Antivehicular posted:It's pretty much always on the first page of the Goon Doctor, but here you go: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3469571 Ah, for some reason I didn't think to check YLS. Looked everywhere else though. Thanks, friendo.
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Jun 2, 2017 01:16
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Solice Kirsk posted:Oh god.....that was the thread with the chicken baby wasn't it? with the old woman? a very gross but funny story but i dont think it was real
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Jun 2, 2017 01:48
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Of course it wasn't, but it was still yucky and hilarious. And on theme because there was that story either just before or after from an EMT about a woman that had a tampon infected into her and she pulled it out in front of them and just poured rancid goop onto the floor.
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Jun 2, 2017 02:59
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Facebook Aunt posted:Just a few years ago we were making fun of dollfuckers. Now goons are all "please just gently caress dolls, don't kill anyone".
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Jun 2, 2017 03:13
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i did try sarching for old woman rotten chicken vagina for a bit but i dont like translating too many weird sentences in my head
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Jun 2, 2017 03:17
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Hogge Wild posted:was that the thread where someone did a 50' ant? Is that when 50' Ant *doesn't* post in a thread, but someone mentions him, and then the thread is derailed for two pages with people debating his stories?
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Jun 2, 2017 03:56
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Girl is as weird as he is, yet still is gettin azn dick on the side
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Jun 2, 2017 03:59
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Lol that figurine thread owns
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Jun 2, 2017 06:26
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Powaqoatse posted:i did try sarching for old woman rotten chicken vagina for a bit but i dont like translating too many weird sentences in my head It's actually from a GBS thread about hosed up ambulance stories I think.
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Jun 2, 2017 07:33
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I have radiating pain and pins-and-needles going up my arm from a scorpion sting.
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Jun 2, 2017 08:40
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lolFish Of Doom posted:You know what? Good on you for just owning it, dude.
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Jun 2, 2017 08:48
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Big Centipede posted:I have radiating pain and pins-and-needles going up my arm from a scorpion sting. Hate those. It feels like alternating numbness and electric shocks with a throbbing pain underneath. Really odd uncomfortable sensation.
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Jun 2, 2017 10:26
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should you get that scorpion sting checked out? it sounds kinda dangerous
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Jun 2, 2017 10:30
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Powaqoatse posted:should you get that scorpion sting checked out? He knows what he's doing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XE-LMPHR_TY
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Jun 2, 2017 11:22
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ah ok i think, i think i feel pretty good about the video not being available
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Jun 2, 2017 11:48
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Powaqoatse posted:should you get that scorpion sting checked out? I've been stung by worse. This isn't a gimmick. I really did get stung by a scorpion please like and subscribe to get more content like this.
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Jun 2, 2017 12:26
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chitoryu12 posted:"My girlfriend got me a fuckable mannequin of herself so I wouldn't be lonely" is a rabbit hole I have concerns about going further down. Her being fake would probably be a more healthy relationship
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Jun 2, 2017 12:30
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Powaqoatse posted:ah ok It's a bullshit monster bug wars video like wow no poo poo a big Scolopendra heros can take a subadult Hadrurus wowwee
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Jun 2, 2017 12:30
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Big Centipede posted:It's a bullshit monster bug wars video like wow no poo poo a big Scolopendra heros can take a subadult Hadrurus wowwee *Godzilla roars and gross slurping sounds dubbed in to make the battle more interesting*
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Jun 2, 2017 13:10
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Panfilo posted:*Godzilla roars and gross slurping sounds dubbed in to make the battle more interesting* *Smash cut to bug doctor in darkened room* " S. Murderosa's claws are designed to tear. If he gets you in his grasp it's all over" *CGI animation of bug attacking camera*
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Jun 2, 2017 13:31
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Does anybody remember the Russian ambulance crew stories?
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Jun 2, 2017 18:46
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SaltyJesus posted:Does anybody remember the Russian ambulance crew stories? Weren't they joosing hardcore their entire lives?
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Jun 2, 2017 19:14
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SaltyJesus posted:Does anybody remember the Russian ambulance crew stories? That rings a vague bell, but I'm not recalling much in the way of specifics.
