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glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

Volume posted:

My point, sir,

gold, jerry

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Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.
My child, give me your heart,
and let your eyes observe my ways.

For a prostitute is a deep pit;
an adulteress is a narrow well.


fine advice from Proverbs 23:27 regarding the tightness of hookers

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
All entertainment is EVIL! Wake up, church!!

Sometimes I just want to unplug this computer and take a vacation from all the filth and violence so readily available. It’s not like I go looking for trouble, it’s trouble finding me when I least expect it.

My persecution here is indirect. I go to YouTube, for instance, for some Godly music, and I end up looking at a bunch of trashy videos that wouldn’t have existed 40 years ago, when decency and the fear of God still reigned. There was no such thing as a computer back then, and folks were better off. Then when I try to speak of the Love of God and pass on the Gospel, I get ramrodded.

I tell you, the elites who dredged up the slime and filth of the occult system wanted to control mankind so much that they started Communism within our own borders, e.g. the brainwashing of public school students circa 1963. They cried, “We don’t want the Bible! Goodbye God!!” And the church of Jesus Christ quietly stepped aside and proceeded to fall into a deep slumber.

Ever since those horrible days of “free love” and the Beatles (or the “roaches,” if you ask me), everything decent turned foul and began to rot spiritually. Without God you have chaos, anarchy and pure evil. I am completely ashamed of and embarrassed by my own generation. You think it’s bad now? Wait till the church is raptured out.

Kids today wouldn’t know decency if it hit them upside the head. Apparently our children and youth are being indoctrinated into thinking that watching and recording violence and scum are much to be desired. Since we are “conveniently” living in a spy state of everyone recording everyone else, as soon as a scandal, an undesirable person or fight comes on the scene, they’ve got to break out their iPhone or Google Glass and start filming everything. Then they post it on BoobTube and they get millions of hits, and in some instances, they get paid big money too. You know who is in charge of all this, don’t you? Old Splitfoot!! The one for whom celebrities worship and eat feces and drink urine! Hip hip hooray! (UGH.)

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

Volume posted:

the Beatles(or the “roaches,” if you ask me)

:anttony: :j:

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007



From the future ark exhibit

coolskull
Nov 11, 2007


for olds who won't admit they have no grandchildren

glowstick party tonight
Oct 4, 2003

by zen death robot

LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:

for olds who won't admit they have no grandchildren

son gay. so what

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Miss Parton is infamous for her role in such worldly films as, “The Best Little Whore House In Texas.” She is infamous for her giant fake breasts! Her profession of Christian faith is as big and fake as her breasts!!! Perhaps you ask, “What right do you have to criticize Dolly Parton?” Hey, she is a public figure, and has tens-of-millions of fans worldwide. So when she teaches the Devil's lie that everyone is God's child, faithful true Christians need to refute her heresy. Decent people need to rebuke her indecency, which influences our youth. Dolly Parton is a role model, and so she ought to be criticized for behaving shamefully, taking her clothes off in public and serving the Devil. This is not condemning Dolly (that is God's place alone - James 4:12); but rather, it is refuting her works of darkness, as Ephesians 5:11 commands every believer to do.

Dolly defends her attire and behavior that causes lasciviousness (sensuality that leads to lust and immorality):

Is God shallow Dolly? Are all the God-fearing, faithful, people-loving, sin-hating, soul-winning, Bible-preaching, uncompromising, preachers across the world “shallow” for preaching that females ought to dress modestly? Dolly Parton is trying to justify her public lewdness, nudity and sensuality as a form of glamour art. The Bible calls it the sin of lust! 1st Peter 2:11, “Dearly beloved, I beseech you as strangers and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts, which war against the soul.” Dolly speaks arrogantly, defiantly and with rebellion against the Holy Scriptures, which teach that a woman ought to dress in modest apparel (1st Timothy 2:9). Miss Parton is now 70-years-old and eternity is drawing nearer and nearer for her. Life is short, Hell is hot, and eternity is a long time.

I am not condemning Dolly Parton for her sins and faults, for I am the biggest sinner that I know (and you are too if you'll be honest with yourself). However, I am exposing Dolly Parton as a false prophet for saying that we are all God's children (as I will address next). I am exposing Dolly Parton for exposing her thighs and breasts in public, and defending it as mere girly glamour. No, it is lasciviousness!!! It is sensuality, lust and mental adultery! It is a wicked thing to defend immodest clothing, the attire of a harlot (Proverbs 7:10), as being an acceptable form of art. No, it is a sin!!! Dolly defends her public indecency and sexually promiscuous attire as “glamour.” Isaiah 5:20, “Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!”

GORILLA BASTARD
Jun 20, 2005

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Hah! Hilarious.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
No, God's Penis is not a biological organ. I never said God's Penis was the same as man's penis. Obviously it wouldn't be. That is why I pointed out God has a Holy, Righteous Penis. That is to say, it's not the same as man's corrupted, fleshy one.

As I said when this subject first came up, once again: Penises are not just for sex & peeing. It is only because man is evil that he thinks of penises exclusively in those terms.

Man is made in the image of God the Father. That is the primary reason why man has a penis.

