Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

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TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

kastein posted:

I had to pillage this festering turd bucket for parts at the junkyard today for an R&D project at work.

In 80 degrees full sun. Fat owner. Smoker. Very hairy dog that shed a lot. I had to open all 4 doors and hope for wind.

Cliff notes: So much anticipation! Thrills! Sudden unexpected clumps of rancid fur! Exotic residues! Unidentifiable deposits! Questionable stains! Unyielding waves of vomit!

just let me die, I have seen too much centsless filth

Absolutely nothing of value was lost however

The drat car is a whopping 9 years old and absolutely trashed inside. People are animals. I've seen squirrel nests that smelled better. You could smell it from 4 feet away from the doors. The only way I stayed sane was by opening all the doors and letting the breeze clear the funk as I worked.

holy poo poo that is vile you poor bastard

# ? Sep 24, 2016 13:05

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# ? May 25, 2024 05:13

kastein: Aug 31, 2011; Moderator at http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/and soon to be mod of AI. MAKE AI GREAT AGAIN. Motronic for VP.

That giant steering wheel gif when put inline just made my phone melt the gently caress down because it isn't a supercomputer. Jayzus. (Here's the youtube version, with better image quality and audio that doesn't murderfuck mobile devices in the ear)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEukgofjVoU

This is what happens when the lines are swapped, yes.

As for the crustpunk pt cruiser, I needed the passenger side occupant classification module and its collection of sensors for an R&D project at work.

# ? Sep 24, 2016 14:36

90s Solo Cup: Feb 22, 2011; To understand the cup
He must become the cup

kastein posted:

I had to pillage this festering turd bucket for parts at the junkyard today for an R&D project at work.

Do you need a ~~hug~~ beer?

I think you need a ~~hug~~ beer. Several ~~hugs~~ beers.

90s Solo Cup fucked around with this message at 20:44 on Sep 24, 2016

# ? Sep 24, 2016 20:42

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

Tubesock Holocaust posted:

Do you need a ~~hug~~ beer?

I think you a ~~hug~~ beer. Several ~~hugs~~ beers.

I think you a beer too.

# ? Sep 24, 2016 20:43

MetaJew: Apr 14, 2006; Gather round, one and all, and thrill to my turgid tales of underwhelming misadventure!

kastein posted:

You could smell it from 4 feet away from the doors. The only way I stayed sane was by opening all the doors and letting the breeze clear the funk as I worked.

I bet a respirator with an activated charcoal filter would've made it smell pretty alright.

# ? Sep 24, 2016 23:59

NoWake: Dec 28, 2008; College Slice

kastein posted:

As for the crustpunk pt cruiser, I needed the passenger side occupant classification module and its collection of sensors for an R&D project at work.

Would be interesting to see how it classified the previous occupant, and if there was enough residual biomass to keep it triggered after they got out.

code:


[ ] MAN
[ ] WOMAN
[ ] CHILD
[X] BEAST

# ? Sep 25, 2016 02:16

kastein: Aug 31, 2011; Moderator at http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/and soon to be mod of AI. MAKE AI GREAT AGAIN. Motronic for VP.

Tubesock Holocaust posted:

Do you need a ~~hug~~ beer?

I think you need a ~~hug~~ beer. Several ~~hugs~~ beers.

I need a loving antibiotic. No joke, I have a bit of a dry cough today and my right arm (the one that got the brunt of contact with the PT Cruiser of Contagion +7) had like a half dozen pimples on it when I woke up this morning. Good christ, I even washed after leaving the junkyard.

# ? Sep 25, 2016 03:00

REDjackeT: Sep 2, 2009

kastein posted:

I need a loving antibiotic. No joke, I have a bit of a dry cough today and my right arm (the one that got the brunt of contact with the PT Cruiser of Contagion +7) had like a half dozen pimples on it when I woke up this morning. Good christ, I even washed after leaving the junkyard.

Next time...

I would not have gone in something like that without a mask and a flamethrower.

# ? Sep 25, 2016 03:40

Finger Prince: Jan 5, 2007

kastein posted:

I need a loving antibiotic. No joke, I have a bit of a dry cough today and my right arm (the one that got the brunt of contact with the PT Cruiser of Contagion +7) had like a half dozen pimples on it when I woke up this morning. Good christ, I even washed after leaving the junkyard.

Not pimples, flea bites

# ? Sep 25, 2016 15:17

Rhyno: Mar 22, 2003; Can't post for 10 years!

Linedance posted:

Not pimples, flea bites

That'd be my guess. You better burn the clothes you wore to the JY.

# ? Sep 25, 2016 15:37

kastein: Aug 31, 2011; Moderator at http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/and soon to be mod of AI. MAKE AI GREAT AGAIN. Motronic for VP.

Linedance posted:

Not pimples, flea bites

Nope, looks very different and already went away.

# ? Sep 25, 2016 16:32

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

The cough is probably the Hantavirus, the rash is just a PT cruiser thing.

# ? Sep 25, 2016 16:47

Blue Footed Booby: Oct 4, 2006; got those happy feet

kastein posted:

Nope, looks very different and already went away.

Just wait until the worms erupt

# ? Sep 25, 2016 19:20

ChickenOfTomorrow: Nov 11, 2012; god damn it, you've got to be kind

kastein posted:

Nope, looks very different and already went away.

did you have skin to skin contact with 14"

# ? Sep 25, 2016 19:32

The Door Frame: Dec 5, 2011; I don't know man everytime I go to the gym here there are like two huge dudes with raging high and tights snorting Nitro-tech off of each other's rock hard abs.

Powershift posted:

The cough is probably the Hantavirus, the rash is just a PT cruiser thing.

