|
Hooray! Bad Munki did something! The team actually functioned as it was meant to this time! Lovely work, lads.
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 02:32
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 03:21 |
|
|
Less you functioned as intended and more. Face continues to function as his namesake.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 04:28
|
|
|
Godna posted:Less you functioned as intended and more. Face continues to function as his namesake. Hey now, Bad Munki crippled two gladiators and impeded a third. That's definitely as intended whatever Face is called.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 04:37
|
|
|
AJ_Impy posted:Hey now, Bad Munki crippled two gladiators and impeded a third. That's definitely as intended whatever Face is called. I'm just joking about how bad Face has perfromed in general. It was meant to be a face tank but is in fact much more of a troll face to his team :/
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 06:24
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:There is no betting favorite in this match, as exactly 1323.00 dwarfbucks were bet on each side! It's always nice when a fellow programmer notices these things. 
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 09:30
|
|
|
Jazzimus Prime posted:It's always nice when a fellow programmer notices these things. ...and like any real programming / development job there's always something else to do. So get to work on those anonymized equipment / skill breakdowns.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 16:14
|
|
|
 Round 12, Fight 5 Lightly Whipped is on the left side of the arena. Ghost-trees (jon joe) is a male molemarian. He wields a copper flail and a wooden buckler and wears a copper mail shirt. Trump's Viscous Discharge (goatface) is a female minotaur. She is empty handed and wears a bronze helm and a bronze mail shirt. Grimmik (FillInTheBlank) is a male gremlin. He wields an iron whip and wears a steel helm. Jupis Tooki McGannel (GreyPowerVan) is a male strangler. He wields a copper crossbow and a wooden shield and wears a copper helm and a copper mail shirt. A Tarantino Film is on the right side of the arena. Uma Thurman (I R SMART LIKE ROCK) is a female human. She wields a steel two-handed sword and wears an iron helm and leather armor. Urist McLee (Fuubi) is a male dwarf. He is empty handed and wears a copper helm. Snarls Barkley (Bene Elim) is a female werewolf. She wields a bronze pike and a wooden shield and wears a bronze helm, leather armor, a bronze mail shirt, bronze gauntlets, and bronze high boots. Solomon Rabinowitz (Added Space) is a male serpent man. He is empty handed and wears a steel helm, a steel mail shirt, steel gauntlets, and steel high boots.  A Tarantino Film is a 2.90 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 2800.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 965.00 dwarfbucks for Lightly Whipped.  The lineup. I love it when there is only one of each species. So much easier to run the fight and keep things straight.  First blood is almost instant with Uma Thurman swinging her sword and cleaving Ghost-Trees back foot in two.  Then the fighters get into it for real. Trump gores Uma and only bruises bone through armor, then Grimmik lashes her hand so hard that bone fractures. And now backup arrives for Uma. Snarls leads the way and chops Trumps foot open, but Trump is fixated on Uma and gores her right arm so hard it's unrecognizable after. Uma swings her two handed sword one-handed and chops Trumps other foot which sends the minotaur to the floor. Uma Thurman_TAR: I was attacked. You will know my ferocity!  Grimmik breaks Snarls' right arm with his whip. Trump gets bit by the snakeman but his armor holds the deadly venom away. Trump launches Uma into the air by her finger. Solomon releases his grip and then bites his hand a moment later. Trump is paralyzed. Uma lands with a bone-jarring thump. Meanwhile up top: Urist charges the large moleman and knocks him over backwards, stunned. Urist punches and GhostTrees' hand collapses and the copper flail falls to the floor.  GhostTrees bites Uma's thigh, tearing muscle and sending the human into unconsciousness. Solomon leans over and bites the stunned GhostTrees, and the moleman collapses as venom courses through his veins. Jupis has done exactly what he needs to do to live: Nothing. Just fuckin hide, dude. Grimmik is trying to deliver a blow that does something, he's broken two bones so far but not enough damage to knock someone unconscious.  Snarls hacks a few times and Trump's head falls off. Jupis begins bashing Uma's helmeted head with his crossbow, desperate for a kill.  GhostTrees overcomes the paralysis which is amazing. All 3 gladiators attack Uma. Jupis bashes her guts, Grimmik breaks her ribs, and GhostTrees bites her and shakes her around. The thing about that is Snarls is right fuckin there and he stabs GhostTrees a few times until he dies while Solomon shakes and shakes the huge moleman.  