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Jonny 290
May 5, 2005



[ASK] me about OS/2 Warp
p sure the mom is huge narcissist, so many signs are there, i bet 70% chance shes tried to boink him

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Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
you think theyll get toni colette to play her in the made for tv adaptation?

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


Kal-L posted:

You know, I kind of feel bad for the dad. He has an idiot son who has killed people and wasn't smart enough to hide his probation violations, and when on the run did not even try to stay down.

Then he has a wife, who leaving all maternal love aside, abides and helps him to run to Mexico, and even then does not try to rein him in to try and stay low for at least a couple of months to let the trail grow cold.

If I was him, I would be looking at divorce lawyers, and start lining up younger, far less dumb women to have sex with me, and who could give me a son who will actually not be an idiot.

the man created the child.

veedubfreak
Apr 2, 2005

by Smythe

Jonny 290 posted:

p sure the mom is huge narcissist, so many signs are there, i bet 70% chance shes tried to boink him

How can a woman that hideous be a narcissist?

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

veedubfreak posted:

How can a woman that hideous be a narcissist?

Honest self-reflection is not a trait of narcissism.

Helsing
Aug 23, 2003

DON'T POST IN THE ELECTION THREAD UNLESS YOU :love::love::love: JOE BIDEN
It's remarkable to think that this guy might have run away because his mom somehow thought fleeing to Mexico would be easier than finding a clean urine sample for his piss test.

Also it's not his fault guys. His attorney's are investigating whether he may have been forced against his will to flee to Mexico and max out his debit card getting drunk at strip clubs.

quote:

'Affluenza' teen may have been forced to flee to Mexico: attorney

Reuters By Marice Richter
2 hours ago

FORT WORTH, Texas (Reuters) - Lawyers for the Texas teenager who killed four people in the "affluenza" drunken-driving case and was captured in Mexico said on Tuesday they are investigating whether the 18-year-old chose to flee or was forced.

Judge Timothy Menikos of Tarrant County juvenile court deferred a ruling on a move to transfer Ethan Couch's case to adult court because his parents were not adequately notified about the proceedings.

Couch and his mother, Tonya Couch, 48, were captured in Puerto Vallarto, Mexico, last month after a manhunt of more than two weeks sparked by allegations the teen violated his probation in the 2013 drunken driving case.

"We are examining the facts ... to determine whether he was taken voluntarily or involuntarily to Mexico," attorney Scott Brown told reporters.

Tarrant County prosecutors contended Couch is responsible for his own absence by fleeing to Mexico. His mother was returned to Texas and faces a third-degree felony charge, accused of helping her son flee, that could result in a 10-year prison sentence if she is convicted.

The teen's parents are divorced, and his father was not present in court on Tuesday.

Helsing
Aug 23, 2003

DON'T POST IN THE ELECTION THREAD UNLESS YOU :love::love::love: JOE BIDEN
Best part of this by far is that in the 2013 case there's no evidence that the "affluenza" argument made any difference in Couch's sentencing -- he got off cause he had money, not because of anything a shrink said. I don't think affluenza even comes up in the judgement.

But it was such a loving heinous argument to make that he's internationally famous now and the police are dedicating extra resources to get him back because he's so universally reviled. If his lawyer never mentioned "affluenza" to begin with he never would have attracted any notice and probably wouldn't have been busted for violating parole.

wireframeskull
Dec 3, 2006

It was the affluenza again! The affluenza made him do it!

veedubfreak
Apr 2, 2005

by Smythe

Helsing posted:

Best part of this by far is that in the 2013 case there's no evidence that the "affluenza" argument made any difference in Couch's sentencing -- he got off cause he had money, not because of anything a shrink said. I don't think affluenza even comes up in the judgement.

But it was such a loving heinous argument to make that he's internationally famous now and the police are dedicating extra resources to get him back because he's so universally reviled. If his lawyer never mentioned "affluenza" to begin with he never would have attracted any notice and probably wouldn't have been busted for violating parole.

He got off because his family paid the judge enough money to retire.

Regalingualius
Jan 7, 2012

We gazed into the eyes of madness... And all we found was horny.




Helsing posted:

It's remarkable to think that this guy might have run away because his mom somehow thought fleeing to Mexico would be easier than finding a clean urine sample for his piss test.

Also it's not his fault guys. His attorney's are investigating whether he may have been forced against his will to flee to Mexico and max out his debit card getting drunk at strip clubs.

In what very little defense I can muster up for him, I wouldn't necessarily be surprised if he was Shanghaied by his parents into going along with the plan to flee to Mexico.

Granted, the whole situation is still ultimately his fault in the first place for not keeping his rear end clean, so I'm not feeling particularly hung up for him.

Kal-L
Jan 18, 2005

Heh... Spider-man... Web searches... That's funny. I should've trademarked that one. Could've made a mint.

