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Goddammit. I quit drinking and smoking, and still managed to render myself penniless once again by diverting cash into a brand new, non-"disgustingly filthy mattress from 1986" and a new chair (I was running low on chairs again.)  I also paid to have my bike tuned up and the other day I got high and angry, went out and pedaled for 59 kilometers on the fucker, murdering my rear end for days to come. I was smart enough to take a camera with me, and despite the fact that I went out at 5AM while it was still dark, it soon became light enough to take pictures - my camera can't be manually focused and autofocus gets confused in less than ideal conditions. I took pictures of the bunkers and random squalor in the Travno estate in Zagreb, which is something of a massive exercise of 1970s brutalism; the fedora of architectural styles. First of all, I accidentally discovered this picture on the card when I came home and dumped the photos to the PC - for starters, I can't remember committing this kitchen crime, let alone taking a picture of it. The left pot obviously contains burnt pasta, but the grey-brown liquid in the right one remains a mystery. I suspect it's acid slush containing melted limescale and loose enamel (the pot obviously survived whatever the gently caress this was but today feels suspiciously smooth to the touch.) I have no other explanation for this.  Okay, let's start. This picture is one of the first legible ones I took, a few minutes before daybreak, it shows an entrance to the bunker on the kindergarten playground. I could only take this picture when there was nobody around - because when you've got an old weirdo with a neckbeard taking pictures of the kids on the playground and - oh, must I go on?  This store has been closed down and abandoned a long, long time ago. This is where you went if you wanted to buy a marginally compatible Apple II clone, made in Yugoslavia. The eastern block manufactured a horde of mostly incompatible 8-bit breadboxes, all of them overpriced and underpowered, and all of them being horribly late to the market. These things have become quite collectible in the 21st century - you were an idiot back in 1986 if you bought a 6502-based Croatian computer, but in 2016 you'd be even more of an idiot for shelling out a four-figure sum for that same computer just because it's "collectible" now.  This is quite possibly the most autistic building in Zagreb. Looks like it was made in commie Minecraft, in 1974. Commiecraft, whatever. Would you believe it, I caught it in its least depressing state, on a clear, sun-lit morning. The lucky, lucky people who live here have an amazing view of a mothballed army base, a thermoelectric power plant and an exceedingly fragrant landfill.   The back side looks absolutely retarded, the entire rooms are cantilevered like balconies and they hang over a really nasty looking alley!  You can tell that this looked absolutely amazing on drafting paper back in 1973. The reality would be strikingly different - this place looked like a squalid communist dystopia from day one, despite the fact that the apartments here were mega-expensive things that weren't for just about anyone. The cantilevered rooms suck monkey rear end, when you've got a block of concrete sticking out the side of the building like that, you've gotta heat it aggressivelly in the winter or the water is going to start condensing on the walls, and this means that you'll have a nice beard of mold growing around the corners soon, so you'd better turn up the heating to the maximum and literally burn your money away. You're pretty much hosed either way.  Every horizontal surface is caked with pigeon poo poo and, to add an insult to an injury, the building is shaped like a pyramid, which means that whenever somebody throws something out the window, it's going to land somewhere, and this will make someone very, very angry. Every commieblock has its resident shithead who throws trash overboard (in the Roach Tower that would be me  ), but with a building like this you just know people are screaming at each other on a daily basis over some banana peels or an occasional eggshell.AND now, the bunkers, coincidentally, in the same alley, hidden away with a shitload of concrete.  There are multiple entrances to the underground complex, all of them are locked of course. You can't just waltz in with a camera y'know?   Oh man what a nice place to hide from the A-bomb blast! The doors are actually cast out of concrete, but the frame and the hinges are steel. The hill is artificial, there was a lot of soil excavated at the neighboring civilian construction yards, and this soil had to be dumped somewhere. So they fortified the bunkers with this stuff.  Airlocks towering over the alley. And a pretty decent looking 70s tower in the background. (I also spy an unclaimed plastic bottle but that's beyond the point, compare the size of the airlocks to the street light and see how massive this poo poo is! I had to leave the bottle there because I forgot to take a plastic baggy along with me) And finally, my bike. It's at least 20 years old, it's made in Slovenia and it still goes like crazy.   I have more commieblock pictures, but they've been taken elsewhere so I'm gonna save them for some other time.
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Oct 1, 2016 15:49
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GAY 4 ORGANS 
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Jesus that thing is horrendous looking even by commieblock standards.
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Oct 1, 2016 16:39
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Good photos! Your shots of that apartment building and your description are especially vivid.
