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Collateral Damage posted:I feel like there should have been a couple of red flags before they got married here. Yeah, who the hell would marry a kiwi?
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May 9, 2017 11:38
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An emu or other flightless bird?
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May 9, 2017 12:05
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Stringent posted:Yeah, who the hell would marry a kiwi? I like to eat kiwi
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May 9, 2017 12:05
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Collateral Damage posted:I feel like there should have been a couple of red flags before they got married here. like this? 
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May 9, 2017 12:09
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I would blow Dane Cook posted:A Kiwi friend of mine has married her Chinese husband. She is mid-30s, got married last year. She has had some health issues but seems ok now. Hubby is around the same age and is the 2nd son. A musician (ex indie music scene) and I reckon he's slapped her around at least a couple of times (she had to stay at my place for a couple of nights soon after they got married because all of a sudden he realised he was married and the pressure of being a 'provider' (which he isn't, she supports him) got to him (I got wechat message messages saying he was going to throw all her belongings out of their 6 story apartment if she didn't contact him, usual passive aggressive Chinese emotional bullshit). They could not get married until the older brother had married. And they can't have kids until the older brother has a child first, despite my friend's advancing age (pretty sure she is now 38). I told her they should just go for it but she said nah, can't do it. The MIL would kill them and it would be a total loss of face for the older brother and his wife. How hosed up is that??? If she's mid-30s and the older brother hasn't had kids yet, he's probably hitting infertility. Good luck with that.
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May 9, 2017 12:22
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The hosed up thing isn't expecting he older brother to do Life Accomplishments first, the hosed up thing is (marrying a guy who completely allows his) parents to have the absolute authority about those decisions.
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May 9, 2017 12:32
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WarpedNaba posted:If she's mid-30s and the older brother hasn't had kids yet, he's probably hitting infertility. Good luck with that. OTOH, that makes sure that these genes don't get propagated. A win for everyone. Ahhhh, nature.
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May 9, 2017 12:36
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I would blow Dane Cook posted:A Kiwi friend of mine has married her Chinese husband. She is mid-30s, got married last year. She has had some health issues but seems ok now. Hubby is around the same age and is the 2nd son. A musician (ex indie music scene) and I reckon he's slapped her around at least a couple of times (she had to stay at my place for a couple of nights soon after they got married because all of a sudden he realised he was married and the pressure of being a 'provider' (which he isn't, she supports him) got to him (I got wechat message messages saying he was going to throw all her belongings out of their 6 story apartment if she didn't contact him, usual passive aggressive Chinese emotional bullshit). They could not get married until the older brother had married. And they can't have kids until the older brother has a child first, despite my friend's advancing age (pretty sure she is now 38). I told her they should just go for it but she said nah, can't do it. The MIL would kill them and it would be a total loss of face for the older brother and his wife. How hosed up is that??? WHAT THE gently caress IS WRONG WITH THEM
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May 9, 2017 12:52
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gently caress THAT MOTHER IN LAW AND gently caress THEIR FAMILY
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May 9, 2017 12:53
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I'm so loving glad that my fiance's family is actually nice. Like all of them are nice. And so is my mom. Sometimes I'm jealous of my mom giving me poo poo in front of my fiance but then maybe i do deserve it
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May 9, 2017 12:53
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Obviously the family (parents are divorced and the father is rather absent) is still quite traditional. So birth order and consequently precedence is important. The first born son is supposed to be the most successful, in addition to being responsible for looking after the parents in their old age (as a foreign female if you want a hope of some independence over your life, do NOT marry a first born Chinese son) and he should reach all of life's milestones before his younger brother. This is the traditional way of doing things, and therefore shows you have a successful family, which is where the face comes in. Typing this it sounds crazy, but that is the way it goes. One of my female students told me her father was the second son. Her uncle, the first born son, hadn't had children. So her grandmother told her father, the second son, to give his son (her brother) to his older brother. So the 2nd son dutifully handed over his son to his older brother who lived in a different province. Gender and birth order is extremely important in many families. This should give some insight into why sex selective abortion has been, and still is, such an issue.
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May 9, 2017 13:08
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Yeah I have plenty of friends who went through this stuff. One in Korea was in a relationship and going to get married but her older brother was single, so she was not permitted. She had to live at home with mom and dad and have a curfew and no life at all with her fiance, and her older brother was, surprise, gay! So marriage literally never going to happen, therefore she is having to wait until her parents are dead before she can leave the house.
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May 9, 2017 13:34
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Lol at knowing your friend is the victim of domestic abuse and consequently telling her she should totally 'go for' having a kid with said abuser.
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May 9, 2017 13:39
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Grand Fromage posted:therefore she is having to wait until her parents are dead before she can leave the house.
