More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

yeah this is definitely the sort of derail we need on a Monday morning

# ? Aug 29, 2016 14:38

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# ? May 31, 2024 11:44

baquerd: Jul 2, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Just kick the poo poo out of their seat and sigh loudly a bunch, that'll help.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 14:53

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

I haven't reclined my seat in probably 10 years. I accept that other people will do it.

EDIT: Always start a derail on Mondays or Fridays

# ? Aug 29, 2016 14:57

Space Kablooey: May 6, 2009

Ynglaur posted:

Pissing me off: people who recline their seats on the plane. This is not loving 2005. There is no loving room.

Okay, fine: it's a 5:40am flight. Maybe he's just tired.

Nope. Assjack turned his light on to read.

The worst people are the assholes who recline the seats, hit your knees, say "I'm sorry", reset the seat, recline the seat again, say "I'm sorry", and repeat until you relent.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:02

Gounads: Mar 13, 2013; Where am I?
How did I get here?

I flew on a family vacation with my three year old. Guy in front of me reclined. I switched seats with my 3 year old who proceeded to kick the poo poo out of the seat for 3 hours, which is exactly what a 3 year old will do if you don't constantly tell them to stop.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:03

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

The proper choice is to make it a road trip unless you have to cross an ocean. See some scenery, have as much foot room as you want, get a comfy bed in a hotel every night. Aww yeah.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:20

Ynglaur: Oct 9, 2013; The Malta Conference, anyone?

Manslaughter posted:

One of the people in that scenario is trying to make the circumstances bearable for everyone, the other is trying to lean back and read in a crowded airplane instead of respecting the personal space of others.

Exactly. I also blame the airlines. But when a group of people are put into a lovely situation, said situation does not excuse being a selfish jackass for one's own mild convenience.

The bootstapseque "buy your own bigger seat you fat goon" response is worthy of this Internet Comedy Forum My 170-lb, 5'7" Cheeto-encrusted mass jiggled with delight at the thought of demanding a raise on such grounds.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:55

Khisanth Magus: Mar 31, 2011; Vae Victus

xzzy posted:

The proper choice is to make it a road trip unless you have to cross an ocean. See some scenery, have as much foot room as you want, get a comfy bed in a hotel every night. Aww yeah.

Back before it was stupidly expensive I used to enjoy flying. Well, the flight in coach from Chicago to Osaka was kind of boring, but at least on the way back I got to fly business class which was a good amount more comfortable(I was standby for the best seat available, sadly the person ahead of me in the same situation got the open first class seat. Probably the only chance I would have in my life to fly first class).

# ? Aug 29, 2016 15:56

bitterandtwisted: Sep 4, 2006

Another day chasing users over Lync for the mail migration.

Hi, have you received any emails asking for your credentials for the mail migration
:geno:

That's odd, it hasn't gone in your junk mail by any chance?
:geno:

my email hasn't worked since the 12th of August.
:raise:

Would you like me to look at that?
:geno:

that would be great.

OK, please click this support link [link]
:geno:

status: offline

bitterandtwisted fucked around with this message at 16:19 on Aug 29, 2016

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:12

Gounads: Mar 13, 2013; Where am I?
How did I get here?

How does someone work without email for 2 weeks?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:15

Polio Vax Scene: Apr 5, 2009

Some people are really good at pretending.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:18

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

Daylen Drazzi posted:

I was relaxing enjoying my last few minutes of the work week at my new job when I got an IM request from one of my former co-workers, a young Messaging tech who had been a Server tech for a couple months before. He apologizes for bugging me, but no one seems to know the answer about email database retention, and it doesn't look like the new assistant team lead has gotten authorization to work with the backup software and do restores. It's Friday, and anyone who might know at my old location has fled for the weekend.

I'm not working on anything, so I go through all the stuff I can recall off the top of my head, give him some contact names of people who are located at other bases who also did Storage & Virtualization and had the same access as me, and then shoot the poo poo with the kid for a few more minutes.

Then another IM request pops up from another co-worker on the Messaging team, and she wants to know some answers to questions about email retention.

I don't blame them for reaching out, and I'm always happy to help when I can, but I started thinking that maybe I should have created some sort of FAQ regarding retention policies. Of course, I never thought that if/when I left they wouldn't give someone else the responsibilities I had. At the same time, I was in a very unique position in that I'd started as a server tech for a year and a half, became a Messaging tech for a year, then moved back to the server side of things as a Virtualization admin, then picked up the assistant team lead role and re-added backup and restoration duties (I initially had them as a server tech and then carried them over to Messaging). I literally had every administrative permission they had to give, and looking back on it I realize they put a lot of faith and trust in me.

I sort of miss it, but I think I'm in a much better place and I have a feeling this contract is going to be very good for developing my skillset.

When I quit $AWFUL_JOB one of my clients (a major national bank with a niche phone system that I managed), called me to ask for help. They knew I quit, but the guy said "JMJF, can you help us with this problem?" I explained I had quit, and told them how to contact my old company. The guy new I had quit, but said "No, we want you, you have to help us, you can just quit your job and bail on us like this."

