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Ensign Expendable
Nov 11, 2008

Lager beer is proof that god loves us
Pillbug

Nenonen posted:

Dunno about that in particular (I have never heard that claim) but in general tanker helmets aren't meant to stop a piece of shrapnel or a bullet, they're riding a tank for that. The main purpose of tanker helmets is to protect your noggin from getting bruised from a bumpy ride inside a metal coffin.



These things don't have airbags.

When the Soviets were doing experiments with ramping BTs across rivers, they just tied the driver to his seat. Can't have whiplash in a rigid system (except when the ties break, oops).

JcDent posted:

British tank design was the biggest enemy
Let's s make our tank fast! It will cost armor, but we'll make up for it by adding a lovely gun!
Let's make our tank super armored! Sure, it will be slow, but we will undergun it, so whatever.
Let's make a fast tank with vertical armor in 1944!

And so on and so forth, till the blessed Centurion showed the Brits that you should only compromise in the engine compartment. And the British made quality slow tanks with lovely engines for 50+ years.

A 2-pdr ought to be good enough for anyone. You have a machinegun to deal with infantry, soldier!

Also, to be fair, they made a fast tank with vertical armour in 1942, it just took two years to make it battle worthy.

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

Churchills are apparently absurdly cramped. They had tiny little turrets because they were British tanks and therefore hilariously un-modern. I don't know how they fit 75mm guns into there, but I suppose the British were pretty good at stuffing big guns into small spaces.

1380 mm turret ring for three people. The loader's station was only 380 mm across. Even the gunner got more than that somehow.

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HEY GUNS
Oct 11, 2012

FOPTIMUS PRIME

MikeCrotch posted:

Haig's throwing French under the bus to take his job was pretty spectacular.

Also nothing beats the Germans for catty backbiting, either in WWI or WWII. Ludendorff declared that “I can only love and hate, and I hate General Falkenhayn,” and Sepp Dietrich came out with my all time favourite "“All he could do was stand on a tank and shout, 'I am the King of Africa,” about Rommel.
ww1 german generals were a lot worse than ww2 german generals about this, you'll note sepp dietrich just bitched and didn't get rommel fired

zoux
Apr 28, 2006


Looks like them Duke boys are at it again.

Ainsley McTree
Feb 19, 2004


zoux posted:

Looks like them Duke boys are at it again.

If only the tank was an M3 Lee

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

Churchills are apparently absurdly cramped. They had tiny little turrets because they were British tanks and therefore hilariously un-modern. I don't know how they fit 75mm guns into there, but I suppose the British were pretty good at stuffing big guns into small spaces.
I've got a source that's the diary of a Churchill commander in which he and his crew investigate a knocked out Panther. The consensus was "how do they fit any chickens in this at all?"

Throatwarbler
Nov 17, 2008

by vyelkin
What's the point of making very small ships that are also stuffed with expensive missiles and radars? Other than maybe slightly shallower draft. Seems like there's a downward limit where it's economical to have all that stuff and also have armor and sufficient crew to work everything and their food and whatnot.

MikeCrotch
Nov 5, 2011

I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

Throatwarbler posted:

What's the point of making very small ships that are also stuffed with expensive missiles and radars? Other than maybe slightly shallower draft. Seems like there's a downward limit where it's economical to have all that stuff and also have armor and sufficient crew to work everything and their food and whatnot.

You seem to have put more thought into this than the US Navy did

Quinntan
Sep 11, 2013

Throatwarbler posted:

What's the point of making very small ships that are also stuffed with expensive missiles and radars? Other than maybe slightly shallower draft. Seems like there's a downward limit where it's economical to have all that stuff and also have armor and sufficient crew to work everything and their food and whatnot.

Modern warships don't really have armour now.

PittTheElder
Feb 13, 2012

:geno: Yes, it's like a lava lamp.

