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Krunge posted:Wonder how it would have gone without the trance. When I re-ran it, the Raymondsters won, 3-1, but the tipping point was Jazz's attack on One of Heygals Guys actually took the latter out of the fight. It was basically the same move, just it worked. The dwarf was not actually the meaningful one in this fight!
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Dec 26, 2016 00:01
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| # ? May 26, 2024 17:17 |
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Nonsense.
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Dec 26, 2016 01:46
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There's only a few hours left for you to run another fight this fine day, so that we may learn that Christmas is, indeed, canceled!
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Dec 26, 2016 04:09
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Maybe the fight is still going.
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Dec 26, 2016 04:13
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I'm glad I didn't see the fight was going to go because I totally would have bet against Bad Munki's team.
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Dec 26, 2016 04:19
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 Round 2, Fight 3  Christmas is Canceled (1-0) is on the left side of the arena. THE ENTIRE BEE MOVIE SCRIPT (jon joe) is a female soldier ant woman. She wields a copper spear and two wooden spears and wears a leather cap. Minos Jr (Maarak) is a male minotaur. He wields a copper war hammer and wears a copper cap, an iron mail shirt, and iron gauntlets. Karl Barx (The Mattybee) is a male werewolf. He is empty handed and wears an iron helm, an iron mail shirt, iron leggings, iron gauntlets, and iron low boots. Puffier Areolas (1-0) is on the right side of the arena. Buttdork the Second (Frozen_Flame) is a female tigerman. She is empty handed and wears a steel helm. Asclepius' Rod (Mygna) is a male serpent man. He wields a bronze spear and wears a bronze mail shirt. Jareth (titty_baby_) is a male goblin. He wields an iron spear and a wooden buckler and wears a leather cap and a copper mail shirt.  Christmas is Canceled is a 1.21 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 2500.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 2064.00 dwarfbucks for Puffier Areolas. It's Christmas evening. If it's not time to cancel this drat holiday, we'll miss our chance until next year. Not that I'm biased, but go Christmas-cancelers!  Well, they certainly run fast, at any rate. Karl takes a swing at Jareth, but the goblin nimbly dodges. Rod's bronze spear fails to penetrate Jr's iron armor. THE is the first to draw blood; a glancing blow breaks the skin on Buttdork. Ohh, that's no good. That was one of the wooden spears. Jr is more effective; he lowers the hammer on Buttdork, and her arm bends about ninety degrees halfway between the wrist and elbow.  Jumpy Jareth has managed to get himself clear through Christmas lines. Buttdork, flanked, lashes out with claws and digs deep into the meat on THE's arm. No spear is dropped, so that was probably the spare arm, that's not holding a spear. THE counters by putting a length of oak wood through his lung, even as Jr on the other side bends the kitty's shin about as badly as the arm. Unsurprisingly, the tiger is out.  Karl plays interference, holding back the other two so his teammates can land a kill. Rod tries to dart past, but the werewolf was ready for him. Claws miss his vitals, but the snake loses a finger. Distracted, Rod fails to follow through against THE, and turns back to Karl. Karl grabs his spear. Rod lets him have it. Directly in the liver. Karl is bigger, stronger, and meaner, though. The wolfman leans over, and bites Rod in the head. The snake is knocked unconscious by the bite, and so he lets the spear go. 'gently caress you snake supremacists' is the lesson you should take away from this. Karl bites the snake's head more firmly, then clamps his mighty hands around the snake's wrist. My god, is he planning to pull the snake apart? No, he just twists the wrist through a full three hundred sixty degrees. That's not much kinder. His teammates are doing worse to Buttdork, who has barely an unperforated organ to her name. And Jareth is helpless to prevent it, barely even annoying Karl with his bruises.  Karl tires of his toy. He grabs at the goblin's head, instead, his headlong leap sending Jareth sprawling backwards, stunned, his cap gripped by the fearsome were-beast. Jareth stands up, takes two wild swings at the monster, then finds teeth sunk into his shin. He misses a third time. Another Karl bite is blunted by copper armor. Again, though, the goblin is knocked away, and grimly he stands up. Karl grabs one leg, bites the other, and worries the last resisting foe. Ligaments, nerves, tendons, muscles, arteries and bones all cry out. Jareth is not out of it yet! His teammates are also still alive, and Rod hasn't been attacked for a while. It's not unheard of for an ignored warrior to pull themselves together and get back in the fight. Jareth puts all his remaining strength into a thrust straight at Karl's ferocious eyes.  No good. He has one of his legs pulled from its socket. Jareth stabs straight at his foe's heart. Iron skids across iron, but the force bruises Karl's black heart.  Buttdork, though... holy Armok. Let her die. She's been incredible as an insensate tank, but... that's enough. You can go, now. Jareth stabs Karl in the neck. Also no good. His shield is blocking the worst of it, but Juggernaut is still coming for him. Or... not. Satisfied, the next time Jareth rolls away, Karl turns back to Rod, and grabs the snake by the throat. Jareth begins charging up from behind him. Sneak attacks do seem to have a bonus; can he do it yet?  No. Fingers of iron kill the snake. Karl turns to Buttdork. And, um, doesn't kill immediatey.  Is... is Buttdork going to seriously facetank the entire team long enough for Jareth to kill them? Her limp body absorbs more abuse.  And more, and more, and more. Finally, Jr smashes her rib cage hard enough that her extremities sort of disconnect. Jareth is here now, though. She lines up behind Karl... and punches him. Iron helm deflects the blow completely.  Christmas crowds around the goblin. No more merriment. No more joy. It's time for you to die. Jr knocks him about the ear. THE stabs him so ferociously that he's stunned. Jareth drops. Brutality ensues. Jr flattens his head for the kill. Kills Minos Jr: 2 Karl Barx: 1 Combat Log gently caress you, Christmas. gently caress you.
