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# ? May 6, 2017 15:29 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 08:10 |
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Malachi Constant posted:In 1979 an ex-green beret named Barry Sadler wrote a book called Casca: The Eternal Mercenary which chronicled the life of the Roman soldier who was given the job of marching some guy he'd never heard of named Jesus to the cross and standing guard until he died. He decides to help Jesus out by stabbing him with a spear, then Jesus curses him to live as a soldier until the second coming. My favorite is the one where he looks like Fabio with the long flowing locks and no hat on whatsoever. My second favorite is the one where he just has a cool Zorro headband.
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# ? May 6, 2017 15:36 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 15:54 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 16:14 |
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I can't help but think you people are not taking Casca: The Eternal Mercenary seriously. That's more like it.
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# ? May 6, 2017 16:28 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 16:53 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 19:04 |
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Cursed, you say?
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# ? May 6, 2017 20:43 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 21:09 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 22:32 |
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# ? May 6, 2017 22:44 |
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The original covers are way cooler
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# ? May 7, 2017 00:38 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 00:52 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 01:03 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 01:39 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 01:43 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 01:54 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 03:02 |
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So, wait. Is the guy serially reincarnated, or just immortal? And how come the curse also comes with time travel powers to be in Ancient China despite being cursed by a dying jesus? Also, those covers should be one of those "Person doesn't change facial expressions" gifs. Also also, Vampire the Requiem clearly tells us that the soldier who speared Jesus in the side was named Longinus, and he was the first vampire. Did both these guys stab jesus? Which one did it first? Was it a peer pressure thing? Why did they get different curses? Something tells me these books weren't very well thought out.
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# ? May 7, 2017 04:48 |
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Has the look of a man that says "Can you believe this poo poo?"
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# ? May 7, 2017 06:05 |
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The FIRST thing that came to mind
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# ? May 7, 2017 06:50 |
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literally lmao my rear end is off
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# ? May 7, 2017 07:43 |
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gnarlyhotep posted:literally lmao rear end off to you, sir!
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# ? May 7, 2017 08:07 |
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a cyberpunk goose posted:rear end off to you, sir! no serieously it went down the storm drain, we're calling the city
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# ? May 7, 2017 08:09 |
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Elfface posted:So, wait. Is the guy serially reincarnated, or just immortal? And how come the curse also comes with time travel powers to be in Ancient China despite being cursed by a dying jesus? He's immortal and has healing powers like Wolverine. He first travels to China in ~100-200 AD. His full name is Casca Rufio Longinus. The spear he used becomes a sacred relic called the Spear of Longinus (As seen in Wolfenstein: The Spear of Destiny). Vampires are not real. Only Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and the guy that stabbed him are real. Geez.
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# ? May 7, 2017 09:34 |
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Lmbo
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# ? May 7, 2017 11:35 |
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So Casca's an Immortal?
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# ? May 7, 2017 12:38 |
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# ? May 7, 2017 13:52 |
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Horseshoe theory posted:So Casca's an Immortal?
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# ? May 7, 2017 14:19 |
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giddyup!
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# ? May 7, 2017 17:31 |
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Better Fred Than Dead posted:The original covers are way cooler Yeah, the new covers are downright infantile. Always pay for an artist, folks. Elfface posted:So, wait. Is the guy serially reincarnated, or just immortal? And how come the curse also comes with time travel powers to be in Ancient China despite being cursed by a dying jesus? All men's adventure novels are either written by diehard right-wing freaks who believe whatever the party line is or left-wing people looking for a quick paycheck. So you either get some bland diatribes by lonely old white guys who are way into gun specs or underage sex (William Johnstone, come on down) or actual authors who write well but need some cash (Will Murray, who now writes a poo poo ton of Doc Savage novels) to make the rent. So yeah, these weren't thought out at all. They were designed to appeal to someone in a grocery store to pick up a copy and make a sale. That said, Casca does hold a very unique place in the annals of Men's Adventure novels: two of the 'new' novels were plagiarized from the guy who wrote the Rambo novels. More can be found at the Wikipedia entry for the series in the second paragraph.
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# ? May 7, 2017 17:31 |
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I read one of these; I think it was Casca the Barbarian but he was basically a Viking. He and his bros rescue a bunch of women being raped and the women reward the good guys with immediate sex. Later, Casca is imprisoned with no food for over a year but since he can't actually starve to death he just resorts to eating his fingernails to soothe his hunger. There's a happy ending though - he marries a blind princess and since she can't see him she doesn't realize he never ages. He stays with her until she dies of old age then returns to his cursed wanderings. There weirdest part of the book was that whole sentences of inconsequential descriptions and such were repeated, sometimes just a few paragraphs apart. The new cover for Casca the Eternal Mercenary was an attempt to cash in on Russell Crowe's turn as Gladiator, right? If it came first, that's a little uncanny.
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# ? May 7, 2017 19:29 |
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KrolleBolle posted:Lmbo Steve Enh-stin
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# ? May 7, 2017 20:00 |
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pretend i posted the cloud atlas character chart, except its cloud cascas and all the actors are the different casca
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# ? May 7, 2017 21:26 |
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Pneub posted:Am I the only one who sees it? this is still one of my favorites.
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# ? May 7, 2017 22:25 |
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Pierogi posted:giddyup!
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# ? May 7, 2017 22:46 |
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My dad owns all those books.
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# ? May 8, 2017 02:08 |
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Perfection.
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# ? May 8, 2017 08:44 |
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temple posted:My dad owns all those books. Have you read them?
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# ? May 8, 2017 14:42 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 08:10 |
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lol
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# ? May 8, 2017 16:11 |