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Oct 1, 2016 17:15
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:and a new chair (I was running low on chairs again.) lmao
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Oct 1, 2016 17:36
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Great photos and descriptions. Spending all of your money on getting a fresh mattress and fixing a bicycle is an excellent success and I couldn't be less surprised you were running low on chairs considering some of your previous stories. Congrats on beating cancer!
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Oct 3, 2016 03:49
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:I also paid to have my bike tuned up and the other day I got high and angry, went out and pedaled for 59 kilometers on the fucker, murdering my rear end for days to come. I was smart enough to take a camera with me, and despite the fact that I went out at 5AM while it was still dark, it soon became light enough to take pictures - my camera can't be manually focused and autofocus gets confused in less than ideal conditions. That is a fine looking bicycle, and 59km is pretty long for your first ride in a few years! One thing I'd think about would be getting a stronger lock. That chain you have could be defeated in about five seconds with a pair of bolt cutters. The folks at biciklopopravljaona should be able to give you some advice on options, or maybe even find you cheap used lock. Also come and post in the bike commuting thread!
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Oct 3, 2016 03:59
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I'm happy to hear about your cancer-freeness!  Also: Surprising how much your neighborhood looks like Winnipeg! 
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Oct 4, 2016 17:50
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This is a decidedly fruity post. Please bear with me. Here's sort of an update. I'm flipping out on coffee and I'm waiting for daybreak so I can go out cycling to burn off all the excess energy. I must have had five giant cups of turkish coffee, enough to give me a pretty decent heart attack; I'm flipping out but in a pretty good way. But I have good news though! Had beer today with Awesome kid, my former tenant in property A. He told me that he's doing pretty darn fine these days, and if memory serves right, he told me on how he's working in the kitchen of a restaurant at the Dublin airport these days - and he's raking it in. He told me that his English still leaves a lot to be desired - his savings will be promptly reinvested in advanced English classes because he only knows how to speak in present tense; you can't really wait tables if you're limited to engrish y'know? he also bought me a pack of cigs because I was completely broke ...... Also, I realized that I've been trolled. Hard. Didn't want to brag about it before the deed was done, but yes, I successfully kicked SSRI antidepressants two weeks ago. And nothing terrible happened. The goddamn internet had me believing that kicking antidepressants is something unspeakably terrible; truly something to be afraid of because OMG addiction. I never challenged this belief until very recently - I don't doubt that antidepressants helped me to pull through some really hosed up times when my life was in absolute shambles.... uh, okay. I recently thought about life in general, and came to a shocking conclusion that I actually have a pretty darn sweet thing going on - - and that I'm wolfing down antidepressants out of sheer inertia. Is kicking SSRIs such a big deal? FFS dude you kicked a serious opiate addiction that dragged on for three years and, to make the matters particularly hosed for you, you did it in a DIY arrangement concurrently with chemotherapy - how hard can it be to kick maprotiline after all this? Seriously? Armed with this realization, I flushed my pills and decided to brave the storm... which never came. It was a complete non-event, the highlight being "gee I really could have used more than four hours of sleep, but - - oh well." Emotions came back. Positive emotions. As I see it, quite a few people have this weird misconception that antidepressants will somehow make you happy. They won't. They will temporarily 'unplug' your emotions and allow you to sort out your poo poo without stumbling all over your emotions - which, in my case, were completely chaotic and obstructive. I've grown immensely as a person in the past ten years; I find it hard to believe now that I once used to be such a tremendous, prissy manchild - - to the point where even Chris-chan would've facepalmed at my poo poo. Yes, it was that bad. I find it absolutely incredible that I have actual friends now who'll invite me over for beer simply because they want to hang out with me. Holy loving poo poo. Towards that end, a few days ago, Waldo texted me and asked me if I could spare a can of goulash because he was going literally hungry, with nothing to eat at home - - I ended up giving him a large shopping bag full of groceries. Bloody hell, I never imagined that giving something could feel so good. And laughing at something - - not because I was cued by a laughing track, but because I found something to be actually funny. Jesus loving christ. In all, I feel as if I've woken from a thirty-year slumber. I don't want to die. It was actually the antidepressants that gave me that characteristic 'whatever' outlook on life, compounded with impossibly reckless drug usage - - because I literally didn't care to see the dawn of another day. Boy, have the things changed. Waldo is getting paid next week! I also got my new mattress and a chair this Monday, and I've been sleeping like an babby, it's really comfy poo poo. *** I just stomped a cockroach