Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

Stanko-Prussian: May 22, 2006; CLEAN YOUR ROOM!, 'they' said.
DO YOUR HOMEWORK!, 'they' said.
WHY ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH A CARTOON PONY, 'they' said.
FOR GODSAKE! STOP SHOWING US YOUR BLACKHOLE'!! 'they' said.

When I lit the match....STOP SCREAMING, 'I' said

I'm a big fan of the part a few pages back where derek explained to us all with the aid of actual god drat footnotes how not owned he was.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:28

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 06:53

Solomonic: Jan 3, 2008; INCIPIT SANTA

Happy Sisyphus posted:

sometimes if i wonder if the world would be better off if i had never posted that screencap of Ravane's troll tweet

if CR isn't going to do something dumb for the thread's entertainment, DS has to

it all turned out for the best

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:28

Beet Wagon: Oct 19, 2015

Good night, Thread. If I'm not back tomorrow it's because Derek Smart found my twitter and realized I was a vietcong and sent his DoD buddies after me.

Thanks for all the laffs.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:30

Blue On Blue: Nov 14, 2012

Someone photoshop crobizzle onto 50's head

Mr. I haven't had a real job in over 10 years but suddenly nerds gave me 100+ million, hellooo mansion, porsche, and IWC watches

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:31

CROWS EVERYWHERE: Dec 17, 2012; CAW CAW CAW; Dinosaur Gum

SelenicMartian posted:

That booze-up was to research material for Ye Olde Pube space station, where the floor rotates and money disappears. It'll probably have to be cut for obvious reasons.

I'm posting from ~130 pages in the past to say: I think Sandi would have a problem with Ye Olde Pube space station

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:34

Warcabbit: Apr 26, 2008; Wedge Regret

I checked out that Cryengine bundle.

quote:

Dan (Customer Service)

Mar 15, 19:49

Hi there!

Great question!
You can use these assets in any sort of production you like. No strings. No licensing. No royalties. No special mentions.

Enjoy.

-Dan
Humble Bundle
http://support.humblebundle.com/

So... you know, hey, they're .ma, .mb, .fbx, .max

And some .wavs and .psds

Good stuff, if you're making any games that could use things.

The sounds alone are worth it.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:43

Nebiros: Apr 25, 2013; The scarf is nice.

Beet Wagon posted:

Good night, Thread. If I'm not back tomorrow it's because Derek Smart found my twitter and realized I was a vietcong and sent his DoD buddies after me.

Thanks for all the laffs.

: By the time I'm done beatin' information outta you, you are gonna be beggin' for paaaaaaaarp to come take you away!

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:50

VealCutlet: Dec 21, 2015; I am a marketing god, shave that shit

caughtupwiththethread.gif

This year so far has been like 3 months of edging.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:50

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

New verse of Dancey Cat Hoedown :pgabz:

Derek Smart is a goon in a well, goon in a well, goon in a well,
Uncle Derek Smart is a goon in a well,
He's still digging down yeehaa

# ? Mar 16, 2016 05:53

Solarin: Nov 15, 2007

peter gabriel posted:

I've got a new guitar so double gently caress you star sitizen

Where are the pictures?? I don't have cats but I have 3 acoustic guitars so that will have to count for this thread. Last purchase was a Cordoba C5, really amazingly good value instrument at $300 new. Solid cedar top and feels incredibly light, nice warm mellow sound that makes my terrible playing sound sweeter.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:00

Toops: Nov 5, 2015; -find mood stabilizers
-also,

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

I'm posting from ~130 pages in the past to say: I think Sandi would have a problem with Ye Olde Pube space station

This gives me an idea. I need to make one of the Arenas in SP with walls completely lined in pubes. I'm not sure what will happen when you hit them. But it will NOT be good.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:02

BeefThief: Aug 8, 2007

Toops posted:

This gives me an idea. I need to make one of the Arenas in SP with walls completely lined in pubes. I'm not sure what will happen when you hit them. But it will NOT be good.

How about a shaving game mode where you pilot a Gilette Mach 3 Turbo razor and have to shave before you're dismissed from the job interview.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:04

Ghostlight: Sep 25, 2009; maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me

D_Smart posted:

Nothing to do with that. I have limits to how much fuckeries I can entertain.

Maybe you should move to 64bit.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:08

jaegerx: Sep 10, 2012; Maybe this post will get me on your ignore list!

Derek you're stuck in a well. We already started pissing on you 50 pages ago. It's time to listen to us to get you out of the well. Digging down is not an option.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:15

Sushi in Yiddish: Feb 2, 2008

peter gabriel posted:

Someone was asking to see more of the hands in VR so I made another unfunny elite vid

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1KYloSokw0

Let me know if you don't want these posted, I understand

drat, this makes me really wish I could afford one a these newfangled VR machines. Actual immersion and fidelity!

