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Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

This is it. The most important panel of all time

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McCloud
Oct 27, 2005


What is the source of this?!

CzarChasm
Mar 14, 2009

I don't like it when you're watching me eat.
Plastic Man, Character of the year, 2016

I mean, really, what's Batman gonna do? Hit him? The dude's actually harder to kill than Superman.

hiddenriverninja
May 10, 2013

life is locomotion
keep moving
trust that you'll find your way

CzarChasm posted:

Plastic Man, Character of the year, 2016

I mean, really, what's Batman gonna do? Hit him? The dude's actually harder to kill than Superman.

Hey now, Batman is all about fates worse than death.

Uthor
Jul 9, 2006

Gummy Bear Heaven ... It's where I go when the world is too mean.

What does Plastic Man have to explain? Did he kill Lincoln again?

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)

hiddenriverninja posted:

Hey now, Batman is all about fates worse than death.

Eel O'Brien has already lived through being scattered at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean, in bits too small to combine, without going too crazy. Whatever Brucie has in store won't be all that.

What I want to know is why he was looking like Alucard in the first panel.

Mooseontheloose
May 13, 2003

The best part of this is it looks like Batman is kinda like, ok yah fair enough.

WickedHate
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

What I want to know is why he was looking like Alucard in the first panel.

Cosplay?

CzarChasm
Mar 14, 2009

I don't like it when you're watching me eat.
Well, thanks for the new AV.

Section Z
Oct 1, 2008

Wait, this is the Moon.
How did I even get here?

Pillbug
He was at a Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego convention.

Choco1980
Feb 22, 2013

I fell in love with a Video Nasty
Here I was guessing he was doing a Crimson Avenger costume.

Also yeah, that does make for a pretty nice av

SomeJazzyRat
Nov 2, 2012

Hmmm...

McCloud posted:

What is the source of this?!

Countdown to Mystery (2008) #3

WickedHate
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax

This might be the single most embarrassing superhero struggle I've ever seen in my life. Wasn't one of Johnny's solo enemies the [fireproof material] Man? That seems useful for fighting the Human Torch and no one else. I tell ya, Johnny was the real Aquaman of the Silver Age.

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)

Isn't that the first Human Torch? Who was a robot or something?

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Asbestos man was the villain in question.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

Isn't that the first Human Torch? Who was a robot or something?

No, that's Johnny, he frequently had solo adventures in Strange Tales before it became the Nick Fury/Doctor Strange book.

Ignite Memories
Feb 27, 2005

I can't believe it's already time for my biennial plantman link. My how the time flies.

Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
I've been listening to older episodes of the Fantasticast podcast, and they had a lot of fun with the Strange Tales Torch strips. One point they make about them, which I think is fair enough, is that a good Human Torch story is a good Fantastic Four story more often than not (and most of the best Torch solo strips were the ones which also featured Reed, Sue and Ben in supporting roles, and the Torch feature became a Ben/Johnny double-act in its last few months), so there isn't really much point in trying to push them as solo Torch stories, because Johnny didn't work as another Spider-Man, which is what they wanted.

Saoshyant
Oct 26, 2010

:hmmorks: :orks:


Wheat Loaf posted:

because Johnny didn't work as another Spider-Man, which is what they wanted.

I wonder why that is.



Oh.

WickedHate
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax
Marvel wanting a Johnny solo movie is the reason he was replaced by the robot in that one cartoon.

Saoshyant
Oct 26, 2010

:hmmorks: :orks:


Also, the incredible debut of M.O.D.A.A.K.



(Spider Gwen Annual 2016)

wyntyr
Mar 27, 2006

Saoshyant posted:

Also, the incredible debut of M.O.D.A.A.K.



(Spider Gwen Annual 2016)

Surely a MODOFoBuW or something would be better? (Mental organism designed only for building walls, true believers!)

purple death ray
Jul 28, 2007

me omw 2 steal ur girl

Mental Organism Designed to Eat Taco Bowls

poly and open-minded
Nov 22, 2006

In BOD we trust

WickedHate posted:

Marvel wanting a Johnny solo movie is the reason he was replaced by the robot in that one cartoon.

i thought it was because they didnt want kids lighting themselves on fire

WickedHate
Aug 1, 2013

by Lowtax

Arctic Baldwin posted:

i thought it was because they didnt want kids lighting themselves on fire

Nah, that's just a myth.

