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Two Free Toppings
Jul 1, 2007

SUCK
THE
SHIT
OUT
OF
MY
OWN
ASSHOLE
Uh handball is super cool.

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shadow puppet of a
Jan 10, 2007

NO TENGO SCORPIO


ddiddles posted:

I watched some handball. What is this game, it's like they took the worst parts of basketball, soccer and lacrosse and shoved it into an incredibly boring sport. Somehow even more boring than the three listed.

I don't know how that sport does not fold from embarrassment. All those big jumpy 'deke' moves and fakeouts done with such serious faces with such a goofy goal setup that looks foolish to anyone not de-sensitized to it.

Takes No Damage
Nov 20, 2004

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.


Grimey Drawer
Hey the forums are back. Watching Brazil V Argentina in women's volleyball; the announcer makes it sound like some Israel/Palestine grudge match. ARG putting up a good fight but 66% of Brazil's team won the gold in 2012 so they're not favored. Two of their spikers are like the Venus and Serena of vball.

Virigoth
Apr 28, 2009

Corona rules everything around me
C.R.E.A.M. get the virus
In the ICU y'all......



The ioc ddosed us!!!!

CynCyanide
Mar 21, 2005

dance, water, dance!
The little red shorts the men's gymnastics team dudes are wearing for the floor exercise are giving me such a Mr Peepers flashback.

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

ddiddles posted:

I watched some handball. What is this game, it's like they took the worst parts of basketball, soccer and lacrosse and shoved it into an incredibly boring sport. Somehow even more boring than the three listed.

I thought this was a made up name like in that Tim and Eric "Sports" video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7u9hP4r1S8

WTF!?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Handball

Say Nothing
Mar 5, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
http://i.imgur.com/s0Q5t3D.mp4

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007

Say Nothing posted:

You know, events have been unfolding in a bizarrely un-chaotic fashion so far.
I'm surprised.
except for the serbian who capsized in his kayak, it's been fairly uneventful in terms of the actual games and events. but there have been plenty of things that happened to athletes and press outside the games

Fanatic
Mar 9, 2006

:eyepop:
lol at Americans not knowing what Handball is :ughh:

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit
Handegg

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Y-Hat posted:

yeah don't post a link or anything, idiot
Well, the Russian news site didn't link to the Spanish newspaper they referred to.

Here's Daily Male
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...-road-race.html

Gradis
Feb 27, 2016

GAPE APE

thats rugby

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
Whoever predicted that the velodrome was going to be a murder machine was....CORRECT!

https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2016/aug/08/australia-cyclist-hospital-crash-melissa-hoskins-team-pursuit

The Australian cyclist Melissa Hoskins has been cleared of serious injury after her pursuit team crashed while doing a training effort at race speed.

Hoskins was taken from the Rio Olympics velodrome on a stretcher on Monday but she was later released from hospital, the ABC reported.

The team of Hoskins, Ashlee Ankudinoff, Georgia Baker, Amy Cure and Annette Edmondson were at the end of the back straight when the crash occurred. Edmondson stayed on her bike as the other riders fell hard on to the banked wooden surface.

....

Some riders who practised on the $56 million Olympic velodrome have complained of the wood surface, which was delayed several times during installation and only recently opened for competition.

“At first it looks very fast but now I think it is not very fast at all,” the German sprinter René Enders said. “After training on it the boards have a lot of grip and the wood is soft. It’s a difficult track to race on because the wood is new and a little bit damp. It will get faster, in a few years, but not during these Games. It’s OK because it is the same for everybody.”

The velodrome hungers for more victims.

Fanatic
Mar 9, 2006

:eyepop:
The only solution is to tear up the wood, converting it into a Hippodrome and race chariots instead :hist101:

Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"
Australia vs Switzerland women's volleyball now on the Australian Channel 7 main stream. Everyone is a winner.

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

Fanatic posted:

lol at Americans not knowing what Handball is :ughh:

I'm not familiar with the quaint customs of your third world country

Neddy Seagoon
Oct 12, 2012

"Hi Everybody!"
Wow that match between Australia and Switzerland was close as hell. Really could've gone either way until that final fumble.

Philosopher King
Oct 25, 2006

Holy poo poo.

Full Metal Jackass
Jan 22, 2001

Rabid bats are welcome in my home

Hory poo poo.

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

PISSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois
Hi I'm not reading all these pages I'm just here to post this so if it's img-timeline oh well suck a gently caress
https://twitter.com/Tansimnews/status/762684679161978880
thank you

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe
hahahahahahahah

Vakal
May 11, 2008
That's a kinky ankle bracelet.

Macasaurus
Oct 12, 2012

no poo poo! :mad:

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule



?

Yes, yes he can:

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

Al Cowens posted:

Hi I'm not reading all these pages I'm just here to post this so if it's img-timeline oh well suck a gently caress
https://twitter.com/Tansimnews/status/762684679161978880
thank you

Woah, didn't realize how kinky the Olympics actually was :pervert:

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois

Wamdoodle posted:

Woah, didn't realize how kinky the Olympics actually was :pervert:
google image search 裸にみえる or "bubbling"

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule


I like to think all the horse names on the lower third titlecards are infact the riders nickname.

get that OUT of my face
Feb 10, 2007

Lime Tonics posted:

Whoever predicted that the velodrome was going to be a murder machine was....CORRECT!
welp i guess i spoke too soon about nothing actually happening at the games themselves

Al Cowens posted:

Hi I'm not reading all these pages I'm just here to post this so if it's img-timeline oh well suck a gently caress
https://twitter.com/Tansimnews/status/762684679161978880
thank you
not as impressive of a sports censorship job as this video from the 2010 world cup, but nothing is

