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From Earth posted:This article has some more examples from around the world, like this one: 'His tongue was probably in the position to block it completely' This unstoppable force can be blocked by the accidental position of your tongue in your mouth.
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Jul 26, 2016 14:03
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Work related freude: A coworker at the place I used to work at is getting fired today. I found this out from my former boss yesterday and he's not the type to lie about that, especially since I know the coworker in question. One of his jobs is to lock up and open up the place in the mornings and evenings so the other workers can get in. On Friday night, my boss tried calling him to check up on a few things but he didn't answer all night. This made the boss concerned since there was important stuff he needed the coworker to take care of before he left for the evening. Figuring that his work phone had died or something, the boss made an unannounced visit to the place to pick up some papers and to talk to the worker. When he arrived at the place, he decided to look around for the worker and after checking the entire building for him to no avail. Giving up, he decided to grab some papers from his office, but when he opened the door, he found something that he wasn't expecting. The coworker was in the boss's office, passed out on the floor. Turns out he'd been drinking on the job and decided that the office was the best place to take a nap in. The boss was not impressed, especially when the worker still had an hangover and no excuse for his actions. Right now, he's getting fired if he hasn't already for his brilliant stroke of genius. Rio related schadenfreude: You know that athlete who got robbed by the police? They came back and started harassing him at his apartment. http://www.newshub.co.nz/world/kiwis-in-rio-harrassed-by-alleged-kidnappers-again-2016072608#axzz4FRy72mLj
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Jul 26, 2016 14:42
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Speaking of work schadenfreude, we have a 20-year-old professional gamer (like he's on a Halo team and buys expensive clothes with his prize money) that got initially hired for an important office job...despite having zero experience outside of working as a Walgreen's clerk. I have no clue what the guy who hired him was thinking, and he did such an awful job that after 2 weeks he got taken off the desk and put in the shipping room; the idea was he would start from the bottom to learn all the aspects of the business (much like I did) before possibly returning to a desk and doing important customer service work. As he's a new hire, he's on a 90 day probationary period as a contractor before we make a decision to hire him as a full employee. We do this with all the new hires, as it makes us easy to let someone go if they immediately prove to be a bad worker or shuffle them around different schedules and locations as we try out their skill set and see what they're best suited for. The kid has been so loving salty over this. He thinks he did a great job in the 2 weeks he was loving up everything because he didn't know left from right, and 2 months later is continuing to whine about it. He's had a habit of refusing work that he finds "beneath" him, like printing and mailing students their qualification cards and certificates, and tried to refuse to move to another office until he was given a dual-monitor setup....and then tried to force our IT guy to give him a new keyboard because the one he was given didn't "feel right". He sucks up to the owners, but in private will shirk off duties and complain about not being moved up to more important work after a week or two of data entry, or try to talk other people into doing his work for him. The schadenfreude is that he's almost definitely going to be let go due to being so incredibly awful, but in the meantime we're using him for everything even vaguely unsavory. Today he's spending the day going to BJ's and buying supplies for two offices (he played baseball in high school, so he was deemed fit enough to carry everything off the shelves himself), last week he had to remove dead bugs from the fluorescent lights in the ceiling, and tomorrow he's going to be weed whacking. If he takes it all without pride and gets his ego in check, he might get to stick around. If not, nobody would care if he's gone except himself.
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Jul 26, 2016 15:13
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BJ's and whacking? What sort of dodgy company do you work for?
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Jul 26, 2016 19:33
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Stoatbringer posted:BJ's and whacking? What sort of dodgy company do you work for? 90 day contractor period. You know they treat employees with best intentions
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Jul 26, 2016 20:34
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Nicaden posted:Rio related schadenfreude: You know that athlete who got robbed by the police? They came back and started harassing him at his apartment. http://www.newshub.co.nz/world/kiwis-in-rio-harrassed-by-alleged-kidnappers-again-2016072608#axzz4FRy72mLj This is fractally bad. More news about the shitshow that is the construction of the athlete housing: https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2016/jul/25/rio-2016-olympic-officials-athletes-village-unfinished quote:The Australian team, which was due to be housed in building 23, is refusing to use the Athletes Village until leaks and other problems are resolved and the checks are done to its satisfaction. A lovely-constructed apartment which previously housed young, sex-mad partying athletes in a place they knew they'll never return to? I can't imagine why people aren't jumping at the chance to live there. Phanatic has a new favorite as of 20:40 on Jul 26, 2016 |
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Jul 26, 2016 20:36
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Phanatic posted:This is fractally bad. More news about the shitshow that is the construction of the athlete housing: Those buildings are going to be the seeds of the mega slums from Dredd.