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May 9, 2017 13:46
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Grand Fromage posted:Yeah I have plenty of friends who went through this stuff. One in Korea was in a relationship and going to get married but her older brother was single, so she was not permitted. She had to live at home with mom and dad and have a curfew and no life at all with her fiance, and her older brother was, surprise, gay! So marriage literally never going to happen, therefore she is having to wait until her parents are dead before she can leave the house. She should take a page out of the /r/relationships thread and  her parents
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May 9, 2017 13:55
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Or just have her own life and tell her parents to deal with it but nobody ever listens to that.
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May 9, 2017 14:03
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Anyone wanna have a laugh? http://www.globaltimes.cn/content/1045919.shtml quote:The Russian authorities need to unblock WeChat as soon as possible once the popular mobile communication tool, developed by Chinese Internet giant Tencent Holdings, meets the requirements of Russia's regulations for Internet management.
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May 9, 2017 15:13
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I would blow Dane Cook posted:Obviously the family (parents are divorced and the father is rather absent) is still quite traditional. Divorce is a very modern convention  What a modern mother 
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May 9, 2017 15:26
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Jeoh posted:Anyone wanna have a laugh? China getting butthurt that other countries are blocking their internet stuff is the greatest thing.
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May 9, 2017 15:31
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Actually, My grand father had a lot of kids and his brother had trouble conceiving even though he legally had 3 wives at the same time in Hong Kong. Polygamy was still legalized in Hong Kong until 1971, quite traditional! So my grand father gave one of his sons to my grand uncle for him to continue his blood line. Also very traditional. Then turns out my grand uncle had another son afterwards and they grew up fine until recently they were fighting over the pittance of an inheritance. The must wait until X has a child / X is married is the dumbest poo poo ever. Like holy poo poo, pick and choose your traditions to uphold. I'm sure not being a loving rear end in a top hat to your kids and being responsible parents is the biggest grandfather clause of all cultural traditions and survival of human civilization.
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May 9, 2017 15:32
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Grand Fromage posted:China getting butthurt that other countries are blocking their internet stuff is the greatest thing.
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May 9, 2017 15:32
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Jeoh posted:Anyone wanna have a laugh? 
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May 9, 2017 15:41
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Jeoh posted:Anyone wanna have a laugh? Yeah, kinda sucks when things you like/use a lot are blocked doesn't it?
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May 9, 2017 16:05
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It's already been unblocked, I can use it again. Edit: Nope not now, odd. Still funny because it's ironic. Xerxes17 fucked around with this message at 16:09 on May 9, 2017 |
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May 9, 2017 16:07
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https://my.mixtape.moe/eoslrl.mp4 starts slow but gets super good at 20 seconds
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May 9, 2017 16:37
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/\ Da gently caress? How do you do that? How do you run into a massive, slow-moving truck like that? Dude must have been texting or something.caberham posted:Like holy poo poo, pick and choose your traditions to uphold. I'm sure not being a loving rear end in a top hat to your kids and being responsible parents is the biggest grandfather clause of all cultural traditions and survival of human civilization. Chinese culture with regards to family is literally, "How can I make everyone else take care of me?" A selfless parent/grandparent or other relative is extremely rare from what I have seen. My mother in law's mother died two weeks ago. She knew it was happening, and told my mother in law to go to Canada and take care of my wife who is pregnant, and to welcome her great-grandson into the world, because she knew she would never meet him. She was a selfless single mother, and 100% against the grain when it came to traditional elderly Chinese behaviour. My mother in law took care of her mom better than any of her other children, but her mother couldn't bear the thought of her daughter missing out on seeing her grandson being born. My father in law's parents on the other hand have been feeling "unwell" (persistent on and off again colds), and told him not to go to see his grandson being born since he has to take care of them. My father in law is the second youngest of 4 boys, and his sister married a rich guy and is the favourite child. They don't care about my father in law seeing his grandson, and don't care if he has to wait 10 years for them to finally die before he can see him. All they care about is that their needs are being taken care of, and nobody else matters. Blistex fucked around with this message at 16:51 on May 9, 2017 |
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May 9, 2017 16:48
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I would blow Dane Cook posted:A Kiwi friend of mine has married her Chinese husband. She is mid-30s, got married last year. She has had some health issues but seems ok now. Hubby is around the same age and is the 2nd son. A musician (ex indie music scene) and I reckon he's slapped her around at least a couple of times (she had to stay at my place for a couple of nights soon after they got married because all of a sudden he realised he was married and the pressure of being a 'provider' (which he isn't, she supports him) got to him (I got wechat message messages saying he was going to throw all her belongings out of their 6 story apartment if she didn't contact him, usual passive aggressive Chinese emotional bullshit). They could not get married until the older brother had married. And they can't have kids until the older brother has a child first, despite my friend's advancing age (pretty sure she is now 38). I told her they should just go for it but she said nah, can't do it. The MIL would kill them and it would be a total loss of face for the older brother and his wife. How hosed up is that??? ur friends already dead sorry
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May 9, 2017 16:49
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LentThem posted:https://my.mixtape.moe/eoslrl.mp4 When I used to teach at the new campus outside the city the bus would have to do a U-turn at the traffic lights just after getting off the highway to get to the gate. The road wasn't very wide so the bus didn't have enough room to turn if he stayed in the left lane like he should so he would pull over to the right and wait for the light to go red then do the U-turn. One day whilst doing this a guy on a motorbike came flying along lane splitting through the red light straight into the side of the giant easily visible bus and then tried to blame the bus driver.
