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Went back in time and ate my own rear end in a top hat
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Mar 15, 2017 09:42
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HAT FETISH posted:Went back in time and ate my own rear end in a top hat
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Mar 15, 2017 09:52
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:Just ask her out, you dumbass. this. But I know you'll still go with loving raviolis + convoluted explanation of who inherited what
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Mar 15, 2017 09:59
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Jim Barris posted:Did you show up at your high school graduation to eat your own rear end in a top hat? Or your wedding? I'm just trying to imagine a situation where eating out your own, younger self, rear end in a top hat is for attention and not your own personal sexual gratification.
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Mar 15, 2017 10:17
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i developed an addiction to alcohol that was slowly dismantling my life and robbing me of anything that made it worth living early on its deffo good for impressing chicks because everyone under 25 is an idiot but then later on i was 27 and drinking vodka in bed and everyone was p much done thinking i was cool
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Mar 15, 2017 10:50
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Act gay in the nighttime
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Mar 15, 2017 11:13
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I love how many bitches in this thread are so terrified of interacting with a real girl they are freaking out over a meaningless flirty gesture. Sometimes I talk to girls (being fully aware) they may not be interested!!!!!! FUCKIN' MIND BLOWN!!!!!
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Mar 15, 2017 11:28
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We were playing some world domination/trade simulator game in highschool. My country was in the lead by a lot and I would have easily won. Instead I gave the girl I liked all my money and oil and nukes if she would let me survive at the end. After my armies were spread out far enough fighting other people and tge game was almost over she nuked all my cities and ended up being the sole surviving country. She called me an idiot afterward and we never went out. e: to clarify this was an actual assignment that took place over a month or so. I got a B for poor resource management. yeah I eat ass fucked around with this message at 11:34 on Mar 15, 2017 |
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Mar 15, 2017 11:30
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I hit a dude with a baseball bat once
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Mar 15, 2017 11:38
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I didn't do it for attention though I hated that fucker
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Mar 15, 2017 11:38
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Should've went with a shovel imo
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Mar 15, 2017 12:19
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Space Race Riot posted:Should've went with a shovel imo *gone why does everyone have such a hard time using past participles nowadays?
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Mar 15, 2017 12:26
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yeah I eat rear end posted:We were playing some world domination/trade simulator game in highschool. My country was in the lead by a lot and I would have easily won. Instead I gave the girl I liked all my money and oil and nukes if she would let me survive at the end. "Alright class, here's your assignment: play civ 3 for a month."
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Mar 15, 2017 12:29
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Mar 15, 2017 12:34
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shut up blegum posted:"Alright class, here's your assignment: play civ 3 for a month." He was the football coach teaching an AP history class. That was far from the dumbest assignment we got from him.
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Mar 15, 2017 12:37
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good thing the snow softened his fall
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Mar 15, 2017 12:40
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Called horses gay
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Mar 15, 2017 12:41
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Ein cooler Typ posted:good thing the snow softened his fall Yup just like the desert sand softens Wile E. Coyote's falls
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Mar 15, 2017 12:41
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Did this person die? 
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Mar 15, 2017 13:04
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Professor Shark posted:Did this person die? no, but like wile e. coyote he had to be peeled off the ground with a spatula
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Mar 15, 2017 13:05
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yeah I eat rear end posted:We were playing some world domination/trade simulator game in highschool. My country was in the lead by a lot and I would have easily won. Instead I gave the girl I liked all my money and oil and nukes if she would let me survive at the end. This owns
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Mar 15, 2017 13:07
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I died once
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Mar 15, 2017 13:51
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yeah I eat rear end posted:We were playing some world domination/trade simulator game in highschool. My country was in the lead by a lot and I would have easily won. Instead I gave the girl I liked all my money and oil and nukes if she would let me survive at the end. who says school doesn't teach life skills
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Mar 15, 2017 15:01
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yeah I eat rear end posted:He was the football coach teaching an AP history class. That was far from the dumbest assignment we got from him. ap classes are such bullshit. nothing on a high school campus should yield any college credit
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Mar 15, 2017 15:22
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Never had to try op. 