Saoshyant
Oct 26, 2010

:hmmorks: :orks:


Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

I love this because there is no crime you could commit where this is poetic justice.

purple death ray
Jul 28, 2007

me omw 2 steal ur girl

Skwirl posted:

I love this because there is no crime you could commit where this is poetic justice.

What if he grew people's bodies until they engulfed their head

Rohan Kishibe
Oct 29, 2011

Frankly, I don't like you
and I never have.

I watched Super the other night, and I loved how the glimpses you see of the Christian superhero comic is Fletcher Hanks art, I was impressed at such a deep pull. I was the only one of my friends who was enough of a loser to get the joke.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Travis343 posted:

What if he grew people's bodies until they engulfed their head

1) That's not technically a crime and 2) Stardust is the only person in that universe capable of doing that.

Edit 3) That's not the end of the punishment

Detective No. 27
Jun 7, 2006

Well, now we know what Cody Rhodes's role next season of Arrow.

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

Skwirl posted:

I love this because there is no crime you could commit where this is poetic justice.
He tried to kill all the heads of state of the world, or something.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Evil Mastermind posted:

He tried to kill all the heads of state of the world, or something.

I really need to get the collected edition because everytime I find out the context for these Fletcher Hanks cartoons they sound even crazier.

Evil Mastermind
Apr 28, 2008

Skwirl posted:

I really need to get the collected edition because everytime I find out the context for these Fletcher Hanks cartoons they sound even crazier.
One guy tried to become insanely wealthy by building a machine that reversed gravity. He and his goons chained themselves to the ground, then turned on the device so everyone else on earth was flung into space, leaving all their valuables behind.

Yeah.

GPTribefan
Jul 2, 2007
Something witty yet inspirational about the Cleveland Indians

Skwirl posted:

No, that's Johnny, he frequently had solo adventures in Strange Tales before it became the Nick Fury/Doctor Strange book.

So many panels from that run could be posted here... The insanely awful art when it became a Ben/Johnny book (Dick Ayers on pencils??) the incredibly lame villains the Torch faced (William Van Vile? The Acrobat? Paste Pot Pete? ), the Thing in a Beatles wig....Strange Tales might have been the worst book early Marvel published.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

GPTribefan posted:

So many panels from that run could be posted here... The insanely awful art when it became a Ben/Johnny book (Dick Ayers on pencils??) the incredibly lame villains the Torch faced (William Van Vile? The Acrobat? Paste Pot Pete? ), the Thing in a Beatles wig....Strange Tales might have been the worst book early Marvel published.

Paste Pot Pete was a legitimate villain for a good chunk of the initial Lee/Kirby run, mostly as part of the Frightful Four which included Medusa (yes, Black Bolt's wife, well ex-wife at this point, I think she's dating Johnny Storm right now if you want to bring this full circle). Don't joke about Paste Pot Pete, he'll seal up your mouth and nose holes and watch you suffocate.

Basically if Spider-Man's webs have any effect on the Human Torch, then Paste Pot Pete is also a legitimate threat.

Nessus
Dec 22, 2003

After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!



Paste Pot Pete seems to be like Aquaman in that his problem is not in his abilities but rather in his branding.

Opopanax
Aug 8, 2007

I HEX YE!!!


Nessus posted:

Paste Pot Pete seems to be like Aquaman in that his problem is not in his abilities but rather in his branding.

Trapster! :argh:

Say Nothing
Mar 5, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

Evil Mastermind posted:

One guy tried to become insanely wealthy by building a machine that reversed gravity. He and his goons chained themselves to the ground, then turned on the device so everyone else on earth was flung into space, leaving all their valuables behind.

Yeah.

It also turned the oceans into Fanta.

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Ghostlight
Sep 25, 2009

maybe for one second you can pause; try to step into another person's perspective, and understand that a watermelon is cursing me



Skwirl posted:

I really need to get the collected edition because everytime I find out the context for these Fletcher Hanks cartoons they sound even crazier.
They are really worth it. I think my favourite part is that most of the time Stardust doesn't even prevent the crimes/genocide - he just punishes people after the fact and sometimes remembers to use his powers to reverse them.

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