarf is down, though not dead.  It's 2-vs-1 and the last ditch for both sides. Again, a part is severed. It's... James's teeth. More teeth go flying. James's gauntlets prove themselves, time and again. All it'd take for him to win, despite the numerical disadvantage, is a lucky strike or two and his armor to keep doing what it's done all fight. Then... Dusseldwarf stabs his ear off. Qwarf finally manages a solid strike and breaks his ribs. Again. The iron spear collapses his left lung, and James gasps for air. He can manage no more miracles. Over and over the dwarves stab his head. His helm and skull split to one of Dusseldwarf's attacks.   Final disposition of teeth (plus one severed arm). I think. It's definitely quite possible that some of them flew further away and I didn't see them. Our victorious dwarves flash their perfect smiles. Those teeth? Those are Plump Helmet teeth. Kills Qwarf: 3 Dusseldwarf: 1 James LargeSausage: 1 Combat Log
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Mar 16, 2016 03:25
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