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Blood for the Blood God, Skulls for the Skull Breakfast Nook
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Oct 28, 2016 03:36
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If there was any shadow of doubt before, it can now be removed, Xi Jing is the new Mao Zedongquote:China‘s ruling Communist Party declared its General Secretary Xi Jinping the “core” of its leadership on Thursday, elevating his already powerful status. https://www.hongkongfp.com/2016/10/28/china-communist-party-declares-xi-jinping-core-leader/ Welcome glorious Chairman Xi!
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Oct 28, 2016 04:31
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All hail.
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Oct 28, 2016 04:36
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quote:China 'fake sanitary pads' scam sparks health concerns http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-pacific-37788670 Mods please change my name to zhou6665
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Oct 28, 2016 04:38
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so are the sanitary towels unsanitary?
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Oct 28, 2016 04:52
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Maxi(mize profit)pads
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Oct 28, 2016 05:29
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ElGroucho posted:I want to hear more about rad Korean ladies <Assuming that you're talking about my stories about the ladies I worked with in Korea> Edit: holy poo poo, that was a 2,800 word post. I'm just now realizing that I think I really, really miss those ladies. Blistex fucked around with this message at 06:02 on Oct 28, 2016 |
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Oct 28, 2016 05:48
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Blistex posted:<Assuming that you're talking about my stories about the ladies I worked with in Korea> i thought it was a nice post 
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Oct 28, 2016 06:05
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Blistex posted:<Assuming that you're talking about my stories about the ladies I worked with in Korea> That was a really good and heartfelt post, I appreciated it.
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Oct 28, 2016 06:08
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Lemonpieman posted:i thought it was a nice post Brannock posted:That was a really good and heartfelt post, I appreciated it. Maybe a little too personal. My wife came down to see why I wasn't in bed and asked why I looked so sad. I told her that I was just reading some sad news story. I haven't really shared that with anyone I know, and she might feel a little insecure if I told her about how close I was with them, even though it was before I met her. I might repost it tomorrow when my head is a little clearer after a good sleep. Good night goons!
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Oct 28, 2016 06:11
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Ironically, probably my favorite drinking buddy in Thailand is a random Korean guy I met.
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Oct 28, 2016 06:54
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Xi just really really wants to be in charge when the entire system collapses
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Oct 28, 2016 07:24
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I thought they used asbestos to make those pads. I am mildly glad it was something more mundane like made in unsanitary conditions.
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Oct 28, 2016 07:52
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oohhboy posted:I thought they used asbestos to make those pads. I am mildly glad it was something more mundane like made in unsanitary conditions.
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Oct 28, 2016 08:06
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I don't know if ya'll heard yet but the pres of Korea (PGH) has been taking orders from a weird cult leader and skimming a bunch of money towards him. Everyone is pissed. http://www.latimes.com/world/asia/la-fg-korea-president-scandal-snap-story.html
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Oct 28, 2016 08:17
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Blistex posted:<Assuming that you're talking about my stories about the ladies I worked with in Korea>  it was a really nice post. God bless the sisterhood of pepperpeekers
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Oct 28, 2016 08:17
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No fair! I didn't get to read it!
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Oct 28, 2016 08:35
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Haier posted:Perhaps the reason why flybys are directing their anger at this thread. They were poisoned by China without knowing it, while use stoic gents and ladies are well aware of our poisoning. The only thing truly free in China is poison. No even the air is free.
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Oct 28, 2016 09:29
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I read the first part on my laptop during lunch and thought "wow this looks like a good long read it'll be perfect for my commute home". Work ends, turn laptop off, walk to bus stop, pull out phone aaaand ...
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Oct 28, 2016 09:57
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What happened?
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Oct 28, 2016 10:32
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JaucheCharly posted:What happened? Discretion happened.
