Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
china bot
Sep 7, 2014

you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX
Plaster Town Cop

hooker goon posted:

mentally ill as gently caress

i think THIS is the context everyone was looking for

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


oof when you're getting paid for specific acts and not by the hour that's below backpage tier.

Warm und Fuzzy
Jun 20, 2006

There's not a single poster on this website who wouldn't suck a dick for 20 frozen pizzas.

Please don't kill yourself.

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

china bot posted:

i think THIS is the context everyone was looking for

it still makes no sense unless you're selling sex for absolute gently caress all

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar
I'm pretty sure that confessor is just someone trying to bait people into admitting they've used hookers before by them contradicting "her".

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

Murphy Brownback posted:

I'm pretty sure that confessor is just someone trying to bait people into admitting they've used hookers before by them contradicting "her".

I've used weed before, and I know you can buy pizza instead

Tolkien minority
Feb 14, 2012


how the gently caress u get 100 in pure profit for 15 minutes of dick suckin and struggle to afford 5 dollar pizza. poo poo dont add up

Warm und Fuzzy
Jun 20, 2006

Murphy Brownback posted:

I'm pretty sure that confessor is just someone trying to bait people into admitting they've used hookers before by them contradicting "her".

If you're right, "she'll" have to cast a new line, cause I don't think a blow job is worth 20 Red Barons.

Before anyone asks, I'll preheat the oven for a blow job.

Warm und Fuzzy fucked around with this message at 20:59 on Aug 19, 2016

Chorman Plamp
Nov 23, 2004
I Craft War
Fun Shoe

Profondo Rosso posted:

how the gently caress u get 100 in pure profit for 15 minutes of dick suckin and struggle to afford 5 dollar pizza. poo poo dont add up

She should just take frozen pizzas as payment so she can't blow all her money on drugs and alcohol she would have to barter with frozen pizzas

the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe

Erath posted:

She should just take frozen pizzas as payment so she can't blow all her money on drugs and alcohol she would have to barter with frozen pizzas

At least she'd still be able to get weed.

HerStuddMuffin
Aug 10, 2014

YOSPOS

Erath posted:

She should just take frozen pizzas as payment so she can't blow all her money on drugs and alcohol she would have to barter with frozen pizzas

She said she does weed. Isn't pizza pretty much as good as cash with potheads?

E: ^^^ :argh:

HerStuddMuffin fucked around with this message at 21:18 on Aug 19, 2016

house of the dad
Jul 4, 2005

I'm going to take a wild stab and guess that antagonizing the mentally ill prostitute who is threatening the possibility of killing herself will only shorten the lifespan of this thread. Please seek help or go to the hospital if you're on the verge of attempting suicide.

Chorman Plamp
Nov 23, 2004
I Craft War
Fun Shoe

gigawhite posted:

I'm going to take a wild stab and guess that antagonizing the mentally ill prostitute who is threatening the possibility of killing herself will only shorten the lifespan of this thread. Please seek help or go to the hospital if you're on the verge of attempting suicide.

Anyone remember when something awful was anything but a politically correct dead gay forum

house of the dad
Jul 4, 2005

Erath posted:

Anyone remember when something awful was anything but a politically correct dead gay forum

I find the whole frozen pizza thing amusing but we've already been on thin ice once with this kind of stuff, and I've only been here like 8 months shorter than you so yeah I remember how people bitched back then too that the forums were dead. :downswords:

Stunt_enby
Feb 6, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Erath posted:

Anyone remember when something awful was anything but a politically correct dead gay forum
4chan exists, why dont you post there instead?

Bombadilillo
Feb 28, 2009

The dock really fucks a case or nerfing it.

Goons:

Understand college poors living off top ramen

Don't understand other poors thinking a 10$ meal is a luxury.

Good luck hookergoon, sincerely hope you make it out alive.

FisheyStix
Jul 2, 2008

This avatar was paid for by the Silent Majority.
If hookergoon is real, may they find the stability and good opportunities that will keep them from desperate poverty all the days of their life.

If they are fake, well, they can go gently caress themselves for a pizza.

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Profondo Rosso posted:

how the gently caress u get 100 in pure profit for 15 minutes of dick suckin and struggle to afford 5 dollar pizza. poo poo dont add up

bradzilla posted:

Crack, meth and heroin aren't free.

bald gnome error
Feb 9, 2011
i'm also really enjoying how, in addition to their total disbelief, goons will suspend their disbelief if they get to talk about pizza


read u dumbfuck... it's that weed booze and smokes aren't cheap... man why couldn't we have gotten a cool TCC whore. theres gotta be one of those minimum

TCC whore(s) pls come tell us your stories, whoever u are

Warm und Fuzzy
Jun 20, 2006

bald gnome error posted:

i'm also really enjoying how, in addition to their total disbelief, goons will suspend their disbelief if they get to talk about pizza


I'll white knight a fellow frozen pizza lover.

