TRUMP116: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUz9xCTOPRw

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > TRUMP116: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUz9xCTOPRw

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Agrajag: Jan 21, 2006; gat dang thats hot

Al-Saqr posted:

hey guys PSA here if you have any racist friends and family please show them this:-

https://twitter.com/ajplus/status/838411284089450496

pretty sure muslims and brown people in general already know this.

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:52

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# ? May 31, 2024 14:26

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

SKULL.GIF posted:

pizza opinion: supreme or nothing

*flips out switchblade and assumes fighting posture*

"I think you meant to say meat lovers, friend"

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:53

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

You can pretty much tell from a Mar-A-Lago hugbox trips that he's a big fat mess right now.

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:53

crazy cloud: Nov 7, 2012; by Cyrano4747; Lipstick Apathy

pineapple on pizza is really good but it's like only a once in a while thing your opportunity cost for good toppings like mushrooms and peppers and onions that don't mesh well with the 'napple is significant.

Opportunity cost for toppings, topportunity cost? (((Topportunity cost)))?

this is a post legitimately about food and not sex crime. Sex crimes are bad and not cool and you should try not to do any of them, IMHO

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:53

tacodaemon: Nov 27, 2006

https://twitter.com/Fahrenthold/status/838583045657616384

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:53

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

I tell my parents

I work on a university campus lol, the odds of a white guy with a MAGA hat killing me in a shooting or bombing are 1000000x higher than my chances of dying to a Muslim terrorist, even though we have like 80% of the Muslims in the state here or smtg. Why the hell should I worry about jihadists when not 5 miles away there's yeehawdists burning crosses

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:54

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

Mariana Horchata posted:

*Schumerishly lowers glasses and sends staffer out for a case of Brooklyn Lager*

Someone pls make a schumer deal with it gif where the sunglasses drop to his eyes then go all the way down his nose

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:55

nopants: May 29, 2004

Pop-o-Matic Trouble posted:

any good depp state movies worth watching tonight goons?

The ninth gate

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:55

Agrajag: Jan 21, 2006; gat dang thats hot

tacodaemon posted:

https://twitter.com/Fahrenthold/status/838583045657616384

like i give a gently caress

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:56

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Trump is, at heart, a slumlord. Probably he's putting extra pressure on his older clients who only paid the old rate to leave so he can sell more memberships at the new rate

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:57

kopasetic: Sep 18, 2009

http://www.politico.com/story/2017/03/trump-reince-priebus-white-house-235703

Everyone hates Reince and he is an anal retentive micromanager. Who knew.

Politico posted:

Others complain about Priebus�s West Wing management, which they argue has become suffocating. They point to his habit of sprinting into meetings � �He literally runs�

The idea of Priebus sprinting around the White House is hilarious.

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:57

Lastgirl: Sep 7, 1997; Good Morning!
Sunday Morning!

Vertical Lime posted:

took only 6 weeks

https://twitter.com/politicoalex/status/838580352054673413

reince's been on the chopping block for a while, they're just too much of a spineless quisling to kick this magnanimous turbo shistain to the curb for good cos theyve got it made

lol if u cant tell someone whos name is reince prebius to gently caress off automatically if he dare encroaches your periphery and irritates you with the burden of reminding that he exists, out of sight out of mind

bunch of dweebs who can deport immigrants and bash lgbt people because they dont have to see them personally but when it comes to meetings and actual physical confrontation they dont have the guts to say it right into each others face, miller, bannon and co are all just fucken nerds who hide behind their lovely writings

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:57

Dapper_Swindler: Feb 14, 2012; Im glad my instant dislike in you has been validated again and again.

Augus posted:

Imagine the sad fuckers who still look up to this flabby old blob-baby as a symbol of masculinity

thats what i find amusing and kinda enraging about the Ben Garrison cartoons. like do these people actually see this smooth brained fat poo poo heap narcissist as some loving super god man.

SKULL.GIF posted:

do you genuinely and honestly think trump doesn't experience severe distress from not being the single most attention-grabbing thing in the world?

like not even 48 hours ago the man sprayed piss all over twitter while denouncing Obama for secretly wiretapping him

after his big Presidential moment was promptly ignored while everyone focused on jefferson beauregard sessions iii for three days

if people arnt sucking his dick 24/7 and talking about "what a wonderfull thing trump did, a real fine thing" he is distressed.

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:58

Solarin: Nov 15, 2007

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

I'm down for this poo poo 100%

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:58

Knight: Dec 23, 2000; SPACE-A-HOLIC; Taco Defender

I think the best part of these Obama wiretapping allegations and FBI/DoJ shenanigans happening over the weekend is that Republicans I know really don't know how to respond to it until they get a clear message from RWM. They're straining to believe Trump heard something so I hear variations of "hosed up, if true" but afraid to take a stance without some signaling from sources they trust. This will probably be cleared up tomorrow but lol with that incoming travel EO it's going to be a clusterfuck

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:58

Stinky Wizzleteats: Nov 26, 2015; You must pay the price for this post.

Epic High Five posted:

Why the hell should I worry about jihadists when not 5 miles away there's yeehawdists burning crosses

new eminem raps lookin dope

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:59

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Epic High Five posted:

I tell my parents

I work on a university campus lol, the odds of a white guy with a MAGA hat killing me in a shooting or bombing are 1000000x higher than my chances of dying to a Muslim terrorist, even though we have like 80% of the Muslims in the state here or smtg. Why the hell should I worry about jihadists when not 5 miles away there's yeehawdists burning crosses

would rather be around immigrants than a bunch of MAGA Infowar watching loons

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:59

MadJackal: Apr 30, 2004

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJeugIJFXas

# ? Mar 6, 2017 03:59

old.flv: Jan 28, 2017; A good lad who likes his Anna's.

