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quote:I am a member of a childfree community, but secretly I desperately want to have children. My cousin went through a difficult battle with infertility very publicly and the idea of people knowing I can't have kids is humiliating to me. So I put on a persona in real life and online of a person who vehemently opposes having children and working towards more child free spaces. But deep down I desperately wish I could conceive and I am very jealous of other women that can. It made it easier to hate stuff like baby showers, mommy blogs and the like. quote:To all the other whorefuckers, you're all fooling yourselves. The people in power don't want any of it to be 'legit' and terms like 'hobbyist' and 'sex worker' are a load of bullshit. Whores aren't any better or worse than John's either so clutching pearls about whorefuckers is stupid.
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Aug 16, 2016 20:58
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quote:A couple years ago I found some very explicit child pornography on my brother's laptop. Hundreds of pictures and several videos. I confronted him with it and he freaked out and started begging me not to turn him in, he's just sick he'd never hurt a child etc. I wasn't buying it, but eventually he offered to pay me 10000 dollars. I was hard up for money at the time so regretfully I accepted and kept quiet. A few times since I have gotten a thousand or two here and there when I needed it. quote:I am facing major disciplinary action at work soon, quite possibly being fired. All because my "I'm around a bunch of liberals" filter momentarily shut off thanks to being extremely hungover. I've been somewhat of a "rising star" in my field for the past 12 years and was well on my way to getting tenure. We (the professors of the department) were discussing with the department chair the incoming class of grad students. Every one of them was chinese, indian, or black. I have long been frustrated by this practice and do anything I can to avoid working with/supervising these students.
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Aug 16, 2016 20:59
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everyone cares, dude
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Aug 16, 2016 21:04
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time-traveling goon: welcome to 2016, where you can't call graduate students racial slurs
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Aug 16, 2016 21:05
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professor goon you've spent too much time reading the china.jpg threads and took it out on the wrong students
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Aug 16, 2016 21:05
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I'd kill for even a chance at tenure somewhere, I don't know how you could be that careless. Even if you're in the backwaterest part of the south I'd imagine dropping a hard N verbally is at least partially frowned upon by some people, I don't care how hung over you are, you should know that.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:07
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Yeah uh racist professor goon I think it's less that you're getting fired for saying a word or "wrongthink" and more that you're getting fired because you proved that you cannot be trusted to treat your grad students fairly. Yes, you did this by saying a word. That doesn't excuse you. Goon w/ CP brother: did you trust your brother when he said he'd never harm a child? If not, well, try talking to a lawyer. Remember your attorney/client privilege -- just talking to a lawyer can't come back to bite you. If the lawyer recommends against taking any action yourself, try making an anonymous tip maybe. All else fails, you might have to outsource this one to your sister-in-law -- give HER an anonymous tip. If that makes her suspicious enough of your brother to keep him from being alone around the kid, that might be enough. If it ends their marriage, well, your brother IS a pedophile, so I'm not gonna cry any tears for him 
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Aug 16, 2016 21:10
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never accept a bribe because it puts all the power back into the hands of the person who hosed up hth
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Aug 16, 2016 21:20
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RE: Cheating softball goon. Need a picture ASAP.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:25
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Murphy Brownback posted:I'd kill for even a chance at tenure somewhere, I don't know how you could be that careless. Even if you're in the backwaterest part of the south I'd imagine dropping a hard N verbally is at least partially frowned upon by some people, I don't care how hung over you are, you should know that. He's right though.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:26
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Business Gorillas posted:never accept a bribe because it puts all the power back into the hands of the person who hosed up hth add extensions to your house and say it was paying for that and then report him. the perfect crime
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Aug 16, 2016 21:26
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"Treat white students fairly" is not the same sentiment as, "ugh, more dark students"
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Aug 16, 2016 21:27
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They'd be idiots NOT to fire you, because putting someone they know for a fact to be racist in charge of managing minority grad students is not only morally wrong but a legal liability for them
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Aug 16, 2016 21:30
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*comes into work a hungover mess* *calls his students niggers* "why am i gonna get fired??" 
