Fantasy Football 2016: There is no god. Existence is a joke

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Armchair Quarterback > Fantasy Football 2016: There is no god. Existence is a joke

«‹›327 »

pubic works project: Jan 28, 2005; No Decepticon in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.

I've clinched a playoff berth. I need to win this week to get a first round bye or have the guy in 3rd lose.

Edit: Just looked it up and 1st and 3rd play each other this week. So if I win I will be the #1 seed if the current guy in 1st loses.

pubic works project fucked around with this message at 17:49 on Nov 29, 2016

# ? Nov 29, 2016 17:44

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 28, 2024 09:06

Doltos: Dec 28, 2005; 🤌🤌🤌

dxt posted:

I am the most average team in one of my leagues, a 6-6 record and according to yahoo I'd be 54-54 if I played every team every week.

You'd be a welcome addition in my league where 10 out of the 14 teams are 6-6. Same thing happened last year, too.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 18:43

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Doltos posted:

You'd be a welcome addition in my league where 10 out of the 14 teams are 6-6. Same thing happened last year, too.

In my 12-team work league the top three teams are 9-3, the next three are 6-6, and the next four are 5-7.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 18:47

Docjowles: Apr 9, 2009

I've never played in a work league without one or two afk idiots who go like 3-10.

They also, without fail, exceed their weekly point average by 90 the one time I play them while being a free W for everyone else :mad:

# ? Nov 29, 2016 19:00

Buane: Nov 28, 2005; When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll

If you play Fantasy Football to prove your sports knowledge or assert your dominant intellect and sense of strategy, you are a dumb idiot baby.

If you play Fantasy Football to have some generally harmless fun by socializing through pop culture, or as a way to squeeze some week-to-week entertainment out of the dumbest and most joyless organized sport in the world, then you are smart and cool like me.

Possibly related: I am 9-3 this year and have clinched a first-round bye, as well as holding an insurmountable lead on most points for the season.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 20:33

Beer4TheBeerGod: Aug 23, 2004; Exciting Lemon

Six of the ten teams in my family league are 6-6.

I'm 10-2. :smug:

# ? Nov 29, 2016 21:04

Ches Neckbeard: Dec 3, 2005; You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Buane posted:

If you play Fantasy Football to prove your sports knowledge or assert your dominant intellect and sense of strategy, you are a dumb idiot baby.

If you play Fantasy Football to have some generally harmless fun by socializing through pop culture, or as a way to squeeze some week-to-week entertainment out of the dumbest and most joyless organized sport in the world, then you are smart and cool like me.

Possibly related: I am 9-3 this year and have clinched a first-round bye, as well as holding an insurmountable lead on most points for the season.

My best team is an auto draft. This man is correct.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 21:18

Inspector_666: Oct 7, 2003; _{benny with the good hair}

Ches Neckbeard posted:

My best team is an auto draft. This man is correct.

The 3rd place team in my work league auto-drafted and has made one move all year, which was to trade me Bilal Powell for Cole Beasley. I dropped Powell within 2 weeks and she's never actually taken Beasley off her bench.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 21:28

Diqnol: May 10, 2010

Buane posted:

If you play Fantasy Football to prove your sports knowledge or assert your dominant intellect and sense of strategy, you are a dumb idiot baby.

If you play Fantasy Football to have some generally harmless fun by socializing through pop culture, or as a way to squeeze some week-to-week entertainment out of the dumbest and most joyless organized sport in the world, then you are smart and cool like me.

Possibly related: I am 9-3 this year and have clinched a first-round bye, as well as holding an insurmountable lead on most points for the season.

If you play it to make money and do, well, you're better than Buane.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 21:29

Buane: Nov 28, 2005; When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll

Cheap Trick souvenirs posted:

If you play it to make money and do, well, you're better than Buane.

The number of things you could do to make money that would allow you to exploit a better edge than you have in Fantasy Football...let's just say there are a lot of them.