Can't be hanta, he lives somewhere with snow. Probably just raccoon roundworms instead, it's fiiiiiiine

# ? Sep 25, 2016 19:40

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

# ? Sep 26, 2016 17:53

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

That's one way to get your partner to sit closer to you. Bench seats would be drier in the rain though.

# ? Sep 26, 2016 18:02

IPCRESS: May 27, 2012

I first parsed the license plate as c1k4 by147.

So will this one be repaired, re-painted and sold on with no notification to the new buyer of what they're actually getting, or is that only done with monocoque Western cars?

# ? Sep 26, 2016 22:08

RandomPauI: Nov 24, 2006; Grimey Drawer

The car with a horrible interior reminds me, I need to figure out how to fix my drivers side seat belt. It stopped latching after I spilled a drink.

# ? Sep 26, 2016 22:17

Faster Blaster: Feb 6, 2010

I don't normally go for the purple-teal chameleon paint, but this sprayjob was really pretty. The failure is in its application.

Also, light blue brake caliper for some reason? Is that a bimmer thing?

# ? Sep 28, 2016 00:27

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

uhm.. not gonna lie. wrong drat thread.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 00:31

spookykid: Apr 28, 2006; I am an awkward fellow
after all

RandomPauI posted:

The car with a horrible interior reminds me, I need to figure out how to fix my drivers side seat belt. It stopped latching after I spilled a drink.

Isopropyl alcohol poured into the slot where the tab goes in, and then exercise the release button like a bajillion times. Hopefully this will clean the sticky residue out of the bit that engages the tab when you press the button. The alcohol then evaporates, leaving you with a working seatbelt latch.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 01:33

Faster Blaster: Feb 6, 2010

Bud K ninja sword posted:

uhm.. not gonna lie. wrong drat thread.

Like I said, that paint was right on, but it's a still Bavarian pig in color-shifting lipstick.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 03:58

davebo: Nov 15, 2006; Parallel lines do meet, but they do it incognito; College Slice

Faster Blaster posted:

Like I said, that paint was right on, but it's a still Bavarian pig in color-shifting lipstick.

You said failure in its application and I started zooming in looking for some defect based on incompetency. I didn't realize the defect was underneath the entire paint job.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 07:55

Olympic Mathlete: Feb 25, 2011

Yeah right paint on the wrong car.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 09:05

Vincent Van Goatse: Nov 8, 2006; Enjoy every sandwich.; Smellrose

Powershift posted:

# ? Sep 28, 2016 11:31

Shrapnig: Jan 21, 2005

Faster Blaster posted:

I don't normally go for the purple-teal chameleon paint, but this sprayjob was really pretty. The failure is in its application.

Also, light blue brake caliper for some reason? Is that a bimmer thing?

New M Sport package cars have bright blue calipers, yes. Not necessarily the actual M cars themselves, but the ones that get the optional M Sport package.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 16:01

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

The main problem I have with a paint like that is if you park next to ugly scenery, your car looks ugly too.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 16:04

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Shrapnig posted:

New M Sport package cars have bright blue calipers, yes. Not necessarily the actual M cars themselves, but the ones that get the optional M Sport package.

So even more of a douchemobile, got it.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 17:26

Mr-Spain: Aug 27, 2003; Bullshit... you can be mine.

iospace posted:

So even more of a douchemobile, got it.

I think they are better brakes than on the base model.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 20:22

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mr-Spain posted:

I think they are better brakes than on the base model.

So that means they can tail gate you even closer!

# ? Sep 28, 2016 23:06

xzzy: Mar 5, 2009

But brakes have nothing to do with tailgating, they just try to mitigate the crunchy finish.

# ? Sep 28, 2016 23:25

Dr.Caligari: May 5, 2005; "Here's a big, beautiful avatar for someone"

An 18 year old clocked at 150mph in ratty Dodge Neon is terrible car stuff.

# ? Sep 29, 2016 20:57

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

Dr.Caligari posted:

An 18 year old clocked at 150mph in ratty Dodge Neon is terrible car stuff.

Well, at least that Neon is going to find a nice home in a crusher somewhere.

# ? Sep 29, 2016 21:07

Geoj: May 28, 2008; BITTER POOR PERSON

Dr.Caligari posted:

An 18 year old clocked at 150mph in ratty Dodge Neon is terrible car stuff.

CBSnews.com posted:

a speeding “blue sports car”

# ? Sep 29, 2016 21:11

InitialDave: Jun 14, 2007; I Want To Believe.

I thought those turbo Neons were considered to be pretty decent?

# ? Sep 29, 2016 21:16

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

InitialDave posted:

I thought those turbo Neons were considered to be pretty decent?

Their not bad cars....

....I'll let Regular Car Reviews explain:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1Zw0eUCl2g

# ? Sep 29, 2016 21:17

Geoj: May 28, 2008; BITTER POOR PERSON

InitialDave posted:

I thought those turbo Neons were considered to be pretty decent?

Yeah but putting some go fast parts on a four door shitbox doesn't make it a sports car.

# ? Sep 29, 2016 21:39

Frozen Pizza Party: Dec 13, 2005

InitialDave posted:

I thought those turbo Neons were considered to be pretty decent?

They can be made stupid straightline go fast with very minimal investment. That's about all they have going for them. They have manual rear windows but power fronts.

# ? Sep 29, 2016 22:13

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# ? May 25, 2024 05:13

InitialDave: Jun 14, 2007; I Want To Believe.

I must admit, I've never understood what they do that a Saab doesn't do better.

# ? Sep 29, 2016 22:36

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Automotive Insanity > Terrible Car Stuff - Im sorry but in this thread we measure cargo capacity in shrimp

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