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Aug 16, 2016 21:29
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sounds like the perfect crime
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Aug 16, 2016 21:30
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Zzulu posted:*comes into work a hungover mess* "The real victim here is me, the professor who just wanted to voice his very real and valid concerns that our grad students aren't white enough  "
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Aug 16, 2016 21:32
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Jastiger posted:He's right though. Except he's not. Maybe there is a point to be made about ESL students not being great right away at writing papers, but intelligence isn't racial - some of the most prominent historically people in my field are/were minorities and much smarter than I'll ever be.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:32
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Stuff like thisquote:I do anything I can to avoid working with/supervising these students quote:My work stands for itself
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Aug 16, 2016 21:33
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i like nice words
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Folks I said something really racist but it's those stupid learned liberals with their heads up their rear end as always God what a bunch of stupid pansies 
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Aug 16, 2016 21:34
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Murphy Brownback posted:Except he's not. Maybe there is a point to be made about ESL students not being great right away at writing papers, but intelligence isn't racial - some of the most prominent historically people in my field are/were minorities and much smarter than I'll ever be. chinese foreign students are regularly terrible at everything because they just cheated on everything required to study abroad
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Aug 16, 2016 21:34
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Jastiger posted:He's right though. He's actually not. quote:Demographics are tricky. In the United States today, there are A LOT of older White people. Simultaneously, though, there are also A LOT of younger People of Color. Thus, while the percentage of the American public that are White hovers around 70%, the percentage of traditionally college-aged folks is much lower: 59.7%. The critics are right, though, that 62.3% of those enrolled in degree-conferring institutions are White.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:35
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not only that you picked the one race I almost never see in science and engineering lots of chinese, lots of indians, but tbh I almost never see black students in stem, or a lot of grad programs at all really y'all done hosed yourself but it's a good thing none of this is true
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Aug 16, 2016 21:37
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Ok you guys are right I'll get right on calling my chinese colleagues some slurs and cease working with them.
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Aug 16, 2016 21:36
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since when did kramer become a professor lol
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Aug 16, 2016 21:37
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Murphy Brownback posted:Ok you guys are right I'll get right on calling my chinese colleagues some slurs and cease working with them. let us know how you get on
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Aug 16, 2016 21:40
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No my lad, theyre just the ones getting all the handouts, why, my youngest dumbest son took a small loan of ten million dollars and now he's a senator! Patronage makes one great, and this piddling nannystate is just a way of taking my godgiven right of patronage away from me in part by taxing the proceeds of MY VERY OWN PROPERTY to patronize the mud people and give them something amounting to full citizenship instead of merely latin rights I say well no more, I shall hide it all through licensing schemes and spend my considerable domestic fortune to muddy the waters and pay corrupt officials in every state and party if I have to! I'll slash, defund, and offshore myself into the stars and rain hell from orbit! I WILL NOT BE DIVORCED FROM MY AUCTORITAS! DO YOU HEAR ME? I SWEAR TO THE HEAVENS I WILL BRING THE MOON CRASHING INTO THE EARTH TO KEEP WHATS MINE
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Aug 16, 2016 21:41
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why are the words that will actually get you probated in this forum uncensored but the horrific phrase h.t.h. isn't
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Aug 16, 2016 21:42
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haha gently caress that one got away from me a little
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Aug 16, 2016 21:42
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Jesus i was kidding but nice info:D
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Aug 16, 2016 21:56
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Childfree sad goon, I understand how you're feeling and I think you're right on the money about the childfree community. I was actually going to send in a confession about this but gently caress it, nobody knows my username. I found out I was infertile when I was 13, which was obviously pretty heavy poo poo for a tween-aged girl to deal with but it did give me a lot of time to come to terms with my situation. Or so I thought. Now I'm 30 and my younger sister and sister-in-law both recently announced they're expecting. It hit me a lot harder than I expected it to. It's not even so much envy over the actual baby. Seeing our parents fawning over my sister, their genuine excitement about grandbabies, well... I guess it's selfish but I realized I'll never have that. That... closeness. Kids are what bring a family together, and as much as I honestly dislike spending time with my parents nowadays, I have to admit that I'm jealous that I won't ever have that bond with them that my sister will. My life is really good, honestly; my husband and I live in a huge city and have tons of friends and disposable income. We both work from home so we have tons of free time to travel and do basically whatever we want. My 20's were a nightmare defined by poverty and mental illness, and I've climbed out of that hole and built a life for myself that is better than I ever thought possible. But now, watching the joy in my mom and sister's eyes as they discussed baby names, I realized that maybe this is just the life that I convinced myself I wanted. 
