Taiwan Number 1

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Ceciltron: Jan 11, 2007; Text BEEP to 43527 for the dancing robot!; Pillbug

Imperialist Dog posted:

If you host a goon meet over the border should I bring my bagpipes?

I would love to see the mass confusion playing bagpipes would cause.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 03:48

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# ? May 15, 2024 00:05

Captain Postal: Sep 16, 2007

Ceciltron posted:

I would love to see the mass confusion playing bagpipes would cause.

"Oh, there's a new cat restaurant opening up down the street? We should go take a look at it in the morning. I wish they wouldn't strangle them at 2am though"

# ? Oct 4, 2016 04:02

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

https://twitter.com/JustinVerrier/status/783043454209327104

# ? Oct 4, 2016 04:02

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

Ceciltron posted:

I would love to see the mass confusion playing bagpipes would cause.

The chanter (the part with the holes that you hold with your hand to produce the melody) is basically a suona and the fingering is similar so I could just do something like this instead:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3i5_I_adjqU&t=19s

# ? Oct 4, 2016 05:01

Outrail: Jan 4, 2009; www.sapphicrobotica.com

Imperialist Dog posted:

If you host a goon meet over the border should I bring my bagpipes?

Could that question ever be answered with anything but a resounding yes?

# ? Oct 4, 2016 05:10

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Did China get into vuvuzelas when that was a thing? I wasn't here and Korea only did a little bit.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 05:14

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

# ? Oct 4, 2016 05:57

raton: Jul 28, 2003; by FactsAreUseless

Came across this one again

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pnQ6XbcxWw

# ? Oct 4, 2016 07:17

E_P: Feb 22, 2003

My wife owns a clothing store in Korea and I help out on the weekends. Yesterday a group of 8 older people came in wearing bright neon windbreakers and spent 30 minutes trying stuff on. During this time one of the men who had been loudly yawning walked over to the area behind the register where there are two .7m by .7m square seats. Connected them and then laid down for a nap. I looked at one of the Chinese couples with sort of a "you gonna do something about this guy" style forward shrug where you open your eyes wide and move your head towards them. One of the husbands walked over to his friend, looked at him for 15 seconds then decided he couldn't do anything about it.

He woke up 15 minutes later, walked out and smoked a cig. Then came back in and yelled at his wife to ask for more of a discount on a 89,000 won jacket. After they left my Korean wife said a bunch of racist stuff about Chinese people having no manners.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 07:21

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

E_P posted:

My wife owns a clothing store in Korea and I help out on the weekends. Yesterday a group of 8 older people came in wearing bright neon windbreakers and spent 30 minutes trying stuff on. During this time one of the men who had been loudly yawning walked over to the area behind the register where there are two .7m by .7m square seats. Connected them and then laid down for a nap. I looked at one of the Chinese couples with sort of a "you gonna do something about this guy" style forward shrug where you open your eyes wide and move your head towards them. One of the husbands walked over to his friend, looked at him for 15 seconds then decided he couldn't do anything about it.

He woke up 15 minutes later, walked out and smoked a cig. Then came back in and yelled at his wife to ask for more of a discount on a 89,000 won jacket. After they left my Korean wife said a bunch of racist stuff about Chinese people having no manners.

it's a good thing they were speaking Chinese, otherwise you might have mistaken them for Koreans

# ? Oct 4, 2016 07:26

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

Civilization 6 is coming out soon, and I wonder how hard their built in Civlopedia will suck China's dick this time

# ? Oct 4, 2016 07:38

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Haier posted:

I just really hope she doesn't up in my "LOL crazy person" story pile.

Closure: She was Mongolian and came riding in on her ebike like the hordes of her ancestors did when they rode across the world. It was fine except she thought biting was sexy and she bit my face and my dick. Other than that 10/10, would plunge 100 more times. The fruit box was about 6/10 because it was the end of the day and not as fresh as it could have been. Not her fault. No crazy and nothing weird. She hates Chinese people and wants to get as much money as she can from them and flee back to Mongolia and live the good life. She really wanted to talk about American independence and why, and also WW2 and why the US and UK were friends even though the US fought for independence and hurt the Crown's feelings.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 07:53

Free Market Mambo: Jul 26, 2010; by Lowtax

Haier, you have found The One.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:05

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

An excellent Haier recap.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:20

champagne posting: Apr 5, 2006; YOU ARE A BRAIN
IN A BUNKER

Fojar38 posted:

Civilization 6 is coming out soon, and I wonder how hard their built in Civlopedia will suck China's dick this time

I've never tried opening the civpedia since it kept crashing my system in CIV IV. How bad is the china dicksucking?