GO JUPIS GO! EVERYONE IS ATTACKING GRIMMIK. YOU CAN DO THIS BUDDY GO GO GO. Grimmik tries to dodge, but Snarls spills his guts around his legs so it's really hard to move. Solomon bites him and paralyzes him.  YOU ARE ALL ALONE JUPIS! SMASH HER loving HEAD IN! The combat log shows: Snarls Barkley_TAR stabs Grimmik_WHIP in the lower body with her {bronze pike}, tearing apart the muscle! An artery has been opened by the attack! Urist McLee_TAR grabs Grimmik_WHIP by the fourth toe, left foot with his left hand! Grimmik_WHIP has fully overcome the paralysis. Urist McLee_TAR releases the grip of Urist McLee_TAR's left hand on Grimmik_WHIP's fourth toe, left foot. Grimmik_WHIP has bled to death. The game shows that Urist McLee gets the kill despite Snarls Barkley doing 99.99% of the work. Nice kill stealing!  Jupis is bowled over by the charge of the three gladiators and soon Solomon gets his 4th paralyzing attack for a perfect fight.  Snarls gets the kill. A Tarantino Film lives up to the betting hype with a flawless 4-0 victory. Kills: Snarls Barkley: 3 Urist McLee: 1 Combat Log
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 16:27
|
|
|
I'm actually starting to feel kind of bad for Lightly Whipped.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 16:45
|
|
|
Ablative posted:I'm actually starting to feel kind of bad for Lightly Whipped.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 16:50
|
|
|
Lightly Whipped may not be racking up wins, but if it's any consolation, they're an excellent data point as far as arguing balance and testing things.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 17:01
|
|
|
I'm just disappointed that so many people took it seriously.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 17:08
|
|
|
Snarls Barkley has the single highest proportion of their team's kills in the tournament, with 64% of Tarantino Film's total. TF are still last in their division, but uniquely amongst the bottom feeders, they have clawed their way up to look 3rd place in the eye. Indeed, they're now just one win shy of that cluster battling for the last playoff spots. Can a team be considered as worthless as the unblooded it harbors? They don't even have double digit kills. Their kill difference is so terrible that you would have to add the Gemclod and Boatmurdered division leaders together to counterbalance it. The other team with Unblooded has two gladiators with mediocre but respectable kill counts. Both of them have more kills individually than the full total of the team that deserves no name.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 20:28
|
|
|
Round 12, Fight 1 A furry, a farmer, and two cows is on the left side of the arena. Goku (Galick) is a male tigerman. He wields a wooden buckler and wears a leather cap, leather armor, a copper mail shirt, leather leggings, leather gauntlets, and leather high boots. Dontellim Pike (John Charity Spring) is a male human. He wields an iron pike and wears an iron helm, leather armor, an iron mail shirt, leather leggings, leather gauntlets, and leather high boots. Min/Maxotaur (Anchors) is a female minotaur. She wields a copper large dagger and a wooden buckler and wears a copper helm, two copper mail shirts, a copper breast plate, copper greaves, copper gauntlets, and copper high boots. Rob Ford (Tirius) is a male minotaur. He wields an iron two-handed sword and a wooden shield and wears a copper helm, an iron mail shirt, leather leggings, copper gauntlets, and leather high boots. This Bites is on the right side of the arena. Knife Toseeu (synthorange) is a female strangler. She wields a copper large dagger and wears no armor. Sun Tzulander the Philomodel (Keru) is a male elf. He is empty handed and wears a leather cap and platinum low boots. Roland Gorchnik (Maarak) is a male human. He wields a copper scourge and wears an iron cap, leather armor, leather gauntlets, and leather low boots. Eyeteeth IV (Revenant Threshold) is a male werewolf. He wields a copper shield and wears an iron helm, leather armor, an iron mail shirt, iron greaves, and copper high boots.  This Bites is a 1.13 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 1521.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 1344.00 dwarfbucks for A furry, a farmer, and two cows.  The lineup.  First blood is fourfold. Sun Tzulander does an impressive jumpkick and Min/Max's teeth fly into the air. Knife Toseeu stabs Dontellim in the arm. Roland lashes Rob Ford in the arm, fracturing bone. Dontellim Pike waits till the elf lands, then stabs Sun Tzu in the chest with his pike. Ribs and a lung are shattered. Sun Tzu passes out. Bravo, Sun Tzu. Jupis lasted longer than you.  