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Dec 26, 2016 06:00
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gently caress Christmas, gently caress snakes, and to all a happy new year!
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Dec 26, 2016 06:04
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Wow that was kind of horrifying
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Dec 26, 2016 06:05
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Snakes are a threat to the glorious workers' revolwooftion.
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Dec 26, 2016 06:11
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God drat it Christmas why 
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Dec 26, 2016 08:23
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quote:Jareth (Puffier Areolas): Death... This is truly horrifying.
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Dec 26, 2016 18:46
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I think my strategy of 'buy all the skills except spears' isn't really working
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Dec 26, 2016 19:22
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titty_baby_ posted:I think my strategy of 'buy all the skills except spears' isn't really working Weapon skill is extremely important. I look forward to our eventual fight.
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Dec 26, 2016 19:56
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Your lack of blood disturbs me.
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Dec 29, 2016 17:49
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Where are all the fights at.
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Jan 2, 2017 00:54
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End of year, huge budget dumps, and a flu that put me down hard for about 48hrs. Perfect storm for no fights. No excuses for the other guys though. They are just slackers.
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Jan 2, 2017 00:58
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I like to savor the anticipation. I have real reasons, too, but I'm loving lazy.
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Jan 2, 2017 02:09
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Round 2, Fight 4 Mafia Hit Squad (0-1) is on the left side of the arena. KKKKCCCCHHHHH!!! (Zwingley) is a female dark gnome. She wields a steel large dagger and wears no armor. Buddy (iLonie) is a male elf. He wields a steel long sword and wears a leather cap and leather gauntlets. Natural Causes (AecTalek) is a male yeti. He is empty handed and wears an iron helm, a copper mail shirt, copper greaves, copper gauntlets, and copper high boots. Puffy Areolas (0-1) is on the right side of the arena. Pepperoni (synthorange) is a female werewolf. She wields a bronze halberd and wears a bronze helm, leather armor, a bronze mail shirt, leather leggings, leather gauntlets, and leather high boots. Alt-right hook (Afriscipio) is a male troll. He is empty handed and wears an iron cap, leather armor, iron gauntlets, and leather low boots. Popopo (GreyPowerVan) is a male strangler. He wields an iron spear and a wooden shield and wears an iron helm.  Puffy Areolas is a 1.17 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 611.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 523.00 dwarfbucks for Mafia Hit Squad.  Puffy Areolas on the right has a pretty huge size advantage.  The fighters clash and Popopo wastes no time shoving his iron spear into Natural Causes chest. The yeti's heart and lungs are torn, arteries are ripped, and immense pain causes Natural Causes to pass out.  It's not all fun and games for Puffy Areolas though. Buddy the elf swords Pepperoni in the left arm which causes pain and chops tendons while KKKCCCHHH puts her dagger into the werewolfs leg. Pepperoni falls to the floor bleeding heavily. Things are just about even still!  Alt-Right Hook arrives and sees his wolf buddy on the floor. He simply grabs KKKCCHHHH and throws the little guy behind him like so much trash. Popopo changes targets and thrusts his spear into Buddy's stomach. Buddy doubles over the embedded weapon and Pepperoni slashes the elf from the floor. Buddy gives in to pain. Things are not so even anymore.  Pepperoni chops off Buddy's head and KKKCCHHHH lands on the rock floor and bruises his spleen while sliding another few feet.  Pepperoni and Popopo break through the yeti's helm, and then Popopo splits Natural Causes head in two with a well placed spear. KKKKCCCHHHH comes to a halt and stands on wobbly legs.  That's a gently caress of a thing to see when getting to your feet. While still seeing double. After being tossed fifteen feet.  The troll Alt-Right Hook is the first to arrive and he does a judo takedown that Royce Gracie would be proud of. The rest of Puffy Areolas arrive and torture KKKCCCHHH for a bit before Popopo kills him. Puffy Areolas wins with a dominating 3-0 performance. Kills: Popopo: 2 Pepperoni: 1 Combat Log 
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Jan 5, 2017 15:03
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quote:Pepperoni_PUFF stabs KKKCCCHHH_HIT in the fifth toe, right foot with her bronze halberd, shattering the nail! This little piggy isnt going anywhere!
