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elise the great
May 1, 2012

You do not have to be good. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.

yeah I eat rear end posted:

I mean, I'd prefer a lot less tomato slices too but other than that I would.

post/username combo alert


e: well poo poo, that's a bad way to start a page. Have we discussed Stargazy Pie yet?

elise the great has a new favorite as of 07:41 on Jun 12, 2017

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SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Plinkey posted:

I used to have that desk.

What about the monitor?

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010

Stargazy Pie is always one of my favourites for the disconnect between “sounds magical and dreamy and like from a fairy tale“ and “is actually a bunch of upright fish“.

elise the great
May 1, 2012

You do not have to be good. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.
Like how can you make anything that nightmarish and name it after three of my favorite things-- pie, stars, and gays?

Otana
Jun 1, 2005

Let's go see what kind of trouble we can get into.

elise the great posted:

post/username combo alert


e: well poo poo, that's a bad way to start a page. Have we discussed Stargazy Pie yet?



The name makes sense because whenever I'm served it, I gaze at the stars wishing for a different loving plate of food.

bawk
Mar 31, 2013

pro tip for your jungle juice needs, buy a cooler with a spigot designed to drain water out of it and mix it in that, then you have a mobile dispenser of drink that has cup holders on its top

also the proper mix is "whatever is left in the liquor cabinet that isn't gin", plus a bunch of juice and whatever fruit is on sale at the supermarket when you're buying the juice

Luigi's Discount Porn Bin
Jul 19, 2000


Oven Wrangler

yeah I eat rear end posted:

The only major problem I see is the "crust". Vegan/gluten free/whatever crusts never, ever look appetizing and it looks more like eating a cracker with stuff on it than a pizza. At least this one has real cheese. I mean, I'd prefer a lot less tomato slices too but other than that I would.
Apparently "fathead crust" is basically grated cheese, egg, and ground almonds. So this is cheese on top of nutty cheese. I would 100% demolish that pizza.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

I'll make a healthy veg friendly gluten free crust!

(crust is made entirely of nuts and cheese)

EoinCannon
Aug 29, 2008

Grimey Drawer

Synthbuttrange posted:

I'll make a healthy veg friendly gluten free crust!

(crust is made entirely of nuts and cheese)

But fat isn't as bad as they used to think!

*Interprets this as license to consume massive amounts of fat*

Data Graham
Dec 28, 2009

📈📊🍪😋



I mean for an Atkins pizza it makes sense.

Keto diets work, they're just gross as gently caress and I don't vouch for how sustainable the results are or what happens to your arteries.

Okua
Oct 30, 2016


vegan chocolate mint ice cream

Rumda
Nov 4, 2009

Moth Lesbian Comrade

Okua posted:


vegan chocolate mint ice cream

:itwaspoo:

voiceless anal fricative
May 6, 2007

Okua posted:


vegan chocolate mint ice cream

My first guess would've been curry paste.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

Yeah I was guessing curry. Oh well!

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010

Vegan ersatz foods and diets always remind me of Lewis Black's old line "if you're lactose intolerant you can't drink milk, okay? That's the deal!"

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

Disco Salmon
Jun 19, 2004

worthless. posted:



I mean, probably still would.

I make these all the time etc...and they left it in wayyyyy too long. Its not usually that dark unless you were not paying attn. Also, its way too much in toppings for it. It is so much better with less toppings. I know its kinda weird but it is actually pretty good! I have a lot of people who are not on Keto that love the Fathead dough and prefer it to normal pizza.

Its almond flour, mozzarella cheese, cream cheese, an egg and a little salt, and throw in some herbs like rosemary/garlic etc. Very easy and its fast.

Personally, I wouldn't eat that one...it is way overdone for my taste.

Disco Salmon has a new favorite as of 16:23 on Jun 12, 2017

axolotl farmer
May 17, 2007

Now I'm going to sing the Perry Mason theme

yeah I eat rear end posted:

Vegan/gluten free/whatever crusts never, ever look appetizing and it looks more like eating a cracker with stuff on it than a pizza.

Flour, water, yeast, salt, olive oil.

Vegan pizza crust is just regular pizza crust? :confused:

yeah I eat ass
Mar 14, 2005

only people who enjoy my posting can replace this avatar

axolotl farmer posted:

Flour, water, yeast, salt, olive oil.

Vegan pizza crust is just regular pizza crust? :confused:

I was conflating the two because usually if someone goes out of the way to specify they want vegan crust they'll want it gluten free too.

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008

Hippie Hedgehog
Feb 19, 2007

Ever cuddled a hedgehog?

yeah I eat rear end posted:

I was conflating the two because usually if someone goes out of the way to specify they want vegan crust they'll want it gluten free too.

Why why why do people do that?
All the vegans I know tend to eat a lot more gluten than most people because it's a good source of protein. Seitan etc. None of them would ever consider eating gluten free.

The Glumslinger
Sep 24, 2008

Coach Nagy, you want me to throw to WHAT side of the field?