Throatwarbler posted:

What's the point of making very small ships that are also stuffed with expensive missiles and radars? Other than maybe slightly shallower draft. Seems like there's a downward limit where it's economical to have all that stuff and also have armor and sufficient crew to work everything and their food and whatnot.

I think the argument is that it's impossible to effectively armor warships against the threats they face these days. So instead you discard armor, build them small and (in theory) cheap, and make plays into low observability.

Slim Jim Pickens
Jan 16, 2012

Arquinsiel posted:

I've got a source that's the diary of a Churchill commander in which he and his crew investigate a knocked out Panther. The consensus was "how do they fit any chickens in this at all?"

afaik the Panther's hull is stuffed full with its giant engine and the raised driveshaft. Perhaps the Churchill had something a little more modest?

KYOON GRIFFEY JR
Apr 12, 2010



Runner-up, TRP Sack Race 2021/22

Throatwarbler posted:

What's the point of making very small ships that are also stuffed with expensive missiles and radars? Other than maybe slightly shallower draft. Seems like there's a downward limit where it's economical to have all that stuff and also have armor and sufficient crew to work everything and their food and whatnot.

The good implementation of this already exists as the FAC or missile boat, but that doesn't allow you to put stuff on shore or board ships really. Ships aren't armored and you really do not need very much crew to work a modern warship. Complement on a La Fayette is like 140 all ranks.

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Cyrano4747 posted:

Fixed that for you

It's a coping mechanism

They need their boaty safe space (shh don't tell them the bulkhead is actually the side of the tent)

Hogge Wild
Aug 21, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Pillbug

bewbies posted:

LCS is kind of a different thing altogether....they are tiny and basically intended to fight brown water threats only, and as far as I'm aware there really isn't an historical equivalent....maybe....triremes? Coastal battleships? Monitors? Coast Guard cutters?

The Zumwalts were designed as destroyers for whatever reason despite being the size of a WWII heavy cruiser but they've been Nunn-McCurdied into oblivion. Right now it is looking like ABs all the way down for the forseeable future.

mllaneza posted:

The USN is now talking about something in the 4000 ton range to pack a bigger anti-surface punch than the LCS ever could. They're calling it a frigate.

http://www.scout.com/military/warrior/story/1677469-navy-to-upgun-change-new-frigate

They really remind me of the coastal defense ships, which were about the same size and also used stealth technology:



Väinämöinen

Hogge Wild fucked around with this message at 23:05 on Apr 18, 2017

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

Churchills are apparently absurdly cramped. They had tiny little turrets because they were British tanks and therefore hilariously un-modern. I don't know how they fit 75mm guns into there, but I suppose the British were pretty good at stuffing big guns into small spaces.

They did fit the firefly with a anti-tank gun that other people assumed was just too big for the sherman

Though that sorta begs the question why the British were so gun shy (heh) about giving their tanks proper firepower



Also, Dear Mr. EnsignExpendible, do you have a good source on the Elephant having 2 tons of copper inside them? For that matter, is there any good info on the Maus's drivetrain? In the scale model thread we're trying to build our P.1000 Rattes and suddenly find myself interested in woebegone Nazi gas-electric drivetrains. I'm also vaguely curious as to how the T-28 super tank destroyer / the Tortise managed to move themselves (though I think their weight was in the 70-80 ton range, so America/Britain could swing straight mechanical.)

I ask these things because it seems to me that once a vehicle gets to a certain size/mass, having it driven by electricity is pretty much the only way to do it. You avoid (basically) the complexities and weight of a transmission, and the problem of having a great metal sprocket driving metal tracks.

Ensign Expendable
Nov 11, 2008

Lager beer is proof that god loves us
Pillbug

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

afaik the Panther's hull is stuffed full with its giant engine and the raised driveshaft. Perhaps the Churchill had something a little more modest?

The British assessment of the Panther says that it would be fine if the internal components were shuffled around a little, but they are inexplicably placed in the worst possible spots.

