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Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
The two leads nail the sibling chemistry. The monster design is cool.

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Vulpes
Nov 13, 2002

Well, shit.
I had the pleasure of watching them for the first time recently. They are both good films, and the monster design is great. There was a third planned but 'for some reason' it didn't quite get made.

Tenzarin
Jul 24, 2007
.
Taco Defender
The third movie would be the length of a robot chicken sketch as the monster awakens, crucified, with homemade ballista aimed at it. The movie would not be very long.

MacheteZombie
Feb 4, 2007

Tenzarin posted:

The third movie would be the length of a robot chicken sketch as the monster awakens, crucified, with homemade ballista aimed at it. The movie would not be very long.

Set in the future, the farmers kid's having forgotten the importance of protecting and murdering a gargoyle. Then you have him become like, a cyborg or something. The climax will be the leading man riding Jeepers through space as Earth's gravity pulls them both in and disintegrates them both.


Jason X

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer

MacheteZombie posted:

Set in the future, the farmers kid's having forgotten the importance of protecting and murdering a gargoyle. Then you have him become like, a cyborg or something. The climax will be the leading man riding Jeepers through space as Earth's gravity pulls them both in and disintegrates them both.


Jason X

The monster eats a computer.

Tenzarin
Jul 24, 2007
.
Taco Defender

MacheteZombie posted:

Set in the future, the farmers kid's having forgotten the importance of protecting and murdering a gargoyle. Then you have him become like, a cyborg or something. The climax will be the leading man riding Jeepers through space as Earth's gravity pulls them both in and disintegrates them both.


Jason X

You know Jason survives the reentry right?

Zogo
Jul 29, 2003

Vulpes posted:

There was a third planned but 'for some reason' it didn't quite get made.

That one has been on hiatus on and off for what feels like six or seven years. Maybe next year.

MacheteZombie
Feb 4, 2007

Tenzarin posted:

You know Jason survives the reentry right?

Of course he does, the movie only shows his mask make it through reentry though.

Looten Plunder
Jul 11, 2006
Grimey Drawer
Speaking of movies that never get made, where the hell is my Shantaram movie? It seemed to have got screwed during the writers strike and has somehow been stuck in movie development hell ever since.

DeimosRising
Oct 17, 2005

¡Hola SEA!


Gorman Thomas posted:

Watching Throne of Blood and Kurzel's Macbeth tonight. Any other Shakespeare double features I should be watching?

Be sure to watch Polanski's Macbeth too. Also try Forbidden Planet + the batshit Julie Taymor version of The Tempest.

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Throw in the Derek Jarman version of the Tempest for a nice triple feature.

DeimosRising
Oct 17, 2005

¡Hola SEA!


FreudianSlippers posted:

Throw in the Derek Jarman version of the Tempest for a nice triple feature.

poo poo I haven't seen that since college. Not Shakespeare but how about Sebastiane + The Passion of the Christ

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Gorman Thomas posted:

Watching Throne of Blood and Kurzel's Macbeth tonight. Any other Shakespeare double features I should be watching?

This followed by this

Serious answer Olivier's then Branagh's Henry the V

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours

Gorman Thomas posted:

Watching Throne of Blood and Kurzel's Macbeth tonight. Any other Shakespeare double features I should be watching?

Titus and Coriolanus.

Magic Hate Ball
May 6, 2007

ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this
Mark Rylance's Twelfth Night and Robert Wilson's Shakespeare Sonnets, to go from one end of the historical accuracy spectrum to the other.

Gobbeldygook
May 13, 2009
Hates Native American people and tries to justify their genocides.

Put this racist on ignore immediately!
How many PG-13 anti-drug movies show drug use beyond marijuana? The only example I've been able to find on Google is the all-but-forgotten 1990 film The White Girl. It's weird that the anti-drug film niche isn't being filled.

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer

Gobbeldygook posted:

How many PG-13 anti-drug movies show drug use beyond marijuana? The only example I've been able to find on Google is the all-but-forgotten 1990 film The White Girl. It's weird that the anti-drug film niche isn't being filled.

I mean, can't they not show harder drug use without getting an R rating?

Gobbeldygook
May 13, 2009
Hates Native American people and tries to justify their genocides.

Put this racist on ignore immediately!

Snak posted:

I mean, can't they not show harder drug use without getting an R rating?
The MPAA does have a policy that hard dug use = automatic R, but it seems there ought to be some leeway if you're making the PG-13 morality play.

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
MPAA is not even close to that smart. Their rules are not based on any kind of logic.

Did you see that thing where people complained about seeing the contour of Olympic athlete's packages through their spandex runing shorts? Those are the kind of people who make MPAA rules.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



‘Wayne’s World 2’: Rated PG-13 for “ribald humor.”

Magic Hate Ball
May 6, 2007

ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this
The MPAA also likes to rate even the faintest whiff of queer sex way, way harder than hetero sex, because the MPAA is made up of (wow!) old white men.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



Magic Hate Ball posted:

The MPAA also likes to rate even the faintest whiff of queer sex way, way harder than hetero sex, because the MPAA is made up of (wow!) old white men.