You cannot insert your evil prejudicial ideas of man's penis onto God - which is exactly what you are doing. God's Penis is not equal to man's penis. It's really not hard to understand.

Pope Guilty
Nov 6, 2006

The human animal is a beautiful and terrible creature, capable of limitless compassion and unfathomable cruelty.
If God doesn't piss he is seriously missing out.

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
America lacks real men these days. The reprobate court system has brutally and relentlessly stripped fathers and husbands of their God-given authority. In fact, there's not a court room in the United States that recognizes a man's right to rule over his wife (Genesis 3:16). The courts force men into submission and give rebellious wives the upper-hand. In many cases, the judges presiding over Christian families are homosexuals, having lower morals than animals. How can there be any justice?

Tragically, the homosexual movement has flourished to the same extent as feminism in America. Parents are told to shut-up by their children. There is no respect for parental authority anymore. Women are portrayed as admirals, commanders and 5-star generals by Hollywood; but in reality they are helpless without men to guide them in such positions, which require a man's decisiveness, ruggedness and masculinity. The only exception are butches (women who have become men), losing all their femininity. Lesbianism is of the Devil. Lesbianism and masculine females are virtually synonymous, and not one of them loves the King James Bible, because it is authoritative and holy. The truth is that as America has descended into wickedness, the churches have followed afar off lock-in-step. The very idea of women wearing pants is repulsive to any God-fearing Christian who believes in old-fashioned decency, morality and good living. God hasn't changed. Let me say that again... GOD HASN'T CHANGED (Malachi 3:6).

CaptainSarcastic
Jul 6, 2013



One of the most controversial subjects in America's churches today is pants on women, but there is NO controversy if you believe the Bible. 1st Timothy 2:9 clearly instructs women to dress MODESTLY, i.e., of good behavior. A woman's clothing says MUCH about her moral character. It is unbiblical and a sin for women to dress immodestly, clothing themselves like the heathen world around us. It was the ungodly women's liberation movement of whores, kooks and feminists who through worldly magazines, hellivision and sensual women's clothing catalogs changed how women dress today. The average woman these days has no more class or femininity than a hermit crab.

chickie nugs for brekkie
May 17, 2010

quote:

End Times Prophecy Report

End Times Bible Prophecy and News, End Times Deception, Societal Collapse, Apostasy, False Christs, Prophets, Apostles & Teachers, Whore of Babylon Church, Opinion, Commentary & Bible Teaching, Demonic Power, War, Rumors of War, Famine, Pestilence, Salvation in Jesus Christ, NWO, UFOs, Earthquakes, IHOP, All Roads Lead to Rome, Counterfeit Christianity, New World Order, Conspiracies, Nephilim, Giants, New Apostolic Reformation, Heresies, Signs and Lying Wonders, Dominionism, End Times Sin & Corruption

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

Maybe it's referring to this IHOP.

Basically a bunch of fundies that go around exploiting human poverty, and trying to pass legislation that allows for the execution of gays in parts of Africa. (Namely Uganda)

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
I believe the institution of marriage started to be weakened when couples started living together outside of wedlock. Then the feminists told women they didn't need a man to raise children ... which weakened the family structure even more. Divorce has dealt another huge blow to the family structure. Now we have homosexuals adopting children, and if they legalize homosexual 'marriages' I'd say we can kiss the institute of marriage goodbye in America. Satan knows if he can destroy the very foundation of society ... family, he can destroy the Nation. He's getting it done.

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
There's a guy on these forums that thinks glasses and prosthetic arms are inventions of the devil because they make people more concerned with the material world instead of God.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

Volume posted:

I believe the institution of marriage started to be weakened when couples started living together outside of wedlock. Then the feminists told women they didn't need a man to raise children ... which weakened the family structure even more. Divorce has dealt another huge blow to the family structure. Now we have homosexuals adopting children, and if they legalize homosexual 'marriages' I'd say we can kiss the institute of marriage goodbye in America. Satan knows if he can destroy the very foundation of society ... family, he can destroy the Nation. He's getting it done.

Larry the cable guy is getting hosed up.

Fargin Icehole
Feb 19, 2011

Pet me.

Who What Now posted:

There's a guy on these forums that thinks glasses and prosthetic arms are inventions of the devil because they make people more concerned with the material world instead of God.

well he's a loving idiot

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
I predict a much higher conversion rate to Christianity for homosexual Atheists than for hetrosexual Atheists, starting in the near furture. The reasoning is simple: Homosexual Atheist are going to become aware much more easily that their sexuality is based on evil spirits than will the heterosexuals. God love us all, but the Holy Spirit will lead repentant homosexuals to a much higher spirituality, analogous to the parable of the Prodigal Son.

People everywhere, especially conservative Christians, are experiencing a low morale these days, and all the more so if Clinton is elected president, but they forget that God can bring good out of evil. No matter who is elected, things are going to be just fine because we are one nation under God, and He has not abandoned us.

3D Megadoodoo
Nov 25, 2010

dad gay. so what posted:

*pulls penis out of pants slowly*

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Kilo147 posted:

I dunno man, I don't think Jesus is into butt stuff.