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Oct 28, 2016 11:14
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Miracle Baby is coming over again tonight. She explained why it was THE WORST SEX OF YOUR LIFE. It was because she has one of those rare clitorises where just looking at it too intensely will cause it pain. It's super sensitive and can never be touched directly or even the area around it. She didn't think this was in any way important to mention last time, nor did she think it was a good idea to stop me from going to town on it and causing her much grief and making her too painful to remain excited. She said she had wanted to be strong for me and not ruin the evening. Like, LMAO, that's not how these things work and the whole thing was totally ruined. That explains the non-reaction during everything else and why she forced me to take a break in the middle. She says that's the only thing I really need to know about that, but I am sure there's probably 50 other things she's not thinking about until it happens. Let's see how coked out and what age she'll be tonight.
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Oct 28, 2016 11:16
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your a terrible person and you are a sex tourist and a racist. That was for you falun bong
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Oct 28, 2016 11:21
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Lil protip. If you are sticking your dick in crazy shell out the 200yuan for a love motel. I know you've never met a nickle you would part with but your gonna end up on the wrong side of a knife or a call to immigration if you keep picking up anything above a 6 on a dating app. There is a reason they can't find a guy normally.
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Oct 28, 2016 11:24
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E_P posted:There is a reason they can't find a guy normally. Yea, but you gotta consider that it might be chinese reasons. Like her being over 26.
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Oct 28, 2016 11:31
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dude, shut up and let him gently caress up hilariously for my entertainment
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Oct 28, 2016 11:47
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Haier, it's a man.
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Oct 28, 2016 12:08
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Glenn Quebec posted:Haier, it's a man. they've already
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Oct 28, 2016 12:18
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Glenn Quebec posted:Haier, it's a man. No word of chocolate and peanuts on the pepper, so no.
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Oct 28, 2016 12:35
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as soon as i saw the description of wide but shallow while having cagey backstory and extreme nervousness i thought "sounds like a post-op transgirl" now im just waiting for the big reveal
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Oct 28, 2016 12:38
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Once Ms CavernVag was asleep, the wily Haier crept out and started rummaging around in her handbag. He knew exactly what he was looking for, and soon found it - her government ID. Haier's main concern was her age; he was no paedo, when all was said and done, and he couldn't abide dishonesty. But when he opened the purse, among the 7-11 receipts and coins, he found something unexpected. The photograph was of a man, well-groomed; a portrait that was clearly taken in a moment of affection. The golden sunlight, stark relief between the sharply-focussed subject and the blurry verdant background, the easy, genuine smile on the man's relaxed face, the casually fashionable attire - it all conspired to frame a picture that was as careful as it was personal. Still, Haier was no rube. This was China - married women, or those with boyfriends - were not unusually found going after foreigners. Remembering what he had come looking for, he quickly checked the date on her ID, before a noise from the bedroom, as his mate stirred in her slumber, pressed him into a hurried, cursory, and for now, fruitless search for illicit powders in the purse. Breakfast was not easy. Haier viewerd his partner with suspicion, and before long, even she had noticed something had changed. "What's wrong?" she queried, with genuine concern. "I know the sex wasn't great, but -" Haier cut her short. He marched over to the sofa, where she had briefly sat (amongst other seats) in the few minutes before they had retired to the bedroom. Her purse was still where she - and he - had left it. Producing the photograph, he confronted her with a cold, hard question. "Who the gently caress is this?" he managed to mumble in mangled Mandarin. Cavernvag sat speechless. "I told you I hated liars. I gave you every chance to be honest with me." She had risen now, and was crossing the well-swept floor towards him. "Honey, I -" Still, he did not let her speak. She would only spin more lies that would be undone as she learned he knew more. "You told me you were 22, 24, 25, 28... but never 26!" He bellowed. "Even after I told you I didn't care, you still couldn't be truthful!" A lull in conversation. Fingers pressed to bridge of nose. Frown. Silence. "I just don't underatand why," he began, but now it was her turn to be assertive. "No why," she said. "You wouldn't understand." "I don't understand you now!" he shot back. "And as for those 'miracle baby' trackmarks on your hands, you don't seriously expect me to believe it's from birth, do you?" She scowled. "Tell me, won't you?!" It was equal parts accusation and inquisition. "What the hell is ut? Heroin? Ketamine? Some other Chinese poo poo I don't know about?" She sat in silence, examining her wiggling toes. Attention returned to the limp photograph in Haier's hand. Each was waiting for the other to move the difficult conversation forwards. Finally, predictably, it was Haier. "So who is this?" He began, calmer. "Is it your husband? Are you married? God, do you even have children you haven't told me about?" "No, it's nothing like that!" the poor girl expostulated. "What, are you going to tell me it's your brother, then?" He snorted. "Your cousin?" If Haier had spent less time snooping on her photographs, and more time on her ID, he would have known what was coming next. Cavernvag was calm, she was quiet, and she was conclusive. "It's not my husband," she stated, "And it's not my brother, boyfriend, or cousin either." By this point, Haier was apoplectic. "Then who the hell is it?" he seethed. She took a deep breath. It was time to come clean. "It's me," she finally admitted. "It's me before the operation." simplefish fucked around with this message at 13:04 on Oct 28, 2016 |
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Oct 28, 2016 12:58
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JaucheCharly posted:No word of chocolate and peanuts on the pepper, so no. ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:they've already She could be post op.
