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i want a fetish bed that will fold in on itself so when i got to sleep at night i can pretend i am being eaten alive by a giant anime woman
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Dec 14, 2016 05:04
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I had a dream wherin the latest Magic expansion was based on loving MEGAZORDS
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Dec 14, 2016 05:29
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Solice Kirsk posted:Maybe Dr. Thurston's Revitalizing Mind Tincture would work better. Restore balance to the humors and reinvigorate his mental sharpness and acuity. You need Grove's Medicated Chill Tonic, friend!
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Dec 14, 2016 05:32
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Sjs00 posted:I had a dream wherin the latest Magic expansion was based on loving MEGAZORDS Best dream ever  Cheating dude: your family thinks you're a piece of poo poo too
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Dec 14, 2016 05:45
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I had this one dream one time, it was where I poo poo my pants. Like, i just poo poo them, poo poo right in my pants. Guys.... I dreamed I poo poo my pants. Only it wasn't A DREAMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Dec 14, 2016 05:47
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I had those "punching but it just doesn't work" dreams, too. But then I tried kicking instead and that worked just fine. Then I got so into kicking the nightmare about trying to fight off a horror movie monster with useless punches changed into a dream about kicking stuff and doing flips. I think it has something to do with brains and science. Next time you're in a dream fight, just make like a French sailor and start kicking.
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Dec 14, 2016 08:40
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Jumping on the "fighting but weak-rear end" bandwagon ... Also, I've been training MMA and BJJ for the last 10 years, so it's pretty frustrating.
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Dec 14, 2016 08:55
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_nDdoJX1KxM True story
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Dec 14, 2016 09:00
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SciFiDownBeat posted:If a woman came on to me I'd probably tell my wife about it later... Get a load of captain naive over here.
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Dec 14, 2016 09:21
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sixth and maimed posted:Jumping on the "fighting but weak-rear end" bandwagon ... Also, I've been training MMA and BJJ for the last 10 years, so it's pretty frustrating. blow job judo?
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Dec 14, 2016 12:13
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Putty posted:i want a fetish bed that will fold in on itself so when i got to sleep at night i can pretend i am being eaten alive by a giant Anime? What are you, a filthy knuckle-dragger?
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Dec 14, 2016 12:17
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Putty posted:i want a fetish bed that will fold in on itself so when i got to sleep at night i can pretend i am being eaten alive by a giant anime woman For just a few thousand dollars you can! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCSyKQ5WvaE
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Dec 14, 2016 15:53
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you irl posted:blow job judo? Excuse me its blow job jitsu
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Dec 14, 2016 16:09
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Apprentice Dick posted:Excuse me its blow job jitsu What is "the title of my next Naruto fanfiction", Alex quote:My wife is really pissed at me for something that I think is genius. Pissed to the point of us now discussing divorce. Really I'm more curious what goons think so I can tell her "I'm not the only one who agrees with this" This is literally a post from the r/relationships thread. Do not charge your relatives for Christmas. That is crazy. If the cost of the food is getting out of control, ask them to each contribute a dish. This is normal and will solve your problem just as well with the added bonus of not making the holidays into a business transaction. I'm 100% Team Anon's Wife on this one. Apologize to her and figure something else out.  quote:My wife and I got married just after college. We met in our sophomore and junior year. We both got relatively decent jobs in a major city and have had a comfortable life up until recently. My wife has had very few relationships before she met me and was quite shy during college and when we first started dating. yes Open relationships never work, but a surefire way to tell a specific one isn't working is if there is functionally no difference between it and an affair. Your wife is checked out of your marriage and will either leave you for this other guy or leave you for the next guy she starts dating when she gets bored with him. Now, you did technically agree to this. But there's no law saying you can't change your mind. Tell your wife you can't handle the open marriage. Say you thought you could, but you can't, and you have no interest in anyone but her and it kills you when she's out with this other dude. This is the truth, so you shouldn't have a problem saying it. You need to close the marriage back up; tell her so. If she gives you any resistance at all, that's a deal-breaker because it's basically proof that she doesn't really want to be married to you, she wants to be single and play the field; give her her chance to do that by kicking her to the curb. If she agrees and apologizes and changes her ways, well, whether you trust her going forward from here is on you -- I don't know either of you from Adam after all -- but I'd keep my guard up at the very least. e: oh also she should quit her job, she's making GBS threads where she eats and it's a bad idea regardless of relationship status but also I think she'll keep cheating if she keeps working there loquacius fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Dec 14, 2016 |
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Dec 14, 2016 16:23
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You make $210,000 a year between the two of you and you want to charge your FAMILY to stay over your house for one night? You are a selfish idiot. Tell your goony magic friends to get a cab home.
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Dec 14, 2016 16:27
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RCarr posted:You make $210,000 a year between the two of you and you want to charge your FAMILY to stay over your house for one night? I love how he complains that his wife isn't being fiscally responsible right after telling us he plays MTG competitively and travels 4-5 times a year to go to cons. Also MTG goon posted:My cards are going to be a long term investment and said any potential kids to college, so we're good there.  If you can't figure out how to afford Christmas dinner for your family on 210k a year with no kids, you are a loving moron and I have no sympathy for you.
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Dec 14, 2016 16:55
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Don't charge people to come to a Christmas dinner that you're hosting you cheap-rear end dork.
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Dec 14, 2016 16:55
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lmao, that guy is gonna lose his wife over Magic and being a cheap piece of poo poo
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Dec 14, 2016 16:57
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Magic goon has dreams of his Christmas sleepover where they open all the packs from their stockings and have a basement draft. And his dumb 'family' is getting in the way of that.