Doctor Schnabel posted:

he already divorced her, bro. then they remarried because he likes it freaky. he also got busted for impersonating a cop and was a known rear end in a top hat. samson this guy is not


Groovelord Neato posted:

the man created the child.

Well, I stand corrected. They all deserve what's coming to them.

Berious
Nov 13, 2005
I feel bad for the dad. Even hitler didn't deserve a failson full of that much fail

I hope he opened a bottle of champagne when his harpy wife phoned to tell him he'd never see his failson or her again :unsmith:

Jubs
Jul 11, 2006

Boy, I think it's about time I tell you the difference between a man and a woman. A woman isn't a woman unless she's pretty. And a man isn't a man unless he's ugly.

Berious posted:

I feel bad for the dad. Even hitler didn't deserve a failson full of that much fail

I hope he opened a bottle of champagne when his harpy wife phoned to tell him he'd never see his failson or her again :unsmith:

He's not a very good person either.

quote:

Tonya said the marriage ended because Fred had been verbally and physically abusive. She said he’d call her names, that he often grabbed her by the hair, and that he once “threw her into a fireplace.” She said Fred pushed and choked the daughter from her first marriage and that during a fight he’d threatened to “burn the house down.” Ethan’s half-sister told the social worker that she had seen Fred “slap her mother when she was pregnant with Ethan.” Tonya also accused him of having multiple affairs and manipulating family members with money.

The police were called to their house often—including during the social worker’s visit with Fred—and though officers occasionally advised Fred to leave the residence, there were no arrests. Fred was arrested at one point when he punched someone on a construction site, but he didn’t serve time.

quote:

Over the years, Anderson saw Ethan’s parents get into more than one screaming match in the parking lot, almost always in front of the boy. One time, as they yelled at each other, Fred locked the doors of his truck with Ethan inside and threatened to speed away. The police showed up, but nobody got in trouble.

Fred always had a short fuse. “He’d been angry since childhood,” a psychologist testified. “He was a big guy, kind of rednecky, didn’t take no poo poo from nobody. And so there’s a litany of times where he had disagreements with people, and he wants to go outside and settle it. And he has roughed people up. And he’s loud.”

quote:

"One day, when Ethan was 13, Anderson noticed that he’d driven himself to school. She was concerned and talked to Fred about it. The father didn’t react well. “He told me that Ethan was the best driver he knew,” she says. “He was adamant that Ethan was going to drive to school. He believed his son was better. His son was more talented. He was the golden boy.”

Fred told her that Ethan didn’t need college anyway, that he’d take over the family business soon. According to court documents, his response to the confrontation was something along the lines of: “I’ll buy the school.” In the end, Fred pulled Ethan out and enrolled him in a homeschool co-op program in Watauga. But by the time he was 15, he was done with that, too.

quote:

Fred and Tonya split up again a few months after the crash. The stress was overwhelming. In the summer of 2014, Fred was charged with impersonating a police officer in North Richland Hills. The circumstances aren’t clear, and his attorney advised him not to answer questions about the incident during his deposition. But apparently officers responded to a disturbance call in the middle of the night, and, when they arrived, Fred was there. He identified himself as a Lakeside police officer. One of the officers happened to have worked in Lakeside and didn’t remember him. When Fred showed them a badge, they let him go, but the officer called the Lakeside chief later and confirmed that Fred was not on the force.

A warrant was issued for his arrest, and he turned himself in. Within a few minutes, he paid a $2,500 bail and walked away.

Jubs fucked around with this message at 21:46 on Jan 20, 2016

CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen

So basically what I'm reading is that this kid was hopeless from the start

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL

CharlestonJew posted:

So basically what I'm reading is that this kid was hopeless from the start

affluenza

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

CharlestonJew posted:

So basically what I'm reading is that this kid was hopeless from the start

Yeah. Castration for the family and all direct relations IMO.

DrManiac
Feb 29, 2012

Sounds like good ol dad had affuenza too. He pretty much bought his was out of all the terrible poo poo he did too.

veedubfreak
Apr 2, 2005

by Smythe

TEAYCHES posted:

Yeah. Castration for the family and all direct relations IMO.

3 .22 bullets are cheaper. One to the back of each of their heads.

Regalingualius
Jan 7, 2012

We gazed into the eyes of madness... And all we found was horny.




Looks like dear Ethan Boy managed to slip out of Mexico by waiving his fight against extradition.

Strategic Tea
Sep 1, 2012

so how does it work in america, do you actually have to bribe the police or do they just not arrest you on principle?

i need to know for a friend

ProperCauldron
Oct 11, 2004

nah chill

quote:

Couch seemed "fine" and "in good health," the sheriff said.