while typing this. Are they pests or... pets? *** Let's change the subject to anime for a bit(sorry ) There's this exceptionally fruity anime for little girls, called Candy Candy, which originally aired from 1976 till 1979 in Japan - - Croatian television got this bright idea to air it over here in 1999. It was this very show that got me seriously hooked on anime and, in a grand scheme of things, completely changed my life. I will openly admit now that this was beyond lame. Hey, I never said I was cool. poo poo. Anyways - - I still have a VHS rip of the last episode which aired in December 1999, in decidedly troubled times. See, our mini-dictator, Franjo Tuđman, died on the day the last episode was slated to be aired, and this naturally sent our government-controlled television into panic mode. The entire program was altered to live news coverages of the late dictator's passing and funeral. Hell, Tuđman wasn't even a cool dictator; he never pulled any plucky Kim Jong-il stuff which made him decidedly lame for posterity. I will remember him as a completely submediocre little dictator who almost deprived the nation out of anime by dying at an awkward time. And that's a mortal sin in my book. I was in panic mode as well, not because I was concerned about the state funeral or the dire state of the nation, but because I feared that the last episode would be dumped into a random time slot, causing me to miss out on the finale. gently caress you Franjo, I want my anime and you're not gonna stop me. My fears turned out to be true - - the anime was dumped into an early morning time slot two days after the funeral - - the TV schedule was in constant flux, basically the editors of various shows were stumbling over each other to express who's more sorry over the guy's passing, making overlong tribute shows over the same old thing - - the schedule was subject to last minute changes; I fortunately caught the schedule on teletext and programmed my VCR to record the anime. In the end, the episode turned out to be a major letdown, but nevermind. However. I ended up recording complete OP/ED sequences, and despite the fact that the show itself was decidedly meh, it was the songs that blew my socks away. In fact, here you go. This is how anime looked in 1976. Head and shoulders over even the best animes of the 21st century. They just don't make 'em like they used to. Opening sequence Ending sequence The songs were performed by an impossibly talented singer called Horie Mitsuko, the Whitney Houston of anime. I was bored one afternoon so I bought me a bottle of vodka (I was 16 at the time ) and decided to watch the recording once again because I had nothing better to do and... holy loving poo poo. The ending sequence features what is probably one of the best drinking songs I've ever heard. I knew the lyrics by heart, so I spent around an hour or two rewatching the drat thing, braying somewhat off-key to the tune while being utterly hammered on vodka. The game was on. The game was so loving on.It was right then and there that I became a weeaboo. The weeaboo thing ultimately lead me towards the abyss, and then, off the deep end again. Sure, I won't argue that all of this was beyond lame, but in the end, anime taught me how to be a relatively decent human being, and it also taught me three new languages - - which, when you think about it, wasn't such a bad deal at all.  Apart from the gay aspect. This show would've reduced Arnie to a blubbering poof. Fire away! fake edit: don't interpret this as a coming-out-of-closet "I'm gay" statement; for it was the anime that was teh gay, not me. There's nothing wrong with being gay, and I sometimes wish I was gay because I have this feeling that gay people generally have tons of fun.
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Oct 8, 2016 04:28
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"a completely submediocre little dictator who almost deprived the nation out of anime by dying at an awkward time." This is the funniest thing I've read all day and a fitting end for a dictator.
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Oct 8, 2016 05:32
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Dude. Does she have a loving pet raccoon? I want a pet raccoon 
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Oct 8, 2016 11:24
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I'm technically Croatian. I have citizenship, passport, whole 9 yards, except for the part where I was brought up in South Africa and immigrated to the US 7 years ago, and now have US citizenship too. When I was 16, my family decided to visit the old country and see the old (literally they were almost dead) relatives. Now I know I grew up in a more affluent area of South Africa, but I thought I'd seen my share of crappy places, but Croatia showed me I was dead wrong. We stayed in the nicest hotel (according to Baba Nela - great aunt) but it literally had no plug for the bath and there was no shower. Moreover, the Soviet era apartments my relatives were forced to live in were completely awful. My gran made Turkish coffee in her bath. I was 16 and didn't know much better but I know that the hospitality was loving fantastic - then again it was mostly relatives - and the pre-Soviet architecture was completely gorgeous. What with the election coming up and me freaking out that a certain immigrant hating nominee might win, I'm trying to figure out an exit strategy. ASF, you have not made a solid case for me going back to Croatia. Except for the healthcare. That sounds awesome! It's been really cool and kind of horrifying to read your posts. Thanks for keeping us informed of your shenanigans, and personally thanks for showing the other side of Croatia that travel catalogues won't tell the normal uninformed person.
