blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

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during which ancient egyptian month will blackberry die?
	thout
	paopi
	hathor
	koiak
	tobi
	meshir
	paremhat
	paremoude
	pashons
	paoni
	epip
	mesori
	gasthred
	banop
	RIM'S GONNA KEEP GOING BABY!!!

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uninterrupted: Jun 20, 2011; It is critical that we remember the real victims of the Holocaust: the Soviets.

Claiming that the Holocaust was about Jews is Zionism. Biden is doing it to provide cover to Israel!

Mr. Apollo posted:

i think so. they're no longer producing their own OS. �\_(ツ)_/�

yeah, but are they still making their BES server software?

# ? Apr 12, 2016 20:33

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# ? May 9, 2024 05:08

ahmeni: May 1, 2005; It's one continuous form where hardware and software function in perfect unison, creating a new generation of iPhone that's better by any measure.; Grimey Drawer

I can't find my old bbm anus girl avatar

# ? Apr 13, 2016 00:07

Squizzle: Apr 24, 2008

ahmeni posted:

I can't find my old bbm anus girl avatar

# ? Apr 13, 2016 02:19

Necc0: Jun 30, 2005; by exmarx; Broken Cake

so did them going private via an external buyout not *technically* count since it wasn't a competitor?

# ? Apr 13, 2016 14:27

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

so excited that blackberry is becoming the Polaroid of phones

# ? Apr 13, 2016 14:36

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

theflyingexecutive posted:

so excited that blackberry is becoming the Polaroid of phones

Shake it, shake, shake it
Shake it for a battery pull reset

# ? Apr 13, 2016 14:54

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

Necc0 posted:

so did them going private via an external buyout not *technically* count since it wasn't a competitor?

they're not private, they're still a public company

current stock price: $7.12 USD
market cap: $3.75 billion

arguably they are indentured to their lenders, who appointed the CEO and basically have a lien on everything now.

# ? Apr 13, 2016 15:12

Bonzo: Mar 11, 2004; Just like Mama used to make it!

They wanted to go private so they could do what they wanted without shareholders yelling at them. They also wouldn't have to report their pitiful numbers to the public

# ? Apr 13, 2016 16:13

Necc0: Jun 30, 2005; by exmarx; Broken Cake

The Management posted:

they're not private, they're still a public company

current stock price: $7.12 USD
market cap: $3.75 billion

arguably they are indentured to their lenders, who appointed the CEO and basically have a lien on everything now.

oh lol they only planned to go private but the deal
fell through and their stocks plummeted. I guess I missed that

# ? Apr 13, 2016 20:51

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

would you buy a sinking ship just to plunder it?

# ? Apr 13, 2016 20:56

Tayter Swift: Nov 18, 2002; Pillbug

I dunno, why don't you ask those guys who stole that truck full of playbooks

# ? Apr 13, 2016 21:01

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

man, how dumb did those guys feel when they realized they stole a truck full of playbooks?

# ? Apr 13, 2016 21:14

Mr. Apollo: Nov 8, 2000

and it was recovered a couple of weeks later so bb couldn't make an insurance claim

# ? Apr 13, 2016 21:33

Tayter Swift: Nov 18, 2002; Pillbug

if ever there was a victimless crime

# ? Apr 13, 2016 21:49

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Kenny Logins posted:

Shake it, shake, shake it
Shake it for a battery pull reset

# ? Apr 13, 2016 22:31

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

infernal machines posted:

man, how dumb did those guys feel when they realized they stole a truck full of playbooks?

Mr. Apollo posted:

and it was recovered a couple of weeks later so bb couldn't make an insurance claim

leave it to blackberry to gently caress up a perfectly workable insurance fraud

# ? Apr 13, 2016 22:35

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

even they couldn't come up with a plausible reason for someone stealing a truckload of tablets no one wanted to buy

# ? Apr 13, 2016 22:41

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

finally got back up to speed on this thread after letting it slide for a year and goddamn was this the time to do it

# ? Apr 14, 2016 01:43

Squizzle: Apr 24, 2008

c'mon blackberry, release a wearable. i've been sitting on these "blackberry death watch" jokes for way too long

# ? Apr 14, 2016 10:24

ahmeni: May 1, 2005; It's one continuous form where hardware and software function in perfect unison, creating a new generation of iPhone that's better by any measure.; Grimey Drawer

Squizzle posted:

nice, thanks
the bbm logo is smaller than I thought though, was gonna try and replace it with an android

# ? Apr 14, 2016 12:54

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

quote:

A high-level surveillance probe of Montreal's criminal underworld shows that Canada's federal policing agency has had a global encryption key for BlackBerry devices since 2010.

The revelations are contained in a stack of court documents that were made public after members of a Montreal crime syndicate pleaded guilty to their role in a 2011 gangland murder. The documents shed light on the extent to which the smartphone manufacturer, as well as telecommunications giant Rogers, cooperated with investigators.

According to technical reports by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police that were filed in court, law enforcement intercepted and decrypted roughly one million PIN-to-PIN BlackBerry messages in connection with the probe. The report doesn't disclose exactly where the key � effectively a piece of code that could break the encryption on virtually any BlackBerry message sent from one device to another � came from. But, as one police officer put it, it was a key that could unlock millions of doors.

Government lawyers spent almost two years fighting in a Montreal courtroom to keep this information out of the public record.

