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My I just ride for fun, when the weather is good and I can carve half a day out just for myself--which is very rare now--but when I go I like to take spirited rides through what passes for "curvy" roads around north TX, where there's minimal traffic. I've never crashed or been hurt in any way and even my close calls haven't been that scary. Despite all that, she once told me she wishes she'd never told me she was okay with me riding. I don't really know where that came from and while in my head I was like "too late bitch" (yeah okay not really) I responded with the usual reassurances about how careful I always try to be and she dropped the subject. I dunno, though, just seems odd that she'd reverse opinions like that without anything actually happening to trigger it. I don't hear about that happening to other people without a crash being involved. Then again, it hasn't come back up, so maybe it was just a random comment. Maybe riding on the back of a Heritage Softail with me through Maui for a day helped change her mind, though it was probably a mistake for me to tell her it was WAY slower than my bike. 
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Aug 25, 2016 16:05
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Pope Mobile posted:
Yeah, I definitely agree with you there, but the root of the problem is the same. Just be open about all of those things. Communicate with each other as if you really give a few shits about how the things you say impact the other and their feelings about the things that are important to you. Realize that compromise is actually a real thing. My fiancee knew I was into bikes before we were together and didn't try to change it. She appreciates that I'm big into safety and check in with her when I'm riding. She likes that I do some of the longer rides with a responsible riding buddy. She knows I want more bikes indefinitely. On the other side of it, I don't spring bike-related surprises on her. Outside of parts and stuff, I always talk to her about big budget stuff like new bikes or higher-cost pieces of gear, multi-day trips and such. I always make sure at least a majority of my home responsibilities are done and we've spent some quality time together before I'm gone for a day of riding. If there's things that need to be done around the house on Saturday mornings, I just don't ride. The end result is that I don't resent her for keeping me from riding and wrenching and she doesn't resent bikes for being a money pit and monopolizing my time. I've met a handful of older dudes over the years who have at some point given up riding in order to deal with marriage, home stuff, kids, moves, etc. Because they gave it up and sold their bikes, they were able to come back to it later in life without a big disagreement. My father-in-law to be is one of these guys. He took years off bikes so that he could raise his kids, move for jobs, have a farm with his wife, and the other stuff that adds up to being a responsible adult. And yeah, bikes are polarizing. Some partners will never come around to them entirely, but if you handle that disagreement respectfully, you won't have a lovely life with motorcycles as the linchpin. Chris Knight posted:Holy poo poo that ADV thread is gold: It looks like a few guys are trickling in to point out the stupid poo poo a lot of the others are saying. But there are some serious petulant manbabies in there whose wives I wish I could show the thread to. Renaissance Robot posted:Anybody else remember that goon who destroyed his marriage over a soap dispensing shower head? I need this story. Sounds vaguely familiar, but it's also textbook E/N goon. HenryJLittlefinger fucked around with this message at 16:27 on Aug 25, 2016 |
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Aug 25, 2016 16:22
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Kind of the other way around for me. I told my wife I'm getting less interested in putting big miles on the street and more interested in doing trail riding and wilderness dual sporting. "gently caress that, you'll keep your Buell" Alright
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Aug 25, 2016 16:24
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My spousal unit got me into motorcycles, help my whole world is upside down.
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Aug 25, 2016 16:27
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clutchpuck posted:Kind of the other way around for me. I told my wife I'm getting less interested in putting big miles on the street and more interested in doing trail riding and wilderness dual sporting. Z3n posted:My spousal unit got me into motorcycles, help my whole world is upside down. Your wives sound fun.
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Aug 25, 2016 16:28
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The question is whether their names are spelled the same or differently. You never know.
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Aug 25, 2016 16:31
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The gf and eventual fiance likes that I ride responsibly and pushes me to do more track days. She also admits to wanting to take the MSF and get a Grom. We still plan to discuss all major purchases based on a cost threshold.
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Aug 25, 2016 16:51
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Ensuring that there are no loved ones to protest bike purchases is the True Path.