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Oct 13, 2016 01:43
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Eric the Half a Bea posted:My gran made Turkish coffee in her bath.  Did she take a hot plate to the bathroom to have a coffee with her bath? Or did she make it with bathwater? Like on a stove, or did she just make 200 liters of coffee after taking a bath? Did she bathe in the coffee?I've lived in Croatia most of my life and never had bath coffe. Maybe I'm missing out.
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Oct 15, 2016 14:49
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Eric the Half a Bea posted:It's been really cool and kind of horrifying to read your posts. Thanks for keeping us informed of your shenanigans, and personally thanks for showing the other side of Croatia that travel catalogues won't tell the normal uninformed person.
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Oct 15, 2016 15:34
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Elukka posted:Legitimately think ASF could write Roach Tower Man's Guide to Croatia. It would be a good book. Vice has local editions, if they have one in Croatia I think ASFs adventures might be a pretty good fit. Weird, catchy and with plenty of substance abuse.
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Oct 15, 2016 22:58
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Eric you know that Croatia is part of the EU right so you can live anywhere in Europe with Croatian citizenship.
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Oct 16, 2016 16:29
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Saros posted:Eric you know that Croatia is part of the EU right so you can live anywhere in Europe with Croatian citizenship. Yes, but it's not part of Schengen meaning I can live anywhere but not work. I was going to move to Germany - have some extended relatives there - earlier this year, but reading up on the restrictions based on my Croatian passport was pretty depressing. Why move somewhere when I can't even work there? I know Germany in particular has different work visas but the job situation in Europe isn't the greatest now what with the Syrian crisis. I have a really good and stable job in the US with free education through the university I work for, but like many others (particularly immigrants) I'm pretty anxious about the upcoming election. Apparently the APA - American Psychiatric Association - has reported more anxiety cases caused by election stress. Things just feel really tense all over. As for my gran and the bathtub... The whole thing was weird. She made Turkish coffee (was more like mud than anything else) in this large weird contraption in the bath. It leaked which was why I think she kept it there. Speaking of Croatia, my family got a notification like over a decade ago from the Croatian consulate that finally the government was returning land/property that the Communist regime had taken. My grandfather used to tell us stories of how he used to live in a nice house (apparently they were wealthy, and my grandfather wasn't one to exaggerate), but in WW2 four other families were put in the house to "share the wealth". So apparently after trying to redistribute the old wealth once lost, I own a tiny part of a forest now. But this all seems so fake. Sort of like Croatia's version of a classic Nigerian scam, except shittier. Instead of "inheriting millions!" I inherit a small part of a forest? There's also mention of a 100 piece dinner service that I'm supposed to go pick up. Joke's on them when I rock up with the consulate letter, demand the dinner service be shipped to the part of the forest I own and then hold medieval feasts and live like Robin Hood.
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Oct 16, 2016 21:56
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All restrictions for Germany were lifted on July 1st this year, so feel free to move there and get a job.
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Oct 16, 2016 22:12
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If you have Croatian citizenship and a Croatian passport, then there are only 5 EU states that require you to have a work permit and those are Austria, Malta, The Netherlands, Slovenia(lol) and The UK. For every other EU country you don't need a work permit anymore, but you might need a passport to enter the country in question.
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Oct 16, 2016 22:24
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I'll be slowly putting this old and tired thread to rest. The good news is that Waldo finally has a steady job which pays regularly; both he and Mario paid their rents for this month and I finally don't have to dumpster dive again just so that I'd have something to eat at home. I used the money to buy me a new hard disk drive and a full year of health insurance - both of which, I think, were prettty sound investments. The bad news is that the brother of my Granny died today, and grandma is devastated. He was 85 years old, the funeral will probably be on Wednesday. Now, I have one weird question for you guys, grandma is 89 years old, and despite the fact that she's spectacularly vital for her old age, she tends to wet herself every now and then. Do you think she'll be cross if I get her some sanitary pads for light urinary incontinence? I mean, peeing yourself at a funeral would've been extremely embarrassing, but I'm not sure Granny would've appreciated the gesture. Help me out here guys!
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Oct 24, 2016 20:18
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:I'll be slowly putting this old and tired thread to rest. YOU CAN'T CUT BACK ON POSTING IN THIS THREAD! YOU WILL REGRET THIS! A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:The good news is that Waldo finally has a steady job which pays regularly; both he and Mario paid their rents for this month and I finally don't have to dumpster dive again just so that I'd have something to eat at home. I used the money to buy me a new hard disk drive and a full year of health insurance - both of which, I think, were prettty sound investments. Um, does she not have this sorted out herself? Like, what does she normally do when she goes out? How do you know she has urinary incontinence? If she's told you, and you're already OK discussing it with her, then maybe ask her?