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Jul 26, 2016 20:55
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Chichevache posted:Those buildings are going to be the seeds of the mega slums from Dredd. Pretty sure the favelas beat them to it by some decades. They even have Judges now: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pacifying_Police_Unit Phanatic has a new favorite as of 21:28 on Jul 26, 2016 |
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Jul 26, 2016 21:24
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Jul 26, 2016 22:25
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It's the color filter that really gets me
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Jul 26, 2016 23:12
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Nitrox posted:90 day contractor period. You know they treat employees with best intentions Others have thought the same thing. Then we had an incident where an employee was performing really badly and constantly giving wrong information to customers (who then called back angry that the stuff this girl promised wasn't being delivered on, like different pricing), but her 90 day period passed before any decision to fire her was finalized. In order to cover our bases, we had to officially give her a performance counseling and then make an official decision to let her go with a severance bonus after she created months' worth of headaches to fix. And then after signing the paper agreeing to her severance pay, she suddenly rescinded her signature right on the deadline to do so and currently has paralegals constantly calling to demand a hold on our decision for negotiation (not an actual lawsuit yet, as she'd need to pony up more serious cash to have us served, but she's halfway there). I'm 99% certain that this guy would try to pull the exact same stunt if we lacked the right to let him go without risk, but it's not like he'd be let go if he wasn't a dick. We've never once fired anybody due to a lack of space or money to pay them and have only ever fired 3 or 4 people in the past 29 years. chitoryu12 has a new favorite as of 00:18 on Jul 27, 2016 |
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Jul 27, 2016 00:16
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Welp, I stand corrected. My apologies, Stan Taylor. Weatherman has a new favorite as of 00:36 on Jul 27, 2016 |
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Jul 27, 2016 00:31
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Jul 27, 2016 00:40
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Jul 27, 2016 01:13
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All this is missing is the "If you can read this, the bitch fell off" t-shirt.
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Jul 27, 2016 02:10
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Doesn't even slow down 
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Jul 27, 2016 02:56
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Jul 27, 2016 05:44
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Nicaden posted:Work related freude: A coworker at the place I used to work at is getting fired today. I found this out from my former boss yesterday and he's not the type to lie about that, especially since I know the coworker in question. A bit of work schadenfreude: there was this woman at one of my last jobs who was completely nuts. She did a lot of the accounting and when I first hired in had to deal with her. She didn't care for me one bit and made it known, and two years into the job I'd taken over most of her responsibilities. Since she was friends with our manager, she was basically kept on to do random poo poo. Anyway, we figure out that she's staying really late some nights and hovering about in the break room. Finally, she claims that this is an invasion of her privacy, and gives her two weeks notice. New job? Nope, she's building a tiny house and traveling across the nation, writing about it in her blog. Everybody is supportive but in the two weeks people keep asking her questions and she has no answers. Basic questions like 'how are you going to afford gas,' 'how are you going to haul your tiny house,' and 'how will you live?' Finally, we figure something really strange is going on. Turns out she wasn't building a tiny house to travel the nation. No, she was going to go into phone porn. She had been doing it as an aside for a while and decided that was her calling. The schadenfreude isn't about the phone porn, that's what she wanted to do. The schaden comes from us finding it out from her farewell email to the entire company where she gave her personal email address, phone number, and URL to her normal everyday blog (basically https://www.hername.com) which had just been converted over to boasting about 'escaping that drat job' and noting her fetishes, phone rates, chat URL to get started, and various other things. To the entire organization. The funniest bit is when one of the older guys who was working there clicked on it out of curiosity and ended up shrieking out loud after hours. Added bonus? This was a place that did computer and networking work. Maybe it was her fetish? No idea, but I don't think anybody from the job kept in contact with her.