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Jan 5, 2017 15:16
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Please, sir, may I have another?
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Jan 5, 2017 18:43
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Wow, nothing but 3-0 routs so far this round.
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Jan 5, 2017 18:58
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That was one sided
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Jan 5, 2017 21:57
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Krunge posted:Please, sir, may I have another? Apparently not today. Sorry. 
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Jan 6, 2017 01:56
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Spermy Smurf posted:Apparently not today. Sorry. :in extremely ian malcom voice: "excuse me are there actually FIGHTS in the dwarf fortress arena challenge thread?"
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Jan 8, 2017 00:29
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No no, we're civilized folk, we talk through our problems. For instance, one might say, "Yo where the gently caress the commissioners at, I need some god damned fights"
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Jan 8, 2017 00:33
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Its the weekend leave me alone.
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Jan 8, 2017 00:55
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Wait, fights? I thought this was the Dwarf Fortress Read A Book Together Challenge. Where are the goddamn bedtime stories?
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Jan 8, 2017 03:16
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By the big red barn in the great green field there was a pink pig who was learning to squeal. There is a great big horse and a very little horse and on every barn is a weather vane of course - a golden flying horse. There was a big pile of hay and a little pile of hay.... I just realized I know the entire book by heart. Thanks for making me feel older than I did ten minutes ago. gently caress. Edit: Apparently I also know 'Bear Stays Up' and 'Bear Snores On' from memory. I used to remember important things. Spermy Smurf fucked around with this message at 03:52 on Jan 8, 2017 |
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Jan 8, 2017 03:50
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Round 2, Fight 6 Spermy is a really bad commissioner (0-1) is on the left side of the arena. Yer Tie (Pickled Tink) is a female yeti. She is empty handed and wears a copper helm and leather leggings. SECRETLY MADE ONLY OF SPIDERS (ZeeToo) is a male minotaur. He wields a copper spear and a wooden shield and wears no armor. Pierre Tanoy the Tree Cutter (Fermata) is a male elf. He wields a copper pick and a copper shield and wears an iron cap, an iron mail shirt, leather leggings, silver gauntlets, and leather high boots. Bad Munki's Team (1-0) is on the right side of the arena. Spermy Smurf (Coward) is a male serpent man. He is empty handed and wears a copper helm, leather armor, an iron mail shirt, iron gauntlets, and iron high boots. Keith Vaz (Dirty Frank) is a male tigerman. He wields a steel long sword and wears leather armor. 2016 (goatface) is a male dwarf. He wields a silver maul and wears an iron helm, leather armor, an iron mail shirt, iron gauntlets, and iron high boots.  Spermy is a really bad commissioner is a 3.30 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 861.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 261.00 dwarfbucks for Bad Munki's Team.  This isn't a high betting match. The sizes are in favor of the Spermy Bad Commish on the left.  The fighters clash and 2016's huge maul slams down and scratches the skin on Pierres toe. It bleeds everywhere. That was underwhelming.  The second clash of weapons is far more impressive than the first. Spermy Smurf bites the minotaur Spiders and injects paralyzing venom into him. At the exact same time Yer Tie runs forward and takes a slash from Keith Vaz's steel sword. The sword cuts deep into his chest, and that's enough for the yeti.  Pierre watches helplessly as Spermy Smurf shakes the huge minotaur around by the foot. Keith Vaz sticks his sword into Yer Tie time and time again but never goes for the head. Spermy Smurf leans over and injects venom into the huge yeti just for fun, and then Keith Vaz chops his ribs apart. Pierre dodges away from 2016's maul and attacks the snake Spermy Smurf. A copper pick has no chance to penetrate the boot that the snake is wearing on his tail, but it does get his attention. Spermy Smurf turns and opens his disgusting mouth and then clamps down on Pierres midsection. Iron mail prevents fangs from penetrating, but guts are bruised all the same.  Secretly Spiders has been all but ignored since the opening bite, and the venom appears to have worn off! The minotaur stands up, gets bitten and venom injected but somehow ignores it. Secretly Spiders charges Spermy Smurf and sends the snakeman tumbling to the ground stunned! Spermy Smurf: I wasss attacked. I'm panicking! I'm panicking! What a pussy  Right around that time Yer Tie finally bleeds to death. Secretly Spiders grabs Spermy Smurf and begins punching but all he can do is bruise muscle through the armor.  And then Spermy Smurf bites and injects yet more venom into the huge minotaur. Keith Vaz arrives and removes his head.  In the same instant that Secretly Spiders loses his head it appears that 2016 managed to get past the elf's shield for the second time in the fight. It's a doozy of a blow right in the neck. Nervous tissue is severed, and Pierre is paralyzed completely.  Keith adds another head to his tally. Bad Munki's Team wins with an impressive 3-0 victory. A bruised paw and left hand were the only injuries sustained. Kills: Keith Vaz: 3 Combat Log 
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Jan 9, 2017 17:00
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Hmm, seems suspect. How many times did you have to run that to get those results?