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Oct 24, 2016 22:02
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Lead out in cuffs posted:YOU CAN'T CUT BACK ON POSTING IN THIS THREAD! YOU WILL REGRET THIS! I still have quite a few funny warehouse stories, I'll be posting them when I get some inspiration to put them down into words, such as a "Gay Love Letter incident", or maybe the dumpster lemonade. Lead out in cuffs posted:Um, does she not have this sorted out herself? Like, what does she normally do when she goes out? How do you know she has urinary incontinence? If she's told you, and you're already OK discussing it with her, then maybe ask her? This is a relatively recent development. Granny said that she's had too much parsley soup and since she's walking very slowly, she simply didn't make it to the loo in time, and this happened no less than three times in the past few days. She told me this over the phone today, so I guess she's okay with sharing this little problem with me - that's why I want to help her out a bit. There are these special sanitary pads for incontinent elderly women; I unfortunately know all about them since I spent a whole decade of my life changing mom's pads and diapers because she had multiple sclerosis and she couldn't hold a spoon straight, let alone change herself.  Granny isn't really my biological grandma. She's my grandpa's second wife; they married in 1949 and lived together until 1993 when grandpa died; it was literally 'till death does us apart.' I disowned my entire biological family because they're illiterate bums and utter shitheads, and yes this does include my mom as well. Granny never had kids of her own, but she considers me as her own grandkid and our relationship is absolutely wonderful. She's both my mom and my granny now - that's why I'll be utterly devastated one day when she dies. I mean, sure she's doing well for being nearly 90, but one slip in the bathtub could badly hurt her at this point - - I try not to think about such things. Oh granny, granny, may you live to be 130, you really deserve it. I must point out that it was Granny who fed me during chemo when I was weak to the point where I couldn't go out to buy a baggy of potatoes. Granny's name is Mary and she it literally a saint.
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Oct 25, 2016 00:50
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She possibly/probably needs them, but I don't think something like that is something you surprise someone with. Just be discrete and call and ask if she already has them or not first. Having someone close to you buy stuff like that for you unprompted can be embarrassing and make them get defensive.
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Oct 25, 2016 09:28
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Take the plunge! Okay! posted:All restrictions for Germany were lifted on July 1st this year, so feel free to move there and get a job. WOOOT! Party town central
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Oct 26, 2016 15:38
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I'll try to be as brief as possible in this post because it's decidedly fruity. It's been one helluva ride ever since I kicked SSRIs. I realized that Mr. Weed cured me from dope cravings with his weed and gave me a reason to kick antidepressants, which was, looking in retrospect, probably the best thing I've done in the past ten years. I won't put too fine a point on this, but jesus gently caress dude, SSRIs are dangerous. I realized I've been doing dope for three reasons, and this didn't occur to me until a few bong sessions ago; 1) SSRIs "unplug" your emotions and dope calms you down; this is a very good thing because your SSRI-medicated brain is driven by logic and logic alone, and it is horribly idle as well. I seriously could have gone postal if it wasn't for the dope, because your SSRI brain turns "why" into "why not." Do you understand how dangerous this is, especially for someone as unbalanced as I was back then? Dope helped my brain to calm the gently caress down and turn me into a meek drooly, to everyone's benefit. 2) Dope also made me feel alive. When you're on SSRIs, you'll eventually realize, especially if you're out of work and bored, that you're simply clocking in and measuring time until you eventually drop dead from whatever cause. How many times did I catch myself waking up at 4PM, only to grab something to eat, then wolfing down obscene amounts of benzos so I'd go back to bed - in order to time travel ahead, a day or two closer to death. Weed made me realize this, and how immensely stupid it was. 3) Dope made me not run to the shitter 12 times a day. This was a serendipitous effect of the drugs, but as it turns out, dope rules out regular employment. Seriously, I've made a few half-assed attempts to land me a job, only to seriously get hired a couple of times before having to give up the whole thing because of chronic bowel issues. I have changed a lot in the past ten years, I cannot stress this enough. Dope helped me to shed my autistic - or "pseudoautistic" shell. I won't open this can of worms right now. It feels strange to say this, but I have become socially adjusted, and I'm even seeking out new friendships and enjoying spending time with the friends I have. This was weed's doing. And yes, I used to be worse than Chris-chan. As strange as that may seem, there's this guy who seriously turned an utter autistic fuckup into a reasonably normal person. I yet have to think of a way to thank him for this (I'm not