In the next heartbeat of combat Knife Toseeu stabs Goku in the foot (paw) and Goku falls to the floor. Roland Gorchnik breaks Rob Fords leg with his scourge. Another slash from Knife Toseeu and Goku passes out.  It's now 3v3, folks! Up top Dontellim tries to help Goku by attacking Knife Toseeu from behind. Down south there is a 2v1 and Rob Ford already has 2 broken bones.  Min/Max finishes off Sun Tzu and charges north to save Goku.  Knife Toseeu is too quick for that though. With two quick slashes Dontellim's leg is cut from under him, and then cut to the bone. Dontellim is enraged. He's also unconscious.  Min/Max chases Knife Toseeu away before he can get a kill for his team. The minotaur stabs Knife Toseeu in one of his 4 arms, and then charges the smaller strangler.  Rob Ford abandons the 2v1 he was forced into which leaves Roland and Eyeteeth alone with 2 unconscious opponents. Min/Max takes off Knife Toseeu's head. Min/Max again is forced to charge toward his downed teammates to save their lives.  That huge minotaur is like a god drat terrifying freight train. Just get the gently caress out of the way. Roland gets a solid lash in to break his arm, but is soon bowled over backwards while Eyeteeth vainly tries to kill an unconscious Dontellim. Rob Ford limps onto the scene and thrusts his huge sword into Roland and the human passes out from pain.  Rob Ford takes his head a moment later. Now it's the weaponless Eyeteeth against one uninjured fighter and Rob Ford who has proven he is still deadly with that sword despite his injuries. Min/Max takes another breath and charges north to save his unconscious teammates. Again. So I had this great gif showing a bunch of poo poo but it went green when I opened it up. I did not take any screenshots. http://i.imgur.com/yL0H5n9.gif Here it is, but it's seriously green and useless. Sorry. I started gif'ing after I saw what was going on. What I was gif'ing is Eyeteeth dodging around and around and around and around. He took zero injuries while bruising Min/Max pretty good. He ran and ran and ran; Rob Ford could not keep up so it was just a 1v1. It's really too bad Eyeteeth doesn't have a weapon. Shields are not enough.  Eyeteeth ran maybe 20 tiles which is a lot in the tournament. He ended up here and stopped moving. I didn't see blood spurt so I took a closer look.  Oh. That's how far he ran and how much poo poo he did. He over exerted himself trying to stay alive and damage Min/Max. Min/Max is Over-Exerted, so he would have passed out in another few seconds I think.  Rob Ford takes his head. A Furry, a Farmer, and two cows wins with a (barely) 4-0 victory. I didn't even get to make a "Rob Ford died like his namesake" joke.  Kills: Rob Ford: 2 Min/Max: 2 Combat Log Spermy Smurf fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Mar 22, 2016 |
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 20:35
|
|
|
Random betting works.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 20:41
|
|
|
Just fixed 2 images. God drat new computer. Everything is the exact same but it just feels different.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 20:45
|
|
|
ZeeToo posted:Lightly Whipped may not be racking up wins, but if it's any consolation, they're an excellent data point as far as arguing balance and testing things. I will continue to fervently bet all of my money on severe underdogs. It's a sure thing! Spermy Smurf posted:God drat new computer. Everything is the exact same but it just feels different. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkWFvbTRAGI
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:03
|
|
|
I think that the only other piece of information I'd really want to have at the start of fight posts would be the respective records of the two teams. The betting differential can get really warped by the big spenders picking a side. It seems like their fight records would give you another maybe more accurate metric for seeing who the underdog is.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:09
|
|
|
How about I just link the site before the match and you can all look it up before you start reading. How about that, jerkfaces? Kidding. That's a good idea. Also maybe on the betting screen since I don't know what team is what and I just randomly bet on a team only to find out they are 1-12 with 4 kills the entire tournament.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:12
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:How about I just link the site before the match and you can all look it up before you start reading. Making bets and having to check back and forth was actually what made me think of it!
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:14
|
|
|
So we need to make a wishlist. 1) Mystery Boxes 2) Mystery Boxes 3) Mystery Boxes . . . . 4010) Mystery Boxes 4011) Win/Loss records displayed somewhere. 4012) Mystery Boxes 4013) Mystery Boxes Am I missing anything?