deep dish peat moss
Jul 27, 2006

There's apparently a goon that can whistleblow some sick corporate contract killings and we're here arguing about whether prostitutes can afford frozen pizza

bald gnome error
Feb 9, 2011

Shakill OReal posted:

There's apparently a goon that can whistleblow some sick corporate contract killings and we're here arguing about whether prostitutes can afford frozen pizza

yeah, bc THAT confession was actually fake af

but if not, OP is probably already dead from being dumb enough to post it, at least based on the way they described this place. rip in pieces, stay safe ex-corporate ghost, etc

fuck the ROW
Aug 29, 2008

by zen death robot

gigawhite posted:

I'm going to take a wild stab and guess that antagonizing the mentally ill prostitute who is threatening the possibility of killing herself will only shorten the lifespan of this thread. Please seek help or go to the hospital if you're on the verge of attempting suicide.

Let's hope for a natural death please

Warm und Fuzzy
Jun 20, 2006

Shakill OReal posted:

There's apparently a goon that can whistleblow some sick corporate contract killings and we're here arguing about whether prostitutes can afford frozen pizza

I'm imagining the two are part of a shared anonymous confessions universe and they meet one day when she shows up to the Digiorno factory tour just as two thugs are tossing him on his rear end for whistle blowing.

brotato
May 14, 2013

Warm und Fuzzy posted:

I'm imagining the two are part of a shared anonymous confessions universe and they meet one day when she shows up to the Digiorno factory tour just as two thugs are tossing him on his rear end for whistle blowing.

Please, if it were real they'd be throwing him into the pepperoni machine.

God Of Paradise
Jan 23, 2012
You know, I'd be less worried about my 16 year old daughter dating a successful 40 year old cartoonist than dating a 16 year old loser.

I mean, Jesus, kid, at least date a motherfucker with abortion money and house to have sex at where your mother and I don't have to hear it. Also, if he treats her poorly, boom, that asshole's gonna catch a statch charge.

Please, John K. Date my daughter... Save her from dating smelly dropouts who wanna-be Soundcloud rappers.
I think it's hilarious how holier than thou and hateful that whorin-rear end ho is.

You are a sex worker, willingly. Why should anyone except the dumbest mark give a poo poo about you on a personal level?

God Of Paradise fucked around with this message at 03:50 on Aug 20, 2016

Shifty gimbal
Dec 28, 2008

Hey you... I got something to tell ya
Biscuit Hider
Prosti-goon probably doesn't expect people to give a poo poo.
There's a bunch of ways that people can get stuck in prostitution. It's probably one of those things where it seems obvious out of context ("you can find alternatives to smoking dicks for money") but when the bills really needs to get paid right away or you get thrown out on the streets tomorrow, you do whatever you have to. If the path of least resistance is that you know a dick that'll totally pay the bills for a good smokin, and life is being too much of a struggle to find the energy to fight for a different path, the best you may do is stock up whatever energy remaining to stay afloat and hope you eventually amass enough in the future to change the situation. Constantly worrying about having a roof over your head takes a lot out of a person.

Yeah there are plenty of people who are poor as gently caress and aren't prostituting themselves but their own paths of least resistance probably didn't bring them to prostitution. If I was in deep money trouble, the last thing I'd do would be to look for dicks to suck for money because I wouldn't even know where to start and I'd probably do a horrible job anyway, not so much because prostitution is frowned upon. Where the gently caress do you even find high-paying johns anyway? Etc. You work with whatever resources you got.

H.H
Oct 24, 2006

August is the Cruelest Month
I'm posting these two confessions out of turn so that we can finish this discussion before anything else is posted and finally move on to other topics:

quote:

This is the Hobbyist once again. I'm curious about that Provider's rates for a BBJCIM, she could probably get more, same with a trip to the islands. Demanding referrals from other providers also really helps screen out the creeps, since you can ensure your clients have been previously vetted. This is how some of the more high end Providers are able to command such prices.

As someone with a very public-facing job, I understand how it gets tiring to put on your 'game face'. I don't assume Providers necessarily love their job, many people do jobs they don't necessarily love. Really there needs to be a lot less taboo surrounding sex work. Shaming Hobbyists basically shames Sex Workers in general, by treating the supply end of the transaction as 'damaged goods'. Without Hobbyists there is no business for providers, and how else is that one anon gonna pay for her frozen pizzas or catch up on the rent?

quote:

I've been thinking about sharing this since before the hobbyist confession.
I just wanted to add my two cents.


I've been going to prostitutes for some time now. I've been to prostitutes all over the world.
I don't call myself a hobbyist, of course. That's just retarded. I've never heard of a hobby where you pay a professional to do all the work for you.
Guess what? If you go into a hobby shop and purchase an entire collection of stamps you're not a stamp collector, you're just really into owning little pieces of paper.


