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MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
Scheduled for February 2017 last I checked. Which probably means it'll actually be released in the early '20s at this rate.

MMAgCh fucked around with this message at 18:55 on Jun 4, 2016

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Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

I wrote amazon asking wtf when I didn't receive it in February 2014...

KramFoot
Sep 25, 2011
I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

SRM
Jul 10, 2009

~*FeElIn' AweS0mE*~


Real nice job having an editor there, BL marketing team.

Lovely Joe Stalin
Jun 12, 2007

Our Lovely Wang
You think that is bad? At Warhammerfest they were selling mugs. One of which has "I he" or something like that in the middle of a sentence printed on the mug.

Of course I went for the "A cup a day keeps the Nails at bay!" Khorne mug. Because I'm classy.

Arc Hammer
Mar 4, 2013

Got any deathsticks?

KramFoot posted:

I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

Congrats! Now I take it as long as you're in the process you're under an NDA to not talk about it, so don't tell us anything yet. But still, that's awesome.

KramFoot
Sep 25, 2011
Yeah pretty much under a NDA so won't risk it but still it's really exciting\bloody terrifying to think about.

Olanphonia
Jul 27, 2006

I'm open to suggestions~

KramFoot posted:

I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

Wow, congrats!

Shroud
May 11, 2009

KramFoot posted:

I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

Awesome, man. Congratulations!

mythicknight
Jan 28, 2009

my thick night

Just finished the first Eisenhorn book, now I find myself pouring over warhammer wikis for hours to better understand the organizational structure of the Imperium and how pieces of it fit together.

This is normal, right?

One Legged Cat
Aug 31, 2004

DAY I GOT COOKIE

mythicknight posted:

Just finished the first Eisenhorn book, now I find myself pouring over warhammer wikis for hours to better understand the organizational structure of the Imperium and how pieces of it fit together.

This is normal, right?

This is perfectly normal and part of a well-documented process.

You read Eisenhorn, then came back.

Arc Hammer
Mar 4, 2013

Got any deathsticks?
It's worth noting that Abnett has his own take on the Imperium. The primary feature is that he presents it as a mostly functioning government with seriously shady dealings, as opposed to a crumbling system that fails on every level through bureaucratic incompetence.

Angry Lobster
May 16, 2011

Served with honor
and some clarified butter.

KramFoot posted:

I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

Congratulations! Also, if by any chance you end up working for Black Library and meet with C.S Goto, please punch him in the face.

SRM
Jul 10, 2009

~*FeElIn' AweS0mE*~

Angry Lobster posted:

Congratulations! Also, if by any chance you end up working for Black Library and meet with C.S Goto, please punch him in the face.

I don't remember the last time C.S. Goto wrote a book for BL; after his treatment of the setting, I'd be surprised if he was allowed within 500 yards of GW HQ.

Khizan
Jul 30, 2013


Arcsquad12 posted:

It's worth noting that Abnett has his own take on the Imperium. The primary feature is that he presents it as a mostly functioning government with seriously shady dealings, as opposed to a crumbling system that fails on every level through bureaucratic incompetence.

The Imperium is so huge that I just say that in some areas it is mostly functional and in other areas it's crumbling and failing

Shbobdb
Dec 16, 2010

by Reene
Worrying about things like "consistancy" and "canon" in WH40K actively defeats the purpose of the setting.

The more seriously people take it, the worse it gets.

That doesn't mean you can't play it straight, I like it when the absurdity is played straight.

Shazaminator
Oct 11, 2007
The power of Shazam compels you!

SRM posted:



Real nice job having an editor there, BL marketing team.

This will be what, the third book focused around trying Vulkan being lost?

You think the Salamanders would just get him microchipped at this point given how often he goes walkies.