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Jul 27, 2016 06:26
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Crossposting from gbs nice guy thread https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw-ID3eMcEw&index=1&list=PLpNAl5zLZSMUcMfsUrHFGR_avA6Jql2bl this poo poo is amazing
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Jul 27, 2016 06:37
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chitoryu12 posted:Others have thought the same thing. Then we had an incident where an employee was performing really badly and constantly giving wrong information to customers (who then called back angry that the stuff this girl promised wasn't being delivered on, like different pricing), but her 90 day period passed before any decision to fire her was finalized. In order to cover our bases, we had to officially give her a performance counseling and then make an official decision to let her go with a severance bonus after she created months' worth of headaches to fix. The Schadenfreude is that the person who hired them is presumably still working for your company, and you have horrible Managers, HR policies, procedures and people I guess?
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Jul 27, 2016 08:33
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Elfgames posted:Crossposting from gbs nice guy thread https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw-ID3eMcEw&index=1&list=PLpNAl5zLZSMUcMfsUrHFGR_avA6Jql2bl this poo poo is amazing Stupid fuckin hamster face!
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Jul 27, 2016 11:27
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From Earth posted:So, what happens when this undefeated Kiai master goes up against a real, actual, not-fake, highly trained MMA fighter? "Cameras disrupt my chi" - that guy, probably
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Jul 27, 2016 14:53
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http://i.imgur.com/5VrFZhT.gifv
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Jul 27, 2016 15:10
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She's doing the Lord's work.
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Jul 27, 2016 15:21
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Darkhold posted:tl:dr rear end in a top hat charged 80k to cleanup his trash and everyone is now fighting an army of flies. He just came in today and was complaining because the fines are now over £120,000 and they're trying to force him to sell his other business to pay for it. He was saying stuff like 'they're just going after me because I'm an easy target' 'Why are they wasting time with this when there's murders out there' and talking about how hard and mean the police were to him. He also found time to complain about the prices we were giving him on some stuff he was selling to us. I think wanting £150 for stuff that's worth less than £120 is the least of your problems right now bud.
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Jul 27, 2016 16:17
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Jul 27, 2016 16:22
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I can't even figure out what food they're trying to take a picture of
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Jul 27, 2016 16:27
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Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:I can't even figure out what food they're trying to take a picture of I thought it was ramen, but then thought, "No, these are basic white girls" So probably some yogurt thing
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Jul 27, 2016 16:30
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ElGroucho posted:I thought it was ramen, but then thought, "No, these are basic white girls" It is ramen. Have you ever met a basic white girl? They love paying $17 dollars/bowl for ramen.
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Jul 27, 2016 16:40
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Nah, looks more like acai bowls
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Jul 27, 2016 17:02
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Spectral Debt posted:Nah, looks more like acai bowls Ah, that makes sense. Looked too creamy to be ramen. Plus too much red goop.
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Jul 27, 2016 17:59
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I have a new crush.
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Jul 27, 2016 18:06
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Phanatic posted:This is fractally bad. More news about the shitshow that is the construction of the athlete housing: The irony is that athlete dorms have probably the best return on investment for Olympic cities. It's the only thing that you can easily convert into something else that people still want to use. We're tearing down our Olympic stadium next year, but the athlete housing became student dorms and will probably last another 20 years.
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Jul 27, 2016 18:34
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Krispy Kareem posted:The irony is that athlete dorms have probably the best return on investment for Olympic cities. It's the only thing that you can easily convert into something else that people still want to use. We're tearing down our Olympic stadium next year, but the athlete housing became student dorms and will probably last another 20 years. You're putting way too much trust in the skills of people who have so far turned the Olympics into a Rio dumpster fire. Considering all the other problems they've had, "construction" is not high on my list of "things contactors in Rio do well".
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Jul 27, 2016 20:12
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 E: god drat it imgur is making convenient hosting/posting really loving hard
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Jul 27, 2016 21:05
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Mak0rz posted:
I told them dinosaurs had feathers
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Jul 27, 2016 21:14
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Elfgames posted:Crossposting from gbs nice guy thread https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw-ID3eMcEw&index=1&list=PLpNAl5zLZSMUcMfsUrHFGR_avA6Jql2bl this poo poo is amazing What the gently caress did I just watch?
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Jul 27, 2016 21:18
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http://i.imgur.com/GSe3yhO.mp4
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Jul 27, 2016 21:21
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MariusLecter posted:What the gently caress did I just watch? Either a very dedictated troll or a very dense stalker getting milked by his target's friend.
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Jul 27, 2016 21:22
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Come to think of it, I'm surprised I haven't seen a single video of a (non-redneck) diving board snap mid-jump
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Jul 27, 2016 21:25
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