First of all, $100 is on the lower end but it's not THAT cheap. Usually though they charge by the hour and not by service (unless it's for extra services, fetishes basically, which a blowjob certainly isn't), so the prostitute goon's business model is unusual.
Can't tell you what it means in terms of net profit, since I've never been on that side of the transaction. I'm guessing there is a lot of time you aren't paid for (traveling, waiting between calls) and you have to account for slow days. Making a $100 for a half an hour of work does not equal $200/hr * 40 hours a week. This isn't exactly a salaried position.
Then again, I'm not a professional, so take that as you will.


For anyone who's never tried it, I can assure you that a significant percent of people who are reading this confession have used the services of a prostitute at least once.
It's not just lowlifes who can't get laid any other way, either. Even seemingly straight-laced guys in long term relationships can be regular clients.
If you knew who among your real life friends payed for sex it would blow your mind.
The only reason that they don't talk about it is because of the social stigma. It's the same as smoking weed in places where it's illegal: everyone does it but you have to pretend it's less wide-spread that it really is.
A cursory googling will show you that the supply and variety are practically endless and a lot of it is targeted at middle-class clients.


Have you ever wondered why in almost every country that criminalizes the exchange of sex for money the providers rather than the clients are punished? It's because punishing clients will start a massive flow of teachers, doctors, judges and politicians into court and we as a society will have to face some hard truths we'd rather avoid.
Lawmakers are aware of this so they only go after the pimps and prostitutes, and even that is done only as an attempt to prove to the public that something is done about it.


I have thought long and hard about the moral aspect of prostitution. My experiences have led me to a pretty solid conclusion.
In western countries where prostitution is legal the providers are almost universally foreigners. That should tell you everything you need to know about it. This is not just conjecture by the way.
Every time I had some small talk prior to the act (which almost always happens) the topic of where I come from would invariably come up and when I ask the girl the same question in return the answer will always, without an exception, be another country. Usually some non-western country, but not always.


This is probably the point where I'm supposed to say I'm not going to keep doing it but the truth is I just like it too much to stop.
There's nothing like getting your dick sucked by someone who really knows what she's doing before cumming in her mouth. Unfortunately I can't say the same about full service. After enough use the vagina becomes too loose to properly enjoy it.
I will avoid doing it over here, though. Perpetuating prostitution and human trafficking in my own back yard is too much even for me.



In conclusion: I'm not telling you to avoid going to prostitutes. That would be the height of hypocrisy on my part. But don't delude yourself into thinking there are no moral issues involved.
Just because you like eating steaks there's no reason to think the cow enjoys it.

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


vaginas don't get super loose from banging you idiot goon.

Jastiger
Oct 11, 2008

by FactsAreUseless
Knowledge dropped in that last confession.

And neato, yeah they can if its high frequency and high use. Get a brain moran.

a whole buncha crows
May 8, 2003

WHEN WE DON'T KNOW WHO TO HATE, WE HATE OURSELVES.-SA USER NATION (AKA ME!)

Groovelord Neato posted:

vaginas don't get super loose from banging you idiot goon.

maybe not with yours :smuggo:

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches

quote:

For anyone who's never tried it, I can assure you that a significant percent of people who are reading this confession have used the services of a prostitute at least once.

can i get your accurate poll numbers about the folks that just eh decided to tell some rando that they paid for sex?

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
When you think about it we all pay for sex, I mean come on, how much does it cost when you take a girl out for dinner movie and drinks? Also let's take some time to talk about ethics in gaming journalism and how much bacon and siracha are FTW

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬
I'm confused, how many blowjobs do you get for a weed pizza again?

What if they're paying in beej but want change?

Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh

Panfilo posted:

I'm confused, how many blowjobs do you get for a weed pizza again?

What if they're paying in beej but want change?

Give them the whole pizza and you get a slice. Seems to be the simplest way.

Bargearse
Nov 27, 2006

🛑 Don't get your pen🖊️, son, you won't be 👌 needing that 😌. My 🥡 order's 💁 simple😉, a shitload 💩 of dim sims 🌯🀄. And I want a bucket 🪣 of soya sauce☕😋.

Nooner posted:

When you think about it we all pay for sex, I mean come on, how much does it cost when you take a girl out for dinner movie and drinks? Also let's take some time to talk about ethics in gaming journalism and how much bacon and siracha are FTW

Please don't besmirch the good name of sriracha sauce

Stunt_enby
Feb 6, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Panfilo posted:

I'm confused, how many blowjobs do you get for a weed pizza again?

What if they're paying in beej but want change?
you suck their dick right back

CharlestonJew
Jul 7, 2011

Illegal Hen
How much sex could I get if I started working at the frozen pizza factory

Kaiju Cage Match
Nov 5, 2012




CharlestonJew posted:

How much sex could I get if I started working at the frozen pizza factory

Depends on which one you work at.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Barnes And Body Works
Mar 2, 2016

:shroom::shroom::shroom::shroom::shroom::shroom:
:chillout:

CharlestonJew posted:

How much sex could I get if I started working at the frozen pizza factory

a thousand sex

  • Locked thread