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Plucky Brit posted:I agree. I whole heartedly endorse this sentiment. This man has managed to look like a bigger oval office than Dylan Hartley. That is next level cuntery. And he's a poo poo prop.
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Mar 24, 2016 17:33
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is there a definitive list of "biggest oval office" for each of the 6 nations, even if you went back and included any player that played for the national team in the last five years?
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Mar 24, 2016 22:23
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hitchensgoespop posted:is there a definitive list of "biggest oval office" for each of the 6 nations, even if you went back and included any player that played for the national team in the last five years? Not sure who it could be currently for Wales, Liam Williams I guess? Mike Philips is out of the squad, but I guess would be the best choice for the last 5 years. When was Henson's last appearance? 2010 or 2011?
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Mar 25, 2016 15:21
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Did we ever finish making that oval office XV we tried to assemble in one of the old threads? I remember it being pretty funny
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Mar 25, 2016 17:15
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I don't think it would be fair to France to reduce their cuntiest players down to just the one. Who was the chap who broke Heaslip's back last year? Pepe? He'd have to be in with a good shout for the position.
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Mar 25, 2016 21:43
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World Dickhead XV, off the top of my head 1. Joe Marler 2. Dylan Hartley (though he's been good in 2016) 3. Tomas Francis I guess? Sure there's someone better 4. Pascal Pape 5. Is Justin Harrison still playing? 6. Tom Wood 7. Steffon Armitage for loving off to France when we needed him 8. Probably some Frenchman 9. Mike Phillips 10. Danny Cipriani (seriously the most talented rugby player England has ever seen) 11. Liam Williams 12. Manu Tuilagi 13. Mathieu Bastareaud 14. Chris Ashton 15. James O'Connor Actually a pretty strong XV on the field...
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Mar 28, 2016 11:50
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8 has to be Parisse, because he's every other role on the pitch so why not this one?
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Mar 28, 2016 14:49
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World Rugby has decided that the 6 nations disciplinary panel can gtfo and they want to have words with Marler.
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Mar 28, 2016 20:29
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bigfoot again posted:World Dickhead XV, off the top of my head Half back should be Nic White.
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Mar 28, 2016 21:03
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MyChemicalImbalance posted:Did we ever finish making that oval office XV we tried to assemble in one of the old threads? I remember it being pretty funny I compiled the list, and started the write-up, but then ended up in hospital and never got around to finishing it. At some point, Cyberpingu pointed out that the original concept was actually to make the 'World Moron 15', because the 'All-Star Team Of 15 Cunts' list could just be an average Harlequins team. I found an old copy of the Word file, but I can't be bothered finishing it, or remembering what some of these guys did. World Moron XV 15. David Campese 14. Liam Williams 13. Manu Tuilagi 12. Gavin Henson 11. Julian Savea 10. Rhys Priestland 09. Drunk Danny Care 01. Dean Greyling 02. Dylan Hartley 03. Salsi Ma'Afu 04. Jamie Cudmore 05. Ian Evans 06. Andy Powell 07. Mauro Bergamasco 08. Dean Richards - 04. Justin Harrison (Brumbies / Australia) Remember Matt Stevens? Remember how we learnt that taking cocaine is both cool and funny? Justin Harrison definitely remembers Matt Stevens, because as acting MC on the team coach, Justin Harrison made some hilarious jokes about the situation - “Class A? It's ok, everyone's doing it!” joked Justin Harrison. Co-incidently it turns out that Jusin Harrison may also enjoy doing a shitload of coccain and beating people up other players at nightclubs. The next day, Justin was shocked to learn that after several team-mates (and junior academy) members objected to his joke (and beatings-up of other players at nightclubS), the team had scheduled him in for a drugs test. Jusin Harrison mysteriously retired from playing rugby the next morning. He's also a racist, which makes him even bigger and cooler and more successful than this