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Oct 28, 2016 13:01
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Sorry about the tease post. Here is the original. So Slumber Party Surgery Conference: So at this point we have been hanging out 2-3 times a week for going on a month and a half and having a great time. I've been learning a lot more about Korean culture and fun things to do in the country than I have from Daves ESL Cafe, various travel guides, or some of the Korean guys I had been hanging out with (but had essentially dumped at this point due to their. . . "Korean Male-ness"). It's spring, and it won't stop raining. We've been cooped up in the school and our apartments for 4 days, and are starting to wonder if we will ever get out again. I have an idea for a "sleep over" style party in my apartment (school apartment on the top floor of the dormitory). At this point in time there are about 15 teachers staying in the apartments. 2 Chinese, 1 Japanese, 1 English, and the rest are Korean teachers who live in Seoul or further away and don't want an hour or more commute every morning and night. At lunch I walk to the dormitory office and grab the master key that is hanging on the wall next to the ~70 year old security guard who is permanently napping in a chair in front of the cctv monitors. I go up to the top floor and take the twin mattresses out of 8 of the empty apartments (fully furnished) and arrange them in a 3x3 square with a hole in the middle in my room. I brave the rain and go to the corner store and load up on tons of snacks, soju, and mix. I load up my PC with a bunch of music, and raid the school's supply closet and AV room for decorations and one of those laser/disco lights and some decent speakers. I buy some cigarettes, a deck of Go-Stop cards (popular Korean card game) and some cheap poker chips at a nearby dollar store. My thinking is, "if we can't go out and have fun, we will do it inside". I circulate the word on MSN messenger (how the foreign teachers and the "cool" korean teachers talked to each other during work) that there was going to be a surprise on the 8th floor after supper. Three of the girls had to go after work due to prior engagements, but the remaining six were up for it. Before dinner I returned three of the mattresses and replaced the key on the wall. After supper (we all ate breakfast, lunch, and supper in the school cafeteria which no lie, was the best-tasting, most diverse menu any school ever had and ever will) the girls showed up at my apartment and when they walked in they all squealed and we had a big group hug. Taeyeon (one of the married ladies) declared that everyone had to return to their rooms and change into their pyjamas to do this party justice. When everyone got back we started to pig out on snacks, work our way through some soju cocktails, and basically talk about our plans for next week, and told funny stories about highschool. They asked me about some of the parties we used to have in Canada, and I talked about how we usually went to someone's house, had drinks, listed to music and socialized like you see in movies. I talked about this one guy who lived 2km down a side road in the bush and how he had a main house, a sauna house with an attached apartment, and how both would have a live band playing and everyone would be drinking, singing, laughing, and hanging out. They all thought that it sounded like some sort of a movie or dream, as they never had those experiences growing up, as most of them spend upwards of 80 hours a week in some manner of classroom from grades K-12. They asked me what kinds of games we would play, and I showed them quarters, an improvised version of beer pong, a TV show based drinking game, etc. They asked me if there were any specific "mixed company" games that one would play when both boys and girls were present. I asked them if any of them had ever played "fire truck" (obviously a joke, not a real game). None of them had, so I endeavoured to teach them. I told them it was a game that boys and girls played to get them excited. Basically, the boy would put his hand on a girl's arm, and then slowly move it up her arm towards her breasts. When she wanted him to stop moving his hand, she would say, "red light". Hee Jin volunteered to go first, and I placed my hand on her wrist and said, "the fire truck is coming". The other girls were looking on with expressions that said, "this is a game? This looks really lame!". I start moving my hand up and pass her elbow, I start to slow down and am approaching her shoulder, I'm thinking, "crap, she's not going to say anything and the joke will be ruined" and just as I am rounding her shoulder she says, "Oh, red light!" and I keep moving my hand and cup her breast. They all look at me really confused, and I say, "fire trucks don't stop for red lights". They all erupt into laughter and