Football Photos and Videos that are cool and good

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Ray Parlour > Football Photos and Videos that are cool and good

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what do you like best This poll is closed.
pics	69	0.39%
vids	420	2.40%
gazza.txt	8008	45.77%
havin yer mam	9001	51.44%
Total:	17498 votes

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pik_d: Feb 24, 2006; follow the white dove

TRP Post of the Month October 2021

# ? Aug 14, 2016 17:40

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 16, 2024 23:37

ayb: Sep 12, 2003; Kills Drifters for erections

pik_d posted:

fantastic reverse

# ? Aug 14, 2016 17:54

Pand: Apr 1, 2011; Jogi Maldito

pik_d posted:

lol

# ? Aug 14, 2016 19:55

TheBigAristotle: Feb 8, 2007; I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.; Grimey Drawer

pik_d posted:

# ? Aug 14, 2016 20:31

trem_two: Oct 22, 2002; it is better if you keep saying I'm fat, as I will continue to score goals; Fun Shoe

https://twitter.com/TotalMLS/status/764984661776924672

# ? Aug 15, 2016 01:59

qsvui: Aug 23, 2003; some crazy thing

not not luvd posted:

the comments are amazing

V VFL 15 hours ago
i loving hate these retarded accents

# ? Aug 15, 2016 05:28

goddamnedtwisto: Dec 31, 2004; If you ask me about the mole people in the London Underground, I WILL be forced to kill you; Fun Shoe

ephex posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ItBKNRLydw

wrong thread?

i don't understand why you'd post this video of perfectly normal Mancunian behaviour.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 07:11

African AIDS cum: Feb 29, 2012; Welcome back, welcome back, welcome baaaack

ephex posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ItBKNRLydw

wrong thread?

Lol i used to watch this all the time 10 years ago and loved the mancs the most cant believe they still do it

# ? Aug 15, 2016 09:11

Frankston: Jul 27, 2010

Dalian Atkinson formerly of Aston Villa died after being tasered by police last night so I'm going to post this loving awesome goal he scored for us

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9E9FDiUTp30

# ? Aug 15, 2016 11:45

paddyboat: Feb 20, 2013; Maxi, Maxi Rodriguez
Run down the wing for me

That is a loving awesome goal. RIP

# ? Aug 15, 2016 12:12

Hoops: Aug 19, 2005; A Black Mark For Retarded Posting

Frankston posted:

Dalian Atkinson formerly of Aston Villa died after being tasered by police last night so I'm going to post this loving awesome goal he scored for us

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9E9FDiUTp30

I don't remember him as a player at all, but out of respect I will happily say that that goal was loving ace.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 12:43

kippa: Aug 10, 2005; Fry, it's been three days. You can't keep boogie-ing like this. You'll come down with a fever of some sort.

Fun fact: Karren Brady once asked Ron Atkinson if Dalien was his son.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 12:50

jesus WEP: Oct 17, 2004

kippa posted:

Fun fact: Karren Brady once asked Ron Atkinson if Dalien was his son.

I wonder what words he used in his reply

Also :rip:

, you stopped Man U doing the domestic treble in 94 and it was great

# ? Aug 15, 2016 13:21

Strawman: Feb 9, 2008; Tortuga means turtle, and that's me. I take my time but I always win.

trem_two posted:

https://twitter.com/TotalMLS/status/764984661776924672

Randy ‏@RandyKaiserSD
@TotalMLS can i get a clarification on the rule for this situation?

Brian Ebert ‏@briebert
@RandyKaiserSD @TotalMLS Yeah, if you're a keeper, make sure you don't pass it directly to the other team.

Randy ‏@RandyKaiserSD
@briebert @TotalMLS that's not the rule that's called logic. I want the rule smart rear end.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 17:44

Vegetable: Oct 22, 2010

tbf that's probably an illegal goal

# ? Aug 15, 2016 18:52

belgend: Mar 6, 2008; me when The Club do another win

Vegetable posted:

tbf that's probably an illegal goal

There's precedent

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMd1EJi_udc

when you don't take a goal kick and you drop the ball it's anyone's game basically

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:18

Vegetable: Oct 22, 2010

"If the ball does not leave the penalty area or is touched by a player before it leaves the penalty area the kick is retaken."

and

"If an opponent who is in the penalty area when the goal kick is taken touches or challenges for the ball before it has touched another player, the goal kick is retaken."

http://www.thefa.com/football-rules-governance/laws/football-11-11/law-16---the-goal-kick#YBuY2X7s9y5Bwoym.99

Too lazy to look for the official FIFA handbook, but goals like that are pretty obviously illegal

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:40

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

Vegetable posted:

"If the ball does not leave the penalty area or is touched by a player before it leaves the penalty area the kick is retaken."

and

"If an opponent who is in the penalty area when the goal kick is taken touches or challenges for the ball before it has touched another player, the goal kick is retaken."

http://www.thefa.com/football-rules-governance/laws/football-11-11/law-16---the-goal-kick#YBuY2X7s9y5Bwoym.99

Too lazy to look for the official FIFA handbook, but goals like that are pretty obviously illegal

those aren't goal kicks Vegetable, when the ball is in the hands of the goalkeeper from open play, it's open play. just with some rules now about how long the keeper can hold onto it, used to be four steps ( with no time limit) and now it's six seconds or whatever.

the ball is basically only protected when the keeper has both hands on it and is on control.

technically if the goalkeeper walks with the ball in the palm of one hand an attacking player could heat it off his hand.

the goalkeeper in these instances put the ball on the floor either to roll it or two take it with his feet, these attacking players did absolutely nothing wrong and it is all legal within the rules of the game.

