May Current Events: i was drunk and getting fisted by dr doom and had an IV of straig

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > May Current Events: i was drunk and getting fisted by dr doom and had an IV of straig

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shyduck: Oct 3, 2003

Anything with the word "lynch" in it just probably be avoided at all costs

# ? May 13, 2017 22:08

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# ? May 12, 2024 07:44

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

shyduck posted:

Anything with the word "lynch" in it just probably be avoided at all costs

Tracy Porter agrees. :hawksin:

# ? May 13, 2017 22:13

Casimir Radon: Aug 2, 2008

psydude posted:

Just think of how much someone has to suck to look at all of the other universities in Virginia and say, "I want to go to Liberty."

They take home schooled idiots sight unseen so that's the kind of people who want to go.

# ? May 13, 2017 22:13

crazyivan45: Apr 30, 2008

Supposedly Liberty has a decent flight program. I flew with a flight instructor from there once, she was a decent pilot but man she was unbelievably socially awkward

# ? May 13, 2017 22:15

Woof Blitzer: Dec 29, 2012; [-]

shyduck posted:

Anything with the word "lynch" in it just probably be avoided at all costs

David Lynch

# ? May 13, 2017 22:15

Nostalgia4Butts: Jun 1, 2006; WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

Woof Blitzer posted:

David Lynch

poo poo yes twin peaks soon

# ? May 13, 2017 22:48

Waroduce: Aug 5, 2008

SwampDonkey posted:

https://twitter.com/RVAwonk/status/863479169556074496

Someone talk about this. Does this matter? Whose the GOP rep

# ? May 13, 2017 22:58

SwampDonkey: Oct 13, 2006; by Smythe
(and can't post for 4 years!)

Not a fan of his but whatevs

# ? May 13, 2017 22:59

facialimpediment: Feb 11, 2005; as the world turns

Waroduce posted:

Someone talk about this. Does this matter? Whose the GOP rep

Whatevs is about right. He's a National Security Republican, so you could disagree with him a lot on the usual stuff, but he very clearly gives a poo poo about defense issues in the national security realm. I'd like to think of him as a "neutral" Republican, like if you would think of your standard Republican in the 2005-2010 timeframe. I could be very wrong about that, but he's the kind of Republican that you would sort of want to be in Congress, at least for National Security issues.

But I really came here to link this article, because it has literally everything I love in a Donnie story.

https://twitter.com/PhilipRucker/status/863513393675870208

- A "GOP figure close to the White House" wonders whether Trump is �in the grip of some kind of paranoid delusion�

- "Lots of internal blame for WH comms shop: "They were running around like chickens with their heads cut off.�"

- "Trump is personally conducting postmortems with some aides to investigate the unending stream of bad headlines"

- "Trump is cracking down on leaks, according to White House officials who spoke to @PhilipRucker (and leaked that)"

:fap:

# ? May 13, 2017 23:21

Genocide Tendency: Dec 24, 2009; I get mental health care from the medical equivalent of Skillcraft.

North Korea launching/firing poo poo again.

# ? May 13, 2017 23:22

Beeb: Jun 29, 2003

McNally posted:

Is there anything in Lynchburg worth visiting? 'Cause goddamn, I think it might almost be worth a drive out there to troll those fucks.

Nothing that can't be acquired or observed elsewhere. There's the Civil War with a heavy leaning to the ~*Glory of the Confederahceh*~ side of things museum nearby in Appomattox, but that's it.

Richard Bong posted:

Please tell us more about the brown shirts.

E: it's crazy to me that they actually try and give you demerits or something in town.

not caring here posted:

Telling someone you don't know who they are to produce ID so they can ruin your academic life sounds like a good way to get beaten purple and stuffed in a storm drain.

For a minute I thought I was going to be mugged going by the dude's body language but then LIBERTY MORAL ENFORCEMENT OFFICER, GIVE ME YOUR STUDENT ID!! and I'm all "gently caress you say?"

Pretty sure that reply short circuited his brain.

I've never heard of someone actually attacking them though. I suspect if someone did it'd get all Waco real quick. There's also the kind of person that Liberty attracts to consider as well. But yeah there's folks who have the job to ensure the students are adhering to the ~*values and virtues*~ of the school even off campus. poo poo like seeing an R rated movie = demerits, etc.

psydude posted:

Just think of how much someone has to suck to look at all of the other universities in Virginia and say, "I want to go to Liberty."