Ensign Expendable
Nov 11, 2008

Lager beer is proof that god loves us
Pillbug

Nebakenezzer posted:

They did fit the firefly with a anti-tank gun that other people assumed was just too big for the sherman

Though that sorta begs the question why the British were so gun shy (heh) about giving their tanks proper firepower

The Americans didn't forego the 17-pdr because they thought it wouldn't fit, they just didn't think it had enough benefits over the 76 mm M1 to bother.

quote:

Also, Dear Mr. EnsignExpendible, do you have a good source on the Elephant having 2 tons of copper inside them?

I got that figure from the SVAG archive. I don't have a number, but I do have the scans from a report by Rudolph Mann. If you want to brave the SVAG website, that name will probably lead you to a cite-able source.

quote:

For that matter, is there any good info on the Maus's drivetrain? In the scale model thread we're trying to build our P.1000 Rattes and suddenly find myself interested in woebegone Nazi gas-electric drivetrains. I'm also vaguely curious as to how the T-28 super tank destroyer / the Tortise managed to move themselves (though I think their weight was in the 70-80 ton range, so America/Britain could swing straight mechanical.)

I ask these things because it seems to me that once a vehicle gets to a certain size/mass, having it driven by electricity is pretty much the only way to do it. You avoid (basically) the complexities and weight of a transmission, and the problem of having a great metal sprocket driving metal tracks.

I'll have to check Pasholok's book once I get home, I think he had drawings of the engine and generators.

The Soviets had an 80 ton tank prototype before the war, but it kept breaking down for some reason.

champagne posting
Apr 5, 2006

YOU ARE A BRAIN
IN A BUNKER


Ensign Expendable posted:

The British assessment of the Panther says that it would be fine if the internal components were shuffled around a little, but they are inexplicably placed in the worst possible spots.

Where were the internals placed, and where should they have been?

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

afaik the Panther's hull is stuffed full with its giant engine and the raised driveshaft. Perhaps the Churchill had something a little more modest?
They literally evaluated tanks on the single criteria of how easy it was to get a chicken in a cage in and out of it. Having your chickens inside the hull where shrapnel wouldn't end your egg supply was a major plus point in any tank design.

steinrokkan
Apr 2, 2011



Soiled Meat

Hogge Wild posted:

They really remind me of the coastal defense ships, which were about the same size and also used stealth technology:



Väinämöinen

Camo on ships worked really well, though, especially in the Pacific when the harsh sunlight and sharp contrasts between sky and ocean made subtle irregularities literally impossible for human perception to pick up.


kill me now
Sep 14, 2003

Why's Hank crying?

'CUZ HE JUST GOT DUNKED ON!

KYOON GRIFFEY JR posted:

The good implementation of this already exists as the FAC or missile boat, but that doesn't allow you to put stuff on shore or board ships really. Ships aren't armored and you really do not need very much crew to work a modern warship. Complement on a La Fayette is like 140 all ranks.

A FAC or missile boat can't sail from CONUS to all the places we would actually want to use a LCS on their own like the LCS can.

Phanatic
Mar 13, 2007

Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

kill me now posted:

A FAC or missile boat can't sail from CONUS to all the places we would actually want to use a LCS on their own like the LCS can.

When a missile corvette or diesel sub from the 80s can blow your LCS right out of the water because it really can't defend itself against either and the crew is too small for damage control, what is the list of places that we would actually use an LCS on its own?

Slim Jim Pickens
Jan 16, 2012

Arquinsiel posted:

They literally evaluated tanks on the single criteria of how easy it was to get a chicken in a cage in and out of it. Having your chickens inside the hull where shrapnel wouldn't end your egg supply was a major plus point in any tank design.

Explains the Maus.

Mazz
Dec 12, 2012

Orion, this is Sperglord Actual.
Come on home.
People call the F-35 a boondoggle but really they should look at the LCS and just stare in awe. The F-35 will probably end up pretty good at the thing it was designed to do. The USN didn't need a fleet of 50kt coast guard cutters.