story already makes him sound. - 05. Ian Evans (Bristol / Wales) Evans had a great year in 2013, cementing his place in the Wales team, earning a touring spot in the British Lions team, signing a lucrative contract with Toulon and then capping it off by stamping repeatedly on Mike McCarthy's face. While McCarthy's head was being sewn back together, his team went on to win by 33 points, while Evans pleaded guilty to a 12 week ban. Evans' ban lasted until the end of the season, the ENTIRE Six Nations, and into the start of the next season. With Evans banned from playing, Toulon opted out of his contract, leaving Evans to sign for Bristol, in England's second division. He hasn't played international rugby since. - 06. Andy Powell (Dragons / Wales) [Captain] In the 2010 Six Nations, Wales beat Scotland 31-24, in what could easily be the most exciting rugby match in the tournament's history. The ending of the game was so dramatic, it was played repeatedly on local news reports across Wales, and dominated the headlines so much that little else even made the news that night. Until 6am the next day, when news reports came in of traffic alerts on the Welsh motorway, as police were chasing a man who was reportedly blind drunk, had stolen a golf cart, and was driving it backwards up the motorway at 10mph. As the news channels gathered more and more information on the incident, it became increasingly obvious that it was Wales captain Andy Powell. When Powell was finally arrested (after a 4 mile chase) he explained that he was “very hungry”, and had stolen the golf cart because he needed to buy some snacks. Powell never played for Wales again. - 07. Mauro Bergamasco (Zebre / Italy) If you played sports at school, then you'll no doubt that met that one kid who thinks he's hot poo poo at playing his favoured position, and considers himself such a hot property that he can actually play in ANY position, and still kick everyone's rear end, even though he isn't suited to playing that position, and has received absolutely no training. Mauro Bergamasco was this kid. He was this kid in a Six Nations game against England, and it didn't go very well. Witness the videographed delights of Mauro Bergamasco starting a game at scrum-half. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_chgIKTgyDs - 08. Dean Richards (England / Harlequins) The Calcutta Cup is one of the oldest and most beautiful trophies in sport. In 1872, a group of English and Scottish ex-patriots in the city of Calcutta celebrated Christmas Day by holding an exhibition rugby match between their two countries. Their passion and patriotism kicked off a brief popularity for the sport in Calcutta, who even formed their own local team, with the hopes of playing regular matches in the unbearable heat. After realising this was a stupid idea, the team disbanded, and the club's coffers were melted down into an elaborate cup. The city of Calcutta donated the cup to the English and Scottish rugby unions, so that each year, the two teams could forever replay the exhibition match that inspired their city to fall in love with rugby. It's a cup with an awesome shitory. .. Anyway, in 1988, Dean Richards got really drunk, and destroyed the Calcutta Cup. There are various stories about how the cup was actually damaged (depending on who's telling the story), but they all involve Richards getting smashed off his face on whisky, and escaping the team hotel to take the trophy on a drunken tour of the city of Edinburgh with members of the opposing team. Richards, a serving police officer at the time, admitted using the trophy as a football, and kicking it around the streets of Edinburgh. He received a one match ban from the RFU, after the matter was dismissed as the result of 'alcohol and hi-jinks'. As the trophy was damaged beyond repair, it now sits in a museum, and a replica is awarded to the winning team of the annual Six Nations fixture. After retiring as a player, Richards then went on to EVEN GREATER CUNTERY as a coach, and received a worldwide ban for orchestrating "Bloodgate" : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uhh2ZS-kT0 - 09. Drunk Danny Care (England / Harlequins) Danny Care loves to drink. And to drive. And to send text messages. He likes sending text messages while driving, and he often drives while he's drunk. At the height of his meteoric rise to English Rugby stardom, Danny Care sent out an inspiring tweet to his supporters : 2012 is hopefully going to be a massive year... Earn respect. Earn the shirt. Set the example.' Minutes after sending the tweet, Danny Care was arrested for drink driving. He was then arrested so many times in the space of a year, that it's actually hard for me to research. - 12. Gavin Henson (Bath / Wales) In 2009, Henson carried Wales to a second Grand Slam, and took the first step on his illustrious journey from “Rugby Player” to “Celebrity oval office”. Henson seemed a good fit for the front page of every tabloid, and was briefly mentored by team-mate and golf buggy enthusiast Andy Powell, as both were arrested for an assault, half-way through the Six Nations tournament. Following the tournament, the squad returned to train with their respective teams, where Henson picked up a leg injury. He was set to return to action for The Ospreys in September, but was notably absent from training. Henson's club and team-mates tried to contact Henson, and were initially worried, until he showed up as a contestant on reality TV Show '71 Degrees North' (which was essentially Celebrity Survivor set on a mountain). Henson finished the show as runner-up to an actor from a soap opera, but was well on his way to oval office stardom. Instead of returning to training, Henson immediately (and I mean literally the next week) became a contestant on Strictly Come Dancing (a reality TV show where celebrities learn to tango). Despite still being under contract to an increasingly bewildered Ospreys team, Henson was constantly referred to on the show as a Rugby League player. Gavin danced his little heart out until the final week of the show, where he lost out to an actor from a soap opera. After 18 months of not showing up to a single game, Henson was photographed training with English club Saracens. The Ospreys finally decided to fire Henson, who MYSTERIOUSLY signed for Saracens the next week. After starting one game for Saracens, Henson became vocal about the fact that his talents were being underutilised and suggested he should be the first choice Fly-Half for the team. Henson was released from his contract within 2 months of singing. One day after being released from The Saracens, Henson used a loop-hole to sign mid-season to french club Toulon. There, Henson struggled for a place on the team with Johnny Wilkinson, who was clearly the best Fly-Half in the world at the time. Henson addressed this issue by starting a fight with Wilkinson in a nightclub, and then having a second fight with the team's captain, when he tried to restore order. Henson was fired from Toulon after playing his third game. Once again free from the shackles of employment, Henson signed with Cardiff Blues, making them his third team in one season. Henson capped off his spectacular season by splitting up with his celebrity girlfriend, and debuting a new reality gameshow called The Bachelor, in which the prize was Gavin Henson's hand in marriage. I can't make this poo poo up. After another summer of tabloid headlines, 2012 was the year Gavin finally settled down with Cardiff Blues. In his longest stint yet, Gavin managed to play a whopping eight games before getting drunk on an airplane, and starting fights with his teammates. Henson was banned from flying, and fired the next week. Henson went back to England, and signed with London Welsh, playing 9 games before amicably (!) leaving to join Bath. On his second week in Bath, Henson got drunk and started a fight with his team-mates. This time was the best one, though, because there's security camera footage of Henson being knocked out by a single punch https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vXzzSa6HFmU Tyma fucked around with this message at 22:01 on Mar 28, 2016 |
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Mar 28, 2016 21:54
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Why is Priestland on that list? He may be a stranger to decent performances but unless I've missed something I would say he's a oval office.
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Mar 28, 2016 22:00
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hitchensgoespop posted:Why is Priestland on that list? He may be a stranger to decent performances but unless I've missed something I would say he's a oval office. It was originally pitched as the 'World Moron XV', but I think it just gets remembered as being the 'oval office XV' because we spent 5 pages arguing over whether Ronan O'Gara was a bigger oval office than Rhys Priestland was an idiot.
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Mar 28, 2016 22:06
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Tyma posted:It was originally pitched as the 'World Moron XV', but I think it just gets remembered as being the 'oval office XV' because we spent 5 pages arguing over whether Ronan O'Gara was a bigger oval office than Rhys Priestland was an idiot. If it's a World Moron XV, Phil Godman is nailed on as the fly-half.
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Mar 28, 2016 22:09
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The Rabbi T. White posted:Half back should be Nic White. Why? Is he more of a oval office than any other scrumhalf? I mean Aaron Smith is extremely annoying if you're not a Kiwi/Highlander but I wouldn't say he's a oval office.