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:21

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

Haier posted:

Closure: She was Mongolian and came riding in on her ebike like the hordes of her ancestors did when they rode across the world. It was fine except she thought biting was sexy and she bit my face and my dick. Other than that 10/10, would plunge 100 more times. The fruit box was about 6/10 because it was the end of the day and not as fresh as it could have been. Not her fault. No crazy and nothing weird. She hates Chinese people and wants to get as much money as she can from them and flee back to Mongolia and live the good life. She really wanted to talk about American independence and why, and also WW2 and why the US and UK were friends even though the US fought for independence and hurt the Crown's feelings.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKKbxZvj0lQ

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:24

Fauxtool: Oct 21, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Boiled Water posted:

I've never tried opening the civpedia since it kept crashing my system in CIV IV. How bad is the china dicksucking?

You are the leader of the Chinese, the oldest and the greatest civilization that humanity has ever produced. China's history stretches back into the mists of time, its people achieving many great things long before the other upstart civilizations were even conceived. China's contributions to the arts and sciences are too many and too wondrous to do justice to - the printing press, gunpowder, the works of Confucius - these are but a few of the gifts China has given to an undeserving world!

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:26

Heer98: Apr 10, 2009

IIRC, they were required to write it just like that if they wanted to be able to sell the game in China

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:32

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Yeah, one of the Firaxis people posted about it on Reddit. It wasn't their choice, so Civ 6 will probably be similar.

E: I'm waiting for the Korean butthurt about Korea being reduced from a full civ to a city-state.

Grand Fromage fucked around with this message at 08:39 on Oct 4, 2016

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:37

Third World Reagan: May 19, 2008; Imagine four 'mechs waiting in a queue. Time works the same way.

I say that is fine, do it for every nation.

Alt right civilization 6.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:39

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

Boiled Water posted:

I've never tried opening the civpedia since it kept crashing my system in CIV IV. How bad is the china dicksucking?

http://www.dndjunkie.com/civilopedia/CIVILIZATION_CHINA.aspx

quote:

Throughout much of its history China has remained an insular and isolated civilization, largely ignoring - and ignored by - the rest of the world. This was not difficult, as for many centuries China long held a distinct technological and military edge over any and all external foes. And any threats it could not defeat militarily (such as the Mongols, who conquered China in 1271), it simply absorbed into its own dominant culture.

quote:

Emerging triumphant over the Nationalists shortly after World War II, the Communist government spent the subsequent fifty years consolidating power, modernizing infrastructure, and improving the lives and education of its vast population, a process which included a number of massive missteps, including the idiotic "Cultural Revolution" which did its best to destroy China's intellectuals. In the past 40 years China has emerged as a major world power, an economic behemoth which will soon dwarf all other economies including the once unstoppable United States.

China is not without its difficulties, however. Much of its energy is expended simply supporting its huge and growing population base. Pollution is becoming a major problem as more and more factories are built, and more and more automobiles are clogging the bigger cities. Tibet - which depending upon your point of view is either a captive nation or an integral part of China - remains an open wound and major political distraction for China. None of these are insurmountable, though, and China stands poised to dominate the 21st century.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:49

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

You can tell that whoever was writing the civlopedia was annoyed though

quote:

A creative and innovative people, China has given the world some of the most important inventions in history, including paper, gunpowder, the compass, and movable type. (This section is mandatory whenever Chinese history is discussed, in case you were wondering. It's a law.)

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:51

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

JaucheCharly posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKKbxZvj0lQ

Is there a 10 hour loop of this i can play the next time she comes to bite me?

Edit:

Got one

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57dIRXiRx_s

Edit agian;
SLEEP MUSIC. LMAO

Haier fucked around with this message at 08:57 on Oct 4, 2016

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:55

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

is it bad that this part

quote:

Ice cream was invented in China around 2000 BC: the Chinese packed milk and soft rice together in the snow to make the treat. Marco Polo took the recipes for ice cream and noodles back with him to Europe.

is what annoyed me the most? Pasta goes back to at least the Romans and I'm almost certain ice cream was invented in Persia.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:56

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

The greeks iirc would take snow and sweeten it with honey and then eat it

"sweet cold thing" is a pretty universal thing to eat

# ? Oct 4, 2016 08:57

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Yeah but I'm thinking specifically something we recognize as ice cream, using milk. Milk was never really a thing in China except when they would get conquered by steppe people who drank it. And there's a small non-Han ethnic group in Yunnan that has a historical cheesemaking tradition.

