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Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
I wish females would kill me

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Second Hand Meat Mouth
Sep 12, 2001

Ein cooler Typ posted:

I wish females would kill me

You want this thread then

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3809803

Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.






"If this rocket test doesn't go well, you are all going to be executed. :lol:"

funkybottoms
Oct 28, 2010

Funky Bottoms is a land man

Auritech posted:

Nah, dystopian sci-fi would be if the lady was a cyber assassin who used her hacking skills to implode his cyber implants to get creds at the identabank

This is just a lovely pulp spy novel

lol if you don't think we're living in a sci-fi dystopia

strange feelings re Daisy
Aug 2, 2000

At last, he has tasted the sting of the Atreides Gom Jabbar.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

strange feelings re Daisy posted:

At last, he has tasted the sting of the Atreides Gom Jabbar.

BeanpolePeckerwood
May 4, 2004

I MAY LOOK LIKE SHIT BUT IM ALSO DUMB AS FUCK



strange feelings re Daisy posted:

At last, he has tasted the sting of the Atreides Gom Jabbar.

:drat:

Gejnor
Mar 14, 2005

Fun Shoe


One of the arrested suspects, is it our spirit animal?

hip check please
Jan 11, 2012

Gejnor posted:



One of the arrested suspects, is it our spirit animal?
That's badass.

KomodoWagon
May 10, 2013

by R. Guyovich
Even their top government agents are malnourished as hell

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

Gejnor posted:



One of the arrested suspects, is it our spirit animal?

Holy poo poo that owns

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

Mods please add "in LOL shirt" to the title.

theperminator
Sep 16, 2009

by Smythe
Fun Shoe

Harveygod posted:

He's a real jerk.

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.
Women in :lol: shirts just assassinated someone with poison needles in an airport at the behest of a supreme dictator that looks like a giant baby and runs a dystopian hellscape of a country......the world really is anime isn't it?

Smash it Smash hit
Dec 30, 2009

prettay, prettay
finding her is going to be like trying to find a needle in kim jong un's brother's sack

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer

Smash it Smash hit
Dec 30, 2009

prettay, prettay

Smash it Smash hit posted:

finding her is going to be like trying to find a needle in kim jong un's brother's sack


a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

maybe she is a professional league of legends player

a shiny rock
Nov 13, 2009

an e-athlete

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
Nam,
Thinking of you,
Lots Of Love,
Un xoxo

Smash it Smash hit
Dec 30, 2009

prettay, prettay
Lucifer our Lord!

Joust
Dec 7, 2007

No Ledges.

HJB posted:

Nam,
Thinking of you,
Lots Of Love,
Un xoxo

They were tattoo needles, woah.

Yolomon Wayne
Jun 10, 2014

You call it "The Big Bang", but what really happened is
Grimey Drawer

Gejnor posted:



One of the arrested suspects, is it our spirit animal?

I cant be the only one seeing "S A" snaking in the shadows beneath the LOL, or was that a joke ive missed?

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

She really is our spirit animal.

Now I'm awaiting the pic of the 2nd girl in a Krusty shirt.

Toadvine
Mar 16, 2009
Please disregard my advice w/r/t history.

Gejnor posted:



One of the arrested suspects, is it our spirit animal?

I just saw this LOL

needle me next NK wifexecutioner

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
Can you imagine feeling a sharp pain and knowing you are most likely about to die and turning around and seeing that shirt swimming in your vision?

Masterful level trolling on Un's part.

Tired Moritz
Mar 25, 2012

wish Lowtax would get tired of YOUR POSTS

(n o i c e)
malaysian airports sounds cursed. first the airplanes and now this??

Toadvine
Mar 16, 2009
Please disregard my advice w/r/t history.

Moridin920 posted:

Can you imagine feeling a sharp pain and knowing you are most likely about to die and turning around and seeing that shirt swimming in your vision?

Masterful level trolling on Un's part.

Literally chuckling at the thought

Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
hi thread!

looks like LOL girl actually killed Kim Jong Nam not with a poison needle or gas, but with our favorite nerve agent, VX! (the X stands for eXceptional!)

http://edition.cnn.com/2017/02/23/asia/kim-jong-nam-vx-nerve-agent/index.html

quote:

(CNN) The chemical substance used to kill Kim Jong Nam was VX nerve agent, according to a preliminary report by the Chemistry Department of Malaysia, Malaysian police said in a statement Friday. Kim, the half-brother of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un, died February 13.