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VaBOZspv9m4

Saga
Aug 17, 2009

Hogge Wild posted:

oh my the women's rugby

So much good rugby from the top 5 or 6 teams but the BBC were still covering shooting instead, WTF. If I want to see a balding pudgy dude with a shotgun, Hot Fuzz is on television at least once a week

USA - France was good (why are the French so loving angry at all the other teams?) and the final was loving brilliant. Even the celebrations were entertaining - the all blacks doing their super serious haka poo poo complete with tears and mascara running everywhere like it's goth night and this one Australian player is like yiss I got this awesome inflatable boxing kangaroo.

kemikalkadet
Sep 16, 2012

:woof:

Y-Hat posted:

welp i guess i spoke too soon about nothing actually happening at the games themselves



Don't forget about the deathslope in the cycling road race that claimed three medal contenders in the mens race and made the leader of the womens race break her spine in three places.

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois

Y-Hat posted:

welp i guess i spoke too soon about nothing actually happening at the games themselves

not as impressive of a sports censorship job as this video from the 2010 world cup, but nothing is

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VaBOZspv9m4
lmao

Murray Mantoinette
Jun 11, 2005

THE  POSTS  MUST  FLOW
Clapping Larry

Al Cowens posted:

google image search 裸にみえる or "bubbling"

idgi this isn't sexy at all

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
Want to eat at the olympics?

Good luck with that,

"Aside from numerous instances of insufficient stocking, most of the ire has been attributed to massive lines and an organizational system that requires Olympic-goers to pay for their food or beverage with a caixa (cashier) and then enter a completely separate line to acquire the food they paid for. In the case of spectators watching the USA v. China Basketball on Saturday, they were actually required to stand in three separate lines, thanks to broken ticket printers. The system doesn’t take into account changes in an order or the vendors running out of your ordered item before you actually reach them."

The game’s organizers have already issued an apology to spectators, who may have missed part of the action thanks to long lines on the first day. “We are fully aware of the problem and frustration. We requested that the relevant authorities increase the speed and effectiveness with which people could enter the park by ensuring that more employees work on the X-ray machines. Following improvements, the lines are now back to normal. We appreciate the patience and understanding shown by fans.”

That statement was echoed by Communications Director Mario Andrada, who told press during a conference Sunday morning that they were adding 100 extra staff to aid the logistics team.

That might not have worked out so well, considering the first transportation app ever created for the Olympic Games crashed that same day and countless workers and volunteers were left to navigate and figure out the schedule for themselves.

https://munchies.vice.com/en/articles/the-olympics-food-and-drink-situation-is-a-complete-and-utter-mess

Dude got drunk and got kicked out,

Gymnasts behaving badly: Netherlands’ Yuri van Gelder expelled from Olympics

33-year-old van Gelder left the Olympic Village on Saturday night and when didn’t return until Sunday, when he admitted to consuming alcohol. Both are against his team’s code of conduct, and on Monday the Dutch Olympic Committe announced that he’s been expelled from the Rio Games.

http://kxan.com/2016/08/08/gymnasts-behaving-badly-netherlands-yuri-van-gelder-expelled-from-olympics/

edit : fan fight at a tennis match,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3hbUNMPGWc&feature=youtu.be

Murray Mantoinette
Jun 11, 2005

THE  POSTS  MUST  FLOW
Clapping Larry

Lime Tonics posted:

33-year-old van Gelder left the Olympic Village on Saturday night and when didn’t return until Sunday, when he admitted to consuming alcohol. Both are against his team’s code of conduct, and on Monday the Dutch Olympic Committe announced that he’s been expelled from the Rio Games.

Yes obviously he should have known, as a Dutch person, how frowned upon alcohol consumption is.

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Lime Tonics posted:

an organizational system that requires Olympic-goers to pay for their food or beverage with a caixa (cashier) and then enter a completely separate line to acquire the food they paid for.
Ah, the Soviet shopping experience. Next they'll report their diners take lunch breaks at the same time as everyone else.

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
http://www.abplive.in/sports/day-3-best-pictures-from-rio-olympics-394907#image1

day 3 in pictures.

thoughts and prayers
Apr 22, 2013

Love heals all wounds. We hope you continually carry love in your heart. Today and always, may loving memories bring you peace, comfort, and strength. We sympathize with the family of (Name). We shall never forget you in our prayers and thoughts. I am at a loss for words during this sorrowful time.

Al Cowens posted:

Hi I'm not reading all these pages I'm just here to post this so if it's img-timeline oh well suck a gently caress
https://twitter.com/Tansimnews/status/762684679161978880
thank you

Did you see the replies?

https://twitter.com/UsamaBenjiLadin/status/762722552296931329

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013

by R. Guyovich

Lime Tonics posted:

Want to eat at the olympics?

Good luck with that,

"Aside from numerous instances of insufficient stocking, most of the ire has been attributed to massive lines and an organizational system that requires Olympic-goers to pay for their food or beverage with a caixa (cashier) and then enter a completely separate line to acquire the food they paid for.

This loving bullshit is the worst. I went to see Neil Young in Amsterdam a couple months back, they had the same sort of system for beverages. You had to pay for "tokens" and could only buy them in fixed amounts, so unless you were getting like six beers you'd end up with leftover tokens aka wasted money. It's like a cam site except on those you can at least tip your remaining tokens and they might flash you a titty. I tried throwing mine up at the stage but Neil must have not noticed because his shirt stayed on and there was practically no fingering throughout the show.

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Takes No Damage
Nov 20, 2004

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.


Grimey Drawer

If they're going to have fencing on the holodeck they should at least turn it on so they fight on the deck of a pirate ship or something :rolleyes:

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