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A moron posted:I thought it would be a genius idea to 'boost the productivity' of my coworkers by spiking a flask of coffee with store bought caffeine pills. Unless he put in literally a hundred pills there's no way this killed the baby. And weed is something that people smoke when they want to have fun and chill, not an emotional painkiller like booze that sad sacks use to feel numb. Trust me I know both ways. Another moron posted:He has a sister who got pregnant out of wedlock. They effectively shipped her off to Hawaii so nobody would know she was pregnant, and now she's "Cut off" from the family for violating the sanctity of marriage. What the gently caress, someone tell these people it's not 1953 anymore.
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Mar 8, 2017 17:42
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Gynovore posted:Unless he put in literally a hundred pills there's no way this killed the baby. Seriously? have you ever had caffeine in the dosages they sell at gas stations, smoke shops, etc.? That poo poo fucks you up worse than even smoking or shooting up cocaine. The only thing I can compare it to is amphetamine. I can totally see it causing a miscarriage. Caffeine is no joke; it's just usually found in such small dosages like coffee and soda.
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Mar 8, 2017 19:33
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Pearnicious posted:What the hell do you think a Fry Daddy is? MacheteZombie posted:bougie scum
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Mar 8, 2017 19:39
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Plenty O Lentils! posted:Seriously? have you ever had caffeine in the dosages they sell at gas stations, smoke shops, etc.? That poo poo fucks you up worse than even smoking or shooting up cocaine. The only thing I can compare it to is amphetamine. I can totally see it causing a miscarriage. Caffeine is no joke; it's just usually found in such small dosages like coffee and soda. Do you weigh under 75lbs? Like I understand how it could be bad for pregnant mom but I doubt she chugged the whole thing.
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Mar 8, 2017 20:30
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Gynovore posted:Unless he put in literally a hundred pills there's no way this killed the baby. And weed is something that people smoke when they want to have fun and chill, not an emotional painkiller like booze that sad sacks use to feel numb. Trust me I know both ways. Both drugs work fine for both things
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Mar 8, 2017 20:34
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Plenty O Lentils! posted:Seriously? have you ever had caffeine in the dosages they sell at gas stations, smoke shops, etc.? That poo poo fucks you up worse than even smoking or shooting up cocaine. The only thing I can compare it to is amphetamine. I can totally see it causing a miscarriage. Caffeine is no joke; it's just usually found in such small dosages like coffee and soda. Caffeine in soda is 30-50mg A no-doz pill is 200mg A 12 oz Coffee is also 200mg Pregnant women can consume that much a day. Caffeine is pretty much joke but you'll tweak a little if you have no tolerance, consume a large dose on an empty stomach and weigh like nothing. Maybe if you are that unhealthy a large dose of caffeine would tip you over to miscarriage, but this is an office setting where people drink coffee by the liter so there is no way the caffeine caused it.
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Mar 8, 2017 20:37
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I knew someone who's brother was once given a Fry Daddy and two Fry Baby's for christmas one year when he was like ~17. This was the turning point in his life where he decided to work out and stop being a fat slob and now he's in super good shape and is successful.
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Mar 8, 2017 20:53
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quote:In college I had a lot of brain problems, depression and some bipolar issues mostly, and was an incel. I started getting this huge chip on my shoulder, never jerked off because I had body image problems, and was terrified of talking to girls. Skipped an "I'm a Republican, DWI  has to be anonymous because I feel victimized  " confession because those bore mequote:hey chicken fuckers,
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Mar 8, 2017 21:12
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Pornstar dating goon, who cares? Is she ashamed of it or are you?
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Mar 8, 2017 21:18
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do you ever get tempted to look up her videos and see her get railed by other dudes?
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Mar 8, 2017 21:24
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Name the pornstar dbag
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Mar 8, 2017 21:31
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Pretty much retired? 