Yeah they're usually locals from nearby counties. The folks I knew that went there were all crazy eyed before, now they're that creepy dead crazy eyed, all glazed over and fake smiles that bear way too many teeth. For a while I dated somebody before they enrolled and they would quietly sing hymns to themselves after we fooled around so yeah, Stable As gently caress. Same person later conned myself and a mutual friend into Liberty's "Scared straight!!!... TO JAYSUS!" haunted maze bullshit. Lotta familial pressure in those kids, full on "if you venture past the county line you're kin no longer!!" and "I built you a house behind mine now make with the grandchildren no you don't get a say in this I'm your father" poo poo. Kinds of families with five, maybe six generations under one roof and always pridefully talk how it's a good thing that nobody has left in a century.

shame on an IGA posted:

I stopped to eat in Lynchburg once passing through it's some creepy poo poo. Even Bob Jones is better simply by virtue of being in Greenville.

Accurate. Also they got rid of the Sonic's and put yet another loving car wash in its place :argh:

The last time I was in Lynchburg I got home just as the sun was going down and there were dogs in the street and a shitload of cars at one of the five churches in town. None of the street lights were on, none of the lights in the houses were on either, but the church sure was lit up and the marquee outside read "God loves you whether you like it or not!"

Basically southern Virginia is Carcosa is what I'm getting at. :v:

Chichevache posted:

Tracy Porter agrees.

# ? May 13, 2017 23:22

Fister Roboto: Feb 21, 2008

loving lol not even military academies are that strict

# ? May 14, 2017 00:07

Mike-o: Dec 25, 2004; Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed; Grimey Drawer

Capn Beeb posted:

LIBERTY MORAL ENFORCEMENT OFFICER

That's some loving The Handmaid's Tale poo poo :stare:

# ? May 14, 2017 00:12

Mike-o: Dec 25, 2004; Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed; Grimey Drawer

It's even funnier how loving rabid religious conservatives are about how evil muslims are, and yet here we are, the pot calling the kettle black.

# ? May 14, 2017 00:13

Stultus Maximus: Dec 21, 2009; USPOL May

Mike-o posted:

It's even funnier how loving rabid religious conservatives are about how evil muslims are, and yet here we are, the pot calling the kettle black.

They don't think they're evil because they're fanatics, they think they're evil because they're fanatics about the wrong thing.

# ? May 14, 2017 00:17

Softface: Feb 16, 2011; Some things can't be unseen

Some idiot from my idiot high school wanted to be a biological engineer but didn't believe in evolution, so he went to Liberty University. He was a weird gently caress who dropped off all social media years ago so unfortunately I can't see how his life plan collapsed immediately and he had to enlist as infantry.

# ? May 14, 2017 00:33

Beeb: Jun 29, 2003

Mike-o posted:

That's some loving The Handmaid's Tale poo poo

Pretty much, yeah.

Softface posted:

Some idiot from my idiot high school wanted to be a biological engineer but didn't believe in evolution, so he went to Liberty University. He was a weird gently caress who dropped off all social media years ago so unfortunately I can't see how his life plan collapsed immediately and he had to enlist as infantry.

Sounds right. I know it's lovely to assume somebody ended up X way because they went to Y school, but all the Liberty graduates I know are complete dumpster fires. Like full on living in Squalor Holler with four kids, a fifth on the way, and wanting to move into the hills away from society with no contact with the outside and no indoor plumbing and poo poo.

I mean drat I may have hosed my life up flatter than hammered poo poo but I'm not yearning for the heady joys of gravity toilets and raising half a dozen children while working three minimum wage jobs.

Course the only reason this person is married is because her then boyfriend got her pregnant and if they didn't get hitched her dad would've full on murdered him and gotten away with it clean on account of "The brown impregnated my pure nubile white daughter and I, a certified Good 'ol Boy, am fulfilling my duty!". Being related to the sheriff is just a bonus. Her parents met when her dad was doing community service for stealing an air conditioner and saw her on the side of the road playing with dolls and was all nice. :banjo:

This is the kind of region where people can't have anyone else bad mouth it, swear up and down its great, but then in the next breath pray that their kids never return leaving you to wonder if it's because they know deep down there's nothing for them here or because it'd interfere with their day drinking. Heavy Trump country too when shitloads of people are alive because of the ACA. Same people that burn down five cigarettes in an hour while telling you about their adventures with cancer.