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:18

1500: Nov 3, 2015; Give me all your crackers

Solarin posted:

Where are the pictures?? I don't have cats but I have 3 acoustic guitars so that will have to count for this thread. Last purchase was a Cordoba C5, really amazingly good value instrument at $300 new. Solid cedar top and feels incredibly light, nice warm mellow sound that makes my terrible playing sound sweeter.

I own one as well, well the Cordoba C7 (Cedar top). Its an amazing guitar for the price (so is the C5, come close to buying one). Mine ended up being 40 after I got it fixed and free from the dumb poo poo that tried to rip me off on ebay.

1500 fucked around with this message at 06:30 on Mar 16, 2016

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:21

Mirificus: Oct 29, 2004; Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/comment/6456709/#Comment_6456709

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:45

ZenMaster: Jan 24, 2006; I Saved PC Gaming

Star Citizen: As Simple As A Five Year Old Would Understand

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:48

TheLastRoboKy: May 2, 2009; Finishing the game with everyone else's continues

Mirificus posted:

https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/comment/6456709/#Comment_6456709

I like how he calls it a "living and breathing universe" as though this poo poo wasn't drowned face down in the water it's doing so little living or breathing.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 06:52

CrazyTolradi: Oct 2, 2011; It feels so good to be so bad.....at posting.

Holy poo poo Dr Derek needs to go into the tunnel bore business.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:07

Sushi in Yiddish: Feb 2, 2008

Got a great new idea for a vehicle in Solar Plebian

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:27

Salt n Reba McEntire: Nov 14, 2000; Kuparp.

I do find a humble firesale on cryengine assets extremely interesting. Especially considering how many Illfonic throw-aways are in there.

Seems almost like this 'game' is starting to destroy everything it touches.

While Chris was being physically thrown out of Microsoft's building, did he grab a copy of their management guidelines or something?

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:28

Blunderstorm: Mar 1, 2016; my grandfather just posts and all i got was this lousy joke, so what

1500 posted:

I own one as well, well the Cordoba C7 (Cedar top). Its an amazing guitar for the price (so is the C5, come close to buying one). Mine ended up being 40 after I got it fixed and free from the dumb poo poo that tried to rip me off on ebay.

What kind of catte is that friend?

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:28

Gravity_Storm: Mar 1, 2016

TheLastRoboKy posted:

I like how he calls it a "living and breathing universe" as though this poo poo wasn't drowned face down in the water it's doing so little living or breathing.

Love the way they talk about SC in the present tense like it's totally got all these amazing features right now.

It's truly a religious experience living in the 'laxy.

Star 'Laxatives

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:34

Goobs: Jan 30, 2016; Doxcat is watching you PU.

Toops posted:

Yeah dude, here's the script.

email me at solarplebeian@gmail.com since you're one of the weirdos who have PM's disabled. This angers me because I have to do the formatting manually each time.

[Pilot] - Gruff and brash, like a mix between Han Solo and Josey Wales.
[Computer] - Posh British butler accent.

(Camera first person: Pilot gingerly enters the ship, grunting and cussing under his breath, sits down at the cockpit, and picks up a clipboard with a many pages of checklists and notes. Starts pressing buttons and pulling levers)

(He pauses, and after a long sigh looks up towards the upper console and presses the �Power� button. Electronics whir as they power up and dashboard lights flicker on, followed by the Windows 95 Startup sound)

[Computer] (chipper) �Good morning, Sir!"
[Pilot] (dismissive, preoccupied) �There are no mornings in space, Computer"
[Computer] (chipper) �Well! Rather a gloomy outlook, wouldn�t you say?"
(no reply, pilot alternates between looking at sheet and pressing buttons)
[Computer] (helpful, optimistic) "Don�t forget to prime the airbags, sir!"
[Pilot] (annoyed) �Every drat time I actuate the airbags something terrible happens. Don�t you remember Andoras?"
[Computer] (a chill runs down his motherboard) �How could I forget..."
(contemplative silence)
[Computer] (trying to recover) �A-anyway, I ran a thorough root cause analysis and could find no correlation whatsoever between airbag actuation and that dreadful bit of business in Andoras. Frankly sir, I think you�re being superstitious."
[Pilot] (flat, dismissive) �Your programming doesn�t account for premonition."
(brief pause)
[Computer] (timid) �Sir the hungry hungry hippos� They�re quite hungry this morning, sir.."
[Pilot] (angry) �Oh CAN IT, will you potato??"
[Computer] (optimistic) �Here, let�s have some music, shall we?"
(Plays �Don�t Stop 'Till You Get Enough� by Michael Jackson)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h6t2n_Tbu3E&t=23s
[Pilot] (very annoyed, raised voice) �Oh, COME ON computer, you�re gonna play that, NOW??"
[Computer] (desperate, raised voice) �Sir, I feel if you could just make it to the chorus..."
[Pilot] (angry, yelling) �CUT THAT poo poo OFF MAN!!!"
(Music still plays)
(Pilot bangs violently on the console, music cuts off)
[Computer] (frenetic) �All right! all right! My word, we have enough problems as it is without you breaking more of my essential circuitry!"
[Pilot] (flat, preoccupied) �Your 80�s pop playlist is not essential, Computer."
[Computer] (under his breath) �If you can't enjoy M.J I wonder which of us is the living one..."
(pause, pilot sighs)
[Pilot] (apologetic) �Sorry compy, I had a rough night."
[Computer] (sad) "It's fine sir, it's fine. I should know better than to bother you with my trifles."
[Pilot] (contrite) *Sigh* "No, come on... How about a ballad?"
[Computer] (excited) �Coming right up, Commando!"
(Plays �Human Nature� by Michael Jackson)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNjqOoHOYPg
[Pilot] (stops for a minute, wistful) �Ahh, man. I love this song"
[Computer] (also wistful) �Me too, sir. Me too."