The true spirit of Fantasy Football is watching a bunch of football games at a bar each week with good food and good drinks and hoping you win your game, and once that's no longer possible finding the league member you hate the most and hoping they lose in the most crushing way possible. :911:

# ? Nov 29, 2016 21:57

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Buane posted:

The number of things you could do to make money that would allow you to exploit a better edge than you have in Fantasy Football...let's just say there are a lot of them.

The true spirit of Fantasy Football is watching a bunch of football games at a bar each week with good food and good drinks and hoping you win your game, and once that's no longer possible finding the league member you hate the most and hoping they lose in the most crushing way possible.

Sorry but the true spirit is mocking CMike and Jared Cook truthers

# ? Nov 29, 2016 22:09

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

the true spirit is looking into the void and seeing tortured screaming misery staring back at you

# ? Nov 29, 2016 23:13

Rick Grimes: Oct 12, 2005; We Are The Walking Dead

VietCampo posted:

If any of the players involved were in the starting lineup for any of the thanksgiving games, the trade processing would be pushed back til the following week. This would of course give the league a whole extra week to veto.

If not then I'd take a closer look at the trading rules and/or see if any were changed recently on the main league page.

Ahh, I didn't know that about ESPN settings, thanks.

Though, now I get to play Ruxpin and accuse people of collusion. :argh:

My one co-worker that brought me into the league goes "Hey, heads up, Commish (1st place) and 3rd place texted me yesterday and asked me to veto that trade Monday. Because 'He's in the playoff hunt, and we can't have him getting a boost'"

Ended up being vetoed with 5 votes, even though it had been 2-2 from thurs night until late yesterday. :siren:

And before it's asked, it was almost exactly the same trade mentioned a few pages back, with a small tweak.

Give: DT + Melvin Gordon
Get: ODB + Yeldon

Please, veto me for a lopsided player dump, but not because "His team is good already" :argh:

This is why my league has no trade veto, unless something's really hosed.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 23:16

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Rick Grimes posted:

"Hey, heads up, Commish (1st place) and 3rd place texted me yesterday and asked me to veto that trade Monday. Because 'He's in the playoff hunt, and we can't have him getting a boost'"

quit this league

# ? Nov 29, 2016 23:17

Rick Grimes: Oct 12, 2005; We Are The Walking Dead

Teemu Pokemon posted:

quit this league

Yeah, I'm gonna finish out the year (currently 2nd), hopefully take their money and walk.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 23:22

MacheteZombie: Feb 4, 2007

Rick Grimes posted:

Yeah, I'm gonna finish out the year (currently 2nd), hopefully take their money and walk.

Make sure to let the league know that they're failures at fantasy football on the way out.

# ? Nov 29, 2016 23:25

MakaVillian: Aug 16, 2003; Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

So I have a question about Tyreek Hill in a 12-team half ppr league. Here's my team along with my faab bids for this week:

Is it worth dropping any of Dion Lewis, Fuller or Tevin Coleman for Hill and possibly losing them on waivers/free agency?

MakaVillian fucked around with this message at 00:07 on Nov 30, 2016

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:02

Quarterroys: Jul 1, 2008

MakaVillian posted:

So I have a question about Tyreek Hill in a 12-team half ppr league. Here's my team along with my faab bids for this week:

Is it worth dropping any of Dion Lewis, Fuller or Tevin Coleman for Hill and possibly losing them on waivers/free agency?

Cut Will Fuller for Tyreek the Freak

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:13

RBX: Jan 2, 2011

Fuller has been droppable for weeks (along with Hopkins :colbert:

). Especially for Hill.

I need a stream for Mariota this week should i get Kaep, Fitz, or....Barkley?

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:17

MakaVillian: Aug 16, 2003; Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

Yeah Fuller was my first thought too. I hate that I traded a 3rd rounder for him.

Thanks

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:24

Quarterroys: Jul 1, 2008

RBX posted:

Fuller has been droppable for weeks (along with Hopkins ). Especially for Hill.