The fact that the Navy is just now going "maybe this should've been a real OHP replacement in the first place" kind of blows my loving mind.

I think the only good that could come out of the LCS at this point is the mine countermeasures module pans out so they have a use as minesweepers before the Navy slowly forgets how important that poo poo is to maintain.

Mazz fucked around with this message at 00:36 on Apr 19, 2017

Polyakov
Mar 22, 2012


Mazz posted:

People call the F-35 a boondoggle but really they should look at the LCS and just stare in awe. The F-35 will probably end up pretty good at the thing it was designed to do. The USN didn't need a fleet of 50kt coast guard cutters.

The fact that the Navy is just now going "maybe this should've been a real OHP replacement in the first place" kind of blows my loving mind.

I think the only good that could come out of the LCS at this point is the mine countermeasures module pans out so they have a use as minesweepers before the Navy slowly forgets how important that poo poo is to maintain.

Now now, its not like the US navy has been denied access to major areas of sea by mine designes dating back to the 1800's twice since the end of WW2 or anything. Im sure they have learned this time.

Ensign Expendable
Nov 11, 2008

Lager beer is proof that god loves us
Pillbug

Boiled Water posted:

Where were the internals placed, and where should they have been?

Like the sights and pedals and flywheels and other controls. If they were just a few inches to the left or right, they would be fine, but the way they were positioned made them really hard to use.

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

Watching the AN-94 episode of Forgotten weapons and :psypop: you're just asking for the drat gun to break with that kind of Rube Goldberg poo poo.

Jack2142
Jul 17, 2014

Shitposting in Seattle

mllaneza posted:

The USN is now talking about something in the 4000 ton range to pack a bigger anti-surface punch than the LCS ever could. They're calling it a frigate.

http://www.scout.com/military/warrior/story/1677469-navy-to-upgun-change-new-frigate

I predict 2 get built for $100,000,000,000 a piece before the class is canceled

Phanatic
Mar 13, 2007

Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

Polyakov posted:

Now now, its not like the US navy has been denied access to major areas of sea by mine designes dating back to the 1800's twice since the end of WW2 or anything. Im sure they have learned this time.

What are you referring to? Mines didn't stop us from going where we wanted to go during the Tanker War. They inflicted casualties but that's not the same thing.

Polyakov
Mar 22, 2012


The first instance I'm referring to is the mining of the Korean beaches at Wonsan during the Korean war where they were held up for weeks by the mines.

The second is indeed the tanker war, they nearly lost the USS Samuel B Roberts to a mine strike, when they first encountered the minefields they had to use the supertankers they were meant to be escorting as big shields and realised that they didnt have any MCM vessels worth a drat because they farmed that capability out to NATO and so when the UK and France didnt want to get involved the US had no real sweeping capacity. Having to hide behind civillian ships and being essentially unable to safely sail the sea with their own capabilities which i would class as denying them access, eventually the UK and France found their balls and sent some minesweepers and the US got its Korean war era mothballs out that they built in response to the last time they were embarassed.

The Iraqis also denied a USMC landing at Kuwait Harbor during Gulf 1 with mines.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

PittTheElder posted:

I think the argument is that it's impossible to effectively armor warships against the threats they face these days. So instead you discard armor, build them small and (in theory) cheap, and make plays into low observability.

But if you've discarded 'cheap' (which many designers have), what is the remaining advantage of being small?

Fangz
Jul 5, 2007

Oh I see! This must be the Bad Opinion Zone!

The Lone Badger posted:

But if you've discarded 'cheap' (which many designers have), what is the remaining advantage of being small?

Hard to detect by radar is a big deal.

Throatwarbler
Nov 17, 2008

by vyelkin
Being bigger allows more survivability since there's more stuff to get in the way of anything hitting the ship, even if it isn't all 2' plate or whatever, I mean diesel fuel is pretty good armor right? You can also sustain for longer since you can carry more missiles and food, more crew means more damage control and less stress, and you can at least add a little bit of armor to the critical parts, there are other things that can hit you besides KH-22s.