(Part of why I quit was they were doing a huge upgrade of this system like jumping five or six major versions, and I had no way to test or validate it would work, and the vendor was like "eh, it'll be fine" but it was their stressful trading desk, and these guys were awful to work for, so I didn't want to spend three weekends in a row dealing with this madness.)

I explained I had moved on, but he wouldn't hear it. He starts screaming, and threatening me, "COME WORK FOR US OR ELSE!" Eventually I just had to hang up on him.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:19

nielsm: Jun 1, 2009

bitterandtwisted posted:

Would you like me to look at that?
that would be great.

You just told the user "I'll fix that for you, your involvement not needed."

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:20

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

Jerk McJerkface posted:

I explained I had moved on, but he wouldn't hear it. He starts screaming, and threatening me, "COME WORK FOR US OR ELSE!" Eventually I just had to hang up on him.

Every time they started yelling at me, I'd just reply with "at will employment, it applies to both parties!"

But hanging up was probably more mature.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:28

bitterandtwisted: Sep 4, 2006

nielsm posted:

You just told the user "I'll fix that for you, your involvement not needed."

Ha, had to double check my wording in the message logs in case it was this, but my exact words were "would you like me to remote on and take a look". Also he disconnected like 10 minutes after I sent the link.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:29

Super-NintendoUser: Jan 16, 2004; COWABUNGERDER COMPADRES; Soiled Meat

xzzy posted:

Every time they started yelling at me, I'd just reply with "at will employment, it applies to both parties!"

But hanging up was probably more mature.

If he had made a genuine appeal to work for them, I'd consider it. It's nice to work for the major national state ran bank of a totalitarian country, since money is pretty much no object to them, but the guy was just a complete jerk.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:40

mewse: May 2, 2006

bitterandtwisted posted:

Another day chasing users over Lync for the mail migration.

Hi, have you received any emails asking for your credentials for the mail migration
no
That's odd, it hasn't gone in your junk mail by any chance?
my email hasn't worked since the 12th of August.
Would you like me to look at that?
that would be great.
OK, please click this support link [link]
status: offline

I don't know why I'm finding this person's situation so hilarious, they're verging on a "what the gently caress is the email" moment

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:41

Bigass Moth: Mar 6, 2004; I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.

he knows...

I'd forward that conversation to their boss. Can't think of many office jobs where not having email for two weeks is ok.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 16:52

Sickening: Jul 16, 2007; Black summer was the best summer.

Ynglaur posted:

Pissing me off: people who recline their seats on the plane. This is not loving 2005. There is no loving room.

Okay, fine: it's a 5:40am flight. Maybe he's just tired.

Nope. Assjack turned his light on to read.

Passive aggressively bang into their seat "accidentally" until the ride for both of you becomes a pain in the rear end.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:37

Collateral Damage: Jun 13, 2009

Here you go. Be ready for fights.
http://www.gadgetduck.com/goods/kneedefender.html

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:45

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

For the love of God and all that is holy why did the CEO email himself the full lyrics for "You're all I need" by Method Man?

I'd ask but I expect he's sworn to never reveal the Wu Tang secret.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:49

22 Eargesplitten: Oct 10, 2010

Jerk McJerkface posted:

If he had made a genuine appeal to work for them, I'd consider it. It's nice to work for the major national state ran bank of a totalitarian country, since money is pretty much no object to them, but the guy was just a complete jerk.

Well, that explains it. He's used to being able to send anyone who disobeys to reeducation.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:50

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

What kind of poo poo airlines are you guys flying where someone reclining their seat affects anything but your in-flight entertainment display?

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:52

Gounads: Mar 13, 2013; Where am I?
How did I get here?

Jeoh posted:

What kind of poo poo airlines are you guys flying where someone reclining their seat affects anything but your in-flight entertainment display?

Any domestic non-business-class seat this century?

Some planes my knees touch before they recline.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:55

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

I've never flown anything but economy, going all the way back to the goddamn 1960s. What are the better seats like now? I've seen youtube videos of absurd passenger pods on Emirates that are so far beyond economy class they're like something out of "Brazil."

EDIT: I've talked to young folks that were aghast when I told them that you used to be able to smoke on airplanes. For those of you that don't remember it was as disgusting as it sounds.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 17:59

Khisanth Magus: Mar 31, 2011; Vae Victus

Dick Trauma posted:

I've never flown anything but economy, going all the way back to the goddamn 1960s. What are the better seats like now? I've seen youtube videos of absurd passenger pods on Emirates that are so far beyond economy class they're like something out of "Brazil."

EDIT: I've talked to young folks that were aghast when I told them that you used to be able to smoke on airplanes. For those of you that don't remember it was as disgusting as it sounds.

