ElGroucho posted:

I hope the spoiler is: it wasn't her bike

ElGroucho posted:

I'm not sure being a 19 year old trust fund "entrepreneur" is anything to show off

This sounds like stdh/humblebrag

GOTTA STAY FAI posted:

Anyone who self-identifies as an entrepreneur is either into MLM or trying to look important/professional/successful, or both. People without attention-seeking tendencies just say things like "I run a small restaurant" or "I started an investment group" or "I'm a small business owner."

chitoryu12 posted:

Has anyone ever figured out a definite meaning of "entrepreneur" in terms of when people call themselves that? It feels like they're people who just try stupid scams and get-rich-quick schemes, or try to sell some kind of branded muscle cream.

goose willis posted:

GOTTA STAY FAI posted:

It used to mean "enterprising, motivated person taking on the challenge of starting his or her own business," but MLMs and gurus stole it and added "who is better than everyone not starting a business/in my MLM because those losers just don't want it enough to succeed and thus won't ever drive fancy cars or take lavish vacations or be their own bosses, they'll just keep working their 9 to 5 until they die."

Dogfish posted:

That seems 100% plausible to me, based on my experience of six-year-olds.

Jerry Cotton posted:

Actually the exclamation marks and the spelling look pretty legit... but do six-year-olds have such neat hand-writing? I know I didn't but

Jerry Cotton posted:

It may be fake but it's art:

Jerry Cotton posted:

Actually the exclamation marks and the spelling look pretty legit... but do six-year-olds have such neat hand-writing? I know I didn't but

life is killing me posted:

Speaking of which what the poo poo is the owner of a company doing at the front desk and how would you even begin to own a company at 19 unless you were a child prodigy or your daddy gave it to you

Ytlaya posted:

I'm mixed on that stdh; my mom taught first grade for over 40 years and I've seen a LOT of 6-7 year old handwriting, and that is pretty much exactly what it looks like. But stuff like "pooped" being spelled both correctly and incorrectly makes me unsure.

quote:

This troper, as the only female child and the youngest, will NEVER complain to her father about her boyfriend - unless he actually deserves it. This is because my father traveled across the country, in less than 12 hours to go annihilate the unfortunate bastard that put one of his little sisters in the emergency room. His now ex-wife was the victim of a glare so withering she stopped talking to him for three days afterward (she dared to ask why he was taking all of their savings). The idiot in question was beat severely about the head and shoulders with a full, old-fashioned, glass bottle of Coke for the following reasons: Beating up on little sister, making my father travel cross-country to kick his rear end, threatening said little sister's twin within earshot and MAKING HIM WASTE A PERFECTLY GOOD COKE HE JUST PAID FOR. Lesson: Don't hurt a Marine's little sister.

quote:

This troper has given If You Ever Do Anything To Hurt Her speeches to potential dates... for herself. It usually goes along the lines of "If you ever rape me, I'll break into your house while you're sleeping, have you bound and gagged, cut off circulation to all four of your limbs and then have them sawed off. I will then proceed to burn and brand every single crime you have done to me onto every inch of available flesh, and then I will gouge out your eyes and cut off your tongue. I'll flagellate you until your back is covered with accentuatingly lovely pinstripes, and rip out your kidneys. And then I'll castrate you. Understood?" This troper would like to add that she doesn't get many dates.

quote:

This Troper is not very physically imposing. However, he is known for a cool demeanor and a near-sociopathic view of extreme violence (despite his religious background.) He has a stock If You Ever Do Anything To Hurt Her (or him in this case) to his various friends' new girlfriends that goes something like this, "If you even think about cheating on him, your parents will receive an anonymous package containing two of your severed fingers. If you try to hurt anyone I care about, they will never find your body." To this day, This Troper has never needed to carry through, most likely because the recipients of such a phrase know to a certainty that I will carry through with the threats without so much as a hesitation.

quote:

This troper has delivered two such speeches. One made the violence explicit - vowing to garrotte the man in question with his own intestines - and the other did not - merely saying the words "I will drop the hammer on you like the fist of an angry God". The first relationship is still going. The second is not. In other news, the sinner in the second suffered a rather unpleasant and unsightly broken nose just days before he was scheduled to play the lead in Hamlet. How sad.

quote:

This troped delieved it to his twin sister's only boyfriend. She's a total cloud cuckoolander, and I'm known among the school to be extremly protective of her, to the point that I once gave a man taller than myself (I am six feet two inches) two broken ribs for trying to take advantage of her. Her boyfriend was rightly terrified when I cornered him in the locker room holding a cricket bat. Oh how we laugh about that now.

quote:

This Troper's cousin, a Marine officer, once discouraged the worthless ex-boyfriend who'd gotten another cousin addicted to drugs from trying to rekindle his relationship with her by pointing out that 1) the US government had trained him expertly in killing people 2) he was in command of approximately 150 Recon Marines 3) all of whom would be willing to give my cousin an alibi, and some of whom would cheerfully volunteer to do the killing themselves.

quote:

In an attempt to avoid actually giving the speech, this Troper forced his sister into a reluctant state of Nunnery. Partly because nobody else in the family will give the speech and if she brought a boyfriend to a family gathering he'd never, ever want to come within three states of us ever again. For example: A cousin of my father brought her (then new) boyfriend to Thanksgiving, and my drunk uncle went up to him and went "I bet you'd taste good with barbecue sauce." Needless to say my grandmother has threatened us with death if we pick on the poor man again... that is until last Thanksgiving when he didn't even say "hi" to my grandmother. I made the suggestion we get a giant sign that says "We love Al!" In front of the house and my uncle made the official game that we have to reference barbecue sauce as much as possible around him. This Easter's gonna be fun~

quote:

This troper is very, very ready to invoke this trope, but has yet to find the chance to do it when the offending party is alone. A girl (a Vitriolic Best Bud who is slowly losing more and more favour with this troper) is dating a good buddy of hers. Now, said girl is revealing herself to be quite the horny whore, and sadly she's slowly infecting her boyfriend. To top it all off, said girl is egging on another good friend of this troper's (who's becoming a Dogged Nice Guy at the same rate as this troper hating the girl more and more). This troper doesn't like this. So, as soon as she gets the chance, she's going to take the girl aside and threaten to break into her house, bind and gag her, torture her with papercuts in the webs of her hands and lemon juice (or something equally painful), bash her head in with whatever books she can get a hold of, rip up and burn her "designer" apparel and accessories while she's conscious, and then hang her upside down from her ceiling if she emotionally hurts both or either one of them. She may improvise more, and say it like Heath Ledger's rendition of the Joker to instill more fear.

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Burn TV Tropes to the ground.

Khazar-khum posted:

Now, said girl is revealing herself to be quite the horny whore, and sadly she's slowly infecting her boyfriend.

CROWS EVERYWHERE posted:

Burn TV Tropes to the ground.

Khazar-khum posted:

In an attempt to avoid actually giving the speech, this Troper forced his sister into a reluctant state of Nunnery. Partly because nobody else in the family will give the speech and if she brought a boyfriend to a family gathering he'd never, ever want to come within three states of us ever again. For example: A cousin of my father brought her (then new) boyfriend to Thanksgiving, and my drunk uncle went up to him and went "I bet you'd taste good with barbecue sauce." Needless to say my grandmother has threatened us with death if we pick on the poor man again... that is until last Thanksgiving when he didn't even say "hi" to my grandmother. I made the suggestion we get a giant sign that says "We love Al!" In front of the house and my uncle made the official game that we have to reference barbecue sauce as much as possible around him. This Easter's gonna be fun~

System Metternich posted:

Why is it always the marines when you want to underscore how totally broken badass someone is? I never see anyone going “my dad is in the army, he'll gently caress you up“ in this kind of stories

RNG posted:

Haha. Troper witnesses his drunk uncle hitting on someone's boyfriend and completely misunderstands.

Tired Moritz posted:

Barbeque sauce? How threatening

Khazar-khum posted:

It is if they plan on actually grilling. If they've got a pit full of charcoal and foil, well, what can I say

West007 posted:

All troper tales are so poorly written I can't understand what the gently caress the author is trying to say anyway.

Quote-Unquote posted:

I don't understand the need to refer to themselves in the third person, and their inability to convey which person in the story 'he' or 'she' is actually referring to (is it the author, or one of the fictitious characters?) means I have to read each sentence multiple times in order to get even a basic idea of what's going on. And then I give up. It's amongst the worst creative writing I've ever read.