# ? May 14, 2017 00:44

MRC48B: Apr 2, 2012

Capn Beeb posted:

Her parents met when her dad was doing community service for stealing an air conditioner and saw her on the side of the road playing with dolls and was all nice.

# ? May 14, 2017 01:11

Woof Blitzer: Dec 29, 2012; [-]

I say it's high time we finally ratified the Corwin amendment in the age of Trump. States rights!

# ? May 14, 2017 01:24

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

Mike-o posted:

That's some loving The Handmaid's Tale poo poo

Liberty University would gladly execute something like that.

# ? May 14, 2017 02:24

SwampDonkey: Oct 13, 2006; by Smythe
(and can't post for 4 years!)

CommieGIR posted:

Liberty University would gladly execute something like that.

can you lay out a detail example for the class?

# ? May 14, 2017 02:57

CommieGIR: Aug 22, 2006; The blue glow is a feature, not a bug; Pillbug

SwampDonkey posted:

can you lay out a detail example for the class?

Do I really need to lay out why Jerry Falwell and Liberty University would cackle with glee at the suppression of women's rights? Do I?

# ? May 14, 2017 03:14

hobbesmaster: Jan 28, 2008

SwampDonkey posted:

can you lay out a detail example for the class?

Margaret Atwood laid out a detailed example called A Handmaiden's Tail. If you are allergic to reading amazon is producing a miniseries of it.

# ? May 14, 2017 03:16

SwampDonkey: Oct 13, 2006; by Smythe
(and can't post for 4 years!)

If you're in a typing mood sweetie.

Please do.

# ? May 14, 2017 03:16

SwampDonkey: Oct 13, 2006; by Smythe
(and can't post for 4 years!)

hobbesmaster posted:

Margaret Atwood laid out a detailed example called A Handmaiden's Tail. If you are allergic to reading amazon is producing a miniseries of it.

edit:

SwampDonkey fucked around with this message at 03:22 on May 14, 2017

# ? May 14, 2017 03:17

psydude: Apr 1, 2008

Why are defending Liberty University? I'm cool with most other conservative religious universities (I mean they rank just above ITT tech in a throw resume in the trash sense), but gently caress Jerry Falwell

# ? May 14, 2017 03:44

ded: Oct 27, 2005; Kooler than Jesus

Having people run around in the city looking for college age people swearing to get them in trouble is some nazi poo poo.

# ? May 14, 2017 03:54

bird food bathtub: Aug 9, 2003; College Slice

ded posted:

Having people run around in the city looking for college age people swearing to get them in trouble is some nazi poo poo.

Nazi, christian fundamentalist, potayto, potahto.

# ? May 14, 2017 03:57

Beeb: Jun 29, 2003

I once bumped into Jerry in town. He stumbled into a Subway with a woman on each arm and smelt faintly of bad cheese.

Unrelated although only partly because lol Appalachia's opiate problem is a nightmare and lol Vice and all, but holy gently caress:

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/medical-doctor-tom-price-recommends-god-as-the-solution-to-the-opioid-crisis

A massive idiot posted:

Asked about drug treatment options, Price touted faith-based programs while showing less support for medication-assisted programs in which addicts are weaned off heroin with other opioids like Suboxone and methadone.

"If we're just substituting one opioid for another, we're not moving the dial much," he said. "Folks need to be cured so they can be productive members of society and realize their dreams."

# ? May 14, 2017 04:06

SwampDonkey: Oct 13, 2006; by Smythe
(and can't post for 4 years!)

psydude posted:

Why are defending Liberty University? I'm cool with most other conservative religious universities (I mean they rank just above ITT tech in a throw resume in the trash sense), but gently caress Jerry Falwell

# ? May 14, 2017 04:12

Fister Roboto: Feb 21, 2008

Well, religion is the opioid of the masses.

# ? May 14, 2017 04:12

Casimir Radon: Aug 2, 2008

Capn Beeb posted:

I once bumped into Jerry in town. He stumbled into a Subway with a woman on each arm and smelt faintly of bad cheese.

Unrelated although only partly because lol Appalachia's opiate problem is a nightmare and lol Vice and all, but holy gently caress:

https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/medical-doctor-tom-price-recommends-god-as-the-solution-to-the-opioid-crisis

The replacing one drug with another is something I've been saying for years and not in a positive way. Should have asked him how he feels about Narcanon.

# ? May 14, 2017 04:18