(Pilot hits the engine on button, ship powers up, zoom out, it shoots unsafely up off the landing pad, nearly missing a Sperg Starliner Cruise ship, and boosts out of frame. Music fades up, roll intro credits)

I'm gonna try my hand at this too.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:55

Goobs: Jan 30, 2016; Doxcat is watching you PU.

Mirificus posted:

https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/comment/6456709/#Comment_6456709

Alan Parpsons knows a little something about game development.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 07:57

WhiskeyWhiskers: Oct 14, 2013; "هذا ليس عادلاً."
"هذا ليس عادلاً على الإطلاق."
"كان هناك وقت الآن."
(السياق الخفي: للقراءة)

Turd Burglar posted:

What kind of catte is that friend?

Clearly a Macat.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:02

smellmycheese: Feb 1, 2016

While Derek's meltdown has been amusing let's not lose sight of the other news in video games. While the Spergwhales continue to stare At their bugged, empty Cryengine shitfest and "pledge" for "concepts" Sony have just announced VR will be available for the PlayStation in September - for �350 - the price of one of these loving idiots JPEGs. I know where I will be going for my immersion

smellmycheese fucked around with this message at 08:18 on Mar 16, 2016

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:06

1500: Nov 3, 2015; Give me all your crackers

Turd Burglar posted:

What kind of catte is that friend?

shamrock macaw

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:09

The Kins: Oct 2, 2004

Warcabbit posted:

I checked out that Cryengine bundle.

So... you know, hey, they're .ma, .mb, .fbx, .max

And some .wavs and .psds

Good stuff, if you're making any games that could use things.

The sounds alone are worth it.

https://twitter.com/cryengine/status/709874255010267136

The actual licenses attached to the "Madison Pike" downloads don't seem to reflect this, though, so who the hell knows.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:11

mike12345: Jul 14, 2008; "Whether the Earth was created in 7 days, or 7 actual eras, I'm not sure we'll ever be able to answer that. It's one of the great mysteries."

smellmycheese posted:

While Derek's meltdown has been amusing let's not lose sight of the other news in video games. While the Spergwhales continue to stare At their bugged, empty Cryengine shitfest and "pledge" for "concepts" Sony have just announced VR will be available for the PlayStation in September - for �350 - the price of one of these loving idiots JPEGs. I know where I will be going for my immersion

Give a man VR, and he'll dream for a day. Give a man a jpg - and he'll dream for a life time.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:27

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Beet Wagon posted:

SmartDad I love you but just shut up and wear your self own with dignity. You're approaching Sarsa levels of retarded, here.

Just for your information uncle Derek, that's 2,500 in the retard-o-meter.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:36

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

https://www.reddit.com/r/DerekSmart/comments/4al48s/you_cant_make_this_up_dr_derek_smart_phd/

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:44

alf_pogs: Feb 15, 2012

reading about these gently caress shits talkin about SA on other forums is my favourite thing

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:48

Booourns: Jan 20, 2004; Please send a report when you see me complain about other posters and threads outside of QCS

~thanks!

You guys remember you're talking to derek smart, right?

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:49

Runa: Feb 13, 2011

My favorite filtered word is still xbone.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:49

Chocobo: Oct 15, 2012; Here comes a new challenger!; Oven Wrangler

Reddit and SA are basically the same thing, except one of them bans pedophiles and the other literally hides unpopular opinions from view.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:50

Thoatse: Feb 29, 2016; Lol said the scorpion, lmao

Sushi in Yiddish posted:

Got a great new idea for a vehicle in Solar Plebian

The Smart Mole, nice find

Fastest digger in the west

Goes back for seconds

# ? Mar 16, 2016 08:56

ComfyPants: Mar 20, 2002

Obviously the most evil and threatening force that could bring down their precious space game doesn't allow its members to use naughty words.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 09:03

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 06:53

SomethingJones: Mar 6, 2016; <3

Wafflz posted:

The first rule of holes is to know when to stop digging.

Just wanted to put that out there.

If you keep digging long enough, you'll eventually come full circle and meet a version of your self that didn't gently caress up. It's called a reverse hole.

# ? Mar 16, 2016 09:57

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

«‹›6665 »