Also a lot of old white women, if "This Film Is Not Yet Rated" is to be taken as truth (seems likely imo)

The morale is: White people are garbage, especially if they're old. Except my grandma & so on.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvNRTTtdpWw&t=180s

sex is shameful as hell apparently

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
The MPAA's mission is basically to protect "family values". We all know what that means.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



Snak posted:

The MPAA's mission is basically to protect "family values". We all know what that means.

ye white opposite sex missionary under an actual duvet

if anybody goes "wow interesting", that all gets shut down. movie song whatever. shut the gently caress down.

Teriyaki Hairpiece
Dec 29, 2006

I'm nae the voice o' the darkened thistle, but th' darkened thistle cannae bear the sight o' our Bonnie Prince Bernie nae mair.

Gobbeldygook posted:

How many PG-13 anti-drug movies show drug use beyond marijuana? The only example I've been able to find on Google is the all-but-forgotten 1990 film The White Girl. It's weird that the anti-drug film niche isn't being filled.

Man, I could have sworn Around the Fire was PG-13, but apparently not. If you haven't seen it, it's Devon Sawa plumbing the depths of the horrors of being addicted to LSD and following Phish around the country.

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



gently caress, there are way fewer heroin movies than i remembered.

got any sevens
Feb 9, 2013

by Cyrano4747
The scene in Pulp Fiction was enough to scare me off heroin for life.

Lsd owns though

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer

effectual posted:

The scene in Pulp Fiction was enough to scare me off heroin for life.

Lsd owns though

Just don't snort it. What's so hard about that?

Guy Mann
Mar 28, 2016

by Lowtax
It would be really cool if somebody could actually suggest a legitimate alternative to the MPAA instead of just parroting the same handful of arguments and unproven speculation they saw in This Film Is Not Yet Rated over and over, year after year.

Magic Hate Ball
May 6, 2007

ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this
Gather the MPAA in a room and then gun them all down.

Uncle Boogeyman
Jul 22, 2007

here's my legitimate alternative: gently caress 'em.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

Guy Mann posted:

It would be really cool if somebody could actually suggest a legitimate alternative to the MPAA instead of just parroting the same handful of arguments and unproven speculation they saw in This Film Is Not Yet Rated over and over, year after year.

Just think of any other media or country that doesn't use an MPAA-style system.

Otherwise, specifically you could do:

-No rating system
-Content descriptions only
-Rating/descriptions provided by the studio
-Rating/descriptions provided by fan or industry sites

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
The loving TV rating system is way better than the movie rating system.

Firstly, don't restrict who can see a movie in the theater. Pay money? get ticket. It's a parent's job to restrict what a child watches, and no one elses. There, now the stake a way lower for films getting certain ratings, and they can serve more as guidelines than rules.

Samuel Clemens
Oct 4, 2013

I think we should call the Avengers.

Lobok posted:

Just think of any other media or country that doesn't use an MPAA-style system.

From my admittedly limited experience, the rating systems of other countries aren't any better than the MPAA.

Edit: Though I'm not sure if it's really that big of an issue. Hollywood still makes a ton of R-rated films, and the PG-13 rating is a lot more lenient now than it was in its inception.

Samuel Clemens fucked around with this message at 23:49 on Sep 24, 2016

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.
One nice thing about the MPAA is that unlike most western countries it doesn't have the force of law behind it. Rating boards in other countries are usually government entities and can force cuts be made from movies or ban films outright. Directors and studios in America always have the option of releasing things Unrated or release what they hoped would be PG-13 as an R if they don't want to make cuts. It does suck that there's usually an economic price to pay for that but there's a difference between "If you release this movie without these cuts it'll have a rating that might cost you money" and "If you release this movie without these cuts you will go to jail."

HUNDU THE BEAST GOD
Sep 14, 2007

everything is yours
Yeah. The MPAA is really stupid but not draconian like the BBFC was.

Slugworth
Feb 18, 2001

If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!

Snak posted:

Just don't snort it. What's so hard about that?
An old friend was addicted to heroin because some musician (I forget who) said you didn't get addicted if you snorted it. Turns out that wasn't true.

Snak
Oct 10, 2005

I myself will carry you to the Gates of Valhalla...
You will ride eternal,
shiny and chrome.
Grimey Drawer
I also didn't mean to imply that it's safe to use heroin if you don't snort it. I just meant that in the movie she's is already hosed up and mistakes it for coke and does a big ole line. At least that's the impression I always got. That she didnt realize it was heroin till she snorted it.

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Gobbeldygook
May 13, 2009
Hates Native American people and tries to justify their genocides.

Put this racist on ignore immediately!

Snak posted:

I also didn't mean to imply that it's safe to use heroin if you don't snort it. I just meant that in the movie she's is already hosed up and mistakes it for coke and does a big ole line. At least that's the impression I always got. That she didnt realize it was heroin till she snorted it.
Yeah, that's the intention. She snorted a mysterious white powder and did not get what she expected. The grand daddy of these mistakes took place in San Francisco in 1972 when

quote:

Following a dinner party, they had "snorted" (inhaled through a straw placed in one nostril) a small amount of cocaine and a quantity of white powder believed to be cocaine. All eight were reported to have snorted at least two "lines" (rows of powder measuring approximately 3 x 4 x 30 mm) of the second substance. Within 5 min they experienced anxiety, restlessness, generalized parasthesias and muscle discomfort, vomiting, and physical collapse.
The second bag was pure LSD crystal with 200mg left after they each did a fat line. A dose of LSD is 100 micrograms, so they accidentally snorted about thousand hits of acid each.

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