And while neither the RCMP nor BlackBerry confirmed that the cellphone manufacturer handed over the global encryption key, and both fought against a judge's order to release more information about their working relationship, the Crown prosecutors admitted that the federal police service had access to the key.

https://news.vice.com/article/exclusive-canada-police-obtained-blackberrys-global-decryption-key-how

# ? Apr 14, 2016 15:35

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

lmao, literally the last thing they could hang their hat on and it's loving gone

# ? Apr 14, 2016 15:47

Asymmetric POSTer: Aug 17, 2005

tools not toys

# ? Apr 14, 2016 15:49

Dolomite: Jul 26, 2000; Cars & Legs

Pinterest Mom posted:

https://news.vice.com/article/exclusive-canada-police-obtained-blackberrys-global-decryption-key-how

hahahaha

quote:

"We're the only people who really secure Android, taking the security features of BlackBerry that everyone knows us for and make it more reachable for the market," he said.

# ? Apr 14, 2016 16:05

BANME.sh: Jan 23, 2008; What is this??
Are you some kind of hypnotist??; Grimey Drawer

wrap it up rimailures

# ? Apr 14, 2016 16:52

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

Just-In-Timeberlake posted:

lmao, literally the last thing they could hang their hat on and it's loving gone

how was this the last thing they could hang their hat on? they gave the keys to loving pakistan and saudi arabia years ago. there is a 100% chance the american intelligence services have had them since day one.

# ? Apr 14, 2016 17:18

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

i get that their marketing has been repeating "rim is secure" as a mantra, but that has literally never been true, ever. they didn't have device encryption as a default until bb os10 for fucks sake

# ? Apr 14, 2016 17:21

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

infernal machines posted:

how was this the last thing they could hang their hat on? they gave the keys to loving pakistan and saudi arabia years ago. there is a 100% chance the american intelligence services have had them since day one.

this interview is over

# ? Apr 14, 2016 20:37

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

infernal machines posted:

how was this the last thing they could hang their hat on? they gave the keys to loving pakistan and saudi arabia years ago. there is a 100% chance the american intelligence services have had them since day one.

day four or so, this is the federal government you're talking about

just needed bob to get off his rear end and phone blackberry

# ? Apr 14, 2016 22:34

Bonzo: Mar 11, 2004; Just like Mama used to make it!

Pack it up boys

https://news.vice.com/article/exclusive-canada-police-obtained-blackberrys-global-decryption-key-how?utm_source=vicenewstwitter

quote:

A high-level surveillance probe of Montreal's criminal underworld shows that Canada's federal policing agency has had a global encryption key for BlackBerry devices since 2010.

The revelations are contained in a stack of court documents that were made public after members of a Montreal crime syndicate pleaded guilty to their role in a 2011 gangland murder. The documents shed light on the extent to which the smartphone manufacturer, as well as telecommunications giant Rogers, cooperated with investigators.

According to technical reports by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police that were filed in court, law enforcement intercepted and decrypted roughly one million PIN-to-PIN BlackBerry messages in connection with the probe. The report doesn't disclose exactly where the key � effectively a piece of code that could break the encryption on virtually any BlackBerry message sent from one device to another � came from. But, as one police officer put it, it was a key that could unlock millions of doors.

Government lawyers spent almost two years fighting in a Montreal courtroom to keep this information out of the public record.

# ? Apr 15, 2016 00:53

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

Bonzo posted:

Pack it up boys

https://news.vice.com/article/exclusive-canada-police-obtained-blackberrys-global-decryption-key-how?utm_source=vicenewstwitter

it's on this page

# ? Apr 15, 2016 01:01

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

by was never secure for users, it was made to be secure for employers and governments

# ? Apr 15, 2016 01:06

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

Bonzo posted:

Pack it up boys

reported

# ? Apr 15, 2016 02:18

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

theflyingexecutive posted:

by was never secure for users, it was made to be secure for employers and governments

and yet it wasn't that either. all comms go through a single data center, the only reason bby didn't show up in the snowden ppts is that no one gives a gently caress about rim.

# ? Apr 15, 2016 03:21

Bonzo: Mar 11, 2004; Just like Mama used to make it!

The Management posted:

reported

this interview is over

# ? Apr 15, 2016 03:23

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

were they still pushing everything through north america after the european outage because nobody who knew how to fail the services back over worked there any more?

# ? Apr 15, 2016 18:29

The Management: Jan 2, 2010; sup, bitch?

their traffic must be down considerably since those days. not much reason to keep a second data center open unless you care about service uptime, which they probably don't anymore

# ? Apr 15, 2016 18:42

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

reminder that part of rim's ultra secure mdm solution required a hacky mess of lashed together java, and a superuser account with full ownership rights over every user object in your ad domain so that it could shuffle messages in and out of exchange

if your bes service account were ever compromised (it needed logon as service and interactive logon rights) so was your entire domain.

rim has been about as actively anti-secure as possible. and again, the phones didn't use device encryption by default until bb10

# ? Apr 15, 2016 19:00

Just-In-Timeberlake: Aug 18, 2003

again, if you haven't read Losing the Signal, I highly suggest you do.

# ? Apr 15, 2016 19:21

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# ? May 9, 2024 05:08

buttcrackmenace: Nov 14, 2007; see its right there in the manual where it says; Grimey Drawer

Pinterest Mom posted:

https://news.vice.com/article/exclusive-canada-police-obtained-blackberrys-global-decryption-key-how

that thump you just heard
that was Tim b
dropping the mic
and walking the gently caress off

# ? Apr 15, 2016 22:33

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > blackberry deathwatch 2014.10.2.1.537 (now with fm radio) [plus canadachat]

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