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Mar 28, 2016 22:48
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Unimpressed posted:Why? Is he more of a oval office than any other scrumhalf? I mean Aaron Smith is extremely annoying if you're not a Kiwi/Highlander but I wouldn't say he's a oval office. Aaron Smith is loud and annoying, but is good natured. Nic White is also loud and annoying, but also overly aggressive and seems to try and pick fights with dudes twice his size, then has a cry when things don't go his way. Maybe I just played rugby with one too many people like that in high school and it has soured me on that sort of behaviour.
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Mar 28, 2016 23:18
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The Rabbi T. White posted:Nic White is also loud and annoying, but also overly aggressive and seems to try and pick fights with dudes twice his size, then has a cry when things don't go his way. Maybe I just played rugby with one too many people like that in high school and it has soured me on that sort of behaviour. So, a run-of-the-mill Australian, then? Re: the team, I'd swap Priestland for Owen Farrell.
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Mar 29, 2016 01:18
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Plucky Brit posted:If it's a World Moron XV, Phil Godman is nailed on as the fly-half. Phil "Fucksake" Godman. In the 2010 6 Nations match between Scotland and Wales, as Godman was subbed on I sent a text to my Welsh friend saying "Welp, Godman's on, you've won." And then Phil managed to get himself carded within 2 minutes for tripping Lee Byrne and helped gently caress Scotland out of a win over Wales. Scott Lawson and poo poo game management helped too but really, gently caress Phil Godman.
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Mar 29, 2016 04:18
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Cuthbert throwing a total strangers phone down the street earlier this year would mark him as a pretty big oval office.
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Mar 29, 2016 09:36
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Is this a historical oval office XI or do they have to be current players?
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Mar 29, 2016 10:11
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CyberPingu posted:Is this a historical oval office XI or do they have to be current players? I think there has to be a point of reference, maybe capped in the last 12-15 months. Maybe we need two lists, "Current Cunts" and "All time arseholes XV"
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Mar 29, 2016 10:29
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hitchensgoespop posted:
Jurassic Cunts?
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Mar 29, 2016 10:30
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CyberPingu posted:Jurassic Cunts?
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Mar 29, 2016 10:47
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"ProRugby.org posted:ABOUT THE LEAGUE The teams:
Ohio Sacramento San Diego San Francisco Notable Players:
Pedrie Wannenburg to Denver Jamie Mackintosh to play for Ohio Filippo Ferrarini to play for Ohio Mirco Bergamasco will be playing for Sacramento Josh Inong to play for Sacramento (who? story) Phil Mackenzie, proudly signing with San Diego Mils Muliaina who will play for San Francisco Orene Ai’i, to play for San Francisco So that's a total of 8 guys that anyone's ever heard of, who's going to fill the rest of 5 teams? Well... They held combines and stole the best players from the club system that would sign. See, PRO Rugby’s contracts are broken into tiers. Tier 1 domestic players make $35,000 a year, and Tier 2 players make $20,000. Tier 3 players are paid only for games in which they appear. The two guys from my club that signed are Tier 2, and tell me that their $20,000 is payable over 12 months. Even Tier 1 players are only making $2,916.66 per month for a full-time training commitment. Obviously not all of the best players in the US were willing. I would imagine that the Notable Players (except Inong) have deals that are not part of the Tier system. Less-Notable Players:
Ohio: Pierce Dargan (Clontarf Rugby Club); Alex Elkins (Columbus/1823); Spike Davis(Columbus/1823); Peter Malcolm (Wheeling Jesuit); Roland Suniula (ASRC Chalon/USA); Dylan Fawsitt (Life University); Ahmad Harajly (Detroit Tradesmen RFC/USA 7s); Matt Hughston (Charlotte); Chris Kunkel; (Richmond FC (UK)); Allan Hanson; (Wheeling Jesuit); Taylor Howden; (Columbus Rugby Club); Cam Falcon; (New Orleans Rugby Club); JP Eloff; (Chicago Lions/USA); Shaun Davies; (Life University/USA); Chris Saint; (Potomac Exiles); Nick Civetta; (I Medicei Rugby Firenze); Justin Allen; (Chinnor RFC) ; Angus MacLellan; (Chicago Lions/USA); Chad Joseph (Dallas RFC); Robbie Shaw; (Hartpury RFC/USA); Zac Mizell; (Austin Rugby Club/USA 7s); Anthony Parry; (Columbus Rugby Club) Sacramento: Kyle Sumsion (BYU/USA); Lagakali Tavake (Sacramento Blackhawks); Joeli Tikoisuva (Metropolis RFC); Oliver Kilifi (Seattle Saracens/USA); Sione Sina (Cal); Val Lee-Lo (Seattle Saracens); Jope Motokana (Seattle Saracens); Toke Kefu (Sacramento Blackhawks); Joshua Holland (San Francisco Golden Gate); Ryan Koewler (Sacramento Capitals); John Quill (Dolphin RFC/USA); Mirco Bergamasco (Zebre/Italy); Josh Inong (Santa Rosa); Fatai Vailala (EPA Razorbacks); James Reddey (Sacramento Blackhawks); Harry Bennett (Santa Monica); Garrett Brewer (St. Mary’s) ; Robert Meeson (Santa Rosa); Rashad Harbor (Dallas Reds); Ryan Thompson (Tempe Rugby Club); Nemia Qoro (Life West); Alipate Takiveikata (Metropolis RFC) San Diego: Joe Taufete’e (Belmont Shore/USA); Epeli Kalemani (Santa Monica); Kalei Konrad (OMBAC); Tom Bliss (Wasps/USA); Jabari Zuberi (Santa Monica); Nikola Bursic (Craighouse Old Boys/Chile); Charlie Purdon (Santa Monica); Pono Haitsuka (Mystic River/USA 7s) ; Ryan Matyas (Old Blue/USA); Sam Taungakava (Seattle Saracens); Mikey Te’o (Belmont Shore/USA); Taku Ngwenya (Biarritz Olympique/USA); Tim Stanfill (Seattle Saracens/USA); Michelangelo Sosene-Feagai (Hawkes Bay Magpies/USA); Phil Mackenzie (Sale/Canada); Kurt Morath (Tonga) San Francisco: Kingsley McGowan (St. Mary’s/USA); Dominic Lolohea (Life West); Devereaux Ferris (Life West); Michael Haley (Olympic Club); Jacob Finau (Life West); Siaosi Mahoni (EPA Bulldogs); John Colvill (Life West); Sam Finau (Auckland University); Martini Talapusi (Belfast Rugby Club (NZ)); John O’Hara (Santa Clara University); Tom Coolican (Sydney Stars/USA); David Tameilau (Life West/USA); Michael Reid (Spotwood United); Jacob Finau (Life West); Orene Ai’I (Life West/NZ 7s); Codi Jones (Cal Maritime); Maka Tameilau (Life West); Patrick Latu (San Francisco Golden Gate) More effort posting to come, if there is any indication anyone cares. Stitecin fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Mar 31, 2016 |
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Mar 29, 2016 15:33
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A bit of a California bias detected.
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Mar 29, 2016 15:37
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goatface posted:A bit of a California bias detected. Yeah what's up with no East Coast representation?