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Aug 25, 2016 20:29
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clutchpuck posted:Kind of the other way around for me. I told my wife I'm getting less interested in putting big miles on the street and more interested in doing trail riding and wilderness dual sporting. Me: I'm really wanting to get back onto a small sportybike, I'd love another VFR400 or something Missus: I miss the ZRX 
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Aug 25, 2016 20:38
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I didn't just drop the whole "hey I'm riding now" in her lap, either; I've been talking about it basically since we met and finally have the ability to go through with it. She started off as a "no, not those bikes, just cruisers," I told her to stuff it, I'm getting the starter bike I want and it would most likely have a bunch of plastic on it. She actually had been seeming like she was coming around to the idea of me getting a bike, even going so far as to half-shop gear with me (I was still trying to get her to buy poo poo with armor in it instead of some $100 "lifestyle" jacket), but apparently starting to purchase little bits and bobs I'd need (earplugs/plugphones, going out and trying on helmets, etc.) "made it real" and she tried pulling the poo poo she tried pulling. Yes, she couched it as "I don't want you riding because it's dangerous," liberally sprinkled with "a lot of my friends died on motorcycles." A lot being two, last year, who weren't wearing any helmets/gear and pegged a stout mailbox (  ) while going plaid on a literbike. So, okay, I can see that when most of the bikes I was looking at were SV650s and Ninjas; they're covered in plastic, so was that literbike, they all must be the same thing because she's mechanically illiterate.Thing is, she's had plenty of time to make that argument and we've discussed all of it, and it seemed like she'd come around to the idea. She apparently instead decided to wait and just bring it all back up when I got ready to get the bike. She and I are going to have a nice little face-to-face talk this weekend (for gently caress's sake we don't even live together) and during this talk she will become okay with me on a bike or I will become single, and that's pretty much how that's going to work now. She might try to say it's for safety, but no honest partner holds a relationship hostage to get what they want. Edit: She's also a poo poo driver and I would never trust her with a motorcycle of her own at this point because she doesn't have the attitude for it, which doesn't help me explain the riding style I was taught very well. Professor Bling fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Aug 25, 2016 |
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Aug 25, 2016 20:40
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and these mother fuckers said mailboxes aren't dangerous
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Aug 25, 2016 20:50
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A guy I work with was talking about getting a bike for years, he'd sold his when he and his wife had their first kid just because he couldn't afford bike + car. Now they're earning a lot more money he wanted to look at getting another bike but thought his wife didn't particularly like him riding, so he was reluctant to bring it up - not because he was worried it would cause a blowup but because he knew if he asked she'd say yes even if she didn't like the idea because she's that nice, but he didn't want to put her in the position of saying yes when she meant no because he's that nice. He eventually delicately broached the subject and she said "Only if I can have one too".Turns out she didn't mind him riding, she just hated being on the back of the bike and had always wanted her own bike but didn't want to say because etc etc etc.  (Well they're looking for matching Harleys but it's still pretty cute)
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Aug 25, 2016 21:00
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Razzled posted:and these mother fuckers said mailboxes aren't dangerous Only if you hit them brake light first.
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Aug 25, 2016 21:00
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My girlfriend calls me "a James May" when I talk about boring bike stuff and is absolutely uninterested when I show her bikes/parts on the computer, but before I bought my bike she said "Just buy it if you want it." and tells me I look handsome when I'm all geared up 
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Aug 25, 2016 21:04
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My wife was initially opposed to me riding. We've both had relatives die in motorcycle crashes (both involving alcohol and terrible decisions). Still, it was a delicate subject. I basically approached it and said 'I want to ride a motorcycle. What needs to happen for you to be comfortable with that?'. It worked. We have some rules (e.g. no drinking and driving, ATGATT, try hard not to ride after dark), and we're both happy with the arrangement. It did help her get on board when I offered to take her out on a dirt bike date, so she could drop a bike and crash it without feeling guilty. Razzled posted:and these mother fuckers said mailboxes aren't dangerous
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Aug 25, 2016 21:09
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Professor Bling posted:I didn't just drop the whole "hey I'm riding now" in her lap, either; I've been talking about it basically since we met and finally have the ability to go through with it. She started off as a "no, not those bikes, just cruisers," I told her to stuff it, I'm getting the starter bike I want and it would most likely have a bunch of plastic on it. She actually had been seeming like she was coming around to the idea of me getting a bike, even going so far as to half-shop gear with me (I was still trying to get her to buy poo poo with armor in it instead of some $100 "lifestyle" jacket), but apparently starting to purchase little bits and bobs I'd need (earplugs/plugphones, going out and trying on helmets, etc.) "made it real" and she tried pulling the poo poo she tried pulling. You're doing it right.
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Aug 25, 2016 21:32
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Rev. Dr. Moses P. Lester posted:Cycle Asylum: Puts women in their place ... as the rider, not the passenger. Right? Am I doing this right?
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Aug 25, 2016 23:23
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My gf is pretty hands off, so I just do whatever I want. Frankly I don't really see the problem with the "it's my money" statement outside of marriage. Most of my discussion was limited to,"Yeah, I am gonna go test ride some bikes, may be buy one."