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May 9, 2017 17:04
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In Kyoto recently there have been a bunch of posters posted recently that depict a woman's laughing face on a backing of the Japanese e flag and say 「私、日本人でよかった」 or "I'm glad I'm (I was born as) Japanese". There's been a bit of discussion on it on the internet and social media because of the nationalist and ethnocentrist implications, especially as it's not part of any other message; purely "I'm glad I'm of the Japanese race" with no other context. It makes some people uncomforta But low and behold someone did some sleuthing, and the stock photo model used in the picture? Chinese. https://www.buzzfeed.com/tatsunoritokushige/poster?utm_term=.paLOYjwed#.ffvkb8PJ5
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May 9, 2017 17:39
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Blistex posted:/\ Da gently caress? How do you do that? How do you run into a massive, slow-moving truck like that? Dude must have been texting or something. You can see how the tries to cut in front of the truck, but then realizes that he's too slow for that, but already too fast to brake. lol
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May 9, 2017 17:40
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JaucheCharly posted:You can see how the tries to cut in front of the truck, but then realizes that he's too slow for that, but already too fast to brake. lol Normally its the dump trucks that have issues with braking speed/space and end up running into things. It's refreshing to see the roles reversed.
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May 9, 2017 18:01
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I know this is an insane question to ask regarding china, but who had the right of way? The trucks turning left seemed to be cutting off people traveling on the main road.
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May 9, 2017 18:04
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LentThem posted:https://my.mixtape.moe/eoslrl.mp4 I'm the driver of the tube-carrying truck who looks straight at a man who is on fire and rolling on the ground and decides "nah gently caress this, I'm driving around it".
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May 9, 2017 18:41
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Im the truck that immediately bursts into a giant ball of flames after a 10mph impact
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May 9, 2017 18:49
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Baronjutter posted:I know this is an insane question to ask regarding china, but who had the right of way? The trucks turning left seemed to be cutting off people traveling on the main road. It seems be an issue with the road design (shocking, I know). I can't see any traffic lights anywhere in the frame, which leads me to believe there aren't any, which is crazy. With an intersection of that size and traffic the truck is facing the reality of "wait here for an hour until no traffic is passing either direction at this free market intersection, or just go at some point and make people wait." He was probably technically in the wrong but that road design is insane and begging for accidents.
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May 9, 2017 18:50
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Oberleutnant posted:Im the truck that immediately bursts into a giant ball of flames after a 10mph impact he crashed right into the gas tank.
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May 9, 2017 19:11
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Chomp8645 posted:It seems be an issue with the road design (shocking, I know). I can't see any traffic lights anywhere in the frame, which leads me to believe there aren't any, which is crazy. With an intersection of that size and traffic the truck is facing the reality of "wait here for an hour until no traffic is passing either direction at this free market intersection, or just go at some point and make people wait." outside of any major city that is the way the roads are, you just kind of do what this truck driver did, you slowly inch your way out over the course of about 45 seconds to a minute and then join traffic. hell, people do that in the big cities even when they aren't supposed to
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May 9, 2017 23:21
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Chomp8645 posted:It seems be an issue with the road design (shocking, I know). I can't see any traffic lights anywhere in the frame, which leads me to believe there aren't any, which is crazy. With an intersection of that size and traffic the truck is facing the reality of "wait here for an hour until no traffic is passing either direction at this free market intersection, or just go at some point and make people wait." Judging by the video it looks pretty rural and once you leave the cities in China things like "traffic lights" and "electricity" go away pretty fast, so yeah it's safe to say there were no lights or anything directing traffic and drivers kind of do whatever.
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May 9, 2017 23:31
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Magna Kaser posted:Judging by the video it looks pretty rural and once you leave the cities in China things like "traffic lights" and "electricity" go away pretty fast, so yeah it's safe to say there were no lights or anything directing traffic and drivers kind of do whatever. It happened in Nanchang 
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May 9, 2017 23:49
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peanut posted:The hosed up thing isn't expecting he older brother to do Life Accomplishments first, the hosed up thing is (marrying a guy who completely allows his) parents to have the absolute authority about those decisions. I wont derail with my own side story about asian mother in laws. But a common response i've seen to situations likes this is "Its my/their cutlure. Who are you to judge it" I do feel sorry for the lady though.
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May 10, 2017 00:03
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