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Street Cop: Got ourselves another body? Chief: Yup, third one this week. Street Cop: OD? Chief: Bad strain of Molly. It never ends. Street Cop: There must be something we can do. Chief: None of our men can last long enough undercover to get any evidence. Street Cop: Seriously? Chief: Do you want to do it? Street Cop: gently caress, no. EDM gives me such a headache. Chief: We only have one choice then. *picks up techno-phone* It's time. America needs you, Techno Cop Techno Cop: Screeeeeeeee womp wompwompwomp *airhorn noise* Chief: God help us all... |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:33 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 13:31 |
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Chief: If this bass drops, NYC is doomed. Techno Cop: Oppa gangnam style Chief: Stop Techno Cop: Op Op Op Chief: I need you to be serious Techno Cop: Op Op Oppa gangnam style Chief: We have like 10 seconds till the bomb goes off Techno Cop: Ayyyyyyyyy sexy lady |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:36 |
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techno cop: you have the right to remain peaceful. anyhting you do or say will be loved unconditionally. you have the right to unity, if you do not have unity, it will be assigned to you via this kandy. do you understand these rights and the respect im giving you? |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:49 |
citizen: do you regret choosing the name techno cop over edm cop as the industry has evolved? techno cop: well citizen, a funny thing about regret is that it's better to regret something you have done than to regret something you haven't done. and by the way, if you see your mom this weekend, would you be sure and tell her SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN SATAN
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:50 |
citizen: techno cop, why are you licking my window? techno cop: are you serious?
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:51 |
regular cop: good job on the drug bust, techno cop. if the air filters hadn't tested positive for black mold, we never would have discovered their grow operations. how did you think to check the filtration units? techno cop: you could say i'm something of an expert when it comes to infected mushrooms
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:53 |
chief of police: only two months on the force and already twenty seven arrests. johnson down in CSI says you're the prodigy of the department. the crystal method you employed to trace that meth back to the cook was pure brilliance. with your help we'll pry this zombie nation away from it's dangerous substance abuse problems and pave the way for cities of the future. techno cop: i love my job
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 05:58 |
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the chief: now see here, techno cop. after you bungled that arson case by accusing, for no reason i can discern, everyone in eyeshot of being twisted firestarters, i have to assign you a partner. techno cop: i don't need a new partner, chief! this techno cop is a solo act! techno cop's new partner: do you think you're better off alone. do you think you're better off alone techno cop (thinking): drat it...this guy can read me like a book... |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:16 |
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techno cop's new partner, electro cop, may constantly grate on techno cop's nerves, but it's only by working together and finding their strength that they'll be able to stop the deadmau5 killer from claiming another victim and marking them with his gruesome "encased in giant cartoon mouse head" calling card. a rave is involved. runtime 90 minutes |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:22 |
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chief: techno cop you're a loose cannon, or, I guess, synthesizer or something? I am having a hard time following your wacky gimmick techno cop but you're a drat good cop |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:40 |
techno cop's nonstandard uniform includes a dr. seuss neon tophat and tripp pants
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 06:48 |
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joke_explainer posted:chief: techno cop you're a loose cannon, or, I guess, synthesizer or something? I am having a hard time following your wacky gimmick techno cop but you're a drat good cop a loose bass cannon |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 07:07 |
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*techno cop driving on the autobahn* |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 16:16 |
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techno cop is on the beat
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 16:17 |
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i flunked out posted:techno cop: you have the right to remain peaceful. anyhting you do or say will be loved unconditionally. you have the right to unity, if you do not have unity, it will be assigned to you via this kandy. do you understand these rights and the respect im giving you? |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 16:43 |
they dropped his insurance, now he'll drop the bass
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 16:51 |
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bacalou posted:techno cop's nonstandard uniform includes a dr. seuss neon tophat and tripp pants treasure bear posted:techno cop is on the beat |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 17:15 |
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criminal: "come any closer and i'll shoot the hostages!" technocop approaches with whirling glow sticks: "cats and boots and cats and boots and cats and boots and" criminal goes into trance like state: "whoa..."
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 18:00 |
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techno cop is in critical but stable condition after an accidentally bringing his gun to a knife party |
# ? Mar 27, 2016 21:42 |
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okay kids, just say tech-no to drugs
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# ? Mar 27, 2016 22:37 |
i flunked out posted:techno cop: you have the right to remain peaceful. anyhting you do or say will be loved unconditionally. you have the right to unity, if you do not have unity, it will be assigned to you via this kandy. do you understand these rights and the respect im giving you? ---------------- |
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# ? Mar 28, 2016 00:15 |
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Chief: You're the only one with the skills to handle this crowd. Techno Cop: *twiddles some knobs and walks away* |
# ? Mar 28, 2016 00:43 |
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This thread is better than the videogame https://youtu.be/Vii2mU4Edhc https://youtu.be/6zGr-SF-gM0 |
# ? Mar 28, 2016 02:24 |
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galahan posted:This thread is better than the videogame holy poo poo |
# ? Mar 28, 2016 03:04 |
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I'm blue and red and blue and red and blue and red and blue and red and blue abba dee abba dai |
# ? Mar 28, 2016 04:07 |
technocop pointing his gun: FOUR ON THE FLOOR suspect: w-what? technocop sweating: i mean ON THE GROUND
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# ? Mar 28, 2016 19:13 |
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# ? May 30, 2024 13:31 |
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techno cop: just put the gun down, man! bank robber: YOU COPPERS GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW! techno cop: we can't do that, man! put the gun down and we'll talk! bank robber: YOU PUT YOUR poo poo DOWN OR THE GUARD GETS IT! techno cop: YOU PUT DOWN YOUR GUN RIGHT NOW OR I'LL DROP YOU! bank robber: I'M GONNA DROP HIM techno cop: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA bank robber: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *everyone starts firing* SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!SHOTS!SHO-SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!SHOTS!SHO-SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!SHOTS!SHO-SHOTS! techno cop: *looks at the camera* ERRY-BAH-DEE
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# ? Mar 29, 2016 04:55 |