JFairfax fucked around with this message at 21:49 on Aug 15, 2016

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:46

belgend: Mar 6, 2008; me when The Club do another win

Yeah but play hasn't stopped in either of those examples. So those two sentences don't matter.

Where are the ref goons when you need them

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:48

Vegetable: Oct 22, 2010

I was dumb and stupid, didn't bother rewatching the GIF to verify the situation. Appreciate the correction.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:49

Tigren: Oct 3, 2003

Vegetable posted:

"If the ball does not leave the penalty area or is touched by a player before it leaves the penalty area the kick is retaken."

and

"If an opponent who is in the penalty area when the goal kick is taken touches or challenges for the ball before it has touched another player, the goal kick is retaken."

http://www.thefa.com/football-rules-governance/laws/football-11-11/law-16---the-goal-kick#YBuY2X7s9y5Bwoym.99

Too lazy to look for the official FIFA handbook, but goals like that are pretty obviously illegal

This wasn't a goal kick though.

Law 12 posted:

A goalkeeper cannot be challenged by an opponent when in control of the ball with the hands.
A goalkeeper is considered to be in control of the ball when:

the ball is between the hands or between the hand and any surface (e.g.
ground, own body) or by touching it with any part of the hands or arms
except if the ball rebounds accidentally from the goalkeeper or the
goalkeeper has made a save

holding the ball in the outstretched open hand

bouncing it on the ground or throwing it in the air

MLS has given cards for this before and set precedent.

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:50

Weaponized Cum: Aug 31, 2004; This post brought to you by the finest Miami cocaine money can buy ----->

Ban everyone on this page ffs

# ? Aug 15, 2016 21:53

paddyboat: Feb 20, 2013; Maxi, Maxi Rodriguez
Run down the wing for me

Here's an awesome goal by Jozy Altidore to cheer you up.

https://twitter.com/torontofc/status/765202847596240896

# ? Aug 16, 2016 00:03

Paperhouse: Dec 31, 2008; I think
your hair
looks much
better
pushed
over to
one side

Jozy loves scoring like a fat kid loves eating cake

# ? Aug 16, 2016 01:31

vyelkin: Jan 2, 2011

Paperhouse posted:

Jozy loves scoring like a fat kid loves eating cake

I can confirm this

# ? Aug 16, 2016 02:32

dex_sda: Oct 11, 2012

Tigren posted:

MLS has given cards for this before and set precedent.

He's not 'controlling' the ball when he releases it you weirdo

# ? Aug 16, 2016 09:26

Frankston: Jul 27, 2010

Somebody made a Subbuteo tribute for Dalian Atkinson, I think this is cool

https://twitter.com/SubbuteoArt/status/765186014499467264

# ? Aug 16, 2016 13:25

Twat le Piss: Aug 4, 2004; Grimey Drawer

Frankston posted:

Somebody made a Subbuteo tribute for Dalian Atkinson, I think this is cool

https://twitter.com/SubbuteoArt/status/765186014499467264

the umbrella should be upside down

# ? Aug 16, 2016 13:33

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Aug 16, 2016 21:21

blue footed boobie: Sep 14, 2012; UEFA SUPREMACY

Batshuayi is a good lad who knows about showing your cock

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:05

TheBigAristotle: Feb 8, 2007; I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.; Grimey Drawer

Frankston posted:

Somebody made a Subbuteo tribute for Dalian Atkinson, I think this is cool

https://twitter.com/SubbuteoArt/status/765186014499467264

When it rains, it pours. Click here to see Villa now

https://vine.co/v/5hE2XtvxXnO

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:05

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

blue footed boobie posted:

Batshuayi is a good lad who knows about showing your cock

lol what

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:05

blue footed boobie: Sep 14, 2012; UEFA SUPREMACY

JFairfax posted:

lol what

It's real, but that's all the context I have.

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:07

Bogan Krkic: Oct 31, 2010; Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

blue footed boobie posted:

Batshuayi is a good lad who knows about showing your cock

lmao

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:09

Simone Poodoin: Jun 26, 2003; Che storia figata, ragazzo!

https://twitter.com/eastern_gooner/status/765631892100157444

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:10

Lamont Cranston: Sep 1, 2006; how do i shot foam

dex_sda posted:

He's not 'controlling' the ball when he releases it you weirdo

Law 12 posted:

An indirect free kick is awarded if a player:
[...]
� prevents the goalkeeper from releasing the ball from the hands or kicks or attempts to kick the ball when the goalkeeper is in the process of releasing it

in this case the question i guess would be whether the ball was still in the process of being released or not. I'm not sure I've ever seen any guidance from FIFA etc on that so who knows

# ? Aug 16, 2016 22:39

Ewar Woowar: Feb 25, 2007

blue footed boobie posted:

Batshuayi is a good lad who knows about showing your cock

Batshuayi is no Robert Huth

# ? Aug 16, 2016 23:17

TheBigAristotle: Feb 8, 2007; I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.; Grimey Drawer

Every lineup and formation from CL winners 1993-Present. I thought it was cool.