talking about Mr. Weed, it's some other guy.) All things considered, it took me a decade to become a relatively decent human being, but I'm continuously haunted by my past. I'm always hoping that I'll never bump into someone who used to know the old me, because that person is now dead and buried, and I'd hate having to explain to them what I did in the past decade and how it affected me. I don't mind making a fool of myself, hell, I just have this feeling that they wouldn't believe me and that I'd be wasting my words. Whatever. So I'm at a crossroads now. I'm not hooked on anything right now, but I do have this tremendous pill itch. It's the same thing with former IV junkies who secretly shoot water just to satisfy the needle itch. Benzos are pretty much placebo for me at this point, because my brain in fried to the point where I have to take at least 100 mg of Valium (for example) just to feel anything at all. Since I have a hard time controlling myself around pills, this usually ends with a blackout and time travel. The novelty of this has worn out a lont time ago. On Monday, I'll be seeing my GP and I'll ask her to write me a hospital referral for the butt doctor. This diarrhea issue has been dragging on for a preposterously long time - over 10 years now - and I highly doubt that it's caused by something as pedestrian as IBS. Imodium doesn't really work in my case, and it's just egging me to pop more pills (pills pills pills!) This could be even Crohn's, because I'll be making GBS threads my guts out no matter what I eat. If, for example, I skip eating for a day or two (as it goes with junkie lifestyle), I'll be making GBS threads translucent goo the following day. I know the doctors will shove a camera up my rear end once again, but yeah this has to be taken care of. I really really want to rejoin the workforce, hell, I have the qualifications and experience, and all the doors are widely open for me - yet I'm stuck with these (literally) poo poo issues. I don't mind laughing about that, because that's about the only thing I can do right now. Until Monday, that is. *** By the way, Tuesday is the 'all saints day' and it's a public holiday in Croatia. Many Bibles will be thumped. That's not to say that we're humorless bible freaks, we have our own Halloween with trick or treating and all that stuff, but this happens in February and the festivities usually last a whole week and more. Funny thing is that the corporations are pushing the hell out of "American Halloween" on All saint's day so we'd have two Halloweens and in order to find market for pumpkin, which is hard to move and most stores don't even bother to carry this stuff - and you can never sell enough candy I guess. I remember how much rotten pumpkin we had to throw out, back when I was working in the warehouse, because it just didn't sell. Perhaps they should have sold it in February, I don't know.
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Oct 30, 2016 04:50
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It's good that you're getting a referral to see a GI. I had diarrhea myself for many years and while I knew it wasn't normal, I wasn't really motivated to do anything about it. Only once I started making GBS threads blood 10 times a day did a I seek treatment and I ended up finding out that I had Crohn's. It was a rough ride but I got put on some meds and things are a lot better now.
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Oct 30, 2016 15:48
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It's been over a month since my last post and I'm not sure how many people still care about this thread. I got me some Biperiden the past Wednesday. What the history mandates would be a recipe for a disaster, turned out into a decidedly 'meh' experience. I tweaked for about 30 hours, talked to myself a lot (I swear there was someone sitting right next to me a moment ago!) and then crashed into a three-day slumber. I'd literally wake up every 19 hours to eat a pot of gross fake soup, then retire to bed again. So the whole thing has come down to this. Need I say that I was not impressed? I more than likely won't be doing this again because the whole thing is a huge waste of time and there are better drugs out there. But hold on a moment. My GP recommended me some expensive probiotic pills; my insurance naturally doesn't cover this stuff so I was kinda reluctant to buy them. At $16 for 20 pills, I thought, they'd better work their magic. The capsules smell absolutely rank, like some sort of Basement, but I have to say right here and now that I started making GBS threads every other day and that's, like, a loving miracle. The downside, apart from the cost, is that I'm now breaking absolutely horrendous farts - you don't want to share the elevator with me! I've yet to see if this effect stays permanently. If it sticks till new year, I'll start looking for a job because woo hoo boy I'm back! On the other hand, I now realize that I've developed a list of completely ridiculous phobias of the things that would, as Ulillillia would say, trigger an acidic stink mud reaction. For example, I have a paralyzing phobia of bakeries, because the smell of bread yeast alone would, with an 81% certainity, have me urgently looking for a nearest bush. There's a bakery menacingly imposed between the Roach Tower and the grocery store, and just like Ulillillia has a 'problem' with mirrors, I never go grocery shopping before I've taken my mushy crap for at least 5 times because I just know that the dreaded bakery will cause me to poo poo myself. Again.