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Mar 29, 2016 16:16
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The West Coast of the US had a pretty strong rugby culture back in the early 1900s apparently. Before the All Blacks made them all sad. http://en.espn.co.uk/newzealand/rugby/story/204045.html
Vaders Jester fucked around with this message at 16:28 on Mar 29, 2016 |
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Mar 29, 2016 16:21
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Vaders Jester posted:The West Coast of the US had a pretty strong rugby culture back in the early 1900s apparently. Before the All Blacks made them all sad. http://en.espn.co.uk/newzealand/rugby/story/204045.html The west coast still has rugby culture. Go to the USA Rugby club finder and search for the 200 closest clubs to 95403 (the zipcode for Santa Rosa Rugby Club, the club I play for) and you'll see that are a lot of people playing rugby. I don't know why there haven't been any east coast teams added to the league, because if you go to the search for New York or wherever on that coast you will find clubs there too. If there's a second season I assume they'll be working hard to add a club over there. edit: From the November 9, 2015 announcement of the leage: "Exclusively sanctioned by USA Rugby and World Rugby, competition will begin in April 2016 with six teams in major metropolitan areas in the Northeast, the Rocky Mountains and California." I guess the Northeast club didn't pan out, leaving 5. Stitecin fucked around with this message at 03:49 on Mar 31, 2016 |
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Mar 29, 2016 17:08
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That's cool  Hopefully it continues to grow throughout the US and gives you guys more depth at international level. The 7s team is already a serious contender so with some time the 15s will get there too.
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Mar 29, 2016 17:56
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I agree, I'd love to see the US start to assert ourselves at the test level. It just seems like we're pushing against so many other sports, and we really don't have the club sports system in place. My club was established in 1971 and we have by far the nicest home pitch in the Northern California Rugby Football Union but no "club" facility. We don't have a shed for our scrum machine, much less a locker room/weight room/bar.
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Mar 29, 2016 18:32
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Conor O'Shea said Marler was abused too, remarking that "Posh, English and a four letter word counts one way but not another". Maybe we can throw Lee in the Moron XV alongside Marler and tell World Rugby we've dealt with it and can all move on now?
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Mar 29, 2016 18:49
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Quite a funny segment on the Jonathan Woss show this week. They had Dylan Hartley, Billy Vunipola, Danny Care and Jonathan Joseph on talking about the grand slam. The best bit was Dylan admitting he was told not to leave the locker room after his little head bump. He has absolutely no memory of raising the trophy or celebrating. Oh and Billys singing also made me chuckle. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PS7RFcQ6Dc
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Mar 29, 2016 21:25
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thegasman2000 posted:. The best bit was Dylan admitting he was told not to leave the locker room after his little head bump. He has absolutely no memory of raising the trophy or celebrating. Oh good, glad to see they're ensuring people understand how important the head injury checks are.
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Mar 29, 2016 21:45
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goatface posted:Oh good, glad to see they're ensuring people understand how important the head injury checks are. Sorry reread my post and it does indeed come across that I agreed with him it was acceptable. He is a loving halfwit and allowing him to bypass medical advice is down right dangerous. To then broadcast that across the TV is plain irresponsible. England's captain everyone. 
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Mar 29, 2016 23:00
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BBC is reporting that Josh Charnley has crossed codes to Sale. Wing is possibly one of the only position that works in the UK when people switch codes so this may work well for them.
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Mar 30, 2016 10:01
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Alex Cuthbert is out of the Wales tour to NZ. I guess the kiwis are relieved, the all blacks might stand a chance of winning a game now
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Mar 30, 2016 12:13
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stavros880 posted:Alex Cuthbert is out of the Wales tour to NZ. I guess the kiwis are relieved, the all blacks might stand a chance of winning a game now If anything, Wales seem to perform better with their second choice XV.
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Mar 30, 2016 23:35
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Stitecin posted:Pro Rugby USA effort post update
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Mar 31, 2016 03:41
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Please continue to update us.
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Mar 31, 2016 04:30
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Cardiff have signed Willis Halaholo for next season, so we could be looking at an awesomely named midfield of Lee-lo / Halaholo. No idea if he's any good mind (he's signed for Cardiff though, so that should be a clue). As long as it means Gavin Evans doesn't play, I'm happy.
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Apr 1, 2016 11:26
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At Ulster's penultimate home game of the season, it's wet and cold and we're playing Connacht but sinking a few pints and shouting at men I don't know is a good bit of craic. If you're on the fence about the live experience of rugby take the leap because it's a lot more enjoyable when you're there.
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Apr 1, 2016 20:33
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