Abyss
Oct 29, 2011
Re Emperor's Gift: Holy poo poo, that Zael reveal had me audibly cry out in surprise. So good, I've missed ADB.

berzerkmonkey
Jul 23, 2003

Khizan posted:

The Imperium is so huge that I just say that in some areas it is mostly functional and in other areas it's crumbling and failing

I was just going to say this. On a micro (planetary/system) scale, a government could run smoothly and efficiently. The problem becomes when you're attempting to oversee millions of those micro governments.

Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

Abyss posted:

Re Emperor's Gift: Holy poo poo, that Zael reveal had me audibly cry out in surprise. So good, I've missed ADB.

That inquisitor that brought him gets around too. She also grabbed Agun Zoric.

TheArmorOfContempt
Nov 29, 2012

Did I ever tell you my favorite color was blue?
It is more that the Imperium is efficient at a few things, and conducting war is one of them. The corruption, total waste, and refusal to change just turn these into nightmare slogs of attrition with notable exceptions. Of course the everyday man and leaders have to competent at what they do because we are still talking about things like interstellar travel and spaceship constructing, the notion being that the people in question can follow instructions and fill in the gaps pretty well, just don't expect anything new from them, which doesn't matter when you realize nearly 99.9% of imagined Sci-fi technology exists in the 40k setting, so you just got to find it and put it to use.

Waroduce
Aug 5, 2008
Just saw Event Horizon for the first time thanks to netflix. Definitly humanities first contact with the warp, was amazing

berzerkmonkey
Jul 23, 2003

Waroduce posted:

Just saw Event Horizon for the first time thanks to netflix. Definitly humanities first contact with the warp, was amazing

Oh man, it took you this long? At least you finally saw this wonder of film. I originally saw it in the theater and was like "Oh my God, this is so 40K warp travel and Chaos..." Everyone I knew hated it or thought it was too weird, but I knew what it really was. Oh yes, I knew...

If you haven't seen it, watch In the Mouth of Madness and view the most perfect Lovecraftian movie ever made.

Khizan
Jul 30, 2013


Uroboros posted:

It is more that the Imperium is efficient at a few things, and conducting war is one of them. The corruption, total waste, and refusal to change just turn these into nightmare slogs of attrition with notable exceptions.

Uh, I think you are confusing efficient and effective here. The Imperium wages war very effectively, but it isn't efficient at all.

Deptfordx
Dec 23, 2013

KramFoot posted:

I got through the first round of Black Library's short story competition. Uhh I'm in shock here guys. Don't know how to process this really. Been told that my pitch has been accepted but it could still be a no but to wait for further instructions. Suffice to say if I do end up writing for BL I will have to give you fine fellows a mention somewhere in my short piece.

Whatever the story, you have to work a veteran sergeant Moola and his mighty Power Fist in there.

White Noise Marine
Apr 14, 2010

Deptfordx posted:

Whatever the story, you have to work a veteran sergeant Moola and his mighty Power Fisting in there.

Ftfy

KramFoot
Sep 25, 2011
Hmm challenge accepted. I was gonna go with giving a ship the latin translation of Something Awful buut you cant have a warham story without skulls and power fists.

KramFoot fucked around with this message at 15:44 on Jun 8, 2016

Demiurge4
Aug 10, 2011

What's Latin for 'Insert Generic Name Here'?

Edit: Nomen Genericum.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
If there's no servitor shoving someone down the stairs while augmitting "PAK CHOOIE UNF", you needn't even bother. :colbert:

berzerkmonkey
Jul 23, 2003

MMAgCh posted:

If there's no servitor shoving someone down the stairs while augmitting "PAK CHOOIE UNF", you needn't even bother. :colbert:

QUESTION: PLEASE TELL ME IN WHAT IMPERIAL SECTOR YOU LIVE SO I MAY -> I MAY COME AND HELP YOU

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady
DOES YOUR HAB-DOME CONTAIN STAIRS?

KramFoot
Sep 25, 2011
Okay so something awful translates into Formidolosa est. Huh. Think I might actually use that.
DO YOU HAVE STAIRS IN YOUR SECTOR?