one of them has to run to the bathroom because she is going to pee herself. We start setting up the go-stop cards when she comes out of the washroom holding one of those strips of condoms (4 in a row) and loudly asks, "Why did you write my, Min Seo's Taeyeon, and Ji-Yun's names on these?" I look at her in shock, and the other three girls look at me with mouths agape. . . I start to stammer "what are you talking about. . . " when she bursts out laughing and throws them at the group of girls to see that nothing is written on them. The girls start to tease me that I should put on a fashion show and see which colour looks best (the condoms were one of those Durex variety packs in different colours). Yeon Hee (the girl who took a peek at the sauna) said, "I can do the next best thing, and grabbed the marker on the white board hanging in the kitchen and drew her best depiction of my dick. The first question they asked was, "is that life size" and Yeon Hee nodded, then gave me a quick wink (she drew some 9" beast). One of the girls said that we should play strip go-stop and find out if Yeon Hee was telling the truth. Another girl teased her back that she might end up proving to everyone that her boobs were not real which elicited a mock outraged scream and the reply, "they are totally natural". For some reason I asked if anyone had gotten plastic surgery, and half of them nodded. For the next few minutes we all started showing off our scars and upgrades. All of them had gotten eyelid surgery, and two of them had also gotten their noses shaved a little so that they were flat. One of the two that had nose jobs also had her chin shaved a bit, and the strip poker girl said she had a boob job. I asked them why they had gotten eyelid surgery and they openly admitted that it was purely cosmetic, and two of them had even had their parents suggest it before they left high school. Some girls will admit to eyelid surgery and say, "so that I could see better" but they said it was a bullshit reason 99.9999% of the time. The girls who had their noses done said that everyone in their family had really prominent noses, and they only wanted the bridge straightened, and none of the "pixie nose" celebrity stuff. For the next few minutes they fawned and groped my nose and remarked that I had the longest eyelashes and the most perfect eyebrows, and that they were jealous. I got around to asking the girl with the boob job if she got more attention now, but she said that it was still 50% padded bra during the day like most Korean women (remember we're all in PJ's right now), and that she just wanted to not be a 7 year old in her 30's. This prompted all of the other girls to start groping her, and comparing with each other's boobs (something that they said happens non-stop in saunas). Seeing me sitting back wide-eyed, she invited me to test them out, and when I leaned forward to feel, she grabbed my hand and put it under her poo poo and looked at the other girls and said, "the fire truck can take a short cut", which caused the other girls to howl with laughter. We played some cards, talked about how Korea is really, really superficial when it comes to people's looks and their worth, and how they would love to be able to leave the house without makeup. I talked about how makeup was optional for women (Northern Ontario) and that most guys in Canada didn't really care. They talked about how their boyfriends or husbands would at first tell them that they are always beautiful, then hint more and more, and become more obvious that they should always wear make-up, even around the house, or informal outings. The impression that I got from them was that having a boyfriend/husband was a necessary evil, and that most of them were in relationships due to pressure from their parents. They talked about how there were too many rules, and expectations for Korean women, and that it felt like their lives were stuck on a single track. When it was obvious that everyone was partied out, I started to clean up and grabbed a mattress to pile up out of the way and Hee Jin said, "we through we were spending the night!". I apologized and threw some the extra pillows off my bed and off the sofa to them, and started to climb in to bed. Hee Jin then said that there was still room on the floor, and I climbed up on the bed between her and another girl, and we all started to quiet down. About 5 minutes later Yeon Hee reaches over two other girls and gives my groin a few taps and says, "go to sleep pepper". It was pretty much at that moment that I realized that I might never be this close to, or accepted by anyone else for the rest of my life outside of immediate family and my wife. They knew I was a guy, that they were girls, that there would be some sexual tension (which we freely admitted), yet we were all crashing in a pile on my apartment floor. We were from different