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Dec 14, 2016 16:58
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MTG goon: you're really disrespectful in the way you write about your wife, clearly think quite little of her and I hope she divorces your stupid rear end. If you want to keep this marriage going, you're going to have to scoop 'em up and do some serious apologising. You're dead on board, mate. E: also lol point 1 slide 1 on the TED talk for "how to gently caress up your perfectly decent relationship" reads "open it up" mfcrocker fucked around with this message at 17:00 on Dec 14, 2016 |
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Dec 14, 2016 16:58
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Xmas hotelier, you are an idiot and your wife is right. If you can't afford to host Christmas then you shouldn't have agreed to it. If you need some financial help, ask them to help with the food. Charging relatives to stay at your house is a total dick move and a good way to make sure no one wants to come to your house or invite you to theirs ever again. Also if you are making 200k a year and a few hundred bucks is that important to you then you are doing something seriously wrong.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:00
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Charging friends or even friends of friends to stay at your place (as long as it's a reasonable amount of time) is ridiculous, let alone family. If they are staying a while and eating your food just ask them to chip in for groceries. You're like one of my former roommates who tried setting up a bring your own beer party with a "door fee" and guess what, hardly anybody came and nobody thought he was serious about the door fee because charging money for being allowed to enter your house temporarily is something only assholes do.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:04
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as a female human being i think magic goon should be thankful his wife hasn't killed him(yet)
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Dec 14, 2016 17:07
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Open marriage goon: the most predictable ending. Your wife is loving another dude. She asked for this open marriage because she wanted to gently caress this guy, or maybe was already doing it and felt bad about it. You have one shot to save your marriage, which is to put a stop to it and close it. It's probably not going to work and your marriage is probably over. You need to be prepared for that. If it makes you feel better, the marriage was over when she decided she wanted to sleep with other people, so whether you agreed to it or not doesn't really matter.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:07
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quote:My wife is cooking a very traditional meal; Ham, Turkey, Stuffing, Mashed Potatoes, Gravy, some kind of veggie, and a variety of cakes and pies. Nothing she can't handle - except the cost is getting out of control. How the hell is this out of control? My wife and I made this exact dinner for roughly the same amount of people 3 weeks ago for Thanksgiving for about 100$, and everyone left with leftovers.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:08
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Arven posted:How the hell is this out of control? My wife and I made this exact dinner for roughly the same amount of people 3 weeks ago for Thanksgiving for about 100$, and everyone left with leftovers. Maybe every item has its own custom Magic deck.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:09
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therattle posted:Maybe every item has its own custom Magic deck. The napkins are Alpha Black Lotuses
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Dec 14, 2016 17:16
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That cheap rear end Christmas goon is Komodo Wagon, right?
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Dec 14, 2016 17:17
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devils advocate here: ignore the haters, magic goon, you are doing what's best to ensure you stay competitive in the magic scene and provide for your children's futures. double-down. your wife will come around.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:17
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Captain Yossarian posted:That cheap rear end Christmas goon is Komodo Wagon, right? lol like he'd let family stay over on christmas even for money
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Dec 14, 2016 17:17
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haha I forgot this idiot thinks he's still getting kids too you're gonna die alone surrounded by cardboard, good job
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Dec 14, 2016 17:18
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cucked goon: lol. just lol. tell your wife you're done with the open relationship poo poo, and see whether she chooses you or the other (bigger dicked) guy.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:18
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They're not making goat cheese stuffed bacon wrapped dates so I'm declaring their Xmas party fiasco and shan't be attending. Good day, anon goon. GOOD. DAY.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:25
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I'm starting to think the Christmas Party thing is a bit more transparent of a trollpost than I did before, because (a) it is very similar to a story posted in the r/relationships thread recently and (b) the parts about Magic cards and the part at the end about "I should be enjoying hot chocolate while my wife bakes me some cookies" were a little on-the-nose
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Dec 14, 2016 17:30
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Jose posted:lol like he'd let family stay over on christmas even for money Ahahaha good point 
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Dec 14, 2016 17:34
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loquacius posted:I'm starting to think the Christmas Party thing is a bit more transparent of a trollpost than I did before, because (a) it is very similar to a story posted in the r/relationships thread recently and (b) the parts about Magic cards and the part at the end about "I should be enjoying hot chocolate while my wife bakes me some cookies" were a little on-the-nose Pfft, there's been maybe three real confessions in the entire thread. And I choose to believe they were the guy that hooked up with his weird PhD boss, the dude that wrote that 4 page love letter, and obviously the guy that tortures monkeys.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:36
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loquacius posted:I'm starting to think the Christmas Party thing is a bit more transparent of a trollpost than I did before, because (a) it is very similar to a story posted in the r/relationships thread recently and (b) the parts about Magic cards and the part at the end about "I should be enjoying hot chocolate while my wife bakes me some cookies" were a little on-the-nose It's so blatantly a trollpost I'm amazed you didn't pick up on it sooner. Like, no one is that much of a clueless, selfish wasteman. No one. I refuse to believe it. Part of me does want to be real though, if only for the wife to follow through, divorce his worthless arse and take him to the cleaners.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:42
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Loquacious is doing good work but his filter is basically non-existent.
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Dec 14, 2016 17:55
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loquacius posted:I'm starting to think the Christmas Party thing is a bit more transparent of a trollpost than I did before, because (a) it is very similar to a story posted in the r/relationships thread recently and (b) the parts about Magic cards and the part at the end about "I should be enjoying hot chocolate while my wife bakes me some cookies" were a little on-the-nose It's an obvious troll.
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Dec 14, 2016 18:01
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There shouldn't be a filter except for the silly ones about mods or Lowtax that wind up getting the thread closed. If a goon wants to write a terrible fan-fic about liking Goku enough to have his wife dress up like him while she pegs him then, by god, loquacious will post it for all to see.
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Dec 14, 2016 18:01
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