Waroduce
Aug 5, 2008
I'm reading Space Marine by Ian Watson and its hilarious


quote:

Yet still, there was to be a branding upon the leather-tough buttocks: an imprint of a clenched fist,
no larger than a fingernail only. This was indeed to be an honour—for the sergeant himself
personally wielded the electro-iron when Lexandro, Yeremi, and Biff bent over to flex the great
gluteal muscles of their rumps.
Did he himself bear such a brand, hidden beneath his uniform?

quote:

As their striding Emperor quivered with the unleashing of its weaponry, Biff sat impotently for
only a few moments.
Rotating his power fist, he gave the finger to the Warlords: an adamantium finger bigger than
any armoured Marine.
He hoped some of the Fists might perhaps behold that gesture with joy.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you

Waroduce posted:

I'm reading Space Marine by Ian Watson and its hilarious
You know, given that it's been out of print for years I might actually pay $70 for a limited collector's hardcover edition of such magnificent prose. Chop chop, BL!

Gibfender
Apr 15, 2007

Electricity In Our Homes

MMAgCh posted:

You know, given that it's been out of print for years I might actually pay $70 for a limited collector's hardcover edition of such magnificent prose. Chop chop, BL!

$70!? You'd be lucky to get the eBook for that. This is BL we're talking here

berzerkmonkey
Jul 23, 2003

MMAgCh posted:

You know, given that it's been out of print for years I might actually pay $70 for a limited collector's hardcover edition of such magnificent prose. Chop chop, BL!

Ugh. If you're going to read that piece of garbage, at least be economical about it. Also, BL did do a POD version a few years back, but it looks like they've dropped that option.

MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
I was joking about the limited edition thing, although as a rule I don't buy used either. If they ever re-release it as a reasonably priced eBook (ha ha) I might grab it.

Waroduce
Aug 5, 2008

quote:

Tyranid Terror
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
“We’re going in through its anus,” Biff whooped boisterously. Indeed. Indeed.
What else could that puckered sphincter be, in the white bony hull of the vast, gastropoidal alien
vessel?
The leviathan that loomed ahead seemed a cross between a nautilus and an omnivorous, spacefaring
snail. It was the length of a four-K asteroid, and almost as high where its shell spiralled
upward in a circuit of increasingly small osseous chambers. The shell was bleached chalky by aeons
of radiation.
Even as the armoured Fists, tightly packed into a stretched boarding torpedo, stared at the
forward view-screen in its mount of bronze bones, that sphincter pulsed.
It expelled a quick milky cloud, which the torpedo’s sensors assayed as consisting of bitter
liquid dregs, foul gas, and ashy debris—the fart of a leviathan…
“We’re ramming in through its arse!” Indeed.
As were other Fist-packed torpedoes, aimed at other orifices where the alien hull might prove
vulnerable…
dildo of space marines right up the rear end

quote:

A coccyx of bleached bone jutted into space, bearing the sphincter at its tip like a quartet of
triangular haemorrhoids clutched within bands of livid muscle. Where the heads of these scarlet
protuberances touched, a tiny hole still puffed acidic discharge.
The nose of the torpedo impacted rupturingly in that meatus, wrenching its tissue open,
burrowing deeper convulsively with thrusts of its jets as the Fists clung to stanchions.
The torpedo rocked as a shaped charge on the nose cone erupted, blasting a passageway ahead.
Swiftly the spring-loaded cone itself petalled open, becoming a fourfold hatch pressing fiercely
against the inner anal walls in the manner of a surgical dilator.

Waroduce fucked around with this message at 02:03 on Jun 11, 2016

Angry Lobster
May 16, 2011

Served with honor
and some clarified butter.
Ian Watson really understands the setting.

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MMAgCh
Aug 15, 2001
I am the poet,
The prophet of the pit
Like a hollow-point bullet
Straight to the head
I never missed...you
The Lexicanum lists an ISBN for a 2013 eBook release, but that article is literally the only Google hit for the ISBN given. So close and yet so far. :sigh:

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