countries, with drastically different cultures, but they accepted all of that, and even went to the trouble (and possibly annoyance) of speaking almost entirely in English while I was with them, which is not only a chore for them, but a massive sign of respect to me. They admitted that they took me out the first time as a "one time" act of gratitude, but that they actually got to know me, and that they wanted to hang out with me and each other as much as they could, because they knew it was going to be over soon. The next morning we're woken up by my clock radio alarm which is set to go off 30 minuets before I have to be in the office. The girls start panicking because nobody remembered to set their own alarms on their phones, and they don't have enough time to properly prepare for school (shower, makeup, etc.). Worst of all, it's time for the students to go to the cafeteria, and they are all in the courtyard, and someone might look up and see 6 female teachers all leaving my apartment since the front of the dormitory building is covered in huge glass windows. Luckily there was a waist-high wall that runs in front of the doors, so all of the teachers were running bend over to their rooms, and nobody was spotted. Later, when we were all on msn, they were speculating what would have happened should someone have spotted them leaving my room. Fake Edit: My wife just asked me [now last night] what is so sad. I didn't realize that I've been on the verge of tears while I have been typing this out, and that it's been two hours or so. I just started thinking of my last night and day in Korea before leaving for Canada. The girls saw me off Friday night, and we kept things pretty light since I had to catch an early bus to the airport. They said their goodbyes, and I was sort of shocked and let down that they were all really reserved and sort of businesslike, like they were really holding back. I chalked it up to cultural differences, and went to bed. The next morning I opened my apartment door, with my luggage in hand and almost walked into them. All 9 of them were standing outside of my apartment door, on their day off (Saturday), when they should have been at home in Seoul or elsewhere resting and hanging out with their families. I was shocked, and just stood there for a second, and asked them what they were doing, and Hee Jin said, "you didn't think we'd miss one more day to hang out?". At once we all started crying, and hugging and saying "I love you, we will see you again, don't leave us in this prison" (the school). We pretty much bawled our eyes out for 5 minutes, until the cab to take me to the bus stop arrived and started honking the horn. I went back to Korea with my wife, but I never got together with the girls again, since we were newly married and wanted everything to be, "just the two of us". I think it just dawned on me while typing this story novel out , how much I regret that decision, and how much I miss those rad Korean ladies.
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Oct 28, 2016 13:06
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gently caress, I posted my poo poo to fill time on a bus ride. Yours was a much better read. And having lived abroad in "teacher accommodation" you do get ridiculously close like that. Mine wasn't even vaguely Asia-related (as Yurop tends not to be) but drat if I don't identify with the sentiment
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Oct 28, 2016 13:16
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Grand Fromage posted:All hail. 
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Oct 28, 2016 13:48
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Oct 28, 2016 14:23
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thank you for the repost blistex
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Oct 28, 2016 14:35
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Blistex posted:<Assuming that you're talking about my stories about the ladies I worked with in Korea> It was good, and I hope all those ladies are still hanging out like the cool crew they are.
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Oct 28, 2016 14:44
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Glenn Quebec posted:She could be post op. I find her constant lying about her age more troubling than her possible reassignment, what a weird think to keep changing.
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Oct 28, 2016 14:46
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Baronjutter posted:When I was in Malaysia chinese kids would follow me around and say "Hi John!!" and random people would shout "hey john!" or just "John!!" at me. To be fair whenever i see an asian using cutlery i stare at them for half an hour too
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Oct 28, 2016 14:51
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