I dunno, I'm not sure about ice cream but I know the noodle thing is 100% bullshit that was invented in the US as a marketing thing to sell pasta back when Italian food was still exotic.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:01

Fojar38: Sep 2, 2011; Sorry I meant to say I hope that the police use maximum force and kill or maim a bunch of innocent people, thus paving a way for a proletarian uprising and socialist utopia

also here's a stupid take
---------------------------->

Also Marco Polo was a really really unreliable author and was frequently full of poo poo

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:08

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

Fojar38 posted:

Also Marco Polo was a really really unreliable author and was frequently full of poo poo

But but.... he makes for good TV!

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:10

champagne posting: Apr 5, 2006; YOU ARE A BRAIN
IN A BUNKER

Cold milk and soft rice sounds more like chilled rice pudding than ice cream.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:11

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

Haier posted:

Is there a 10 hour loop of this i can play the next time she comes to bite me?

Edit:

Got one

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57dIRXiRx_s

Edit agian;
SLEEP MUSIC. LMAO

Yes, you should! Have some ayrak ready, sprinkle it in the 4 directions of heaven and praise Tengri. You should try to impress her with your wrestling and archery skills.

Sleep music, or when you're about to give a "back massage".

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:16

Hedenius: Aug 23, 2007

Haier posted:

I'm the rear end in a top hat on some unknown floor in my building doing screaming KTV on his KTV machine at 04:30 in the loving morning.

God drat it.

I'm puzzled by the concept of a Chinese person owning a KTV machine. Like, isn't KTV simply an excuse to drink and bang hookers?

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:37

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

No it's the most popular recreational activity. It can be for drinking and hookers but it's even more commonly just for the singing. KTV and shopping are basically the only things my girl students do as far as I can tell, for the guys replace shopping with DOTA. Also grindy phone games for both.

For old people in Sichuan the main activities are staring at things and playing majiang or the one card game that exists here for 16 hours straight.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:42

champagne posting: Apr 5, 2006; YOU ARE A BRAIN
IN A BUNKER

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqmbLYWAki4

I have no idea what this is. I felt I needed to share it. It's very dramatic.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 09:46

The Great Autismo!: Mar 3, 2007; by Fluffdaddy

Haier posted:

Closure: She was Mongolian and came riding in on her ebike like the hordes of her ancestors did when they rode across the world. It was fine except she thought biting was sexy and she bit my face and my dick. Other than that 10/10, would plunge 100 more times.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2hzC6vaPYo

# ? Oct 4, 2016 10:08

Haier: Aug 10, 2007; by Lowtax

The Great Autismo! posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2hzC6vaPYo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORz6cOa-Lfs

# ? Oct 4, 2016 10:18

Fauxtool: Oct 21, 2008; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

if you ever want some easy entertainment, comment in a chris brown video how he beat rhianna but its okay because he's so good at dancing. The classiest people jump to his defense.

Is there any chinese celebrity who constantly says/does stupid things but is still beloved by people who only know him from his artistic contribution?

i can only think of jackie chan, but its more like he's a party mouthpiece and not an idiot all on his own.

Fauxtool fucked around with this message at 10:42 on Oct 4, 2016

# ? Oct 4, 2016 10:39

url: Apr 23, 2007; internet gnuru

Sheep-Goats posted:

Taiwan also has some people capable of appreciating art and culture, which is a plus in my book.

And a corresponding (relatively new) twitter feed @culturaltaiwan

https://twitter.com/CulturalTaiwan/status/783238268255023104

url fucked around with this message at 19:23 on Oct 4, 2016

# ? Oct 4, 2016 11:01

Imperialist Dog: Oct 21, 2008; "I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\

Fauxtool posted:

Is there any chinese celebrity who constantly says/does stupid things but is still beloved by people who only know him from his artistic contribution?

i can only think of jackie chan, but its more like he's a party mouthpiece and not an idiot all on his own.

There was the Crazy English guy for a while.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 11:14

fish and chips and dip: Feb 17, 2010

Fauxtool posted:

if you ever want some easy entertainment, comment in a chris brown video how he beat rhianna but its okay because he's so good at dancing. The classiest people jump to his defense.

Is there any chinese celebrity who constantly says/does stupid things but is still beloved by people who only know him from his artistic contribution?

i can only think of jackie chan, but its more like he's a party mouthpiece and not an idiot all on his own.

Just say anything that is even slightly negative about anything vaguely Chinese, and you'll get throngs of those people.

Edit: That dickhead Chinese swimmer fits the bill.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 11:18

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# ? May 15, 2024 00:05

Jimmy Little Balls: Aug 23, 2009

One of the gate guards for my neighbourhood is a bit crazy and over the top friendly, he is also really badly crosseyed. It's pretty busy here so when he sees someone and starts shouting hello and talking at them everyone stops and looks at each other trying to figure out who it is he's talking to, whilst people he has trapped in conversation before start running.

# ? Oct 4, 2016 11:32

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