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Jun 2, 2017 20:02
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Yeah that was from one of the joose threads and it was hilarious.
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Jun 2, 2017 20:04
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I'm pretty sure there's a link to that somewhere in this thread, or at least a link to a thread that has a link to it
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Jun 2, 2017 20:14
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SaltyJesus posted:Does anybody remember the Russian ambulance crew stories? edit: found a different pastebin of it: https://ja.pastebin.ca/1679023
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Jun 2, 2017 22:06
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Solice Kirsk posted:He knows what he's doing. Do they make them fight for this? I guess they're doing their natural behavior and anyway i'd probably kill either one if they came out the shower drain. But you can definitely see the fear and panic in the hosed up tiny see-through lobster as the jazz hands snake reels it in and eats it
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Jun 2, 2017 22:27
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Jesus Christ that story. I had to stop at the snow globes it's too much.
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Jun 2, 2017 22:39
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That story is one of the all time internet classics let alone SA.also the one goon who tried krokodil,blacked out for a week and woke up divorced ,with a gran piano in his living room and trying to piece together what happened like a more hosed up version of the hangover.
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Jun 2, 2017 22:50
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ChainsawCharlie posted:That story is one of the all time internet classics let alone SA.also the one goon who tried krokodil,blacked out for a week and woke up divorced ,with a gran piano in his living room and trying to piece together what happened like a more hosed up version of the hangover. The joose was the stuff responsible for the blackouts. Krokodil just melted people's limbs off at an almost 100% success rate yet goons were still trying to get ahold of it because they were sure there was a "safe" way to take it.
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Jun 2, 2017 22:51
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lol I don't think any of the krokodil stuff on the forums was real, people joked about it in a thread once but that's it The phenazepam stuff was absolutely real and that's where the grand piano thing came from.
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Jun 2, 2017 22:56
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ChainsawCharlie posted:That story is one of the all time internet classics let alone SA.also the one goon who tried krokodil,blacked out for a week and woke up divorced ,with a gran piano in his living room and trying to piece together what happened like a more hosed up version of the hangover. This is like four different goon drug stories combined lol
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Jun 2, 2017 22:57
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Did he fix his marriage
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Jun 2, 2017 23:07
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It's the least dramatic of the joose stories but i always appreciated the guy who was crying because he punched his wife in the back of the head to prove she wasn't real
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Jun 2, 2017 23:26
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Pretty sure this didn't originate from SA, but I know it made the rounds here quite a bit a while ago: There's some quote where a really sad dude (maybe on deviant art?) said something like "All characters from all my favorite TV shows come together for a big party!" I tried to reference it as a joke and I realized I had no idea what is was from and Google isn't helping me. Anyone know what that's from?
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Jun 2, 2017 23:32
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Last Chance posted:Pretty sure this didn't originate from SA, but I know it made the rounds here quite a bit a while ago: I'm pretty sure it was from GameFAQs.
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Jun 2, 2017 23:34
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Last Chance posted:Pretty sure this didn't originate from SA, but I know it made the rounds here quite a bit a while ago: https://storify.com/HunkyJimpjorps/the-saga-of-gamemaster-anthony-s-birthdays-33-39
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Jun 2, 2017 23:36
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Last Chance posted:Pretty sure this didn't originate from SA, but I know it made the rounds here quite a bit a while ago: 
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Jun 2, 2017 23:37
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swamp waste posted:It's the least dramatic of the joose stories but i always appreciated the guy who was crying because he punched his wife in the back of the head to prove she wasn't real That one was great, but let us not forget the Joose-dealing goon that died on a park bench, resulting in Joose-ordering TCC goons discussing the best way to contact his family so that they could get refunds for their outstanding orders. Or the Joose-tripping goon that pulled a gun on his wife and child then cooked to death after passing out in his car in his driveway in the hot sun, resulting in his wife posting in TTC asking for advice on how to cover up the drug use so that the insurance payout wouldn't get kiboshed. Dillbag has a new favorite as of 23:51 on Jun 2, 2017 |
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Jun 2, 2017 23:39
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i think the piano guy ended up slow roasting himself in his car while high on some other dumb rear end combination of detergent and ground up flintstones vitamins
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Jun 2, 2017 23:40
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