Hair Elf

Al! posted:

my concept is that i want to produce three courses that accruately communicate my feelings about ranch to the diner. i will introduce the theme of each dish as it is presented to you.

the theme of first course is pain. i have plated a trio of ranch-dusted penny nails, a ranch-dipped chile japones and as a drink pairing, a shot glass - rimmed with crushed cool ranch doritos - of seagrams gin, with a single drop of blood.



Al! posted:

main course:

theme: in-edibility

this course includes hdmi cable gnocchetti served room temperature tossed lightly with a ranch balsamic vinagrette and locally-sourced microgreens, a ranch and egg yolk mock-egg, a blackened-tortilla "taquito" with ranch/sardine foam, topped with a fillet of sardine with mustard sauce




because i like you guys im gonna share my favorite forging location but do not absolutely DO NOT share this plz




Al! posted:

dessert:

theme, nausea

this one actually takes a bit of explaining. the lines of turbinado sugar and "spicy ranch seasoning" are meant to be insufflated into the sinus cavity, causing an immediate, intense, and lasting sense of pain and nausea. this is paired with a cube of pepto bismol gelatto, and a trifle with layered ranch, salsa, "sandwich spread" (i think its mayo mustard and relish, real vile stuff), and barbecue sauce, served with a cool ranch corn crisp ;) and another cube of the pepto


Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

69420 basic bytes free

This is beautiful

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008

So, I guess she doesn't like ranch huh

Elysiume
Aug 13, 2009

Alone, she fights.
One of my college friends hated ranch so much that he'd get worked up if someone even mentioned it. Ranch is a controversial condiment.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

Elysiume posted:

One of my college friends hated ranch so much that he'd get worked up if someone even mentioned it. Ranch is a controversial condiment.

Ranch is an abomination and the catalyst for the apocalypse

mds2
Apr 8, 2004


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Iron Crowned posted:

Ranch is an abomination and the catalyst for the apocalypse

Bring on the ranch!

Philippe
Aug 9, 2013

(she/her)

axolotl farmer posted:

Flour, water, yeast, salt, olive oil.

Vegan pizza crust is just regular pizza crust? :confused:

It's got yeast in it! Bacteria are alive, and can feel pain. You murderer!

putrid aidsman
Apr 13, 2017

by Lowtax

This image came from an ancient Helldump thread. Click here to find out what else this goon liked to eat

Arivia
Mar 17, 2011

Or we could not link lovely old pages of transphobic jokes

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Hippie Hedgehog posted:

Why why why do people do that?
All the vegans I know tend to eat a lot more gluten than most people because it's a good source of protein. Seitan etc. None of them would ever consider eating gluten free.

If they're a vegan because it's a fad diet and not actually as a moral choice, they're going to be anti-gluten too.

Hippie Hedgehog
Feb 19, 2007

Ever cuddled a hedgehog?

Picnic Princess posted:

If they're a vegan because it's a fad diet and not actually as a moral choice, they're going to be anti-gluten too.

My only hope is the fad will die off quickly since they clearly have no concept of proper nutrition so their brains will quickly shrivel from lack of essential amino acids etc.

Hippie Hedgehog has a new favorite as of 22:26 on Jun 12, 2017

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008

Hippie Hedgehog posted:

My only hope is that person will die off quickly since they clearly have no concept of proper nutrition so their brains will quickly shrivel from lack of essential amino acids etc.

Fify

Sakurazuka
Jan 24, 2004

NANI?

How many people on gluten-free vegan diets are there? Are we angry at people that don't exist again?

Spuckuk
Aug 11, 2009

Being a bastard works



Sakurazuka posted:

How many people on gluten-free vegan diets are there? Are we angry at people that don't exist again?

I've met several.

Insufferable pricks to a one, and all eating gluten free because it's 'healthier'

ACES CURE PLANES
Oct 21, 2010



https://twitter.com/yokotaro/status/874366358649176064

root beer
Nov 13, 2005

Sakurazuka posted:

How many people on gluten-free vegan diets are there? Are we angry at people that don't exist again?

My wife was one of them, but that's because at some point she connected intense GI pain with wheat. It did work for a while, though it was likely a placebo effect, because she eventually came to realize that a lot of her pain was from anxiety. The veganism is a personal choice, but she's not vehement about it nor will she browbeat others over it because she doesn't want to be one of those people.

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008

Spuckuk posted:

I've met several.

Insufferable pricks to a one, and all eating gluten free because it's 'healthier'

I'm a chef, and every single one of them can go straight to hell.

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

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ToxicSlurpee
Nov 5, 2003

-=SEND HELP=-


Pillbug

Spuckuk posted:

I've met several.

Insufferable pricks to a one, and all eating gluten free because it's 'healthier'

How in the hell do you even do that? Like at that point what do you eat?

Vegetarianism is like...yeah OK that can't be too difficult, just don't eat meat, get some beans for protein and some eggs, you're good to go. Vegan is like...OK that's expensive and not easy but you do you, I won't judge. But vegans trying to out vegan each other is just...wut.

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