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Dec 3, 2016 22:11
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:Also, I realized that I've been trolled. Hard. Didn't want to brag about it before the deed was done, but yes, I successfully kicked SSRI antidepressants two weeks ago. And nothing terrible happened. You know, I've had a similar experience with SSRIs and antidepressants. I've been emotionally frustrated for a very long time now, and I've been considering simply going off them and starting anew. I don't know how to talk to my psychiatrist about this, though, cause I don't have proof that it's what's loving things up for me and they'd strongarm me into taking them anyway. Maybe I'll ask to be moved off of them.
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Dec 3, 2016 22:55
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:It's been over a month since my last post and I'm not sure how many people still care about this thread. We care, and you should never stop posting. A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:My GP recommended me some expensive probiotic pills; my insurance naturally doesn't cover this stuff so I was kinda reluctant to buy them. At $16 for 20 pills, I thought, they'd better work their magic. That's actually pretty awesome if probiotics are working for you! It's even possible that they'll just colonise your gut and you won't need to take the pills. Hopefully everything else is just about them settling in. How are things going without the SSRIs, by the way? Two weeks feels like it would be too soon for them to be fully out of your system, but it's been six weeks now.
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Dec 4, 2016 01:48
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Lead out in cuffs posted:How are things going without the SSRIs, by the way? Two weeks feels like it would be too soon for them to be fully out of your system, but it's been six weeks now. same as always: A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:I got me some Biperiden the past Wednesday. What the history mandates would be a recipe for a disaster, turned out into a decidedly 'meh' experience. I tweaked for about 30 hours, talked to myself a lot (I swear there was someone sitting right next to me a moment ago!) and then crashed into a three-day slumber. I'd literally wake up every 19 hours to eat a pot of gross fake soup, then retire to bed again. So the whole thing has come down to this. Need I say that I was not impressed? I more than likely won't be doing this again because the whole thing is a huge waste of time and there are better drugs out there. also: Pollyanna posted:You know, I've had a similar experience with SSRIs and antidepressants. I've been emotionally frustrated for a very long time now, and I've been considering simply going off them and starting anew. I don't know how to talk to my psychiatrist about this, though, cause I don't have proof that it's what's loving things up for me and they'd strongarm me into taking them anyway. This thread is entertaining, but please don't take medical advice from a croatian druggy. Just talk to your psychiatrist or find a different one. If your worried someone will "strongarm" you into SSRIs try therapy.
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Dec 4, 2016 22:17
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Pollyanna posted:You know, I've had a similar experience with SSRIs and antidepressants. I've been emotionally frustrated for a very long time now, and I've been considering simply going off them and starting anew. I don't know how to talk to my psychiatrist about this, though, cause I don't have proof that it's what's loving things up for me and they'd strongarm me into taking them anyway. Yeah you really shouldn't be taking medical advice from a druggy, but I'll chip in with my five cents anyway by saying that you should have an open and trusting relationship with your doctor, and that if you're uncomfortable discussing the usage of meds with them, that maybe the two of you haven't "clicked together" and that it's time to go shopping for a new doctor. This happens all the time, don't worry about "offending your doc" - I too thought that way for a really long time. In all, I changed four therapists since 2006. The first one was a total loss, the second one was too aggressive, the third one was okay but she went into retirement, and the fourth one is fine and I don't plan on switching again anytime soon. Also remember that with psych meds, especially antidepressants, that there's no guarantee on how the "drug A" will work on you - maybe you'll react better to "drug B" or maybe "drug C." If you want to quit antidepressants, talk to your doctor about it and try to work out the reason why you felt it necessary to start taking them in the first place. It's very easy to pop pills and even easier to write a prescription, but that's a rather clumsy solution, more like sweeping your problems under a rug and hoping that they disappear someday, which is what actually has a realistic chance of happening - but that usually takes a long, long time to happen. A whole decade in my case. Only you can decide when it's time to drop the drugs, and it's your doctor's job to help you on figuring that out. Lead out in cuffs posted:That's actually pretty awesome if probiotics are working for you! It's even possible that they'll just colonise your gut and you won't need to take the pills. Hopefully everything else is just about them settling in. Lead out in cuffs posted:How are things going without the SSRIs, by the way? Two weeks feels like it would be too soon for them to be fully out of your system, but it's been six weeks now. I now feel as if I'm more willing to take good care of myself. Last time I saw my onco, she told me that my liver is shot to pieces and I then had to spill the beans and tell her that I'm a former junkie. This actually embarrassed me, as it should have. Dr Sun Try posted:If your worried someone will "strongarm" you into SSRIs try therapy. Experience tells me that the only doctors who will try to strongarm you into taking antidepressants are the ones who don't have the time for you. Antipsychotics are a whole different thing, there is usually a very good reason why you need to take them - coincidentally, these meds are the only ones the usage of which I have NEVER challenged.
