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I saw this recently and couldn't be sure if it was a parody. Aside from making Agile look like a sloppy joke, it's seriously one of the worst, most unhelpful diagrams ever made. It conveys zero amount of meaning because it's such a messy piece of garbage.
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Feb 26, 2017 01:38
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ScrumPLOP
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Feb 26, 2017 01:51
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coffeecup posted:I saw this recently and couldn't be sure if it was a parody. Aside from making Agile look like a sloppy joke, it's seriously one of the worst, most unhelpful diagrams ever made. It conveys zero amount of meaning because it's such a messy piece of garbage. deloitte exists to make things confusing so they can bill out their people to explain it to you
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Feb 26, 2017 01:55
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Iridium posted:also im squadification
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Feb 26, 2017 01:58
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coffeecup posted:I saw this recently and couldn't be sure if it was a parody. Aside from making Agile look like a sloppy joke, it's seriously one of the worst, most unhelpful diagrams ever made. It conveys zero amount of meaning because it's such a messy piece of garbage. it's legit. both come courtesy of a friend that works at Deloitte (doing non-IT consulting poo poo)
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Feb 26, 2017 02:00
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I had a friend just recently contact me cuz apparently deloitte had a budget issue laid off a bunch of contractors locally, so friend-of-friend was looking for work. i'd never heard of them until yesterday.
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Feb 26, 2017 02:14
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Fanged Lawn Wormy posted:I had a friend just recently contact me cuz apparently deloitte had a budget issue laid off a bunch of contractors locally, so friend-of-friend was looking for work. i'd never heard of them until yesterday. really? they're one of the big four, you must be blessed to work in an industry that is completely isolated from anything even vaguely enterprisey
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Feb 26, 2017 02:17
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i use accenture to talk to deloitte
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Feb 26, 2017 04:08
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its me, I'm the guy who's happy to have his name plastered at the top of this
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Feb 26, 2017 04:18
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Mad Wack posted:i use accenture to talk to deloitte how many levels of consulting are you on right now
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Feb 26, 2017 04:27
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uncurable mlady posted:really? they're one of the big four, you must be blessed to work in an industry that is completely isolated from anything even vaguely enterprisey them, emc, ibm, and accenture? i feel like ibm isnt one of them but im blanking
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Feb 26, 2017 05:03
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uncurable mlady posted:how many levels of consulting are you on right now lmao I would really like a high enough res version of that absurd agile (v3) masterpiece to print out and plaster across a wall
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Feb 26, 2017 05:09
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its like the buzzword version of the biochemical pathways chart (warning, huge)
Buff Skeleton fucked around with this message at 05:22 on Feb 26, 2017 |
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Feb 26, 2017 05:20
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Buff Skeleton posted:(warning, huge)[/url] me to your mom lol oddly all my webex stuff was good this week, but i did watch someone webex a screenshare to a cisco unit and it worked okay
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Feb 26, 2017 05:28
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lmfao just noticed eXtreme Programming (XP)
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Feb 26, 2017 05:29
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Agile Vector posted:them, emc, ibm, and accenture? kpmg deloitte ey pwc
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Feb 26, 2017 06:12
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uncurable mlady posted:kpmg deloitte ey pwc
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Feb 26, 2017 06:35
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cjs: daydreaming about a fantasy novel series that involves a quest for the scrum crystal
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Feb 26, 2017 08:36
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Buff Skeleton posted:its like the buzzword version of the biochemical pathways chart (warning, huge) e: found the source image http://biochemical-pathways.com/#/map/1
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Feb 26, 2017 10:15
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I'm the walking skeleton
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Feb 26, 2017 12:39
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Corla Plankun posted:cjs: daydreaming about a fantasy novel series that involves a quest for the scrum crystal You may enjoy the business fantasy works of Donald L. Brampthorne.
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Feb 26, 2017 14:05
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I assumed that was a parody of the London tube map.... do they actually use that to sell poo poo?
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Feb 26, 2017 15:07
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A Pinball Wizard posted:I assumed that was a parody of the London tube map.... do they actually use that to sell poo poo? yeah. Deloitte, PWC, Ernst and Young, all that sort of management consulting poo poo has a business model predicated on selling services to confused and directionless executive management teams unable or unwilling to listen to their own in-house expertise. adding to that confusion means more business. the more they can boost the view that IT, or financials, or what the hell ever is a massive dangerous labyrinth of terror, the more consulting hours they can bill.
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Feb 26, 2017 15:18
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Doom Mathematic posted:You may enjoy the business fantasy works of Donald L. Brampthorne. based on the description, I was expecting a link to the Phoenix project, but this is good too
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Feb 26, 2017 15:24
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im the watermark
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Feb 26, 2017 18:59
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lmao someone spent time making that diagram
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Feb 26, 2017 19:23
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a work of art created by someone who knows how dumb and wasteful programming really is and is out to fleece others who haven't realized it yet
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Feb 26, 2017 20:31
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every profession is a conspiracy against the laity
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Feb 27, 2017 02:20
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speaking of consultant shitlords haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahaha
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Feb 27, 2017 13:40
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i work for deloitte
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Feb 27, 2017 13:45
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Maximum Leader posted:i work for deloitte do you have a favorite wall to go up against?
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Feb 27, 2017 14:25
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nah just kidding we cool thinking of getting into consulting myself, big data is really just look at the whole data set and apply common sense wrapped in a poo poo ton of bullshit isnt it?
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Feb 27, 2017 14:26
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lol if you don't work for a company you hate, like a good little german
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Feb 27, 2017 14:31
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FrozenVent posted:do you have a favorite wall to go up against? third floor gents toilets, fourth stall
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Feb 27, 2017 16:03
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DOWN JACKET FETISH posted:third floor gents toilets, fourth stall  died how he lived quietly sobbing in the office bathroom
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Feb 27, 2017 18:23
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Cold on a Cob posted:
while five guys unloaded on him
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Feb 27, 2017 18:25
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FrozenVent posted:while five guys unloaded on him 
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Feb 27, 2017 18:37
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troughman returns
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Feb 27, 2017 19:32
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new JR tokyo map lookin' kinda messy tbh
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Feb 27, 2017 20:00
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FrozenVent posted:nah just kidding we cool no there's specific tools for working with the enormous data sets. it's not that hard though- just more stuff to learn
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