|
Otacon posted:jessica dupre what are your thoughts and/or opinions on the mcrib, please whisper them into my roboear erotically MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED ASMR
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 02:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 26, 2024 01:58 |
|
|
ANIME IS BLOOD posted:MY NIGGA HAVE YOU TRIED ASMR i have a steam copy of ASMR Universe because of a bundle, i'm gonna try it now and let you, personally, know if i get a boner.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 02:26
|
|
|
time to dust off the old "flying dicks everywhere" tactic on her second life avatar
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 02:29
|
|
|
max4me posted:This thread caused me to dig up my second probation here which was for misogyny in a failed attempt at a E/N thread. Put me on the bad side of icequeen. I went back and looked at that abortion and this stood out.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 02:48
|
|
|
Where are you guys finding those trippy slow-motion metal cut cutting gifs? I could watch those things all drat day.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 03:02
|
|
|
i met geckolio IRL edit: twice i think
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 04:02
|
|
|
I think we might be going a little too hard on poor Jessica. As a token of good will I dug up some hot, hot erotica for her viewing pleasure.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpo2UJJswrE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mcGnZPh3ZIw
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 06:14
|
|
|
Senpai noticed us. (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 06:50
|
|
|
icequeen was ralp before ralp, in that absolutely nobody liked her as mod
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 07:21
|
|
|
please no one tell William Gibson about this, I liked The Peripheral and am hoping he will write more books, and this might cause him to stroke out
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 07:59
|
|
|
MY PALE GOTH SKIN posted:please no one tell William Gibson about this, I liked The Peripheral and am hoping he will write more books, and this might cause him to stroke out
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:19
|
|
|
Mishap on the Trail Jessica led the way on the trail, her boyfriend Miles struggling to keep up despite his own enviable strength and endurance. He watched her practically dance over patches of rocks and mud, sprinting up steep hills, only to stop and taunt him at the top. “Hey, I thought you were a marathon runner!” she called down through cupped hands, locks of golden blond hair falling loose from her thick, voluminous updo. She let out a charming laugh and then returned to her energetic, bouncy run. His breath was ragged, but the sight of her athletic legs in those running tights, the way the waistband hugged her hips and lower abs, kept him moving. He’d preferred the earlier tests of the Nexus unit’s performance capabilities, if he didn’t say so. She had even brought him breakfast in bed before they’d hit the trails. Miles glanced at his watch, then touched the comm unit wired to his ear. “Op center, this is Miles. I told you to slow her down a little. Her last mile was under six minutes, and her dermal layer isn’t even producing sweat.” The operator monitoring Jessica’s systems told Miles that they were having trouble communicating with all of her systems at the moment. The best they could do was initiate a pause, and he could make adjustments manually. “Her performance accelerator might’ve been knocked on high by accident, due to all the jostling.” “Fine,” Miles said. “Do it.” Thankfully, Miles picked up his pace for half a mile and then, rounding a corner, found Jessica “resting” at an overlook. He could see for miles from this elevation, and it was almost as beautiful as the sight of Jessica standing still with a blank look on her face, arms by her side, lips slightly parted. He grunted a little, seeing her like that, showing off her thigh gap and toned arms and flat abs in that little purple sports bra. It was almost ridiculous how attractive they’d made her. His arousal grew as he pressed his thumb into the soft area at the base of her skull, held it for four seconds, and watched a thin rectangle appear in Jessica’s breastbone. The patch of skin flipped up like the top of a container, revealing what someone would’ve described as the flat surface of a smartphone. He tapped away, accessing Jessica’s menu, and then toggled her performance settings. Meanwhile, the once cheerful, boastful athlete stared onward, brow slightly furrowed, as if deeply confused by something. After closing the panel, Miles reactivated the Jessica unit and watched her head rattle for a few seconds during her startup routine. Her eyes blinked several times before focusing on him. She smiled, “Miles! I think I’m ready to cool down a little now, aren’t you?” Before he could say anything, she repeated herself, blinking one eye repeatedly. “I think it’s time to cool down now, now, n-n-n-n-ow. Don’t you? Don’t you?” She twisted her hips, pointed her feet toward the trail, and began a comical windup girl strut, straight into a tree. “Jessica, hold up!” Miles tried to stop her, but it was too late. She crashed into a large oak, tossing her head back like she’d just been punched in the forehead as she shuffled away. She redirected, but then walked into another tree with the same unsettling results. “Oh, I think I’m ready to cool down now. Don’t you? Don’t you?” Jessica’s torso pitched forward at the hips, then she righted herself, grabbing at her hair as her head rotated back and forth. “Ready to cool down now. Don’t we all? A marathon…I’m now for stretching up, shoes. Yeah?” Her eyes popped wide open, and for a moment her body spasmed until she seemed to gain control of her limbs. But the she swiveled her upper half in several directions and started to burp smoke. What had Miles done to her? She’d been performing perfectly until now. When Jessica started strutting toward the edge of the overpass, Miles dashed after and caught her by the shoulders, guiding her over to a boulder. She resisted, trying to walk forward and swinging her arms as he pushed her backwards. He kept calling her name, but she didn’t even look at him, as if she were sleep walking. He pressed down on her collar bones, forcing Jessica into a seated position. Jessica looked up at him with a bright smile, loose locks of blond hair framing her face as her updo unraveled further. Sun glinted in her glowing blue eyes, almost super-human in their hue. Her beauty still took his breath away. That was, until one of her eyes faded out, then returned with a bright red glow. Her smile turned into a parody as those luscious pink lips sagged down on one side. “Oh, poo poo,” Miles said, fumbling behind her head for the off switch. Meanwhile, Jessica’s eyes blinked alternately like a broken animatronic doll. Her head began to vibrate, giving her voice a shallow, shaky sound as she uttered the same few phrases over and over again. “It’s time to cool down. Time to, time to, time to cool down. Don’t you? I’m thought you had were a marathon cool, Miles. I time you marathon was a now-now-now.” Miles touched his comm unit. “drat it, op man. We’ve got speech parsing errors now. I thought I told you to debug her control panel last time. You did? Well, you screwed it up even worse. I’m going to have to carry her down this drat mountain now.” Which turned out to be less of a hassle than he liked to let on. He deactivated Jessica just as smoke began to plume from her ears, and there was a good chance they could at least save some of her core processing components and files if they were careful. Otherwise, a malfunction like this one called for a complete disassembly of the torso and cranial unit for inspection and testing. It was really too bad, but maybe they could get her up and running again by the end of the week. He bent down and wrapped his arms around the defunct Jessica unit, lifting her over one shoulder. As he walked down the trail, one hand clapped across the back of her thigh for support, her breasts gently brushing his back as her arms dangled this way and that, he hoped he wouldn’t encounter any other hikers. That would be hard to explain.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:40
|
|
|
This thread is lit
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:43
|
|
|
Much like her lovely blog my lovely posts are free to read
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:50
|
|
|
Being a Universal Soldier is my fetish too
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:54
|
|
|
zen death robot posted:People still manage to autoban by mistake after 16 years too despite the giant warning saying not to use these tags. No one reads the rules, that's for suckers! Do you have to pay the $10 if you do this?