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Mar 8, 2017 21:39
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Meridian posted:Pretty much retired? That's code for still doing escort work.
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Mar 8, 2017 23:06
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I think porn star guy and I live in very different worlds if he thinks that is something to boast about.
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Mar 8, 2017 23:12
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I think darkpriest's gf is August Ames, but he actually works in the industry. Also yeah goon's pornstar gf is definitely still an escort/stripper/"model".
School Nickname fucked around with this message at 23:22 on Mar 8, 2017 |
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Mar 8, 2017 23:18
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Can't believe yall are slut shaming porn stars, and on international women's day at that. For shame.
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Mar 8, 2017 23:21
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What is iafd
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Mar 8, 2017 23:28
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Meridian posted:Pretty much retired? She still fucks other people, now she just does it for free. He's getting cucked is the joke, you see.
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Mar 8, 2017 23:49
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KomodoWagon posted:What is iafd It's like WASD for these guys: 
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Mar 8, 2017 23:56
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LingcodKilla posted:That's code for still doing escort work. I know. If the dude's into that, good for him I guess.
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Mar 9, 2017 00:03
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Some people really like the idea of other dudes banging their chicks because they get off on the idea that their little cumslut still comes home to daddy at the end of the night. His goddess comes home after a day of taking loads at the local Motel and he has her dinner prepped and bath ran. He ends the night with, "Honey, can I have my creampie tonight for dessert?"
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Mar 9, 2017 00:14
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Solice Kirsk posted:It's like WASD for these guys: lolling at this
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Mar 9, 2017 00:28
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Bus groper goon is the only legit sounding 'fesh in the last 15 pages.
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Mar 9, 2017 00:46
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Dogbrisket posted:Bus groper goon is the only legit sounding 'fesh in the last 15 pages. wait so you don't think Donald Trump is an alien
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Mar 9, 2017 01:42
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Solice Kirsk posted:It's like WASD for these guys: Imaging all the gropin' you could do with these babies
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Mar 9, 2017 01:47
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Police Automaton posted:Imaging all the gropin' you could do with these babies Ichabod no!
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Mar 9, 2017 01:52
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Shampy posted:Some people really like the idea of other dudes banging their chicks because they get off on the idea that their little cumslut still comes home to daddy at the end of the night. His goddess comes home after a day of taking loads at the local Motel and he has her dinner prepped and bath ran. He ends the night with, "Honey, can I have my creampie tonight for dessert?" Gross dude
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Mar 9, 2017 02:27
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Solice Kirsk posted:It's like WASD for these guys: hoy beltalowda.
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Mar 9, 2017 03:26
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quote:My family got together over the weekend for a "special occasion dinner" my brother requested. For the record he is 35 years old and still lives with my parents, never had a relationship or as far as I know been on a date in his life. Anyway I arrive and he's clearly very nervous about something and the atmosphere is pretty uncomfortable but it was more or less going fine until half way through the dinner where he stood up and announced that he is coming out as asexual. After he finishes his little speech about what it means and all that he starts crying and locks himself in his room. these people do exist quote:I have to preface this by saying that I do not drink and drive unless it's absolutely unavoidable. I work in a downtown area and live about an hour away, and there's no bus service out there. I could Uber but it's nearly 40 dollars each way, and I'm not going to pay that insane fee just because I had a few beers. I find this less believable than the first one Like, try to keep your "narrator is an idiot" red flags down to one per fesh, not multiple per paragraph
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Mar 9, 2017 03:46
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loquacius posted:"special occasion dinner" Dad is the true hero here "Yeah okay we already knew you weren't getting your dick wet, what's the big deal"
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Mar 9, 2017 04:07
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GOTTA STAY FAI posted:"Yeah okay we already knew you weren't getting your dick wet, what's the big deal" I like the concept of just dumping on all the ridiculous people in your life in a fesh. That's probably easier for most people than telling the truth about themselves
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Mar 9, 2017 04:12
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I'm sure drunk driving goon who never drives drunk who then describes the many many times that he does will win his case with the innovative defense of "i didn't do it". I hope he does fight it though so they are more inclined to throw the book at him and give him the maximum sentence instead of the standard slap on the wrist fine etc for first timers.