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Jan 9, 2017 17:11
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7. The others were all 3-0 the other way.
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Jan 9, 2017 17:13
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Round 2, Fight 5 Hitmen for Armok (1-0) is on the left side of the arena. CID STEELFORGE (dmboogie) is a male dwarf. He wields an iron spear and wears an iron helm, iron leggings, iron gauntlets, and iron high boots. I Bite You! (Fuubi) is a female serpent man. She is empty handed and wears an iron cap, an iron mail shirt, an iron breast plate, and iron gauntlets. Audrey Gravescreams (Ramc) is a female human. She wields an iron long sword and wears leather armor, leather gauntlets, and leather high boots. Goons of Yore (0-1) is on the right side of the arena. HanzoSteel McSperg the 2nd (moleboy) is a male molemarian. He wields a copper long sword and a wooden shield and wears a copper helm and a copper breast plate. Accrington Stabley (fallingdownjoe) is a male kobold. He wields an iron bow and wears no armor. Sarah of the Silken Beard (Cythereal) is a female dwarf. She wields an iron great axe and wears a copper mail shirt, leather leggings, and leather gauntlets.  Hitmen for Armok is a 1.66 to 1 betting favorite in this match with 3893.00 dwarfbucks in total bets placed on them, compared to 2342.00 dwarfbucks for Goons of Yore.  Well, the overall size isn't far from even.  Forgot we had an archer. Accrington fires and misses wide. The moleman and dwarf charge to intercept the three Hitmen.  The gladiators clash with Audrey Gravescreams stabbing Sarah's foot twice in rapid succession. The dwarven foot goes flying. Sarah, on her way to the floor, sends her great axe in a devastating arc and Audreys left leg flies into the air as well. This is not a good start for Goons of Yore. What else could go wrong?  Oh. The moleman HanzoSteel is immediately paralyzed in the first attack, but he took this long to hit the floor. I Bite You moves to the next target and grabs Sarah's arm to prevent her from swinging that axe again.  CID STEELFORGE slams his spear into Hanzo's head and the moleman is done.  Accrington fires off a second arrow. He misses wide again.  Before the arrow even hits the wall Audrey removes Sarah's hand and then her head.  And now it's 3v1, with one of the three missing a leg and bleeding a lot. The Hitmen barely even slowed in the center during their charge across the arena. Only one of them stopped running and that's only because she lost a leg.  I Bite You finishes the little kobold in style: I Bite You bites Accrington Stabley in the head and the injured part is ripped into loose shreds! Hitmen for Armok live up to the betting hype with a 3-0 victory. Kills: CID STEELFORGE: 1 Audrey Gravescreams: 1 I Bite You: 1 Combat Log 
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Jan 9, 2017 21:09
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Yay fights
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Jan 9, 2017 21:37
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Splode posted:Yay fights
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Jan 9, 2017 21:45
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Spermy Smurf posted:7. I, for one, am glad you persevered to find the right result.
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Jan 9, 2017 21:47
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No 360noscope? Boo! I call a fix!
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Jan 9, 2017 23:02
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Splode posted:Yay fights In my defense the bribes for running fights this round are really poor. Last year I got all sorts of awesome stuff but now its just nothing but unsolicited dick pics. And whoever it is needs to have that bump checked out. Also: the incredble bend is alarming and unsettling.
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Jan 9, 2017 23:33
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Spermy Smurf posted:In my defense the bribes for running fights this round are really poor. Re-healed fracture from a fight with a Troll.
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Jan 9, 2017 23:58
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Spermy Smurf posted:the incredible bend new fighter name for next tourny
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Jan 10, 2017 06:10
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| # ? May 26, 2024 17:17 |
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I, for one, am suspicious of the fact that Spermy is running the fights for the team that accuses him of being a bad commissioner. This seems to be a conflict of interest.
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Jan 10, 2017 13:07
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