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Aug 26, 2016 00:51
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Lynza posted:... as the rider, not the passenger. We're running low on "if you can read this, the dick fell off" shirts, but yeah that's pretty much it.
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Aug 26, 2016 01:13
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Cycle Asylum: My gf is pretty hands off
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Aug 26, 2016 02:20
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Fishvilla posted:My wife was initially opposed to me riding. We've both had relatives die in motorcycle crashes (both involving alcohol and terrible decisions). I wonder how many people have had friends or relatives killed or injured in car accidents and yet somehow don't go around preaching about how dangerous cars are.
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Aug 26, 2016 13:53
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Today I saw something magical. I was behind a Forester and he was loving booking it. Normally when I see a Subaru around here I have to pass asap because they always do 10-15 under the posted limit. This guy was going at a good pace and even passed 2 cars on a straight. I wanted to give him a thumbs up but he turned off at the next light . 
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Aug 28, 2016 20:07
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I drive a Legacy, and pass cars on the regular. My wife drives an Outback, and has gotten 2 speeding tickets. Maybe it's just your area. E: Most days I ride a motorcycle, but kids require a car.
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Aug 28, 2016 21:06
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Oh yeah it's definitely the area. I was in CT last weekend and everyone in Subarus there drove normally. It's just around me, I thought for a while the Subaru speedometers read high or something. It was like without fail always a Subaru jamming everyone up.
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Aug 28, 2016 21:10
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Certain years of the Forester XT run high 13s
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Aug 28, 2016 22:11
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Hobolicious posted:I drive a Legacy, and pass cars on the regular. My wife drives an Outback, and has gotten 2 speeding tickets. Maybe it's just your area. do you think it's that you're more aware of cops or that they don't like outbacks?
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Aug 28, 2016 22:30
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Buhbuhj posted:Oh yeah it's definitely the area. I was in CT last weekend and everyone in Subarus there drove normally. It's just around me, I thought for a while the Subaru speedometers read high or something. It was like without fail always a Subaru jamming everyone up. My wife's 2010 impreza has a speedo that reads about 8km/h optimistic (at 100) and apparently that is pretty standard.
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Aug 29, 2016 00:06
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abigserve posted:My wife's 2010 impreza has a speedo that reads about 8km/h optimistic (at 100) and apparently that is pretty standard. Most speedos are deliberately 10% over.
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Aug 29, 2016 00:16
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goddamnedtwisto posted:Most speedos are deliberately 10% over. God I hate this. I keep up with traffic at least but also don't want to speed. When I'm doing an indicated 80 in a 55 and still being passed I just start cursing. Goddamnit. I've never seen people speed trap the toll lane (which is walled of) I take to commute every day but still goddamnit.
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Aug 29, 2016 00:25
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My wife has an outback 2.5 CVT and it's soooooo dumpy, but it gets like 30mpg despite being a giant heavy bread box, so whatevs
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Aug 29, 2016 01:50
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Space Whale posted:God I hate this. When you get a wr250 like I told you to then you will eventually get a gps and it will tell you your real speed.
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Aug 29, 2016 02:03
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builds character posted:When you get a wr250 like I told you to then you will eventually get a gps and it will tell you your real speed. I can put GPS on a Ninja 300 too.
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Aug 29, 2016 02:29
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I find myself saying, "loving Subaru drivers!" quite a lot here in Oregon. I don't know what possesses them to drive 62 in the left lane, but there they are. making GBS threads it up. Bonus points for "Coexist" variant bumper stickers, the stupid outline of Oregon with the green heart in it, and/or Oregon Ducks.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:08
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I had a civic tailgate my rear end in a walled off toll lane here in Denver this morning. I'm afraid to admit how fast I went.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:11
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Space Whale posted:I had a civic tailgate my rear end in a walled off toll lane here in Denver this morning. Well rest assured, knowing what bike you have, at least 95% of this forum has gone faster.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:23
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Sorry I left off "On an onramp on a Tuesday"
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Aug 29, 2016 18:25
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You are a toxic shithead who starts bullshit and ferments drama for years with people complete with "cm right for ignoring you years ago ignoring again". Why are you making GBS threads this forum up so much? What you just did is worse than useless. Act your drat age.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:35
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Nsap is well known as the worst poster, we've all just accepted it at this point.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:38
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IDK, space whale is giving him a good run for it now.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:41
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Jim Silly-Balls posted:Nsap is well known as the worst poster, we've all just accepted it at this point. This is true but I serve a noble purpose. To weed out and change the Space Whales. You either learn to not be a poo poo or join me.
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Aug 29, 2016 18:45
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