GuitarJunkie
Sep 8, 2004

"Boy, have we got a vacation for you."
They found the toxin on his face, maybe they sprayed him or found a way to smear it on by touch? Pretty sneaky and definitely a planned hit.

EAB
Jan 18, 2011
Apparently the chicks who killed him weren't assassins, they were tricked into thinking they were on a game show.... shits hosed up! Explains the LOL shirt.

other people
Jun 27, 2004
Associate Christ
you should never have to explain a lol shirt :colbert:

Drunk & Ugly
Feb 10, 2003

GIMME GIMME GIMME, DON'T ASK WHAT FOR
serious question, if they just did it naively how did they not get it on themselves? it sounds brutal

quote:

VX works by inhibiting the operation of an enzyme that helps the body's nervous system function, according to the Organization for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons.
It's more dangerous when exposed to skin in comparison to Sarin, another nerve agent. Nerve agents on the whole work faster when they are absorbed through the respiratory system.
Symptoms can appear after a few seconds, and even small doses can affect people. Larger exposure can lead to convulsions, paralysis and deadly respiratory failure.

Lupin
Feb 21, 2007

GuitarJunkie posted:

Pretty sneaky and definitely a planned hit.

I dunno man, maybe this was all just an accident :confused:

legion989
Jan 18, 2013

quote:

VX works by inhibiting the operation of an enzyme that helps the body's nervous system function, according to the Organization for the Prohibition of Chemical Weapons.
It's more dangerous when exposed to skin in comparison to Sarin, another nerve agent. Nerve agents on the whole work faster when they are absorbed through the respiratory system.
Symptoms can appear after a few seconds, and even small doses can affect people. Larger exposure can lead to convulsions, paralysis and deadly respiratory failure.

So "The Rock" with Sean Connery was a documentary then?

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

EAB posted:

Apparently the chicks who killed him weren't assassins, they were tricked into thinking they were on a game show.... shits hosed up! Explains the LOL shirt.

if you watch the video, their body language doesn't support that at all. They look like they know they're killing someone and walking away without drawing attention, not at all like they believe they're on a game show.

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

quote:

Malaysia has not blamed the North Korean state for the death, but says North Koreans were clearly behind it.

the black husserl
Feb 25, 2005

Zorodius posted:

if you watch the video, their body language doesn't support that at all. They look like they know they're killing someone and walking away without drawing attention, not at all like they believe they're on a game show.

For one of them at least (not Ms. LOL), that was all part of the show. She believed she was being paid to pull "pranks" for some some sort of Youtube prank thing. The prank involved walking up to a victim and spraying them in the face with a water gun, then walking away.

quote:

Indonesia’s national police chief, Tito Karnavian, told reporters in Indonesia’s Aceh province that the Indonesian woman, 25-year-old Siti Aisyah, was paid to be involved in pranks .

He said she and another woman performed stunts which involved convincing men to close their eyes and then spraying them with water.

Her body language is casual because she's done it a few times, she "knows" she's not spraying anything but water, and because she's being paid to act that way. Plus she was a poor Indonesian mother so odds of her being an assassin are highly doubtful. The LOL lady on the other hand....kinda sketchy behavior, although way too sloppy to be some kind of pro assassin. She was caught very easily.

quote:

The second female suspect, who was captured on CCTV at the airport in a top emblazoned with “LOL” and arrested on Wednesday in possession of a Vietnamese passport, stayed at a hotel near the airport in the days before the attack, booking the cheapest room and carrying a wad of cash, according to a receptionist who spoke to Reuters.

She moved accommodation twice. Employees at the second hotel said she borrowed a pair of scissors from the front desk the evening before the attack, and that a member of housekeeping staff found hair on the floor and in the bin the next day.

Ein cooler Typ
Nov 26, 2013

by FactsAreUseless

they're blaming people from North Korea, not saying the government did it

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Auritech
May 27, 2004

Blessed be the tailors
The masks are cut to fit

Blessed be the woodworkers
The crosses and the gallows

Blessed be the forgers of iron
And the spikes and the barbwire

Blessed be the stone cutters
It took a quarry to bury the dreams
There were some protesters in front of the North Korean embassy yesterday with signs like "Respect Malaysia," "PSY Yes SPY No," and my favorite, "Hey Jong Un Dennis Rodman is Disappointed"

Malaysia was like one of the only friends the DPRK had and they just hosed that in the butt lol

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