"He was very calm. He was very quiet, very passive, not at all argumentative or resistant. He followed every direction. His only request is he was hungry and wanted something to eat," Anderson said. "He was as compliant and as docile as anyone we have ever seen coming into a facility."

why does the law suck his dick so much

Dial-a-Dog
May 22, 2001

Strategic Tea posted:

so how does it work in america, do you actually have to bribe the police or do they just not arrest you on principle?

i need to know for a friend

We're taught from birth that rich people are better, so once you're rich enough you don't even need to bribe people it's just on principle

This kid's family wasn't that level of rich because they still had to bribe the judge

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

Aralan posted:

We're taught from birth that rich people are better, so once you're rich enough you don't even need to bribe people it's just on principle

This kid's family wasn't that level of rich because they still had to bribe the judge

That's not been. Proven

WescottF1
Oct 21, 2000
Forums Veteran
Well, he got 720 days in jail. Still a slap on the wrist, but it's something I guess.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2016/04/13/latest-texas-affluenza-teen-to-remain-in-jail.html

WIFEY WATCHDOG
Jun 25, 2012

Yeah, well I don't trust this guy. I think he regifted, he degifted, and now he's using an upstairs invite as a springboard to a Super Bowl sex romp.

WescottF1 posted:

Well, he got 720 days in jail. Still a slap on the wrist, but it's something I guess.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2016/04/13/latest-texas-affluenza-teen-to-remain-in-jail.html

Hope he serves every fuckin minute and gets his salad tossed EVERY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHISHKABOB
Nov 30, 2012

Fun Shoe
It's possible , but I don't think my dad is rich enough for it.

THE BIG DOG DADDY
Oct 16, 2013

Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.


No one talks about this.
Hey guys, so it looks like I'll be going away for a couple years. It's been fun and all but I guess the court system feels like making an example of me. Take care, gg all.

Vastarien
Dec 20, 2012

Where I live is nightmare, thus a certain nonchalance.



Buglord

YA BOY ETHAN COUCH posted:

Hey guys, so it looks like I'll be going away for a couple years. It's been fun and all but I guess the court system feels like making an example of me. Take care, gg all.

can i borrow like 20 bucks before you go?

ruddiger
Jun 3, 2004

The judge who originally tried the affluenza case is probably the biggest loving affluenzic in the world.

THE BIG DOG DADDY
Oct 16, 2013

Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.


No one talks about this.
Dumbass judge probably never got invited to a party when he was in school so he mad.

I'll get mad conjugal visits though and my lawyer is working out a deal to let me out on weekends as long as I write a letter of apology and apply to a community college so we'll see

THE BIG DOG DADDY
Oct 16, 2013

Rasheed was, with Aliases, the top 7 PvPers in Bone Krew.


No one talks about this.

Dr. Tim Whatley posted:

Hope he serves every fuckin minute and gets his salad tossed EVERY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:ohdear:

DONKEY SALAMI
Jun 28, 2008

donkey? donkey?

if his salad is getting tossed wouldnt that mean his bunghole is getting the licking?

WIFEY WATCHDOG
Jun 25, 2012

Yeah, well I don't trust this guy. I think he regifted, he degifted, and now he's using an upstairs invite as a springboard to a Super Bowl sex romp.

donkey salami posted:

if his salad is getting tossed wouldnt that mean his bunghole is getting the licking?

No, it means a quality and healthy dinner consisting of green leafy veggies and a sensible portion of protein and starches.

Autechresaint
Jan 25, 2012

WescottF1 posted:

Well, he got 720 days in jail. Still a slap on the wrist, but it's something I guess.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2016/04/13/latest-texas-affluenza-teen-to-remain-in-jail.html

For once the foxnews comments help with why it's so light:
"Do keep in mind that while the sentence is way too light, he was a juvenile when it happened originally.

They were not able to certify him as an adult then.

So he got probation.

He violated probation, and therefore the original sentencing is reopened.

But it's still based on the original case and original trial.

So while he is now in adult court, it's not a new case in adult court.

It's still going back to what age he was at the time of the crime, and the sentences available then.

If any one commits a crime at say age 15, and for whatever reason it takes 3 years to go to trial - the crime was still committed by a juvenile. It's not what age you are when it goes to trial but when the crime was committed."

veedubfreak
Apr 2, 2005

by Smythe
Eh, I'm sure he'll do something stupid as soon as he gets out and go to big boy jail. Rich pieces of poo poo never change.

bag em and tag em
Nov 4, 2008
I have povertitius.

Soup du Journey
Mar 20, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
so is there a period of probation again once he gets out? i dont know how any of this works

Knight
Dec 23, 2000

SPACE-A-HOLIC
Taco Defender

Doctor Schnabel posted:

so is there a period of probation again once he gets out? i dont know how any of this works
It doesn't

Fiend
Dec 2, 2001

RedMage129 posted:

I have povertitius.

See also: excited delerium

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blugu64
Jul 17, 2006

Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?
He's extremely lucky he didn't get stuck in Mexico due to the handgun down there.

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