|
looool truly spectacular ed balls
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:49
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 25, 2024 18:28 |
|
|
Ivanka is Jesus?
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:52
|
|
|
cumshitter posted:god drat that store was run by morons. they hired a 14 year old after telling him "you can't work here legally you're too young" and then put him through training and fired him like 5 weeks in I don't know if it's just because I'm tired but this is really funny.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:53
|
|
|
Time to chlorinate the gene pool.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:54
|
|
|
So wait why did you find out about the manager noticing a decade later?
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:54
|
|
|
on the day i left that job i, as a stupid 17 year old, left a bunch of fliers in the entrance area with stupid poo poo like: "Internal Memo from J. W. Albertson: homosexuals spend 17% more on groceries than the average consumer. Increase funding to the Gay Agenda and its recruitment efforts." and "When I signed up to work at Albertson's they had me sign a contract with an eagle feather quill. My signature flew off the parchment and into a tiny wooden box, and then I realized I would forever be slave to this company until I was able to remember my name." they called the police and i watched the front end manager shove the flier into the police officer's hands and the police lady was like "yeah, i thin kthi sis a joke you should calm down." they never suspected it was me, the guy who was on his last day of work, because someone stole the pile of fliers and kept slipping them under the manager's door for weeks after that. like apparently it drove the manager crazy and he would shove fliers into employees faces and demand they give up the mystery flier person (who was me)
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:58
|
|
|
Intel&Sebastian posted:looool perfectly timed post unless...... you waited for the snype!!!!
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:59
|
|
|
i would never do such a thing how dare you
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:59
|
|
|
Jeb! Repetition posted:So wait why did you find out about the manager noticing a decade later? maybe it's all fiction 
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 10:59
|
|
|
Jeb! Repetition posted:So wait why did you find out about the manager noticing a decade later? this was related to me after i left the job by a friend who still worked there so im not 100% on it but there was a coke and a pepsi vending machine in the employee break room so i thought it was weird i remember one guy i went to highschool with. every lunch break he would buy a sealed pack of Buddig deli meat and eat it slice by slice. i called him a ghoul and would watch him eat the entire bag
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:00
|
|
|
hell i wasnt even sure if nite crew celebrates ed balls for a sec there
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:00
|
|
|
checking in after a few hours. glad we solved religion
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:00
|
|
|
Intel&Sebastian posted:i would never do such a thing how dare you ok i believe you.. but i got my eye on you
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:00
|
|
|
cumshitter posted:this was related to me after i left the job by a friend who still worked there so im not 100% on it a long long time ago i used to work night shift shelf stocker / grocery clerk at a grocery store and everyone on night shift would just brazenly steal from the store
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:01
|
|
|
I was watching SNL's opening parody of the Lester Holt/Trump interview and the "nothing matters line" reminded me of this thread https://gfycat.com/TheseBigEagle
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:03
|
|
|
like the second or third time i ever got stoned was at that grocery store and my manager approached me and told me to mop the employee break room. i was really relieved because i was 100% sure when they were approaching me that they were going to curse me out in front of everyone for being a degenerate stoner then i spent like two hours mopping the same spot and running away to the bathroom every time someone came down the stairs because i thought i had a sign above my head saying "this person is HIGH on WEED"
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:04
|
|
|
Flavius Belisarius posted:checking in after a few hours. glad we solved religion https://twitter.com/aigkenham/status/863072636024311808 https://twitter.com/aigkenham/status/863071367666835461
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:05
|
|
|
galenanorth posted:I was watching SNL's opening parody of the Lester Holt/Trump interview and the "nothing matters line" reminded me of this thread I tried watching that but Alec Baldwin's Trump impression just pisses me off too much now.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:05
|
|
|
quick reminder that ken ham thinks we rode around on dinosaurs lol
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:05
|
|
|
Jeb! Repetition posted:I tried watching that but Alec Baldwin's Trump impression just pisses me off too much now. i like his impression baldwin was on stern a few weeks back. his approach to the trump impression is: "trump is always looking for a better word to describe something but he never finds it. thats why he has a 200 word vocabulary"
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:06
|
|
|
Baloogan posted:a long long time ago i used to work night shift shelf stocker / grocery clerk at a grocery store and everyone on night shift would just brazenly steal from the store one summer years back I got a temp holiday job at Target as an overnight stocker. something like half the computerized job app questions involved how big a narc you would be about stealing. 
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:07
|
|
|
i worked as a waiter for like a year while i was in undergrad (it fuckin sucked) and it was really eye opening to realize that literally every single person involved in restaurant work except maybe the managers were just constantly high, which i guess is what you can expect when you give a bunch of miserable people making minimum wage a cash payout every night
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:08
|
|
|
twitter is making celebrities of the scum of the earth, nuke the fuckin' thing.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:09
|
|
|
i remember the night i quit, some old guy (whos prob my age now lol) in a cheap suit and tie tried to talk me into staying and i was so sleep deprived and it was so absurd i just started laughing awkwardly in the middle of the conversation and it was infectuous and we both shared a laugh at some dumbass grocery store sub-manager or whatever trying to talk the dumbest grocery clerk into staying on
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:10
|
|
|
Intel&Sebastian posted:quick reminder that ken ham thinks we rode around on dinosaurs lol wait did we even have comfortable saddles fit for dinosaurs back 4000 years ago when the universe was created?