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Dec 5, 2016 20:27
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Forgot one thing, yesterday I went out to find a cigarette and caught a whiff of weed on the bus station. There was a very disheveled looking Albo smoking, he gave me a ciggy and he and I became friends of sorts. He noticed that I look (and smell) like a real-deal skid row bum, so he offered to buy me something to eat which I had to turn down. Sometimes the situation turns out really embarrassing for you. It's not that I was bumming cigarettes, but because I felt like a fake bum - and that there are people in much worse off than I am - willing to help me out, which is something I don't really deserve. A week or so ago, I spoke for a full hour with a guy on the bus station - and I got a lot more than a couple of cigs and empty beer cans. Sure, it was armchair psychiatry, but he did point out that I'm sitting on a lot of money for no reason and that I'm wasting away my life like an utter moron and constantly finding excuses on why I can't do thing X like finding a job and living like a normal loving person. It's not an accident that I bought me those expensive probiotics the following day. $16 would have bought me a lot of beer, but I invested in poop pills instead - and won.
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Dec 5, 2016 20:38
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It is nice to read you making progress of whatever positive kind ASF. I used to struggle with the idea of 'sitting on money for no reason' before something changed in my mind brain and I decided I was 'saving' money for the usual generic responsible adult reasons.
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Dec 5, 2016 20:48
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:There was a very disheveled looking Albo smoking In US-specific terms, that's like walking the streets of Miami at night, meeting a toothless, stoned Haitian who offers to buy you tacos because he feels sorry for you. How can this not embarrass you? Sorry for three posts in a row, I'm high.
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Dec 5, 2016 20:48
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I love this god drat thread and regret that I didn't see it for a few months again. Were you born in Croatia? Every post you write just feels like a goon who happens to be in Croatia and not the other way around. You were definitely born a goon though. Do you have Parkinsons? I'm still not sure if I read the page where you really explain how you got into eating Parkinsons pills and I can't find much information about anyone else who does this.
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Dec 5, 2016 20:57
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extra stout posted:Were you born in Croatia? Eeyop. My biological grandma was Croatian, grandpa was Slovenian, and the folks on my dad's side are Croats from Vojvodina (a region in northern Serbia.) I'm technically what you'd call a Yugoslav. I grew up bilingual in Croatian/Slovenian because I had a very good reception of TV Ljubljana, which at the time had pretty decent children's programming. extra stout posted:Do you have Parkinsons? I'm still not sure if I read the page where you really explain how you got into eating Parkinsons pills and I can't find much information about anyone else who does this. No, but the meds I'm taking, to be more specific, antipsychotics, have a side effect of causing symptoms very similar to Parkinson's disease - called tardive dyskinesia. It gets unpleasant sometimes, but I can manage it just fine. And I'm taking antipsychotics because I seem to have schizophrenia, been hopped up on all sorts of meds since 1988.
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Dec 5, 2016 22:24
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hi ASF, i'm glad you're back and making progress! i'm sorry about the TD; it's a terrible set of side effects. i hope things keep getting better, and i hope the probiotics keep working for you. they did wonders for me and my dumb gut.
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Dec 6, 2016 04:29
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A SWEATY FATBEARD posted:Eeyop. My biological grandma was Croatian, grandpa was Slovenian, and the folks on my dad's side are Croats from Vojvodina (a region in northern Serbia.) I'm technically what you'd call a Yugoslav. I grew up bilingual in Croatian/Slovenian because I had a very good reception of TV Ljubljana, which at the time had pretty decent children's programming. Sorry to hear about the medical issues and the medicine dependency, I didn't mean to not take your life seriously enough but it is hard not to focus on the humor of the thread when there are gems of quotes like "I was running low on chairs again" or also if I press ctrl-F right now, type the word "anime" and then hold down my enter key that is also pretty funny too. Ljubljana is where Slavoj Zizek lives, did you ever see him on the TV? Is Mirco Filipovik like a dear leader to the Croatian people?
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Dec 6, 2016 07:16
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Slavoj Žižek doesn't actually live in Ljubljana, he's too famous for that. ASF, precisely what pills did you get? I know a friend with similar annoying problems nad might tell him to ask the doc about it.
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Dec 6, 2016 14:09
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TitanG posted:Slavoj ŽŽižžek doesn't actually live in Ljubljana, he's too famous for that. Slavoj Žižek has an apartment in Ljubljana and lives there iirc. He goes on tours a lot though.
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Dec 6, 2016 21:26
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Are you kidding me. Didn't saw the ŽŽs in the editor  .
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Dec 6, 2016 21:29
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