Avenging_Mikon posted:

"Get thee behind me, Satan."

Dude was a taker.

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007



quote:

This books is packed with 42 entertaining clown skits based on biblical themes. Children love clowns and clowns love children--so what better way to show God's love and teach His gospel than through clowns? All the skits are based on Bible stories and teach Christian ethics and morals in a way that is fun and entertaining.

Both adults and children will enjoy seeing as well as participating in these creative skits. No memorization is needed. All of the skits are presented in a variety of pantomine and acitng situations with appropriate narration.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:


quote:

Clowns love Children
Holy poo poo :stare:

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007



Christian mime company

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YHUwZXnjAtc

Post poste
Mar 29, 2010
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/friendlyatheist/2016/05/16/creationist-ken-ham-goes-on-reason-rally-rant-on-twitter/

A twitter rant about how atheists worship stars.

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
The pastor of an Oregon Baptist church is under fire locally for putting what critics call a bigoted message on his church’s sign board, KATU reports.

Pastor Michael Harrington placed the words on the reader board outside Belmont Drive Missionary Baptist Church. On one side it reads, “Wake up Christians, Allah is not our God, Muhammad not greater than Jesus.” On the other side, it says, “Only the Bible is God’s word, ‘holy book,’ Koran is just another book.”

“I’m not politically correct. I’ve never been politically correct, but I think I’m biblically correct, and that’s what matters to me,” Harrington told KATU. “It isn’t against any particular denomination. It’s just the fact that I have taught and will continue to teach that I have one God, one way of salvation and one Bible that’s holy.”

But locals, including the mayor, don’t want to see the signs.

“I was really annoyed and sad,” Hood River mayor, Paul Blackburn, told KATU. “I am annoyed that in this political season there’s a solid case of ugly going on. I think it norms up this kind of behavior like ‘oh it’s okay to be a bigot now.'”

Another resident, Eric Cohn, said he was very upset.

“I literally had to stop and back up and make sure I saw what I saw, and I was profoundly offended and upset by it,” Cohn told KATU.

Harrington told the station he has no plans to remove the sign until the beginning of June, when he was planning to put a new one up anyway.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
Here is a question you.

So a light year = the distance light travels in a year.

You mentioned the figure 11 million light years away.

So my question is how are we observing this light 11 million light years away now?

I'm not 11 million years old, i'm 20.

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007

Mark loving Driscoll is back and answering a question about anorexia.

quote:

This is where Satan, demons are lying to you, tempting you. The Bible says that Satan is the accuser of the children of God. He accuses them day and night — in Revelation 12:10, there are accusations. If you start realizing this oppression, you can get out of it by acknowledging what God has to say. Oppression, often times, an accusation, is often in the second person, you are unlovable, you need to punish yourself, you don’t appear attractive, whatever the oppression is, it’s telling you something that’s just not true.

And so, what you need to understand is that’s demonic, that God doesn’t speak to you that way, and if you’re hearing in the second person, maybe someone is talking to you, a spiritual being is lying to you, and I’ll get to that in just a moment, and the way out is deliverance, you have victory in Christ, Colossians 2 says He has disarmed and defeated the powers and principalities of evil, triumphing over them through his victorious forgiveness of sinners on the cross.

http://www.patheos.com/blogs/warrenthrockmorton/2016/05/16/mark-driscoll-takes-on-anorexia-might-be-demonic/

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
A woman in Florida believes God has sent a message to her in a place she was sure to see it — her baby’s poopy diaper.

Katy Vasquez of Winter Park, says she was changing her son’s diaper on Monday when she noticed something strange: a poop stain in the shape of a cross.

“It might not be the prettiest sign, but he put it where he knew I’d see it,” she wrote on Facebook. “Hard to miss what’s right there in front of you.”


“I didn’t think much of it till I went to throw it away,” Vasquez told HuffPost. “I believe that when things are bad, as they have been, God will always find a way to let you know things will be okay.”

Soiled diapers are generally pretty gross, but people are going gaga for the crap-stained cross.

So far, Vasquez’ poopy post has been shared more than 5,000 times.

One woman described her reaction to the diaper photos like this: “Holy s***!!!”

As stinky as the diaper was, Vasquez has faith it’s a sign of better things ahead.

“I prayed to God for a sign that everything would be okay because we’ve been financially struggling,” she told HuffPost. “So, yeah, I do believe its a sign that somehow things will be okay.”

Vasquez tossed out the diaper, but took a photo, thus preserving it for poo-sterity.

UPDATE: This story has been updated to include Vasquez’s quotes.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014


Ramrod XTreme
holy poo poo

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007



:airquote:Homosexual Marriage:airquote:

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.
So called "officers" gainfully employed by the TSA! :bahgawd:

coolskull
Nov 11, 2007

flight got delayed, what to do...ooh, I'll follow this federal employee around taking "discreet" photos

Ride The Gravitron
May 2, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
i dont know about that, but giants have been scientifically and biblicaly proven, there used to be more oxygen which allowed life to grow much bigger, bones have been found

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Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007









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