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Mar 15, 2017 15:24
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OMGVBFLOL posted:ap classes are such bullshit. nothing on a high school campus should yield any college credit I agree in hindsight but at the time I wasn't about to turn down 30 free credits right out of the gate.
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Mar 15, 2017 15:43
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when i was a little kid my mom took me to the bank and i tried to get a middle aged woman to notice me by doing the jacobs ladder string figure really fast with the string loop i kept with me
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Mar 15, 2017 15:50
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You complete fool don't give her loving ravioli cans completely out of the blue. It's a good idea but my christ just ask her out and if she says yes use the ravioli move like 2 months in. It'll land at that point
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Mar 15, 2017 17:01
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Ya deffinitely save the ravioli. And don't get any funny ideas about printers either
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Mar 15, 2017 17:09
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Psycho Society posted:Ya deffinitely save the ravioli. And don't get any funny ideas about printers either Trust me I already went over this but I cannot find a PDF of the original Garfield Ravioli's label anywhere! At this point i'm honestly more excited about the test can I get to eat when they arrive to make sure they aren't rancid cans of mold and rotting beef, because they are definitely super delicious. All the amazon customer reviews are like "I just bought a gross of these and hide them in the basement under some blankets from my kids who can subsist on trash-tier beefaroni instead!" Like, if my worst case scenario is some light humiliation and drowning my shame in 11 other cans of raviolis I feel like I can't lose
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Mar 15, 2017 17:17
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The point is you are blowing your emotional "I know you" gesture load before you're even dating. You are vastly increasing your chance of humiliation and becoming known as "that guy who thought a bunch of cheap canned ravioli would get him laid" instead of "thoughtful boyfriend who remembered this offhand comment i made a long time ago".
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Mar 15, 2017 17:23
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Goon gorges self instead of talking to woman. News at 11.
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Mar 15, 2017 17:24
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talking to women is overrated ravioli on the other hand is cool and owns
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Mar 15, 2017 17:27
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I mean, I was married to a Cult Leader's daughter for a few years, my last girlfriend and I met at fetish party inside of each other before dating for 2 years, my ex before that was a friend of mine who wanted help washing her hair so she invited herself over to take a shower with me... What i'm saying is I have absolutely no "normal dating experience" and dad-gummit, I do not intend to start now. I am almost 30 and believe in the power of grand, romantic gestures, bouyed by plump, beef ravioli. If you're relationship doesn't start with a weird/dark/hilarious/sweet anecdote, then you're basically just phoning in the romance, no? Asking people out on dates like a pleb just seems like a surefire recipe for disaster! (Amazon just messaged me, Raviolis en route) VendaGoat posted:Goon gorges self instead of talking to woman. News at 11. There is a >0% chance this is what happens Bust Rodd fucked around with this message at 17:33 on Mar 15, 2017 |
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Mar 15, 2017 17:31
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SpaceClown posted:talking to women is overrated See if they were homemade pirogi, I would sing a different tune.
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Mar 15, 2017 17:32
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Goon speed good sir
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Mar 15, 2017 17:33
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Bust Rodd posted:I mean, I was married to a Cult Leader's daughter for a few years, my last girlfriend and I met at fetish party inside of each other before dating for 2 years, my ex before that was a friend of mine who wanted help washing her hair so she invited herself over to take a shower with me... Tell her you want to reenact interior semiotics
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Mar 15, 2017 17:33
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VendaGoat posted:See if they were homemade pirogi, I would sing a different tune. doesn't matter, had pasta. 
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Mar 15, 2017 17:33
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You should at least make sure she likes you first before doing a grand gesture is the point I was trying to make. I mean really all you're doing is buying her lovely kids food she has nostalgia for and mentioned one time, you aren't giving her some long-lost family heirloom she has been searching for her entire life. However you are picturing it going, it's probably not going to happen that way and at best you'll get a "haha that's cool, I didn't know they still made these" and you'll still be in the same situation you are now, not arranging your wedding.
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Mar 15, 2017 17:34
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yeah I eat rear end posted:You should at least make sure she likes you first before doing a grand gesture is the point I was trying to make. It's been fifteen years and it is her favorite did you even read the thread
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Mar 15, 2017 17:35
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