It didn't really improve the air quality much when they banned smoking, however. When smoking was allowed they had to constantly circulate air into the cabin and remove the old air. Now they keep this to an absolute minimum, so you are pretty much breathing the same stale air the entire time.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:09

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

Also the snacks could actually be considered snacks and didn't require you to dig your wallet out.

Also, free playing cards.

The condition of the air travel industry is loving atrocious. It's hard to be too mad at them because the situation is forced by pressure to keep ticket prices down, but goddamn if it doesn't make something that used to be an enjoyable treat into nonstop misery.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:11

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

It wasn't just about the air quality though. The whole plane smelled gross, especially when you'd first step on. Each seat had a little ashtray in the armrest and they also smelled terrible. You can still see some of them on older planes, permanently sealed shut. There was so much yellow/brown scuzz on things. Ugh!

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:12

Ynglaur: Oct 9, 2013; The Malta Conference, anyone?

Dick Trauma posted:

There was so much yellow/brown scuzz on things. Ugh!

That's what convinced the airlines to finally support banning smoking. Someone ran the numbers and figured out the average plane was carting around 500-600 lbs. of nicotine residue. The fuel cost savings were significant.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:18

Collateral Damage: Jun 13, 2009

I flew business on a BA A380 from London to Vancouver and it's great. Private space, free drinks from attentive and service minded stewards, good* food. And being able to turn your seat into a decently comfortable bed* and sleep through part of the flight is amazing.

*Within the reasonable constraints of being on an airplane.

The round trip ticket ran me about €2000 which I found pretty reasonable considering that the same flight in economy class was €1100.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:18

Arsten: Feb 18, 2003

Dick Trauma posted:

For the love of God and all that is holy why did the CEO email himself the full lyrics for "You're all I need" by Method Man?

I'd ask but I expect he's sworn to never reveal the Wu Tang secret.

If you saw the email, doesn't that mean you are the CEO? :v:

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:19

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

xzzy posted:

It's hard to be too mad at them because the situation is forced by pressure to keep ticket prices down, but goddamn if it doesn't make something that used to be an enjoyable treat into nonstop misery.

Yet airfare is now as expensive as it was before they deregulated the industry* so I'm gonna go ahead and be mad at them.

_{*Note that deregulating did actually cause a significant drop in prices and they've only just recently caught back up so you can stop typing out your sarcastic comments about the free hand and libertarians.}

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:20

Judge Schnoopy: Nov 2, 2005; dont even TRY it, pal

Arsten posted:

If you saw the email, doesn't that mean you are the CEO?

CEO Tyler Durden

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:21

Arsten: Feb 18, 2003

Judge Schnoopy posted:

CEO Tyler Durden

Well, he does have a lot of unexplained facial trauma in his avatar.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:27

Fil5000: Jun 23, 2003; HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

Judge Schnoopy posted:

CEO Tyler Durden

I'm thinking more the end of Killer7. Dick opens his briefcase and it's full of all of the CEO's tablets and laptops, tons of printed bigoted jokes from Bill's email account, all sorts of relics dating back to Tony as he states in disbelief muttering "No... It wasn't me!"

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:31

Dick Trauma: Nov 30, 2007; God damn it, you've got to be kind.

Arsten posted:

If you saw the email, doesn't that mean you are the CEO?

No, he had me looking at his Outlook because he was convinced he'd lost an email. It was just in his secondary account. I clicked on this email and saw "Never ever give my pussy away And keep it tight, aight" and was wishing I'd never read those words in this particular context. :gonk:

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:31

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

xzzy posted:

Everyone's gonna belch or fart at some point. I know I've ripped a couple in my day and done the "oh gently caress did anyone hear that?" peek over my shoulder. It's gross but life happens.

It's only a problem when some clown is conducting a symphony. Change your diet or go sit on the toilet for a while.

Exactly, excuse yourself or step out of the room at the very least - there's a guy that sits behind me who keeps ripping rear end intentionally and laughing about it, along with his stupid little cube partner. I asked him more than once to go to the loving hallway or bathroom because it was disgusting and he'd do that poo poo while I was trying to work or sometimes when I was eating lunch. It got to the point of me threatening to knock him the gently caress out in front of our boss if he did it again because it was like an every other day occurrence.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:35

Arsten: Feb 18, 2003

Dick Trauma posted:

No, he had me looking at his Outlook because he was convinced he'd lost an email. It was just in his secondary account. I clicked on this email and saw "Never ever give my pussy away And keep it tight, aight" and was wishing I'd never read those words in this particular context.

I reject your reality and substitute Judge Schnoopy's. He's a Judge. He knows these things.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:37

bitterandtwisted: Sep 4, 2006

Dick Trauma posted:

EDIT: I've talked to young folks that were aghast when I told them that you used to be able to smoke on airplanes. For those of you that don't remember it was as disgusting as it sounds.

My favourite little fact about the Hindenburg is that it had a smoking room.

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:45

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# ? May 31, 2024 11:44

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzYLTnI7TUI

# ? Aug 29, 2016 18:52

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > More shit that pisses you off: What does that say about the quality of your emails?

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