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 08:57
|
|
|
Zorodius posted:WARNING: EXTREME SEXY I am rising the stakes here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNhpKra0AsM
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 09:17
|
|
|
well you could always not pay and just run away from the spidercock screaming
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 10:32
|
|
|
ive literally never read the rules to a website and im not going to start now
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 12:03
|
|
|
thathonkey posted:ive literally never read the rules to a website and im not going to start now
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 12:13
|
|
|
Screw the rules, I have money
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:06
|
|
|
autoaim.cfg posted:Since this clueless *special snowflake* is obviously reading this thread while hyperventilating and wetting herself, I'm going to go ahead and quote this again. oh poo poo autoaim i ain't seen you in a age, i was worried you had gone to ground because little nicky came at you irl or something
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:23
|
|
|
bongwizzard posted:Where are you guys finding those trippy slow-motion metal cut cutting gifs? I could watch those things all drat day. Lol if you aren't making money watching that poo poo in fast motion
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:27
|
|
|
Alan Smithee posted:well you could always not pay and just run away from the spidercock screaming The ban screen doesn't use spidercock anymore.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:46
|
|
|
ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:The ban screen doesn't use spidercock anymore. Thanks Obama 
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:52
|
|
|
What components did she have in her head that would overheat and smoke like that?
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:55
|
|
|
Sex bots just haven't been the same since they banned lead solder.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:56
|
|
|
Applewhite posted:What components did she have in her head that would overheat and smoke like that? her head doubles as a bong
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 13:58
|
|
|
If seeing a woman and finding her to be attractive is sexist, then does that mean that oppressive Islamic nations are actually more progressive by forcing women to wear trash bags over their whole body? Is this why Muslim extremists kill women so often? So that they won't look like they only target men? It is all clear to me now. ISIS is the true feminists! Praise Allah!
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 17:37
|
|
|
The Skeleton King posted:If seeing a woman and finding her to be attractive is sexist, then does that mean that oppressive Islamic nations are actually more progressive by forcing women to wear trash bags over their whole body? They got like a hooker in hardly any clothes bending over or some poo poo and then they got some guy to shove you if you look at her, even if you are just looking at her because she is a person and not totally eye-loving her. But I don't know, I think I should be able to look at people and find them attractive without getting shoved. 
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 17:42
|
|
|
ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:Mishap on the Trail Austin Powers
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 18:05
|
|
|
super-human hue??
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 18:27
|
|
|
Keg posted:Lowtax can you buy her book and force Fragmaster to read it aloud for us? I want to second this! But.... have Shmorkywife do it instead. Preferably unmedicated!  The White Dragon posted:oh poo poo autoaim i ain't seen you in a age, i was worried you had gone to ground because little nicky came at you irl or something Hell no!  Nicky's still out there and batshit insane and we're still keeping tabs on him.I never left SA. I don't post that much though. Never really did, unless I got involved in a thread. I'm more of a lurker, really. autoaim.cfg fucked around with this message at 19:39 on Apr 24, 2016 |
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 19:27
|
|
|
The Skeleton King posted:If seeing a woman and finding her to be attractive is sexist, then does that mean that oppressive Islamic nations are actually more progressive by forcing women to wear trash bags over their whole body? They aren't white, therefore they can not oppress.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 20:31
|
|
|
Is this the new mra thread?
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 20:41
|
|
|
I think this is the new thread about axes? I'm looking at getting an axe for manually chopping down trees on my property. I've only purchased splitting axes and mauls before and was wondering if someone could hit me up with some solid suggestions for axes? My current splitting axe is a gransfors from the 70s, I've had to replace the shaft twice and have it sharpened but its a great hunk of metal. Also, any tips on removing trees from your property? I've got around a hundred pines I want to get rid of and was wondering if anyone had dealt with that before.
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 20:57
|
|
|
Volume posted:Is this the new mra thread? If by MRA you mean Make-believe Robot Attraction, then yes
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 20:58
|
|
|
Do gynoids dream of electric dick
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 21:09
|
|
|
Wowbagger2004 posted:Do gynoids dream of electric dick
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 21:32
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 26, 2024 01:58 |
|
|
Rape Stink posted:If by MRA you mean Make-believe Robot Attraction, then yes
|
|
#
?
Apr 24, 2016 21:35
|
|