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:20
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:So we need to make a wishlist. Gold crowns for champion alumni.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:22
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:So we need to make a wishlist. If you could put in an adamantine dagger for Mr. Kyanka down there at 4014 that'd be great. Tunicate posted:Gold crowns for champion alumni. The crowns should make it impossible to wear any other sort of headgear as well. I think that's an important balancing point for the "skill" factor.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:23
|
|
|
Fun fact: I was doing an audit of my spreadsheet whilst that report was being written, comparing it against the kill totals on the arena challenge site, and couldn't locate the 4-kill discrepancy for Furry, Farmer and 2 cows. I commend Spermy Smurf for running the matches faster than I can account for! Anyway. Those four kills take FF2C ahead of This Bites on kills, though every member of the former has less kills than the non-unblooded members of the latter. As an aside, I composed my spreadsheet in order of kills recorded: Unblooded teams didn't get an entry until they earned one. Those two teams were the last two to do so.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:24
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:Uma Thurman_TAR: I was attacked. You will know my ferocity! I knew filling you up with booze ahead of time would be the ticket to not dying, Spermy Smurf posted:Jupis begins bashing Uma's helmeted head with his crossbow, desperate for a kill. ...or maybe it's that helmets really do make a difference.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 21:26
|
|
|
Forgive a relative newbie to Dwarf murders, but what are the mystery boxes?
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 22:36
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:So we need to make a wishlist. The ability to make legal 'test' gladiator macros. fallingdownjoe posted:Forgive a relative newbie to Dwarf murders, but what are the mystery boxes? I've been here since these things started and I never got this one. 
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 22:58
|
|
|
fallingdownjoe posted:Forgive a relative newbie to Dwarf murders, but what are the mystery boxes? I mean, telling would sort of spoil the mystery, don't you think? Then it'd just be a box.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:08
|
|
|
Bad Munki posted:I mean, telling would sort of spoil the mystery, don't you think? Then it'd just be a box. I'm excited for them already!
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:16
|
|
|
Mystery boxes would be cool and all, but can we get mystery boxes, too? I think mystery boxes are better than mystery boxes, but I don't see why we can't have both.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:24
|
|
|
When the Slade Gauntlets received a mystery crate, it was a crate of slade gauntlets. You don't want to get mystery crates.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:25
|
|
|
my dad posted:When the Slade Gauntlets received a mystery crate, it was a crate of slade gauntlets. You don't want to get mystery crates. Who the heck said anything about mystery crates? We're talking about mystery boxes. Totally different.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:28
|
|
|
jon joe posted:Totally different. More mysterious, too.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:45
|
|
|
Bad Munki posted:More mysterious, too. And boxier.
|
|
#
?
Mar 22, 2016 23:57
|
|
|
I was pretty drunk one day and chatting with Jazz and the Commish group. We got talking about creating our own tournaments, and my drunken idea was Mystery Boxes. Use your dorfbux from betting to buy a mystery box to drop into your (or any) fight. The commish running the fight would roll 1d8 via some trackable site, and the roll would correspond to something. That something would be anything from one more skill level to you, one less skill level to an opponent, a random yeti thrown in the ring on an independent team, weapon upgrade or randomly assigned weapon... or some other drunk ideas. Someone else had an even better idea for a crazy tournament but I was half-mast for mystery boxes and forgot their idea by morning.
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 00:13
|
|
|
Spermy Smurf posted:The game shows that Urist McLee gets the kill despite Snarls Barkley doing 99.99% of the work. Nice kill stealing! Three for three on kill stealing! I couldn't be more proud! 
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 00:13
|
|
|
This isnt gonna be TF2 where youll give out mystery boxes then we have to pay to open them, is it?
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 00:32
|
|
my dad posted:When the Slade Gauntlets received a mystery crate, it was a crate of slade gauntlets. You don't want to get mystery crates. The Mystery Box the Plump Helmets got at the start had Panty inside.
|
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 00:33
|
|
|
Ramc posted:The Mystery Box the Plump Helmets got at the start had Panty inside. Which was promptly stolen.
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 00:34
|
|
|
Sun Tzulander may be more useless than a dead hedgehog, but at least he's got some nice kicks.
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 03:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 03:21 |
|
|
Keru posted:Nameless Unblooded may be more useless than a dead hedgehog, but at least he's got some nice kicks. I refuse to acknowledge any virtue or value until it kills someone. 
|
|
#
?
Mar 23, 2016 03:26
|
|