Your tiny mini destroyer still needs radar and missiles, they're never going to be cheap or expendable, not if you also want them to fight, so what's the point of making them small?

BattleMoose
Jun 16, 2010

Throatwarbler posted:

Your tiny mini destroyer still needs radar and missiles, they're never going to be cheap or expendable, not if you also want them to fight, so what's the point of making them small?

I think the general idea is that for a given amount of resources you can have a few big ships or more smaller ones. Bigger ones have the advantage of better/more sensors, defensive capabilities and greater survivability and range.

Smaller ones have the advantage of being more difficult to detect and numbers. Having seven independent launch platforms instead of three or two means your enemy has more targets to neutralize.

A big part of what is "better" will be answered in terms of missile interception capabilities. An Aegis isn't going to be able to be fit onto everything. I doubt we are at the point where we could have a command ship coordinating the defensive fire (and offensive) from multiple other vessels but that would be very potent.

OctaviusBeaver
Apr 30, 2009

Say what now?

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Part of the reason Chancellorsville turned into such a clusterfuck for the Union was because Hooker was more or less incapacitated for most of it because he happened to get too close to a rebel cannonball.

This seems like it would be fairly predictable. Did these guys not have a second in command who could take over if the general was killed or wounded?

FAUXTON
Jun 2, 2005

spero che tu stia bene

OctaviusBeaver posted:

This seems like it would be fairly predictable. Did these guys not have a second in command who could take over if the general was killed or wounded?

The problem was that there were a great many who were salivating at the chance to do so.

Gnoman
Feb 12, 2014

Come, all you fair and tender maids
Who flourish in your pri-ime
Beware, take care, keep your garden fair
Let Gnoman steal your thy-y-me
Le-et Gnoman steal your thyme




Nebakenezzer posted:


Though that sorta begs the question why the British were so gun shy (heh) about giving their tanks proper firepower



There were several factors.

First, the 2-pounder was supposed to be replaced in production by the 6-pounder (which was an excellent AT gun in 1940) much earlier, but that changed after Dunkirk. With the near-total los of the BEF's equipment, the British was forced to make the decision between keeping the old gun in production and having a sub-par weapon; or else go ahead and retool for the new one and have essentially no weapon at all for almost a year. Staring down the threat of an actual invasion (Sealion looked much more feasible from London in 1940 than it does in hindsight), the choice was easy.

Second, with the Battle of Britain raging, the bulk of resources went to AA and Fighter Command. Tanks had to take a back seat for awhile.

Third, a lot of Britain's tank manufacturers had trouble making decent-sized turret rings. Small rings=small turrets=small guns.

Finally, their projects to make really good tanks kept running into delays caused by making perfect the enemy of the good.

FastestGunAlive
Apr 7, 2010

Dancing palm tree.

Polyakov posted:

.

The Iraqis also denied a USMC landing at Kuwait Harbor during Gulf 1 with mines.

The landing was a deception plan that was never intended to occur

Polyakov
Mar 22, 2012


FastestGunAlive posted:

The landing was a deception plan that was never intended to occur

Fair comment, I hosed up why the Kuwait harbor landing was cancelled, but while they were trying to carry out the deception plan they did have the USS Tripoli and Princeton both hit mines and were pretty severely damaged. It was fortunate that it was called off in retrospect because the USN evidently still didn't have the capability to break through that minefield.

OwlFancier
Aug 22, 2013

Arquinsiel posted:

They literally evaluated tanks on the single criteria of how easy it was to get a chicken in a cage in and out of it. Having your chickens inside the hull where shrapnel wouldn't end your egg supply was a major plus point in any tank design.

Why is the chicken required for this test?

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Polyakov
Mar 22, 2012


OwlFancier posted:

Why is the chicken required for this test?

If you are using the cage for the test where do you keep your chicken?

We arent made of cages over here.

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