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:11
|
|
|
waiter / waitress sounds like the least pleasant job imaginable. food work, public facing, tips, dealing with everyone children old people grumpy people and there all HUNGRY
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:12
|
|
|
most big box retailrse have a thing called "code adam" which is when they say "code adam" on the loudspeaker and thats when all the employees go into hero mode and watch the doors and make sure some pedophile kidnapper cant leave the store with the kid they abducted. some kid named adam got kidnapped in the 70's or something and thats where it comes from they left the vhs for the training tape on it in the break room and we would watch it over and over because it was great. it ends with the kidnapper getting past a plucky bag boy by faking left and then going right before zooming out the door. he elaves the store without the child hes abducting the 14 year old who wasnt legally allowed to work there but worked there anyway stole it when he was fired for being 14
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:14
|
|
|
Intel&Sebastian posted:https://twitter.com/aigkenham/status/863072636024311808 wrap it up people, the ham has spoken.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:15
|
|
|
another dumb grocery store memroy: when i was 25 i used to go to a Vons near my home where there was a 1 armed bagboy he had a fake arm prosthetic though. except it didnt have any joints or anything it was like a peg leg for his arm it also wasnt properly sized. like his fake arm went 6 inches below his real arm and for no reason it had a giant vein on it which i thought was a wire for moving the elbow motor or something before i got a good look at it. nope, it was just a giant fake arm with no actual use to it. it was probably less functional than having a stump because i saw him bang it against the register desk a few times when he turned around
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:21
|
|
|
Intel&Sebastian posted:quick reminder that ken ham thinks we rode around on dinosaurs lol There's an exhibit in Ken Ham's museum that states, for some reason, that a layer of rock can never be above itself. This isn't true at a thrust fault or when the layer is folded and turned on its side, as is commonly found in mountain belts. You can see this yourself, put your hand on it, touch it, but Ken Ham says it's an atheist lie. I forgot where I saw it, but I majored in geology so I just remembered it as something that would seem egregious to anyone that has taken a single course in the subject 
galenanorth fucked around with this message at 11:24 on May 14, 2017 |
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:22
|
|
|
sometimes i get the urge to just post the word poop a lot
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:23
|
|
|
cumshitter posted:true story: so is she single
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:25
|
|
|
NecroMonster posted:sometimes i get the urge to just post the word poop a lot I think you'll find if you abstain from poop posting until you find that one special thread you want to share poop with for the rest of your life, the poop posting will feel that much sweeter
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:26
|
|
|
Baloogan posted:i remember the night i quit, some old guy (whos prob my age now lol) in a cheap suit and tie tried to talk me into staying and i was so sleep deprived and it was so absurd i just started laughing awkwardly in the middle of the conversation and it was infectuous and we both shared a laugh at some dumbass grocery store sub-manager or whatever trying to talk the dumbest grocery clerk into staying on I imagine you were like the dude in John Updike's A&P and you quit because you tried to white knight some girls in a bikini
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:27
|
|
|
galenanorth posted:There's an exhibit in Ken Ham's museum that states, for some reason, that a layer of rock can never be above itself. This isn't true at a thrust fault or when the layer is folded and turned on its side, as is commonly found in mountain belts. You can see this yourself, put your hand on it, touch it, but Ken Ham says it's an atheist lie. I forgot where I saw it, but I majored in geology so I just remembered it as something that would seem egregious to anyone that has taken a single course in the subject these look like my cats! one has full coloration and the other has white paws and belly Alan Smithee posted:so is she single yeah go for it man she came to the bar i was at and i was nodding off in my drug haze to a really good band but she forgot her ID. i called her and i was like, "yeah dont worry ill just buy the drinks and take them outside to the patio." except i keep forgetting that lots of men are rapists and poo poo so i didnt realize that "let me handle your drink where you cant see me" is not cool with a lot of women also she randomly told me she lied about her age and i just kind of ignored because theres no reason to dig that poo poo up if youve already decided a second date isnt happening . but yeah dude lets organize this. ill invite her to a bar and like well switch clothe sor something and you just take it from there. jus tremember to call yourself cumshitter thats what i told her my name is
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:30
|
|
|
Alan Smithee posted:I imagine you were like the dude in John Updike's A&P and you quit because you tried to white knight some girls in a bikini I love that story because the girls don't care about the protagonist, nor should they. Nothing matters and gently caress working in an A&P while it doesn't
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:30
|
|
|
cumshitter posted:true story: She's on you for the money so she can go back to her lovely neighborhood and say she hooked up with a big money private banker/FA/whatever the gently caress it is you do. She carries a chip on her shoulder the size of Everest and if you get tangled up on that kind of hosed up revenge fantasy you'll be divorced within 5 years with 2 kids and a boat you haven't paid off. Sever while you can. Do what I did and find a doctor who likes cats and being dinks and doesn't have hangups about her hometown because it's a 7000 person shithole on the banks of the Ohio River and getting out of there is more than enough.
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:34
|
|
|
i just relized i never even asked her what she did. im a terrible date also im a low level functionary at my job im not that fancy i just deal with fancy people a lot
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:37
|
|
|
NecroMonster posted:sometimes i get the urge to just post the word poop a lot do it, you can cause pooping problems if you hold it in
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:38
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 25, 2024 18:28 |
|
|
WAKE UP PEE BABY AND TWEET FOR OUR AMUSEMENT
|
|
#
?
May 14, 2017 11:40
|
|