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Mar 9, 2017 06:38
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Hahaha so he called a dinner to announce that he's not getting any nookie, but now, there's a word for it!! Uh yeah, it's rear end Burgers.
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Mar 9, 2017 06:54
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No your honour, you see I failed the sobriety test because I was so scared. And then the police falsified the breathalyzer results. It had nothing to do with all the beer I drank at happy hour, its the polices fault  Also loving lol at "I never drive drunk, I occasionally have five or six beers before driving myself home but I also eat so it's fine"
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Mar 9, 2017 13:52
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Danaru posted:Also loving lol at "I never drive drunk, I occasionally have five or six beers before driving myself home but I also eat so it's fine" That part stuck out too at first, but after thinking about it there are a surprising amount of people who still believe the "bread soaking up the alcohol" myth. Also I don't care how clumsy or nervous you are, if you are a relatively young adult with no disabilities, you aren't going to literally fall over walking in a straight line...unless you're drunk, or if the made up racist cops trip you. I think the "your equipment was faulty/uncalibrated" argument may have been more likely to work in the past, but considering how many thousands of people have been trying that defense since that advice started circulating (although I mostly heard the advice for fighting speeding tickets), I'm pretty sure most departments have long since updated their procedures to make sure everything is done by the book with recently calibrated equipment.
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Mar 9, 2017 14:26
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Danaru posted:No your honour, you see I failed the sobriety test because I was so scared. And then the police falsified the breathalyzer results. It had nothing to do with all the beer I drank at happy hour, its the polices fault Drunk driving is fine! I haven't killed anyone yet! (That's when I'll know it's a problem but not before). Hopefully the only person you kill is you. Doesn't seem like it would be a great loss.
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Mar 9, 2017 14:30
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I can't believe you idiots are taking the bait on this fake as hell drunk driving story. It's an exercise in being an unreliable narrator, where he denies something but then it becomes clear that it's true. Except he goes way overboard with it to the point of absurdity.
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Mar 9, 2017 15:35
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The Management posted:I can't believe you idiots are taking the bait on this fake as hell drunk driving story. It's an exercise in being an unreliable narrator, where he denies something but then it becomes clear that it's true. Except he goes way overboard with it to the point of absurdity. As loq has said many times in the past, it's a lot more fun if you assume all of them are real. If the thread was just people screaming FAKE over and over again it would be a pretty lovely thread. If you think one is fake, just keep it to yourself and wait for the next one. Then again maybe we need the cries of "fake" every now and then so that we don't get posts like yours all the time either
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Mar 9, 2017 15:43
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Solice Kirsk posted:It's like WASD for these guys: Marfan?
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Mar 9, 2017 15:45
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The Management posted:I can't believe you idiots are taking the bait on this fake as hell drunk driving story. It's an exercise in being an unreliable narrator, where he denies something but then it becomes clear that it's true. Except he goes way overboard with it to the point of absurdity. I think in many/most of these things the base premise of the story (in this case, being someone who drives drunk) is probably real but they add spicy bits because they feel like they need to make it entertaining. If we called out every "bait" confession we'd have to do it for pretty much every single one. People hardly ever seem to write in looking for actual advice, it's almost all people trying to get a rise out of us with the remainder being drunk sadbrains dumping their feels on us. Besides, there definitely are people who do believe driving after drinking when they "feel fine" counts as a crime. "I drive better when I'm drunk" is a common saying for a reason, there are a lot of people who truly believe that so aside from the rich whitey hating cops and the being set up thing that confession isn't wildly out of the scope of reality like the alien/ghost ones are.
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Mar 9, 2017 15:55
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