I need a stream for Mariota this week should i get Kaep, Fitz, or....Barkley?

Kaep vs Bears by a mile

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:24

Quarterroys: Jul 1, 2008

MakaVillian posted:

Yeah Fuller was my first thought too. I hate that I traded a 3rd rounder for him.

Thanks

Wait is this Dynasty? Keep Fuller if so

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:25

sourdough: Apr 30, 2012

Cervixalot posted:

Wait is this Dynasty? Keep Fuller if so

This x1000

# ? Nov 30, 2016 00:26

SouthShoreSamurai: Apr 28, 2009; It is a tale,
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.; Fun Shoe

Buane posted:

The number of things you could do to make money that would allow you to exploit a better edge than you have in Fantasy Football...let's just say there are a lot of them.

The true spirit of Fantasy Football is watching a bunch of football games at a bar each week with good food and good drinks and hoping you win your game, and once that's no longer possible finding the league member you hate the most and hoping they lose in the most crushing way possible.

Spoeank posted:

Sorry but the true spirit is mocking CMike and Jared Cook truthers

These are both true and not at all mutually exclusive.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:01

MakaVillian: Aug 16, 2003; Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

Cervixalot posted:

Wait is this Dynasty? Keep Fuller if so

Keeper league with 3 keepers that cost rounds 14-16. I think Fuller might have the best chance to be available on waivers out of those three though.yy

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:17

MakaVillian: Aug 16, 2003; Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

RBX posted:

Fuller has been droppable for weeks (along with Hopkins ). Especially for Hill.

I need a stream for Mariota this week should i get Kaep, Fitz, or....Barkley?

Kaep for sure, he's starting to become a legit QB1

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:20

Sataere: Jul 20, 2005; Step 1: Start fight
Step 2: Attack straw man
Step 3: REPEAT

Do not engage with me

MakaVillian posted:

Keeper league with 3 keepers that cost rounds 14-16. I think Fuller might have the best chance to be available on waivers out of those three though.yy

Please clarify. Can anyone be kept in those rounds, or only players drafted there or lower. This question is dependent on the keeper rules and your projected keepers for next year.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:22

Leperflesh: May 17, 2007

The true spirits of Fantasy:

The Ghost of Fantasy Past, who visits to show you how happy you were right after your draft, when all of your promising young players were healthy and going to be great, and your idiot opponents had blown their picks on dumb bad jerks
The Ghost of Fantasy Present, who shows you the tattered remnants of that once-promising crew; the players on IR, the players you traded away or dropped right before they suddenly got good, the players you're agonizing over whether to start or not because they got 18 points two weeks ago but only 4 last week, and your 6-7 record that you could still theoretically get you to the playoffs if you win the next two games and five other teams lose their games
The Ghost of Fantasy Future, who shows you a vision of where this is all going... you're in twelve leagues, you spend 7.5 of your 8 working hours every day loving around on fantasy websites instead of doing your job, you have and can elaborately defend an opinion on more than two dozen different fantasy football online commentators, you listen to fantasy football podcasts during your grinding commute. Nobody will watch football with you any more because they can't stand how you insist on watching 8 games simultaneously every Sunday, scream at the TV whenever your IDP guy gets held without drawing a flag, and won't shut the gently caress up about fantasy loving football for ten minutes when they're trying to have a conversation with you about any goddamn thing else. You're playing daily fantasy for real money that you actually kind of need to pay the mortgage next month, you're making spreadsheets to print out so you can track all your guys every week while watching all the games, and you're seriously considering starting to attend college games just to scout out draft picks for next year, even though you hate college ball.

It's not too late, goons. You can still change. The dark vision of the future is still unfixed... you can still quit whenever you want, buy a big turkey for tiny tim, and prove to your girl that you're still interested in going outside (and not to the game, just like... a hike or whatever), listening to the radio (not talk radio about football, but like... music), doing your goddamn job at work and earning promotions and raises, having friends, and being happy and well-adjusted.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:32

pmchem: Jan 22, 2010

Well played.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 01:44

ColdBlooded: Jul 15, 2001; Ask me how to run a good team into the ground.