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Aug 16, 2016 22:00
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Goon with Pedobro: Turn him in. If he says it was blackmail just tell them it was BS - that he was helping you out financially because he's family. If never gave you more than $14,000 in a single year it's a non-taxable gift. You just tell the authorities that he's trying to get revenge for turning him in. Who are they going to believe? If he were to say that he's been making payments to you for a long time to cover up his pedophilia years he's just going to make his case worse by admitting to being a Pedo for years. The only downside here for you is your brother will never talk to you again (unless maybe he gets help and realizes you were right) and will never give you any more money. But choosing money over saving children from exploitation makes you almost as culpable. Do the right thing. Hell, even if you get in trouble for accepting money it's still the right loving thing.
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Aug 16, 2016 22:06
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I realize this is probably super-cold comfort, but keep in mind adoption is always an option. You seem to want to have a child more than you want to give birth, or that's what it sounded like from that one post, anyway, so just keep that option in your thoughts and see how it feels. Don't make any decisions anytime soon, though -- the fact that both your sister and sister-in-law are expecting might possibly have an effect on your judgment.
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Aug 16, 2016 22:06
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anglerfish posted:Childfree sad goon, I understand how you're feeling and I think you're right on the money about the childfree community. I was actually going to send in a confession about this but gently caress it, nobody knows my username. Be the best auntie that there ever was. Kids needs aunts as much as parents.
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Aug 16, 2016 22:07
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loquacius posted:I realize this is probably super-cold comfort, but keep in mind adoption is always an option. You seem to want to have a child more than you want to give birth, or that's what it sounded like from that one post, anyway, so just keep that option in your thoughts and see how it feels. Don't make any decisions anytime soon, though -- the fact that both your sister and sister-in-law are expecting might possibly have an effect on your judgment. This
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Aug 16, 2016 22:13
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Wizzle posted:Goon with Pedobro: I agree with this. If that aint a fake confession you could save that kids life. Doesnt sound like you have anything to lose worth more than that
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Aug 16, 2016 22:23
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loquacius posted:I realize this is probably super-cold comfort, but keep in mind adoption is always an option. You seem to want to have a child more than you want to give birth, or that's what it sounded like from that one post, anyway, so just keep that option in your thoughts and see how it feels. Don't make any decisions anytime soon, though -- the fact that both your sister and sister-in-law are expecting might possibly have an effect on your judgment. Yeah, adoption has been on my mind more and more the older I've gotten. My company supports a major adoption charity, so I wouldn't even have to pay the fees. Plus my body wouldn't get totally wrecked and I'd be able to save a kid from the system. It all sounds really good on paper but there's an irrational part of me that I've shoved deep down over the years that still wishes I could make a baby that is "mine". I know, I know, it's a selfish notion, and honestly the thought of passing on my garbage sadbrains genes would probably prevent me from reproducing if I were able. But the feeling is still there. Plus I know my dad would never treat an adopted kid the same as my sister's biological child. I have a friend who was adopted at birth and his grandparents always favored the "real" grandkids over him, and it really affected him negatively Oh, and yeah I'm definitely aware that these feelings may be an emotional reaction to my sisters. Don't worry, not gonna make any hasty decisions.  Wizzle posted:Be the best auntie that there ever was. Kids needs aunts as much as parents. This is the current plan. Unfortunately though, I live 6 hours away, so visiting all the time isn't really feasible. I don't want to turn into that aunt that you only look forward to seeing because she brings presents twice a year. I guess I could probably make it down there once a month once the kiddo is old enough to start remembering who I am. I don't even really know how to be an aunt. My parents isolated us from our extended families growing up because they had bad relationships with their siblings. I'm only just now starting to get to know my cousins, and I loving hate how my parents radiate disapproval when I talk about how well we get along. Like, just because your generation all hates each other doesn't mean your kids have to follow suit  Sorry, getting off topic. Delving into my crazy family would require a whole new confession post. 
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Aug 16, 2016 22:27
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Wizzle posted:... but I still wonder if my life would be better if we hadn't probably yes. I know a few older couples that actively decided to not have kids and they seem quite content and travel a lot 
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Aug 16, 2016 22:37
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i love people who are anti affirmative action cuz they live under some delusion that we all start on a level playing field.
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Aug 16, 2016 22:40
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All of my adopted relatives deeply regret being adopted, and spend every day wishing their adoptive parents had been fertile instead
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Aug 16, 2016 22:48
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anglerfish posted:
I didn't know how to be a parent but I'm figuring it out as I go. Same for my brother. He doesn't know how to be an uncle but he'll figure it out. There's no right way to do it. Just don't be a lovely person to them or around them and you pretty much can't go wrong.
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Aug 16, 2016 22:52
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