Lastgirl posted:

a spineless quisling

whoa chill

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

Solarin: Nov 15, 2007

Epic High Five posted:

yeehawdists

lol that is great

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

etalian posted:

would rather be around immigrants than a bunch of MAGA Infowar watching loons

ohhhhh yeah, a million times this

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi: Mar 26, 2005

Reince sucks and I'm glad his life is miserable right now

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

Kilmers Elbow: Jun 15, 2012

POOTUS

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

anime was right: Jun 27, 2008; death is certain
keep yr cool

i have moved onto vodka

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:00

paranoid randroid: Mar 4, 2007

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

drat this guys reality is much more interesting than mine, where we just got a dumb rear end in a top hat moron president that tapes his ties together

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:01

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Cpt. Mahatma Gandhi posted:

Reince sucks and I'm glad his life is miserable right now

Another pathetic Trump bootlicker

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:01

paranoid randroid: Mar 4, 2007

MadJackal posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJeugIJFXas

theres a reason they call Lake Oswego "Lake NoNegro"

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:01

the bitcoin of weed: Nov 1, 2014

Epic High Five posted:

gently caress that meme, pineapple is delicious on pizza and food snobs are even worse than wine snobs

i used to like pineapple on pizza but then something in my brain changed and now i can't stand the taste of pineapple in anything. ruined pi�a coladas too. who the gently caress knows

anyway i'd rather just have olives + mushrooms, the best choice pizza topping

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:01

Business Gorillas: Mar 11, 2009

logikv9 posted:

i'd fight a gorilla for $2000

pm me

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:02

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Fullhouse posted:

i used to like pineapple on pizza but then something in my brain changed and now i can't stand the taste of pineapple in anything. ruined pi�a coladas too. who the gently caress knows

anyway i'd rather just have olives + mushrooms, the best choice pizza topping

in ur case tho you don't hate pineapple on pizza, you just hate pineapple generally

a league apart from what these insufferable foodies yammer on about

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:02

Trumps Baby Hands: Mar 27, 2016; Silent white light filled the world. And the righteous and unrighteous alike were consumed in that holy fire.

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

All things considered, this is actually the best case scenario for how things play out

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:02

theflyingexecutive: Apr 22, 2007

Solarin posted:

nothing will take DJT down faster than an incest/pedo video leaking. That's gotta be what the real dangerous kompromat on him is, piss tape is an appetizer

It is most certainly part of the piss tape

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:03

punchymcpunch: Oct 14, 2012

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

I like your friend.

re pineapple, its the king of fruits and if it wants to be on a pizza then thats its divine right

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:03

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

I hope he's right lol, that sounds way better than what we've got looming

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

Mariana Horchata: Jun 30, 2008; College Slice

anime was right posted:

i have moved onto vodka

Bon voyage.

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

etalian: Mar 20, 2006

Trumps Baby Hands posted:

All things considered, this is actually the best case scenario for how things play out

Alternatively

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5yVklzL0vI

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

mods change everybody else's name to yeehawdists tia

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

quadrophrenic: Feb 4, 2011; WIN MARNIE WIN

MadJackal posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJeugIJFXas

this is simultaneously hilarious and terrifying

just like everything else

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

Epic High Five: Jun 5, 2004

Avocado is the King of Fruits and it's the mad king that the sex-obsessed botanical world deserves

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:04

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# ? May 31, 2024 14:26

Homeless Friend: Jul 16, 2007

HailedUser posted:

Talked to my schizophrenic conspiracy theorist friend today (well, not actually schizophrenic, he's schizotypal bipolar and fairly lucid right now) who explained his theory on everything going on right now. I will now share it with you:

1. Everything happening right now has been in the works since 1963 when LBJ, Bush Sr. and Ted Cruz's Dad teamed up with the Mafia to kill Kennedy as part of a long con to usher in a New World Order. Kennedy was actually in on the assassination too as he had a fatal brain tumor and six months to live. I'll skip the intricacies in part because they aren't fully necessary to the story and in part because they're mostly pretty boring. The point is that according to him, this stage (Stage 1) of the plan culminated with 9/11 under Bush II, which of course was an inside job intended to allow for the creation of the total surveillance state necessary for Stage 2.

2. Stage 2 as he called it, involved framing the Russians for planting a Manchurian Candidate in the White House following Barrack Obama's Presidency (who, naturally, was groomed for his Presidency by the Bushes and the Clintons). Thus, "the Deep State" threw the election and planted evidence that the Russians had hacked the RNC and DNC when in fact it was Edward Snowden, who is working as a deep cover agent behind enemy lines in Russia.

3. Once Trump was in office, they'd slowly release "evidence" of collusion culminating in the removal of the Trump Administration and the release of all the blackmail that they've been using to keep the Republicans in line. Apparently, at this point, nearly every GOP politician in DC will be implicated in "treason," allowing Comey to arrest them, aside from Trump and Pence, who will be quickly impeached by the Democrats, making room for the newly elected Speaker of the House Hillary Clinton to become President.

4. At this point, with a reasonable casus belli, the United States will drag NATO into a war with Russia which will be won within a year. During the Peace Resolutions, NATO will unify into a World Government similar in model to the EU, though with the United States and the UK (along with the rest of the Anglosphere + Japan) at the head.

5. My friend quote "isn't sure on what Stage 3 is," but thinks it involves a Seed AI that Google is running and the colonization of other star systems.

lol you're friend is fuckin crazy, and not because they're schizo, but because they think our politicians are this competent

# ? Mar 6, 2017 04:05

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > TRUMP116: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vUz9xCTOPRw

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