Would it be considered a dick move to place waiver claims for Rivers and Kap in order to try and block my upcoming opponent from picking both of them up?
They're by far the best QBs available and he has Mariota on bye this week with no other QBs on the roster. I have Brady as my QB, so he'll be starting for me regardless. (unless his knee flares up I guess)

If I don't win this week, I likely miss the playoffs (thanks Brandin Cooks). $20 entry to the league and it's myself and 9 friends so it's not super serious or anything, but still a decent payout to win and I have a good enough team to win in the playoffs should I get there.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:21

Swarmin Swedes: Oct 22, 2008

ColdBlooded posted:

Would it be considered a dick move to place waiver claims for Rivers and Kap in order to try and block my upcoming opponent from picking both of them up?
They're by far the best QBs available and he has Mariota on bye this week with no other QBs on the roster. I have Brady as my QB, so he'll be starting for me regardless. (unless his knee flares up I guess)

If I don't win this week, I likely miss the playoffs (thanks Brandin Cooks). $20 entry to the league and it's myself and 9 friends so it's not super serious or anything, but still a decent payout to win and I have a good enough team to win in the playoffs should I get there.

Do it.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:25

sourdough: Apr 30, 2012

ColdBlooded posted:

Would it be considered a dick move to place waiver claims for Rivers and Kap in order to try and block my upcoming opponent from picking both of them up?
They're by far the best QBs available and he has Mariota on bye this week with no other QBs on the roster. I have Brady as my QB, so he'll be starting for me regardless. (unless his knee flares up I guess)

If I don't win this week, I likely miss the playoffs (thanks Brandin Cooks). $20 entry to the league and it's myself and 9 friends so it's not super serious or anything, but still a decent payout to win and I have a good enough team to win in the playoffs should I get there.

Of course that's not a dick move, that's a smart move. Go for it.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:28

Matt Zerella: Oct 7, 2002; Norris'es are back baby. It's good again. Awoouu (fox Howl)

Unless it's codified in league rules, go for it. This applies to all situations.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:29

ColdBlooded: Jul 15, 2001; Ask me how to run a good team into the ground.

Thanks for the feedback guys, just placed claims for both of them.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:45

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

My friend is in a league and is fighting for a playoff spot with a guy who is streaming QB

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:49

Popero: Apr 17, 2001; .406/.553/.735

Extremely fair play.

Prioritize Derrick Henry or Charles Sims for a claim this week for the playoffs? I have Martin in this league if it matters.

Henry is the better back overall and there have been rumblings about expanding his role, but he's a handcuff for the most part. Sims has a role when active no matter what and has a good schedule, but he has been hurt and is lower ceiling probably.

Only have room for one, and I may not get the one I want more, but I'm not sure. I'm leaning Henry as an upside play.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:52

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

MakaVillian posted:

Kaep for sure, he's starting to become a legit QB1

Kaepernick has been a legit QB1 from basically the moment he took over for Gabbert. I've been writing this literally for weeks.

For weeks I tells ya! And now that Matt Stafford sucks he's the perfect replacement for dumb idiots who listened to me in the first place.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:54

Matt Zerella: Oct 7, 2002; Norris'es are back baby. It's good again. Awoouu (fox Howl)

Teemu Pokemon posted:

My friend is in a league and is fighting for a playoff spot with a guy who is streaming QB

This owns

# ? Nov 30, 2016 02:56

pubic works project: Jan 28, 2005; No Decepticon in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.

Best defense streaming options for the week? I'm not really keen on playing the Vikes against Zeke and Dak.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 04:28

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 28, 2024 09:06

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Heads up for your Dakssksks this week:

Minnesota is the only team in the league to not allow a single 19 fantasy point QB this season.

# ? Nov 30, 2016 06:13

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Armchair Quarterback > Fantasy Football 2016: There is no god. Existence is a joke

«‹›327 »